Posted: 8 years ago
Continuing on the last discussion..
What will II do with her own kids?
Can she differentiate between Akka's kids n her kids?
Her kids are like Nandu the rich Bhallas..
What she will do then?
Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by jairathore






              

Software Symphonies - Suggested read, watch and listen's

            

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Posted: 8 years ago
WWho knows how II will truly be when she has kids she will not be an extreme like a soap bahu or hateful like a soap vamp
Most of us are some where in between, some of us genuinely are able to be nice to kids on both sides, some find it difficult and let wealth and education and "phoren life" cloud our judgement
In our times living in big cities like Mumbai and Delhi got  our parents some subtle resentment from siblings that never left small towns

Nowadays its Australia or US or UK, siblings that live overseas their kids are looked at "differently" they are either "too artificially loved" or "hated for no reason" 

Some overseas couple overdo it also, by making their kids speak better Hindi or Tamil than their siblings' kids that live in Metros, and so the grandparents are in complete awe  "OMG!! They live in WISCONSIN and yet speak such great Tamil"

Such parents will constantly post YT videos of their young boys chanting Vishnu Sahasranamam and daughters doing a dance recital a week, while their cousins in Blore and Delhi would spend all their time playing video games

People that live overseas try to project this image of "subtle superiority" by making sure their kids are good in "phoren" and Desi stuff

Increasing the envy of siblings at home

Thats unacceptable behavior

Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by putti77


Continuing on the last discussion..
What will II do with her own kids?
Can she differentiate between Akka's kids n her kids?
Her kids are like Nandu the rich Bhallas..
What she will do then?

Khaali rich or poor se nahi hota...feelings se hota hai. If you have nurtured someone with love and care right from the beginning, worried for them, stayed up for them...you are more heavily invested in them emotionally. II is caring by nature but what she feels for SHRAVU she can't feel for NANDU, at least not now until she has spent considerable time with him. Then it is also about feeling entitled to love. She hasn't even accepted DUDes family as he very own fully how will she claim haq on NANDU. It will come slowly and steadily. In regards to her own kids, I am sure SAM will feel for RBs and II's kids what II feels for SHRAVU. 

Arey these relationship are so complicated and unfortunately peopl are constantly judging  everyone else purely by their actions and without any empathy...trying to understand what the other person might be feeling. That's why attempts are made especially by bahus to be extra nice to everyone on the in laws  side lest they are judged negatively. 
Posted: 8 years ago
II will most likely be extremely self conscious of her wealth. She is a genuine person. She wasnt looking to live a rich life or land a rich husband. So she will never let her wealth interfere in how her kids are "seen" by Shravu and Shatabdi
Sam is similar, despite being so wealthy, she doesnt want Vandu to "see" her as wealthy

It will be a struggle for II, she cant run away from her wealth, she has to eventually accept it, its going to hurt her a lot to see her kids gets things Akka struggles to provide Shravu and Shatabdi


Its not a 5 year old make believe game you know... where you say "OK I have 10 crayons, you only have 2, let me give you 4 so we both have 6"

YOU CANNOT DIVIDE YOUR WEALTH with your siblings how ever kind and compassionate you are

You cannot offer to pay for a new house or a new car or college

SOME siblings will be greedy and will hope... yes... most siblings will wont take any
Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by Nisha0604


WWho knows how II will truly be when she has kids she will not be an extreme like a soap bahu or hateful like a soap vamp
Most of us are some where in between, some of us genuinely are able to be nice to kids on both sides, some find it difficult and let wealth and education and "phoren life" cloud our judgement
In our times living in big cities like Mumbai and Delhi got  our parents some subtle resentment from siblings that never left small towns

Nowadays its Australia or US or UK, siblings that live overseas their kids are looked at "differently" they are either "too artificially loved" or "hated for no reason" 

Some overseas couple overdo it also, by making their kids speak better Hindi or Tamil than their siblings' kids that live in Metros, and so the grandparents are in complete awe  "OMG!! They live in WISCONSIN and yet speak such great Tamil"

Such parents will constantly post YT videos of their young boys chanting Vishnu Sahasranamam and daughters doing a dance recital a week, while their cousins in Blore and Delhi would spend all their time playing video games

People that live overseas try to project this image of "subtle superiority" by making sure their kids are good in "phoren" and Desi stuff

Increasing the envy of siblings at home

Thats unacceptable behavior



Oh god That's so true. There is this whole mandir/gurdwara clique here. If your children are not a part of hindi or Punjabi classes You are considered kids whose are rootless and on the other side, if they speak hindi and watch hindi films they are considered to be dippers. While visiting family in india, one on the one hand there is awe that they can speak hindi and know all about Ramyan  and Mahabharata on the other hand they are considered lesser human beings if they dotn put on an accent. What so this? Either this way or that way they are constantly judged. 
Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by taramira



Khaali rich or poor se nahi hota...feelings se hota hai. If you have nurtured someone with love and care right from the beginning, worried for them, stayed up for them...you are more heavily invested in them emotionally. II is caring by nature but what she feels for SHRAVU she can't feel for NANDU, at least not now until she has spent considerable time with him. Then it is also about feeling entitled to love. She hasn't even accepted DUDes family as he very own fully how will she claim haq on NANDU. It will come slowly and steadily. In regards to her own kids, I am sure SAM will feel for RBs and II's kids what II feels for SHRAVU. 

