~Theme For A Dream~
EPILOUGE: -
~2 years later-Shimla(Malik Mansion),Dinner~
"Ridhima, bache thoda sa khalo na, aise kaise chalega?" said Ananya (Armaan's mom) as she walked behind Ridhima holding a plate of freshly made sandwiches, pestering her to eat. "Ha bacha aise thodi hota hai kuch to khana hoga na, agar yeh nahi khana to bolo hum kuch aur bana denge but khana to hoga na" addded Nandani (Armaan's dadi) who was also trying her best to feed Ridhima something "Nahi mama, dadi, pls mujhe kuch nahi khana" said Ridhima whining as she took a seat on the living room couch beside karan (Armaan's dada). "Arey kya hua? kyu pareshan kar rahe ho meri princess ko..." asked karan as he saw Ridhima pouting. "Ha ,dekho to kaise chehra utar gaya hai iska" said billy (Armaan's dad) who was also present there. "Aap dono zara chup rahiye, ek to hum kabse ise khilane ki koshish kar rahe hai, subha se usne sirf adha glass juice aur adha parantha khaya hai, aur bajaye yeh ki aap ise samjhaye aap dono to hum par hi baras rahe hai..." said Nandani glaring at the two men for their foolishness. "Ridhima bache what is this? dadi kya keh rahi hai princess, aap kyu nahi kha rahe ho? You know na is halat mein bhuke pet nahi rehni chahiye, chalo jaldi se kuch kha..." said karan in a gentle tone trying to explain her but he stopped midway when he saw two big fat tears roll down her cheeks making all 4 of them worried, Billy was the first to come to her and ask..."Arey Ridhima beta aap ro kyu rahe ho? kya hua beta?"..."Pa..papa mujh...mujhe kuch nahi khana...mujhe bo...bohot uneasy lag raha hai...pl...pls nahi khana..." she said in between her sobs making all of them sigh helplessly. Ridhima was 3 and half months pregnant for which needless to say everybody in the house was ecstatic. Armaan and everyone else treated her no less than a princess, taking care of all her needs and pampering her to no ends. They had come to Shimla to visit Armaan's parents and grandparents and also to celebrate Diwali which was just around the corner. However, at the moment there was a completely different issue going on at Malik Mansion, Ridhima who had woken up with a serious bout of morning sickness had refused to eat anything at all, as she felt extremely nauseous. Somehow Armaan was able to convince her to have half a glass of juice and half the paratha, but that's that, thereafter Armaan went away in the kitchen saying he had some work, while everyone else tried convincing her to eat, but now that she started crying they felt utterly helpless and bad for her, they knew she felt sick but it was also important for her to eat something. Nandani sat beside her on the couch and took her in a motherly hug..."Ridhima...nahi bache, aise thodi rote hai, chup ho jao..." she said gently wiping her tears but Ridhima's tears seemed incontrollable, blame it on the pregnancy hormones. Just then as if on cue Armaan walked into the living room holding a covered plate..."Basket dekho main kya..." he said excitedly but stopped midway when he saw a crying Ridhima hiding in Nandani's arms, making him super worried..."Ridhima! kya hua?'' he asked tensed as he approached her keeping the plate in the table in front. The moment she heard him she turned around and hugged him tight catching him off-guard for a second but nonetheless he gathered her in his arms and rubbed her back to calm her down..."Ridhima kya hua baby? aap roh kyu rahe ho?" he asked her softly but when she did not reply he looked up towards Ananya asking what the matter was. Ananya told him the entire thing and hearing her he breathes a sigh of relief, God what all had he though in a span of a few seconds. He looked down at his angel who was clinging to him like a cute little child; He could not help but smile at his little baby. He kissed the top of her head and gently parted from the hug. "Olle, my baby...itni choti si baat ke liye itne bade bade assun?" he said in a childish like tone, wiping her tears with his thumb. "Ar..Armaan main..." she tried saying something when he shushed her in between "Shh...tumhe nahi khana na kuch?" he asked her straight away hearing which she just shook her head as another tear slipped down her eye. "Okay, theek hai phir koi tumhe khane ke liye force nahi karega provided you stop crying right now..." "Par Armaan..." Nandani and everybody else tried opposing to what he said as it was obviously not possible for Ridhima to stay hungry but seeing Armaan blink at them assuring them they decided to let him take the matter in his own hands. If it was anyone who could convince Ridhima and yet keep her happy then it was him..."Pakka?" Ridhima asked sniffing a bit. "Bilkul...I promise na mein aur na hi koi aur tumhe khane ke liye bolega unless you yourself ask for it...isliye ab rona band karo, bilkul chup hmm?" he asked and seeing her nod and wipe her tears he smiled widely. "That's like my good girl" he said lightly kissing the top of her head. Then he very smarty turned towards Ananya and grabbing the plate he brought earlier he said "Maa...yeh jo BUTTER ROTIS maine banayi hai na, who aap please zara kitchen mein wapas le jaoge who kya ha..." "Butter Roti?" he heard a Ridhima's voice and gave himself a mental pat as he knew he hit a bullseye. However maintaining a straight face he turned towards her and spoke in plain tone..."Ha butter Roti, who maine tumhare liye banaye the, I thought you really like them to...but ab tumhe kuch khana nahi hai to and as promised I won't even force you to..." "can I taste them?" she asked slowly with her head bowed down making Armaan and everyone else smile wide but again Armaan maintained a straight face and asked her...''Are you sure Ridhima? Matlab tumhe yeh to nahi lag raha na ki mein tumhe force kar raha hu?'' seeing her shake her head which was still bowed down he decided to stop teasing her "well in that case of course you can taste it, after all tumhare liye hi to banaya hai na, lo taste karo" he said smilingly handling her the plate of hot-hot freshly made butter rotis. The moment she saw them her eyes lit with an unknown excitement, all nausea forgotten all she could think of were those yummy yummy rotis and so without wasting another second more she tore a piece and placing it in her mouth she moaned with utmost pleasure..."Mmm Armaan this is amazing, please can I have some more?" she asked hopeful while licking her lips making not only Armaan but everyone else smile wide as well. "Of course tumhare liye hi to banaya hai, you can have all of it" said Armaan himself tearing a piece and feeding her. Everyone else smiled wide as Armaan fed Ridhima both the rotis which she happily tucked in. Once that she finished Ananya who stood right behind her stroked her hair lovingly and asked "Aur chahiye apko bacha? You want me to make you some more?" hearing her Ridhima looked up and giving her best smile replied "Nahi Mama, abhi pet bhar gaya mera..." Each and every person present in the room specially Armaan had a huge smile playing on their lips as they saw Ridhima getting back to her happy, chirpy self and most importantly seeing her eat.
