Blame-game and hypocrisy!

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#91

@hooked, agree with your analysis except that Basant was not that innocent. If he only wanted a child - he should not have been the way he was with Gahna initially. I think he changed because of Badi masi - she guided him - I still remember the words - when Basant said usko (gahna) samjhaane ki bahut koshish ki , badi masi said usko samajhne ki koshish ki? (did you try to understand her?). Still Basant was no Ratan. Rat was truely a devil.

@Sidra - I fail to understand why we should make it like Sanchi vs Gahna vs Ganga vs other rape survivors? Laws are made on general basis and are applicable on each case irrespective of the details of individual cases. Like a person is killed by a single bullet that was fired at his heart - instant death while another person was killed with extreme brutality - but the law will award death penalty in both cases or may be in both cases the culprit will get only life sentence depending on whether the case comes under rarest of rare case or not. The accused will only get whatever maximum penalty is available in the law - it cannot be increased depending on the individual case. The law provides for maximum penalty of two years of jail for rape of wife - so that is what Rat would have got had he been reported at that time.

Unless the society bans child marriages, girls like Anandi, Phooli, Ganga etc. will suffer. Only remedy is to change the thinking of society. Even the available laws are not being applied strictly because of this tacit support of the society in the name of customs.

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ButterflyOnRose

@ButterflyOnRose

Sparkler

+ 2

Posted: 11 years ago

#92

Originally posted by: SPuja

@Sidra - I fail to understand why we should make it like Sanchi vs Gahna vs Ganga vs other rape survivors? Laws are made on general basis and are applicable on each case irrespective of the details of individual cases. Like a person is killed by a single bullet that was fired at his heart - instant death while another person was killed with extreme brutality - but the law will award death penalty in both cases or may be in both cases the culprit will get only life sentence depending on whether the case comes under rarest of rare case or not. The accused will only get whatever maximum penalty is available in the law - it cannot be increased depending on the individual case. The law provides for maximum penalty of two years of jail for rape of wife - so that is what Rat would have got had he been reported at that time.

Unless the society bans child marriages, girls like Anandi, Phooli, Ganga etc. will suffer. Only remedy is to change the thinking of society. Even the available laws are not being applied strictly because of this tacit support of the society in the name of customs.

@bold please before telling me this clear this i didn't start this i only participated in a conversation which was already started and i saw your comments where i disagreed so replied so no need to tell me this i am doing vs because i believe before my comment it was started by you and others?

I really fail to understand what you want to tell here Why are you explaining punishment cannot be increased decreased? 😲Did i ask this ? Where i said this ? This is not reply to my comment i only said correction in law is needed to be done so that women like Ganga who are also victims of physical assault their culprits can get severe punishment as well for the assault on them 2 years punishment is a joke Assaulting a kid and getting 2 years punishment because he was so called her husband Is this some joke

Law 's work is to make sure people get their rights and no one should violate them Thats why society made laws Child marriage is an illegal custom which needs to be stopped and its law's work to stop illegal acts The proper establishment of law can stop many such illegal acts This is what i said but you are totally telling something else to me 🤔anyways i am out of this debate now because you are not getting my point at all

Edited by sidra08 - 11 years ago

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#93

Originally posted by: sidra08
@bold please before telling me this clear this i didn't start this i only participated in a conversation which was already started and i saw your comments where i disagreed so replied so no need to tell me this i am doing vs because i believe before my comment it was started by you and others?
I really fail to understand what you want to tell here Why are you explaining punishment cannot be increased decreased? 😲Did i ask this ? Where i said this ? This is not reply to my comment i only said correction in law is needed to be done so that women like Ganga who are also victims of physical assault their culprits can get severe punishment as well for the assault on them 2 years punishment is a joke Assaulting a kid and getting 2 years punishment because he was so called her husband Is this some joke

Law 's work is to make sure people get their rights and no one should violate them Thats why society made laws Child marriage is an illegal custom which needs to be stopped and its law's work to stop illegal acts The proper establishment of law can stop many such illegal acts This is what i said but you are totally telling something else to me 🤔anyways i am out of this debate now because you are not getting my point at all

Page 6 of this thread tells how Ganga got involved in this.

My point is at blue above. I cannot say what was the meaning of anybody else's post, I can explain only what I said. Law cannot change the situation of the girls like Anandi, Phooli or Ganga - a change in thinking of society is needed. Law says child marriage is illegal, but with the approval of society child marriages are being done every year. As long as child marriages are here - there will be girls like Anandi, Phooli or Ganga suffering.

edited to add:

Sanchi's case is different because rape by husband and rape by someone other than husband cannot be equated. Had Bala succeeded in his bad intention, then we could compare Sanchi and Ganga.

Edited by SPuja - 11 years ago

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koolsadhu1000

@koolsadhu1000

Stunner

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#94

Sanchi's case is different because rape by husband and rape by someone other than husband cannot be equated. Had Bala succeeded in his bad intention, then we could compare Sanchi and Ganga.