Arey these relationship are so complicated and unfortunately peopl are constantly judging  everyone else purely by their actions and without any empathy...trying to understand what the other person might be feeling. That's why attempts are made especially by bahus to be extra nice to everyone on the in laws  side lest they are judged negatively. 

II is ONE IN A BILLION fortunate Shru. TRULY Appa can hate Bhallas all he wants I dont give a rip
But I mean, she does what she wants, she has no responsibility, they dont expect sar par pallu, they dont expect chores, they dont take her money, her sister in alws have their own dramas happening so they dont bother her AT ALL. Her father in law is a peach. Most father in laws whose wife passes on are usually gentle giants... he is no different. Its women who are complete bitches

Ya feminists can clobber me I dont give a rip
In Tamil we say "Oru ponnoda vazhkaya kedukarde oru penn daan"

Only a woman destroys another woman's life. It happens frequently in joint family settings

Coming back, II is free to pursue a career, a family, help her parents financially, is allowed to be shallow and only shop or sleep or go to spas. Its a dream come tru for any middle class girl

Most spend 3 hours on a chartered bus and have cook two meals from scratch and haggle with hawkers and fill up water in pots of every sizes to fight water shortage, and run to the medical shop at 11 PM to buy "goodnight" to fight mosquitoes

II IS GODDAMN LUCKY!!

Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by taramira




Oh god That's so true. There is this whole mandir/gurdwara clique here. If your children are not a part of hindi or Punjabi classes You are considered kids whose are rootless and on the other side, if they speak hindi and watch hindi films they are considered to be dippers. While visiting family in india, one on the one hand there is awe that they can speak hindi and know all about Ramyan  and Mahabharata on the other hand they are considered lesser human beings if they dotn put on an accent. What so this? Either this way or that way they are constantly judged. 

Shru 
IYERS are the worst

Coz they consider themselves SUCH culture vultures😡. As if every home is going to produce a Chitra Visveshwaran ( a great dancer) or a Sudha Raghunathan. Parents that live here in my city are too bloody pretentious

Punjabis are more grounded there are no MS Subalakshmi or TN Krishnans to emulate.
Sundar Pichai  is an Iyer I can already see the 500k Iyers (most not all) getting a "cocaine fix" from Sundar's achievements and trying to somehow connect THEMSELVES to HIM

At the end of the day IT DOES NOT MATTER
You can kill yourself over a Ivy League school admission, when you turn 30 nobody gives a damn

Sure, an Ivy League school will yield $500 k a year for the rest of your life, Parents get bragging rights, as a child you get a couple divorces, a heart attack and cholesterol at the age of 35 and 26 out of 30 nights a month a hotel bed to sleep on

Its all so over rated



Edited by Nisha0604 - 8 years ago
Posted: 8 years ago
Originally posted by Nisha0604



II is ONE IN A BILLION fortunate Shru. TRULY Appa can hate Bhallas all he wants I dont give a rip
But I mean, she does what she wants, she has no responsibility, they dont expect sar par pallu, they dont expect chores, they dont take her money, her sister in alws have their own dramas happening so they dont bother her AT ALL. Her father in law is a peach. Most father in laws whose wife passes on are usually gentle giants... he is no different. Its women who are complete bitches

Ya feminists can clobber me I dont give a rip
In Tamil we say "Oru ponnoda vazhkaya kedukarde oru penn daan"

Only a woman destroys another woman's life. It happens frequently in joint family settings

Coming back, II is free to pursue a career, a family, help her parents financially, is allowed to be shallow and only shop or sleep or go to spas. Its a dream come tru for any middle class girl

Most spend 3 hours on a chartered bus and have cook two meals from scratch and haggle with hawkers and fill up water in pots of every sizes to fight water shortage, and run to the medical shop at 11 PM to buy "goodnight" to fight mosquitoes

II IS GODDAMN LUCKY!!


Yes she is extremely lucky. Amma realizes this but appa has his own Raag to alaapo. I sometimes think he does this so that there is some sort of level playing field between two daughters. It must hurt him to see  the  stark difference difference between his two daughters financial status and therefore in his head if he constantly reprimands RB and the bhallas, giving some grief to II, it will be equal compensation to Akkas grief stemming out  of financial woes. 
The web of feelings is so damn complicated and parents are extremely sensitive to what destiny has offered their kids. If II would have married Sree, it would be different because cultural similarity and same way of thinking, even though II could have been a bit more financially sound  would have erased a lot of angst appa feels for bhallas and Ii's choice. 

Posted: 8 years ago
It's okay
It's alright
If you're sad

It's okay
It's alright
If you're hurt

It's okay
It's alright
If you're heartbroken

It's okay
It's alright
If you're facing problems

It's okay
It's alright
If you've been fooled twice

It's okay
It's alright 
If things do not work as you planned

It's okay 
It's alright
'Cause thats what makes you alive
Edited by poetess - 8 years ago

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