...Once
Everyone finished their dinner where Ridhima also manged to eat a small bowl of dal rice, well to be honest they somehow distracted her with various stories of Armaan's childhood and fed her, they all sat on the living room with their respective partners enjoying a cup of coffee and talking about the soon to be held Diwali bash during which they were also planning to announce the news of Ridhima being pregnant. "Pandatji shyam ko 7 baje laxmi pujan ke liye pohoch jayenge aur uske baad we can start the party" said Nandani, "Ha maa, maine caterers ke sath menue dekh to liya hai ek baar aap bhi dekh lo, aur Billy apne decorators se bat ki hai?" said Ananya...Like this everybody spoke about the work dividing it among each other except Ridhima who frowned on being ignored and so slightly piercing herself from Armaan's arms where she sat cuddled "Arey, mujhe bhi to koi kaam do! Sab mujhe bhul gaye" she said pouting her lips and folding her hands across her chest looking no less than an angry 1year old making Armaan chuckle and her frown deeper. However, controlling himself he pulled her back in his arms "Koi zazrurat nahi kuch karne ki, dekha bhi hai kitni weak ho gayi ho, khana kuch hota nahi aur mujhe bhi to koi kaam do' huh! Chupchap araam karo" he said scolding her lovingly. "Par ab main theek hu...even I want to help" she said masking the cutest puppy face but unfortunately nobody was willing to let her help. When everyone refused bluntly she looked towards Karan knowing very well that he dotted on her too much to see upset. "Ridhima dadu ko dekhne se kuch nahi hoga I am sure is baar who bhi nahi manenge, your health is of utmost important" said Armaan knowing very well what she was trying to do. 'Armaan sahi keh raha hai bache apko araam karna chahiye na is halat mein aap kya kaam..." Karan tried to reason with her but she once again looked at Karan with pleading eyes "Pls dadu, I promise mein kuch heavy kaam nahi karungi..." she said making Karan sigh hard. Armaan and everyone else kept shaking their heads indicating karan to not agree but seeing Ridhima Karan did not have to refuse her, after a lot of thinking he finally got an idea that he was sure would work, "Hmm ab Ridhima itna bol rahi hai, to ek kaam karte hai why don't you help in the decorations matlab dekho tum apne suggestions dedo aur jab Armaan aur Billy kam kar rahe ho to tum in dodno ko supervise bhi kar lena, kyu hai na caha idea?" said Karan, only to receive a loud squeal from Ridhima who seemed like she just won some amazing prize "Yayyy! Thank you dadu, you're the best...". "aap bas ise bigadte raho dadu, iski har zid puri karke na aap ise aur ziddi banate ja rahe ho" said Armaan in mock irritation making Ridhima poke her tongue at him, while everyone else just chuckled at the two of them. "Armaan, tum to kuch bolo hi maat, sabse zyada to tum hi Ridhima ki zid puri karte ho, sabse zyada to tum hi use pyaar karte ho" said Aanaya. Hearing her Ridhima turned a deep shade of red and hid her face in Armaan's chest..."Hmm yeh to hai, main hi ise ziddi bana raha hu, kyu basket?'' asked Armaan slightly prying her from his arms while hearing him she just looked up at him with her big brown eyes, looking just like a little child who is being scolded by his or her parent. She looked so cute that Armaan could not help but curve his lips into a dimpled smile..."Par kya karu mom, mein is ziddi bache se bohot pyaar karta hu, I love her a lot" he said as he dropped a kiss on her forehead making her close her eyes. As soon as he broke the kiss she opened her eyes and they both shared a beautiful eye lock till of course their elders decided to tell them that they were not alone...Everyone kept talking, discussing about the preparations while in between Armaan kept rubbing Ridhima's arms to keep her warm, while she cuddled more into him making everyone else smile with joy and pride seeing the amount of love the two of them shared. After sometime Armaan felt Ridhima's shallow breathing on his chest and looking down he saw that his princess had fallen asleep. Ananya was the first to see this after Armaan "Arey Ridhima to so gayi" she whispered slowly grabbing everyone else is attention and making Armaan loop up from Ridhima. "Hmm, kaafi thag gayi hai I guess" Aemaan whispered lightly kissing the top of her head. "Kitni khush hai na Ridhima, mujhe to aaj bi yaad hai 2 saal pehle..." said Billy trailing off towards the end, not wanting to even think about those bitter memories. Suddenly the atmosphere in the room had changed from a happy one to a sullen one. "Yeh sab kya laike bhet gayi ho, kyu purani batein yaad karke apna mood kharab karaein, abhi khushi ka mauka hai sab kitne khush hai Ridhima kitni khush hai, so pls purani battein bhul jao sab. Vaise bhi raat kaafi ho gayi hai sab sone chalo, Armaan beta tum bhi Ridhima ko room mein sula do" said Nandani hearing which everyone nodded and called it a night. Armaan picked up a sleeping Ridhima in his arms who feeling the slight commotion stirred in her sleep and opened her eyes a bit "Ar..." "Shh go back to sleep sweetheart..." Armaan said kissing her forehead as he made his way towards their room and Ridhima who was too sleepy to say something just did as told and went back to her dream world. Armaan laid her gently on the bed and climbing on his side he pulled the comforter over them hugging her from behind. He looked down at Ridhima and saw her sleeping with a peaceful smile plastered on her face, involuntarily making him smile. As much as he wanted to he could not forget what had happened two years before and Billy saying it aloud only made those memories fresh in his mind. He sighed hard as once again those memories haunted him and once again looking at Ridhima he kissed the side of her head letting his lips linger there for a few second as he began to remember that horrible and painful past...
