GOODBYE - A RAMAN OS

Hello People

So am back with another piece of my work. Am actually very nervous posting this one as this is something I have never written. For starters, this is a SAD OS. So, if this news puts your mood in damper, you are more than welcome to ignore this post, I have done that many a times when am not in the mood to read anything sombre.

Next, ironically, the airport scene annoyed me and I was desperately struggling to write a confession vaala OS, a silent, subtle and private confession when this thought came into my mind. It has no relation whatsoever to the confession. Ironically, it is absolutely opposite to confession is all about parting ways in every sense possible.

I usually listen and recommend songs while reading any work of mine, however, with this I cannot associate any song, not even a sad one, because, honestly, I also did not know how will any person feel if he/she faces this kind of situation in life.

Anyway, the amount of blabbering above is nothing but my sheer nervous attempt to delay posting this for some more time as I am kind of very apprehensive about the response to this piece.

As always, please read and review and leave your comments, especially for this one as this is not at something I have worked on earlier and is way out of my comfort zone.

Cheers

Bhanu

GOOD BYE

He had read somewhere that human mind is the most complex thing in this world. He couldn't agree more to it given his present mental state at this point of time.

Sixteen years. Had it been that long, he wondered?

He was not sure how did he feel about it? He was shocked, he was sure. Was he sad or more so was he allowed to be sad? Did he have the right to be sad for her anymore? A silent pain in one corner of his heart seemed to mock his doubts openly.

He had assured himself time and again that he had moved on, although, deep down inside, he knew that years of drowning himself in endless alcohol and work post his divorce told a different tale altogether. But then, he had signed the divorce papers himself, didn't he? He wanted it after whatever had happened? It was the right thing.

Yet, this sudden news. It was as if his life took a sudden u turn and he was reminded of every good moment spent with her, some wonderful and beautiful memories, their memories, he recalled, till everything ended and the dream was broken.

He can never recall how he had reached the funeral home. It was as if he was pulled to the place by some unknown force and his feet automatically moved towards the funeral home. He had to see her ... one last time. He knew he had no right to. He knew he should not think like this, he knew he had lost all the rights years ago, albeit willingly after all the turmoil in their life. Yet, he had to go and say good bye to her for some unknown reason.

He did not miss the hushed whispers when his presence was felt in the funeral home. Oh, look who is here, her first husband. What is he doing here? Why is he here? Does he still love her? They had divorced years ago.

Ignoring everything, he silently moved towards where they had kept the body before she was moved to the pyre.

Ruhi was standing near Adi holding his hand in hers. Both the kids looked equally lost and seemed to gaze into nothing. Kids, He laughed. They were not kids anymore. Time had treated them well and while Adi was a handsome and tall boy of 21, Ruhi was a beautiful teenager of 16. They would have been proud parents of these two, had things not taken a worse turn, he thought.

He wondered at the change in circumstances. Adi and Ruhi holding hands and trying to console each other will be a rare occurrence few years ago, yet it seemed to be the most natural thing today. Time had healed everything. None of them knew when and how this sibling bond was eventually created and had become stronger over the years. In fact, all his family had lost every hope of any positivity in their relationship, except ... her.

"Give them time Raman. Adi will come around." She used to comfort him ... as always she was always right.

The siblings had suddenly changed behavior towards each other. What, how and when it happened was a mystery to everyone. But with time, Adi had silently accepted Ruhi and now they shared a special sibling bond.

His ex-wife's present husband was standing in another corner talking to the panditji who was instructing him about various ceremonies. She loved him with all her heart. The mere thought had killed him with jealousy once but how things changed.

Yet, his mind could not help but wonder that it could be him who would perform all her last rites as it was his right to do them. However now, he was no more than an unwelcome trouble of her past and a gossip column for the journalists who wanted to dig out a scoop out of his marital life one more time.

He silently moved towards her when her husband turned and looked at him. What followed was could be easily given the title of world's most awkward conversation without even a single word being exchanged. A million thoughts and emotions were exchanged in those brief moments when their eyes met.

And then, to his amazement, he felt a hand on his shoulder. It was him. He pressed it and then he moved out of his way; just like that. He was amazed at the irony of his situation. He had detested this man once when he imagined her with him, his blood use to boil at the mere thought of them being together, yet today, they were somehow strangely connected with him in grief as both of them had loved the same woman at one point of time.

She was adorning a red saree, a colour he loved to see her in while she was Mrs. Raman Kumar Bhalla, he almost wanted to laugh at the irony. The red vermilion she had her in forehead was of his name at one point of time. Her hands were full of red bangles. Playing with them was his favourite time pass. Her eyes though closed were as beautiful as always, full of kohl and the perfect mascara, she used to apply. How he wanted to be lost in her beautiful doe shaped eyes at one point of time. Yet, now, everything had ended. Over. In every sense.

Suddenly, everything was clear. He knew why he was here. What pushed him to come here and relive all his old memories of them, their togetherness, the love and care they had for each other at one point of time. The answer was right in front of him.

He had to do it. For him. For her. For the brief period of bliss and happiness they had shared together.

Just because, it had not ended in a happily ever after did never mean that it did not start with the thought of a happily ever after.

Therefore, with an air of finality, he went towards her, held her hand and whispered, while a lone tear finally escaped his eyes, "I forgive you for everything. Everything. Rest in Peace. Good Bye Shagun. "

THE END

Ok. Phew. If you have reached till this point, it means, you may have some questions.

Let me try and answer them as much as I can.

I made some assumptions.

1. Raman moved on in his life with Ishita. I purposefully did not touch his relationship status with her as this piece was about Raman and Shagun and not Raman and Ishita.

2. In fact, I kept her out of the entire scene. Honestly, am sure if something like this happens, a woman like Ishita will surely be there and I tried to put her in the scene but failed. So, I decided to ignore her presence as my main focus was on what did Raman think about this.

3. Blood is thicker than water. In our worst times, we may turn towards our loved ones, and our siblings as in my belief, we share the most special bond with your sibling, even more special than your parents. I have always wanted a good sibling relationship between the two, so you can easily call it my creative liberty but I made them patch up.

4. Yet again, I did not pursue the relationship progress between Ruhi and Adi on purpose. I tried, but felt that it takes away the essence of my story, Raman and Shagun.

5. In this work, I have taken the creative liberty of the fact that Shagun was married to Ashok. How, when, why does not matter. I just envisioned him in this scene and no other person came in my mind. So, I kept it as is.

6. Finally, the most important question which I had and am sure a lot of you will have, how will Raman react when Shagun dies or rather vice versa? In my POV(this is strictly my POV), when you start any relationship, you always want a happily ever after in it and you invest yourself in it. Whether, it takes a worse turn is another story. In my view, six years is a long time and both Raman and Shagun would at least have some moments which were theirs and there was love between them at one point of time. So, even if Raman hated her in the later part of his life and moved on with Ishita, a part of him will always cherish those brief moments, because he hated Shagun for what she did to him, he never hated the love he had for her. it was pure and honest. So, I personally think, that Raman will definitely mourn her death even if for a brief time, for the sake of the brief happiness they once shared.

You are allowed to disagree to what I thought. As I said, this is purely what I speculated. It totally depends on the individual.

Please leave your comments. They are valuable to the writer.

Cheers

Bhanu