~FLASHBACK (2 YEARS BEFORE, MUMBAI) ~
It had been 2 days since Ridhima had gotten Shashank and Anjali arrested and for Armaan they had been the longest two days ever. Ridhima had changed overnight, gone was the bubbly, lively, cheerful Ridhima she was rather replaced by a quiet, workaholic, gloomy lady. It pained Armaan to see his basket so deeply hurt, though she never said anything after the breakdown she had but he could see it in her eyes, he knew it was her heart that was hurt and the fact that he was not able to do anything to soothe her pain left a bitter feeling in his heart...It was around 9 in the night when Armaan and Ridhima had returned back from a long and hectic day at Sanjeevani. Just as they entered Armaan said "Ridhima aaj khana bahar se order kar lete hai, Kaka bhi chute par hai and tum bhi bohot thaki lag rahi ho so I think its best we just order" "Nahi Armaan its okay, main bana lungi, tumhe vaise bhi bahar ka kahan kam pasand hai na I know, I am sorry mera dhyan hi nahi raha ki kaka chuti pe hai nahi to subha kuch banake jati but tum bolo tumhe kya khana hai and just give me 20 mins main..." she replied as she hastily made her way to the kitchen only to be stopped midway by Armaan. "Arey ridhima chill, mujhe koi problem nahi hai and tum sorry kyu bol rahi ho, you have nothing to be sorry about sweetheart subha vaise bhi nikalte nikalte bohot late ho gaya tha to tumhare pass time hi nahi tha ki tum kuch bana pao and there is absolutely no need for you to tire yourself any further than you already are, halat dekho apni yaar..." just as she was about to retort he placed his finger on her lips shushing her right then. "Shh...No more arguments on this, we are ordering food and that's final okay?" hearing the finality in his tone she had no other choice but to nod her head, though she was still disappointed with the fact that she was careless enough to forget about Kaka's holiday. "Good girl, ab tum bolo tumhe kya khana hai so ill order it right away ane mein bhi time lag jayega na" he said removing his phone from his pocket. "Anything would do" she replied making him frown a bit as she was always the one who loved ordering from out while he preferred his healthy homemade food, so whenever they would order she would take her own sweet time to first decide on a restaurant and then another hour to finalise on her dish. "Arey tum Ridhima hi ho na, Ridhima the foodie cum junkie, tum bol rahi ho kuch bhi manga du...soch lo agar maine koi ganda sa oats sandwich manga diya to" he teased her by calling her the nick name he came up with when he realised that she could live on junk food, in an attempt to get some response from her end but she just gave him a small smile in response making his heart bleed seeing her turn so "blah" towards life and her likes and dislikes. "Kyaa se kya ho gaya Ridhima, kya haal bana liya hai tumne apna. I know you still blame yourself for everything that happened, though the truth is far from that. Par kab tak basket, kab tak zindagi se bhagti rahogi, kab tak apni jhuti hasi se mujhe tasali dene ki koshish karogi ki tum theek ho when I know you're not, You're breaking from inside and it kills me that I am unable to do anything about it" thought Armaan as he stared at her, his eyes pleading her to break through her pretence. "Uhmm who mein fresh ho kar ati hu..." said Ridhima turning away and leaving immediately without giving him a chance to speak while he just stared at her retreating figure. The moment Ridhima reached the washroom she locked the door and sliding down against the cold wall she finally let her locked tears free. In a span of a few days so much had changed in her life, honestly she did not even want to live anymore but thinking about Armaan she stopped herself from doing anything stupid. If there was anything rather anyone that kept her alive then that was only Armaan but then again so much had happened, she lost so much in her life that she was scared what of Armaan left her too. She was tired of trying to act all okay when the truth was far from that. She really just wanted to break down in his arms and cry her eyes out but as comforting as the though sounded she refrained herself from doing so. Armaan had already done a lot for her, it was always about her in their relationship. He needs, her likes, her dislikes everything. He did everything possible to keep her happy but what did he get in return a wife who is so emotionally messed up. A wife who does not even know her actual roots. The fact that he still stayed with her, in spite of all the excess baggage with her life was like some sort of magical spell. She did not want to throw more of her pain on him, he had taken enough already he did not need more of it. Standing up she walked towards the basin and looked at her reflection in the mirror.
"humne tumhe pala, ghar diya, naam tak diya aur tumne humein jail pocha diya...kash us shootout wale din hi tu mar jati, duniya ka boj hi kaam ho jata"
"Arey iske to sage maa baap bhi ise apne se dur karna chahte the, tabhi to ise bachan mein hi chod diya, aur Smriti use bhi tumhari mausyat hi kha gayi"
"Who would want to stay with you, tum dekh lena Armaan bhi tumhe chod dega"
"Obviously, pata nahi kaha ka ganda khun ho, Armaan bechara bhi bas tumhe bechari aur lachar samaj kar jehl raha hai...par kab tak koi aisi ladki ko jhelega jisko khud ki phechan hi nahi pata"
"You know what? You're just not good enough...You're just not good enough...you're just not good enough"
"NOOO" She shouted, covering her ears as she recalled her last meeting with Shashank and Anjali, the previous day when she had gone to the police station to sign some papers. Unfortunately, Armaan had been busy in a surgery so she had no choice but to go alone, so even Armaan was unaware of what had happened there. All he knew was that she went and signed the papers, little did he know that she met the two of them and they as usual left no stone unturned to break her apart...Hearing her loud scream Armaan came and knocked on the door fanatically. "Ridhima kya hua??? Tum theek ho? Open the door Ridhima" he said banging hard on the door all panicked and worked up. As Ridhima heard him knock she wiped her tears and splashed some water on her face, taking a deep breath and calming her racing heart beats she opened the door only to see a highly concerned Armaan standing there. Without wasting a second he took her face in his hands as if to examine if she was physically hurt or something..."Kya hua baby? Aap chilaye kyu? Are you okay? Did you slip or something? Kuch to bolo Ridhima" he asked all at one go. "Armaan main theek hu, bilkul theek hu, see" she said smiling a bit trying to calm him down but how can her fake smile came him down. He could see her eyes were swollen and a bit red and that did no good to his already thumping heart. "Agar tum theek ho to why are your eyes red "he probed again catching her off guard. "Wo..woh mein...I was washing my face to aakh mein sabun chalu gaya isliya bas..." she said hoping that he would buy it and though not fully satisfies he did nod anyway. "Par phir tum chilayi kyu?" he asked as an after though ..."Wohh...who mujeh laga bathroom me cockroach hai so...but kuch tha hi nahi" she replied looking down. Armaan was somewhere not convinced with her answers but he did not want to dig further if she did not want to tell. "Hmm theek hai if u say so so jaldi se change karke neeche ajao, I have ordered pizza tumhe pasand hai na bohot and ha ab tumhari aakh zyada to nahi jal rahi na? agar jal rahi hai to mein koi drops..." "uhmm nahi ab theek hai, tum chalo mein bas jaldi se change karke ati hu" she replied making him nod.
...
Soon enough the two of the had their dinner which was not a very happy affair as it usually is for the two them. Armaan tried his best to initiate some conversation but she would just reply in monosyllable or one line sentences. After having dinner Ridhima went away to clean the kitchen and insisted to do it on her own, for she really did not want to bother him and reluctantly though Armaan was forced to agree. Finally finishing with all the dishes and stuff she made her way towards their room only to find Armaan laying on the bed with his one arm rested on his abdomen while he covered his already closed eyes with the other. Assuming him to be asleep she very carefully shut the lights and very carefully climbed on the bed not wanting to disturb him but the very second she got onto the bed he opened his eyes, slightly startled by the commotion. "Arey, tum kab ayi?" he asked in a sleepy voice "Who bas abhi ayi, I am sorry tum itne thake the aur meri vajah se neend bhi khul gayi tumhari" she replied feeling all guilty for disturbing him. "Arey pagal ho kya Basktet, mein to vaise bhi tumhari wait kar raha tha woh bas aise hi aakh lag gayi...Aur madam kabse dekh raha hu yeh kya sorry-sorry laga rakha hai har baat mein, humare rishte mein kabse sorry or thank you bolne ka tradition chalu hua ha?" he said gently pulling her in his arms making her rest her head on his chest. While she just stayed mum not really answering his question. It was one thing he noticed lately Ridhima had become very formal with him, she would feel guilty for the slightest of things and apologise profusely for the same. He just brushed this thought away with the assumption of simply overthinking things. Little did he know that she was not turning formal she was just trying to be good enough for him. The fear of him leaving her scared her to such an extent that she was scared to upset him even the slightest bit...They both laid wide awake in each other's arms just a soothing silence prevailing between them as Armaan caressed her waist while she drew imaginary patterns on his vest. After sometime Armaan spoke up "Ridhima" "Hmm" she replied tilting her head slightly upwards to look at him. "Woh aaj maa ka phone aya tha, bol rahi thi ki since next week is Diwali so we should go home and celebrate with them" he said. "Yeh to bohot achi baat hai Armaan, we should most definitely go I am sure sab tumhe miss karte hoge aur tum bhi to sab ki kitna miss karte hoge after all family is family..." she said. Armaan just rubbed her arms pulling her even closer if possible as he heard her voice turn shaky towards the end. She smiled lightly telling him she is okay though he knew she was from okay. "Acha to humein kab nikalan hoga? Aur Dr. Kirti? Unse permission bhi leni padegi na?" she asked simply changing the topic. 'Tum uski tension bilkul mat lo maine aaj hi Dr. Kirti se baat kar li hai and she is more than willing to grant us a 10 day leave. And ha we will be leaving day after tomorrow, subha 4:00 baje ki flight hai for Shimla." He said giving her the details required. "Hmm theek hai, to kal sanjeevani jane se pehle hi..." "kal sanjeevani jane ki zarurat nahi hai, due to some charitable function kal sab doctors ko chute hai so you can easily pack, kal jab tum police station gayi thi tabhi Dr. Kirti ne announce kiya tha, I am sorry it slipped out of my mind to inform you...Vaise Ridhima police station se yaad aya aaj mujhe inspector Sameer ka phone aya" he said and the moment she heard about the police station she froze, did the inspector tell him anything about her meeting with Shahank and Anjali. "Uhmm k...kyu phone kyu aya tha?" she asked trying to keep her voice as steady as possible. "Uhmm who kal jab tum papers sign karne gayi thi to shayad jaldi jaldi mein tum apna pan card waha bhul ayi ho maybe while giving your ID proof, to he just called me this morning asking to pick it up, unfortunately mujhe to time nahi mila isliye maine driver ko bej diya so now I have you're pan card, aur ha next time be careful jaan tumhe pata hai na kitna important hai yehs sab" he said while she sighed thankful that the inspector had not mentioned anything about her meeting with Shashank and Anjali cuz knowing Armaan he would have been furious just hearing about it. "Thank God, Armaan ko kuch pata nahi chaala warna pata nahi kya ho jata" she thought. "Hello kaha kho gayi madam?" asked Armaan seeing her lost in her thoughts. She just shook her head at him. "Acha anyway it's been a long a day and with all the packing and stuff we will have a longer day tomorrow so I guess ab humein so jana chahiye" he said pulling the duvet over their bodies. "Goodnight" she whispered while he did the same kissing he head lightly, hoping to change her mood and get his lively Ridhima back by the end of this trip.
...
It was the day Armaan and Ridhima were leaving for Shimla, in spite of it being a holiday Ridhima had very less amount of rest as she was busy running around gathering all last minute stuff and packing and as much as Armaan tried he could not really help her much cuz she really took everything upon himself, so much so that it worried him that she might fall ill with the lack of sleep but then thinking that she would rest in the flight brought him some relief. So finally the two of them were standing in the line at 3am ready to board their flights. Just as they were about to enter Armaan got a call from Sanjeevani regarding some discharge papers of some patient but unfortunately the network was a bit low there so the other person was not really able to hear Armaan asking Ridhima to get in he went to receive the call...Quickly ending his call he boarded the flight and made his way towards their seats. As soon as he got there he saw that Ridhima had taken the window seat and was starring towards the landscape of Mumbai that looked absolutely breath-taking at that time. She had a small smile playing on her lips admiring the beauty in front of her. Now he had this habit of sitting on the window seat every time he travelled but seeing that genuine though small but again genuine smile on her face after so many days he did not have the heart to make her get up and so settled beside her catching startling her due to the slight commotion, she was so lost in the view that she never really realised when he had come back "hello sweetheart, kya dek rahi ho?" he asked tightening his seat belt and checking hers as well making her smile at his overprotectiveness. "Kuch nahi, bas dekh rahi ki it's so beautiful na, lagta hi nahi hai ki this is the same loud and super-fast Mumbai city, it looks so calm and serene" She replied resting her head on his shoulder while the flight began to move. "Hmm, I know right it's so mesmerizing watching Mumbai like this, isliye mein humesha window seat pe baithna pasand karta hu so that I can watch such an amazing view" he said casually resting his head above hers, kissing her head in between, unaware that what he said in a casual tone was enough to make her feel guilty. She raised her head from his shoulder "I am so sorry Armaan, mujhe..mujhe nahi pata tha ki tumhe window seat, shit mujhe yaha bithna he nahi chaiya tha...Tum utho hum abhi..abhi seats swap karte hai" she said getting all worked up and thinking that she must have upset him by sitting on his favourite seat and the last thing she wanted was to upset him. Armaan on the other hand got extremely confused seeing her getting so panicky and he could really not understand why she was apologising, it was really not needed and secondly their relationship was almost the fun filled with banter and love one, they were never so formal with each other. He would rather be expecting a reply like "Acha, too bad ab to mein seat mein baith gayi na, try your luck next time Mr. Malik" but here she was feeling all guilty and was saying sorry so un-Ridhimaish. However, keeping his thoughts aside, he first decided to calm her down all his questions could wait till later. "Ri..ridhima shhh relax, it's okay baby why are you getting so worked up and why are you feeling guilty for nothing" he said cupping her face in his palms. "Par..woh window...tum...tum gussa" she stumbled trying to form a correct sentence involuntarily making alone tear slip from eyes which really worried him now. Something was seriously wrong "Ridhima bacha, mein kyu itni choti si baat par gussa hounga aur who bhu tumse, tum to meri jaan ho na? main tumse gussa kaise ho sakta hu baby?" he said wiping her tears yes he had a thousand questions running in his mind, her behaviour was way beyond his understanding but at the moment there was nothing more important than to calm her down. "Tum...Tum sachi gussa nahi...I am sorry...I am so sorry" she said looking up at him. Hearing her Brocken voice he took her in his arms and cradled her head against his chest..."Shh...mein bilkul bhi gussa nahi hu bacha and tum pls sory mat bolo, there is absolutely no need for you to feel or be sorry" he said gently rubbing her back in slow circles while she stayed mum. After sometime Armaan looked at Ridhima who had fallen asleep in his arms. She had a frown on her forehead and she held his shirt tightly in her fist as if her life depended on it. He very carefully picked up the blanket from the front pockets of their seats and gently draped it over the two of them. Just as he was turning the light above them off he heard her mumble something..."Don't...go...Leave...no" he tried his best but was unable to understand her broken words she was probably having some dream he thought, but whatever she was dreaming off must be really disturbing for her cuz she looked very restless so he simply pulled her closer, placing a lingering kiss on her head he whispered "Shh go to sleep baby, I am right here". With his soft caresses and frequent feather like kisses her frown slowly diapered and soon enough she was lost to the world, sleeping away feeling secure in his arms...He kept looking at her sleeping figure gently tucking a tendril of her hair behind her ear "I am sure there is something that's disturbing her so much, Ridhima ko itna formal apne sath maine kabhi nahi dekha and plus she has started panicking on the pettiest of things. Kuch to baat hai, I know she has still not recovered from the whole arresting the Gupta's scene but this behaviour of hers definitely has something more than just getting them arrested. Koi to baat hai jo shayad mein ab tak nahi janta but main jan kar rahunga, especially if it's upsetting my basket so much..." He thought bending and gently pecking her dry lips.
...After flying for around 3.5 hours AR finally landed at Shimla and were greeted by their loving family in the airport itself. Billy, Ananya, Karan and Nandini were ecstatic to see their children after such a long time. Armaan and Ridhima had gone in Karan and Nandani's car with Armaan driving and Karan sitting in font as both the ladies sat behind while Billy and Aanaya followed behind in their car. Through journey from the airport to their house both Karan and Nandani noticed that Ridhima was unusually quiet, they had met her once in person and many times over skype and as far as they knew her she was one very talkative girl, But today she seemed so lost, sad rather and they loved her too much to see her like this. Nandani ran a motherly hand on her hair and asked "Ridhima kya hua bacha, aap itne chup kyu ho? Koi baat hui hai kya? Tabyat to theek hai apki?" Ridhima was so touched with her concern, it was almost after forever that she felt this motherly love. Her eyes welled up seeing the love these people had for her, they were literally meeting her for the second time in person yet they cared so much that even her silence bothered them. "kuch nahi dadi, who bas it was a long journey na to thoda sa headache hai" she said looking down at her fingers. "Arey to apne pehle kyu nahi bola bacha, abhi ghar jate hi na I'll give you a head massage phir tum thodi der sojana okay? Dekhna shyam tak bilkul theek ho jaogi" said Nandani. "Ha bilkul, dekhna shyam tak to humari princess ayegi or bolegi kya dadu, mujhe Shimla bhi nahi ghumaoge kya" he said trying to make her smile but her eyes only welled up further seeing their love, however she somehow controlled herself and gave out a small smile...Soon enough they reached Malik Mansion where they made arrangements to welcome Ridhima like a newlywed bride, thereafter they all settled in the living room catching up with each other when Nandani who had left for bit came back with a bowl of oil in her hands and sitting on the sofa said, "Ridhima, ajao beta main tumhe massage kar deti hu phir tum thodi der rest karlo, hmm?" "Uhmm nahi dadi aap kyu takleef kar rahi hai, mein davai lelungi, theek..." Ridhima tried to refuse but it all fell on deff ears for the very next minute she heard Nandani's stren voice "Koi davai- shavai nahi leni, chupchap yaha ao, mujhe kuch nahi suna". Hearing the finality in her voice Ridhima quietly moved towards her and settled down on the floor letting Nandani give her a massage, while everyone just smiled seeing this. "Arey wah maa ke hath ka oil massage, Ridhima beta tum vakai bohot lucky ho tumhe pata hai maa ne kitne salon se kisi ko oil massage nahi diya hai because of her shoulder problem but seriously inke hathon mein to jadu ho and trust me at the moment to even I am jealous" said Billy, faking a pout only to receive a smack from Ananya. However the moment Ridhima heard about Nandani's shoulder problem she immediately turned around making Nandani stop the massage "I am so..sorry Dadi, mujhe yaad hi nahi raha apke shoulder problem ke bare mein...I am so sorry dadi, main kaise...I am sorry dadi mujhe apse bilkul massage nahi karwana chahiye tha, apko dard to nahi ho raha na? main...main hot compress ladu..." Ridhima said, rather ranted suddenly getting really worried. Seeing her panic so much everyone's smile faded specially Armaan's. "Ridhima relax bacha...kuch nahi hua, yeh billy to bas aise hi keh raha tha, Nandu bilkul theek hai bache, you need not worry at all, haina Nandu?" said Karan trying to calm a really panicked Ridhima down. "Bilkul! Main theek hu princess tum khamaka ghabra rahi ho...I am absolutely fine" assured Nandani. "Par...par apka hath?" asked Ridhima in a choked voice still a bit unsure and before nandani could say anything they heard Armaan reply in a joking mannar in an attempt to ease the situation "Arey basket, tum bhi na choti choti baton par serious ho jati ho, Dad to bas apna luck try kar rahe the ki shayad dadi unhe bhi ek massage dede..." "Bilkul sahi, Billy aap bhi na bewaja bachi ko itna dara diya" scolded Ananya lightly. "Acha ab yeh sab chodo Ridhima beta tum vakai bohot thaki hui lag rahi ho, thodi der jake rest karlo, Armaan take her upstairs and tum bhi thodi der rest karlo you also must be tired" said Karan while everyone else just agreed.
... Armaan took Ridhima to their room and asked her to freshen up and change. After around 20 minutes Ridhima came out of the washroom dressed in something for comfortable only to find that Armaan had changed too. "Arey agayi tum? I was waiting for you only, come let's get some sleep for a while" said Armaan patting the bed lightly asking her to come and sleep. She willingly obliged and climbing on the bed she placed her head on his chest, and hugged him tightly from his waist seeing this Armaan smiled widely and lovingly kissed her temple. He kept rubbing her back in soft circles and soon enough the fatigue took over her body and she dosed off, seeing this Armaan very quietly pulled the duvet over them and dimming the lights further he too let his body have its share of rest...After two hours Armaan woke up with a grumpy cum hungry stomach. Looking around he grabbed his phone to see that it was already past 1pm no doubt he was so hungry he thought. He saw Ridhima was still fast asleep in his arms; he knew she was very tired and thus he decided against waking her up. He very gently placed her head on the pillow and making sure that she is well tucked in he made his way downstairs to please his growling tummy. As he went down he found everyone else sitting in the living room talking among themselves. Ananya was the first to see him "Arey Armaan uth gaya beta, Ridhima kaha hai?" she asked lovingly caressing his head as he sat near her foot resting his head on her lap. "Hmm who so rahi hai mom, bohot thag gayi thi isliye I did not wake her up" he replied closing his eyes as he enjoyed his mother's gentle caresses. Ananya bend down a little and kissed his forhead lovingly "Acha kiya, let her rest...Acha tujhe bhuk lagi hogi na? tere fav aloo ke parantha banaye hai abhi lati hut ere liye" she said making him smile widely "I love you mom, you're the best" he said kissing her cheek as he let Ananya get up and get him some yummy yummy aloo parathas...As he was busy eating the parathas Billy asked the question that everyone was dying to ask. "Armaan beta, Ridhima theek to hai na?" hearing this Armaan frowned not really getting what Billy meant. "Ha dad she is fine, par aap aise kyu puch rahe ho?" "Beta woh bas aise hi, she seems unusually quite aur uski akhon mein bhi ek ajeeb si udasi hai...Koi baat hui hai kya beta?" now asked Karan. Armaan sighed as he realised what they were talking about, but at the moment even Armaan could not really answer this question as he himself was not aware of what was bothering her so much. "Pata nahi dadu, mujhe bhi kuch samaj nahi araha, I know she is upset over the fact that usne Gupta's ko arrest karwaya...But it has more to do than just that...I have never seen her so vulnerable dadu, choti-choti baton par dar jati hai, har baat pe khud ko galat samajti hai, blame karti hai...I just don't understand ki aise konsi baat hai jo use itna pareshan kar rahi hai" said Armaan feeling utterly helpless. "It's okay beta, shayad she is still trying to get over the whole gupta's thing after all jo bhi hua use bhul pana itna asan nahi hai beta, thoda waqt to lagega na" said Ananya. "I know mom, I know asan nahi hai and I very well know that it still hurts her a lot but mama there is something more...I know, I just know" said Armaan in a choked, hurt voice. There was pin-drop silence for a while as everyone heard Armaan. After what seemed liked forever Armaan got up "I'll go check on Ridhima" he said and without wasting another second he left from there not wanting anyone to see his tear filled eyes. "Kitna kuch saha hai in dono ne, I hope bhagwan ab bas inki jeewan mein khushiya laye" said Nandani as she saw Armaan's retreating figure while everyone just nodded and hmmed in response.
... As Armaan entered the room he saw his angel still sleeping peacefully. She had a small frown adoring her forehead probably cuz of the fringe that kept falling over her face. He walked towards her and sat just beside her head. He very carefully removed the fringe from her head only to see her frown slowly disappear. He smiled for a second seeing the peaceful look on her face which was a complete contrast to her current restless state. He kissed her forehead hoping that soon she would share her worries with him. He sat there and just kept staring at her for what felt like forever. He was brought out of his trance by the ringtone of her phone he got up to answer it quickly so as to not disturb her and as he grabbed her phone in a hurry from the side table his hand hit her hand bag which was lying right there. Quickly answering the call, he bit his tongue hoping the commotion did not wake her up and fortunately it had not. He cut the call quickly as it was just a sim card advertisement call and began to pick the things that had fallen from her bag when suddenly his eyes fell on a diary, which happened to be hers, he was surprised for a second cuz he never knew that Ridhima wrote a diary and as much as he wanted to protect her privacy his curiosity got the better of him and he opened it to read it. However, as he started reading it he realised that the diary was started from the time she came home after the shootout. It basically contained all her feelings from the time she came to know about her adoption after the shootout, how she wished that Shashank would accept her again and of course the whole Raghu fiasco. His heart ached to see how much pain she had gone through, how she prayed day in and day out for the Gupta's to accept her again when it should have literally been the other way around. He really hated the Gupta's for hurting his Ridhima so much but as he read further he only got angrier as he read about Ridhima's meeting with the Gupta's at the police station. She had mentioned all those bitter words that they had thrown at her, she had also mentioned about her insecurities of "Not being good enough" and how she felt that Armaan too would leave her someday but his anger reached its height when he read a part where she had mentioned about how tired she was of life and would rather just end it. As soon as Armaan read that he shut the diary in peak anger. He cursed the Gupta's for making Ridhima go through so much, for putting her through a phase of utmost mental torture, for polluting her mind to such an extent that she was now scared that a slight mistake from her end would result in losing him, for making her believe that she was not good enough for him, for making her think so low about herself. He now realised why her behaviour had changed so much, why she panicked at the tinniest of things. He was also angry on Ridhima she should have told him all this at least once, why did she have to torture herself to such an extent, why did she believe those good for nothing Gupta's, and most importantly how dare she think about ending her life didn't she know what she meant to him...He looked at Ridhima who was still sleeping and promised himself that no matter what he would get some answers she would have to speak, he was not letting her shut herself and brood on such baseless insecurities. That day when she had finally cried out he thought that she had finally let everything out little did he know that there was still so much she had kept inside her so much that still haunted her and hurt her to no extent? He saw her stir a bit seeing which he immediately hid the diary in his cupboard and fortunately he was just on time for the next second he heard her groggy voice "Armaan...tum uth gaye?" as he turned he saw her sitting herself up while she rubbed her sleepy eyes. She looked like a little baby who had just woken up from his afternoon nap, he wanted to go and take her in his arms but then he remembered about the diary and all that she had written in it so turning his face he replied with a cold voice "Ha mein kabka uth gaya, bas tumhe hi uthane aya tha, jaldi se ready hokar neeche ajao sab tumhara wait kar rahe hai" saying so he walked out leaving Ridhima really confused at his behaviour, normally when she would wake up he would baby talk her and make her feel so loved but now he seemed so distant. She wondered if she had done anything wrong to anger him and that very thought made her heart sink but then yet again she could not think of anything so just brushing her thoughts off she got up and quickly getting ready headed downstairs to join the family. She sat with everyone and joined in their conversations but all throughout she noticed that Armaan had been silent and kind of cold towards her she as usual thought about the worst and it just made her restless. As it was almost evening time she somehow convinced Nandani and Ananya to let her make some snacks for everyone as by that time everyone was hungry. She had gone and made some coffee along with some yummy-yummy pizza bites which everyone relished. She was so happy seing everybody enjoy the food prepared by her. "Ridhima beta sach its really tasty, aur Armaan ka to favourite hai dekho to kitne maze se kha rahe hai, kyu Ammy aren't they made amazing?" asked Ananya praising her daughter in law. Armaan who was till now eating quietly looked up as he heard Ananya question him. "Ha mom, ache to hai but they aren't GOOD ENOUGH" he said looking staring towards Ridhima making her look up at him in utmost shock. "Ammy kya bol raha hai, itne ache to banne hai" said Nandani defensively. "Ha dadi ache to bane hai but like I said they are not GOOD ENOUGH and I feel I can have BETTER, haina Ridhima" he said looking into her confused eyes stressing on the words he had read in her diary about her not being good enough and that how he deserved someone better. No doubt Ridhima felt really bad with his words but all she did was nod at him. She did not understand what had happened in a span of a few hours, did she do something wrong? Why was he so upset on him, was he so upset that he could leave her? These questions kept haunting her mind. "Arey tu chup hi baith kuch pata hota nahi, Ridhima bache tum is bewakuf ki mat suno the pizza bites are really good in fact tum yeh recepie Nandu or Ananya ko bhi de do taki who bhi for a change tumhari tarah ache pizza bites bana sake" said Karan trying to lighten the tensed to which Ridhima just smiled lightly while Armaan just looked away not really wanting to have a confrontation in front of everyone as he knew that such things are better done in private.
... Ridhima was busy arranging her clothes in the wardrobe as there was still time for dinner and nobody was really letting her do anything. She folded her clothes carefully and placed them neatly when suddenly something struck her mind, she grabbed her hand bag and opening it frowned hard for she could find her diary. "Meri diary kaha gayi, yahi pe to rakhi thi" she though and began to search for it frantically. "Kahi ise to nahi dhund rahi ho" she turned around immediately hearing Armaan's voice and what she saw literally made her freeze. Armaan stood near his cupboard with her diary in his hands. He slowly walked towards her not breaking the eye contact even once. "Kya hua Ridhima, tumhara chehra peela kyu pad gaya? Kahi tum mujhse kuch chupa to nahi rahi na" he asked in a dangerously cold voice as he tucked a hair strand behind her ears."Ar..Armaan meri diary tum...tumhare pass kaise?" she stammered."kyu? nahi honi chahoye thi kya? I thought we share everything with each other so if I read your diary it should not matter right? "he said, his voice lacing with anger as he maintained his cold tone, his reply and tone was a clear indication for Ridhima that he had read her diary and was undoubtedly mad at her for hiding so many things from her. Seeing the range in his eyes she gulped hard "Ar..Armaan main'' she tried saying something in her defence but was cut off by Armaan "Main kya Jaana?, kuch kehna hai mujhse, koi baat share karni hai...ya phir humesha ki tarah mujhse baat chupa kar rakhni hai" he started off with a low voice but as he ended his voice began raising. "Ar..Arm..Armaan meri baat...baat sun.." "kya suno mein Ridhima, kya sunu mein yeh ki kyu tumne mujhe nahi bataya ki tum Shahsank Gupta aur Anjali Gupta se mili, ya phir yeh sunu ki kaise unke kehen par tumne man liya that you are not good enough for me and that I so to say deserve better, ya phir yeh suno ki kaise tum apni so called zindagi se thak kar APNI JAAN DENE CHALI THI" he yelled pulling her towards himself from her shoulders. Ridhima shut her eyes tightly while tears flowed freely on her cheeks as she realised the intensity of his anger , she was going to say something when she felt him leaving her shoulders "You know what Ridhima, it's not you it's me...I am not good enough for you, tabhi to tumne mujhe yeh sab batana zaruri nahi smajha, apna dard batna zaruri nahi samjha..." he said looking at her with hurt in his eyes seeing which she felt really bad and shaking her head tried to approach him but stopped midway when she saw him showing her his hand to stop her. "Pata hai Ridhima mujhe bohot garv tha ki main tumhe bohot ache se janta hu, tumhare har takleef ko pad sakta hu, but I guess I was wrong..."he said with a pained voice and as she heard him her eyes welled up even more she shook her head as her tears were flowing non-stop. "Na...nahi Armaan meri baat" she cried and instantly moving forward hugged him tight but unfortunately she never felt his arms around her . "Kya mera pyaar itna kamzor hai Ridhima? Kya tumhe mere pyaar par itna bhi bharosa nahi ki tum mujhse apna gam baat sako?" he questioned making her feel guiltier. Removing her arms from around him he was about to leave all upset with her and himself but she literally fell on the ground holding his leg crying out loudly..."Ais...asia nahi hai Armaan...pls mer..meri baat suno...ma..maine jaan buj kar nahi kiya" she said in between her hiccups still holding onto his leg. Armaan looked at her and felt really bad he really wanted to go and hug her, console her, tell her to not cry but he also knew this was needed. This time she had crossed a line, fine she did not want to tell him things, okay understood that she might have been scared but how can she even think about ending her life, did she nit once think about him and so without saying anything further walked out of the room leaving a very shattered Ridhima who kept calling his name.
...
It was around dinner time when Armaan had still not come. Karan called him to know where he is but Armaan just said that he was with some old friend and so might be late. Ridhima had politely refused to eat dinner and seeing her red puffy eyes and Armaan's sudden departure everyone understood that something was wrong with the couple, but thinking it to be there private issue they decided to not interfere and let them be for a while...It was past midnight when Armaan came back home he had drove towards the hill and just stayed there alone for some time trying to gather his thoughts. As he reached home, he found the house immersed in complete darkness. Without making the slightest of noise he made his way towards his room hoping that Ridhima was asleep for he was not sure if he was ready to face her but as he entered the room he found it empty, frowning he made his way towards the washroom assuming that Ridhima must be there but seeing the door of the restroom open his frown only deepened "Rat ke 2:30 bhaje kaha gayi hogi Ridhima" he thought as he was sure she was nowhere in the living room or kitchen for he himself just came from there. As he thought about this his eyes landed on the balcony door which was slightly open and so without wasting any more time he went there but as soon as he entered the sight infront of him twisted his heart and tore it in a million pieces. Ridhima sat on the far corner of the balcony with her knees pulled up and head resting on them. She had probably fallen asleep in the same position but the stains of dried tears were clearly visible of her face, plus being the month of October and being Shimla in general it was freezing cold outside and he could see her body shiver with the cool winter winds. He slowly walked towards her and crouching down beside her he called her name softly but when she did not respond after him calling her several times, he became worried for he knew that she was a light sleeper and so he carefully placed his hand above hers only to find her hand really warm which needless to say really made him panic. Touching her forehead, he realised she was indeed burning with fever and was also unconscious. So much for staying in the cold without any shield for so long, he immediately took her in his arms and brought her inside the room, laying her on the bed he covered her properly with the blanket and switched on the heating in the room he sat beside her and rubbed her palms trying to bring back the warmth in her body. He cursed himself for deep down he knew that he was to be blamed for her current situation, had he listened to her and not been so angry then probably the situation would have not gotten this bad. After a good one hour, he finally felt her stir a bit and mumble some words which he could not really get but the fact that she was getting back to her senses gave him huge relief. He caressed her head and bent towards her to hear what she was saying "Ar...Arman...so...sorry...don't le...leave me" as he heads her say this his heart bled in extreme pain, making him shut his eyes as tight as possible. "Ridhima I am right here baby, right here...please open your eyes sweetheart bas eek bar aakh khol do, please" he whispered, almost chocking on his own words. After whimpering for a few more minutes Ridhima finally opened her heavy eyes making Armaan breathe a huge sigh of relief. It took her a moment to adjust to the surroundings but the very second she saw Armaan, her eyes welled up and without thinking twice she tried to get up only to be left moaning in pain. "Ridhima, kya kar rahi ho? You have a hig efevr abhi behoshi se uthi ho, just keep laying, koi zarurat nahi hai uthne ki, you need to rest na baba?" he scolded her lovingly as he tried to make her lie down but she did not let him. "Na..nahi baat karni hai" she said controlling a sob to escape as she finally sat down taking his support. As soon as he heard her, he turned his face away, he so did not want to have this conversation right now specially because she was sick and also because he was still pretty mad at her and he did not want his anger to get the better of him and say something that he would regret later. "Ridhima please abhi tum bimar ho, you really need some medicines and rest, yeh baat hum kal bhi..." he said still looking the other way and involuntarily in a slightly cold tone "Nahi Armaan please mujhe aaj hi baat karni hai, I can't take this anymore...It hurts...It hurts so much" she said finally erupting into full blown sobs. Hearing her Armaan looked towards her to find her face covered in her palms as she cried her heart out. As angry as he was, he could not bear to see her so helpless and in so much pain and so he very gently removed her hands from her face and tenderly wiped off her tears making her look up at him with a surprised expression as she never expected him to wipe her tears while he was so angry. "Tumhe baat karni hai na?" he asked slowly ignoring her shocked expression while she just nodded. 'Fine we will talk lekin pehle rona band karo, already bukhar baitha hua hai itna rogi to bad jayega aur ek baar davai khalo phir we will talk all you want okay?" she was going to retort but he just cut her short with a stern voice "And no arguments on this!" having no other choice she just nodded her head. He made her have the medicine and made sure that she had stopped crying after which the two of them sat in absolute silence with her resting her back on the headboard while he sat in front of her wondering how to begin. After a few minutes "Main jab us din police station gayi thi, tab mein ek akhri baar Pa..papa aur d..di se milna chahti thi" said Ridhima with a choked voice looking towards the ceiling. "Main bas janna chahti thi ki akhir kyu unhone aisa kiya, sirf Pison ke liye unhone itne saal mere emotions ke sath khela...I wanted answers Armaan, answers to those questions that have been haunting me since the day you told me I was adopted after the shootout, par pata hai Armaan us din mujhe jawab mile, us har sawal ka jawab mila" she said now looking at him, while Armaan stayed mum waiting for her to continue. "mujhe pata chala that I was really never good enough for them, us din jo batein un logo ne mujhse kahi..." she swallowed a lump while he clenched his fists remembering what they told her (he read it in the diary) "woh sunkar mujhe laga, ki it was me...I was never able to live up to their standards, tabhi to they did this right? That has to be the only reason right? Tabhi hospital mein bhi sab nurses aur ward boys ko bhi mein galat lagti hu...I must be wring right?" she said feeling all angry at herself while Armaan was angry at the damage done by Shahsank and Anjali and all those gossip mongers had he had his way he would have killed each one of them. "par pata hai Armaan what hurt the most, it hurt me the most when they said ki tum mujhe chod doge...Maine bohot samjhaya khudko kin nahi tum to mujhse bohot pyaar karte ho to how can you leave me, par phir bhi dar lag raha tha Armaan, bohot dar lag raha tha, pal pal mein us dar se mare jar ahi thi...and dekha jaye to bachpan se all those who I love have left me only na, first my birth parents, then smriti mom, then my so called father and sister...To tum bhi to ja sakte the na...isilye I tried being better, I tried to make myself "good enough" for you, par mein who bhi nahi kar payi...maine tumhe bhi naraz kar diya...ab tum bhi chale joge...sab ki tarah chod doge mujhe...and I'll be alone...I don't want to be alone...I don't want to be alone" she whispered the last bit as her tears betrayed her and rolled freely on her cheeks. Armaan's eyes too moistened seeing the amount of pain she had held in her delicate heart, not being able to hold himself any longer he finally took her in his arms where she cried hysterically. "Shh...bas..." he cooed caressing her hair as he himself tried to calm his heart that had suddenly become so restless. After what seemed like eternity she had finally calmed down a bit so he slightly parted from the hug and wiping her tears, then very gently he made her look at him "Ridhima look at me, aur men jo keh raha hu na use dhyan se suna Ridhima mein nahi janta ki Shashank Gupta ne jo kiya kyu kiya, but all I know is that jo bh hua usmein haar unki hui hai, tumhari nahi because he has lost a person like you...Ridhima you don't need to be better for anyone and mere liye to bilkul nahi,cuz if there is anything that's PERFECT in my life then that's you...Ridhima chahe kuch bhi ho jaye...I will never leave you, I CANNOT leave you baby...You're the reason I live tumhare bina mein jee kar kya karunga?" he asked softly seeing which her eyes welled up even more but this time seeing his undying love for her. "I am sorry Armaan, I am so sorry maine tumse yeh sab chupaya par mein bohot dar gayi thi mein..." "shh Ridhima yu don't need to explain anything main janta hu and I am sorry shayd maine kuch zyada hi react kar liya" he said cutting her apology midway itself. "Ridhima, baby I know yeh sab bhuna bohot difficult hai and its easier said than done but kya tum mujhse at least yeh to promise kar sakti hon a ki if there is something troubling you, or making you upset to tum mujhse ake share karogi, aise khud ko torture nahi karoge, aur ha chahe kuch ho jaye apni jaan dene ke bare main KABHI nahi sochogi, your life is very, very precious to me...samjhi? 'He scolded her lightly making her hug him as tight as possible.
Ho chandani jab tak raat deta hai har koi sath
Tum magar andheron mein na chhodna mera haath Jab koi baat bigad jaye
jab koi mushkil pad jaye Tum dena sath mera, o humnava
Na koi hai, na koi tha zindagi mein tumhare siva
Tum dena sath mera, o humnava
She sobbed in his neck but soon he heard her whisper a small "I promise" against his neck making him smile amidst his tears. He closed his eyes, wrapping his arms more tightly around Ridhima and promised himself that no matter what he would always be with her and give her all the love she deserves.
~END OF FLASHBACK~
Armaan came out of his thoughts when he felt Ridhima stir in hr sleep, instinctively his hand went to her head and he caressed it with all the love in the world. Life had not been very easy for them but just like Armaan had said together they coped with everything and today they were finally in a happy phase expecting their very first child together. Armaan smiled at that thought and as if on a reflex his other hand made its way to her tummy, bending down he kissed her tummy and whispered an "I love you" to the baby. Getting up he looked at Ridhima's face and could not help but fall in love with her all over again, she had a small smile adoring her lips, a smile for which he could give his all life for. He chuckled at how she felt he would leave her the silly girl really had no clue how much he loved her, "I love you meri jaan" he whsipered he vey softly pecked her lips and without any further ado he slipped inside the comforter and pulling her even closer drifted off to sleep to dream about their life which was no less than a perfectly "themed dream".
~THE END~
-Tanishka(Tani)
Edited by TaniDMGlover - 9 years ago
Health and Fitness
35