Rape is an experience , a horrific one of forced sex . No legality can trivialise it or change it . The legalities only safeguard the doers , do not do anything to the experience . It remains the same .

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Colt.Pixy

@Colt.Pixy

Trailblazer

+ 5

Posted: 11 years ago

#95

Sanchi's case is different because rape by husband and rape by someone other than husband cannot be equated. Had Bala succeeded in his bad intention, then we could compare Sanchi and Ganga.

yes they are not comparable. because ganga passed to so much more turmoil than sanchi. sanchi is mature girl age wise when rape has taken place and she will come out soon from that shock with the help of mahan couple but ganga still had to suffer that thing she could not give born to other child happily . but sanchi got immediate treatment in hospital

sanchi selected saurav it was her choice to give him freedom so he would defo become opportunist just that they dint get married . but ganga dint choose rat as her husband and she was raped when she was child and she got abused number of times till she could get success to run from there. so rat was unknown for ganga but saurav was known for sanchi.

Edited by ZenerDiode - 11 years ago

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hooked

@hooked

Dazzler

Posted: 11 years ago

#96

When I said no body , not even Sanchi deserves to be raped - I meant that - even thought Sanchi was going down a slippery slope - I wud have been ok if she got rescued at the last minute and Anandi walking away with all the honours.

But to make the maali tell her what happened and use - the kasam - as a majboori for not being abnle to share info is stupid.

Then - going to meet Saurabh alone - is maha stupid. This news belonged to Shiv. He wud have done a background check and found out this guy is well connected but a wastrel and he wud have explained/warned Sanchi in his own way. Anandi cud have claimed innocence and Sanchi wudn't have known how Shiv knew.

Not sharing her dhamki to Saurabh with Shiv and Ira was wrong.

She shud have said right away - but Sanchi hates Payal since the case - U can call Payal and check if Sanchi is there. Right away - Ira wud have called up Sanchi on her mobile in the party and Sanchi wud have had to come home.

But NO - Ms. Anandi - knowing she is unwelcome - kept on trying to call Sanchi on her mobile and Sanchi - in her own twisted rage - cut off her nosy bhabhi's calls. BUT SANCHI WUD NOT , SHE WUD NEVER HAVE CUT OFF HER MOM'S CALLS. SANCHI COULD HAVE BEEN SAFE.

Anandi by her immense stupidity and even bigger ego - chose to take matters in her own hands and waited till it was too late.

Anandi is not an ideal bahu or an elder sister or a responsible person at all. She does not understand team work. She always likes to work alone without sharing any information, consulting anyone or getting resources.

Everything always has to be HER OWN WAY !!!

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#97

Originally posted by: koolsadhu1000
Sanchi's case is different because rape by husband and rape by someone other than husband cannot be equated. Had Bala succeeded in his bad intention, then we could compare Sanchi and Ganga.

Rape is an experience , a horrific one of forced sex . No legality can trivialise it or change it . The legalities only safeguard the doers , do not do anything to the experience . It remains the same .

Legalities is not for safeguarding the doers. It is all about punishment with reference to the offence. Rape is horrific, still there is difference between rape by husband and rape by any other person. It is like getting slapped by one's own parents and getting slapped by someone else. The pain remains the same but humiliation is manifold if it is someone else.

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hooked

@hooked

Dazzler

Posted: 11 years ago

#98

I still think THANK GOD Jagya chose to exercise his own logic and went and broke his engagement off with Sanchi's folks. Had he let Anandi waste the precious little time that was left - he wud have been married to that egotistical vain little gasbag and he'd have been totally miserable - and the Haveli wud have been even more upset.

Anandi never got to ruin Jagya's life and for that I am so grateful to the CV's to let Jagya walk away with his own independant decisions. He faced hell with both her and his own family - but see - he atleast did what he KNEW and FELT to be right.

She has Amol now - why does she have to run around everywhere like Ms. Bond and that too in her heavy jewellery and ghungat ?

Long skirts with kurtis and duppattas are in vogue and can be made to look very chic - why must we have to suffer Ms. Jhansi-ki-rani in her 100 yr old costumes ?

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SPuja

@SPuja

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#99

Originally posted by: ZenerDiode
Sanchi's case is different because rape by husband and rape by someone other than husband cannot be equated. Had Bala succeeded in his bad intention, then we could compare Sanchi and Ganga.

yes they are not comparable. because ganga passed to so much more turmoil than sanchi. sanchi is mature girl age wise when rape has taken place and she will come out soon from that shock with the help of mahan couple but ganga still had to suffer that thing she could not give born to other child happily . but sanchi got immediate treatment in hospital

sanchi selected saurav it was her choice to give him freedom so he would defo become opportunist just that they dint get married . but ganga dint choose rat as her husband and she was raped when she was child and she got abused number of times till she could get success to run from there. so rat was unknown for ganga but saurav was known for sanchi.

What I said earlier is not about the suffering, it was about what is the position of law and society with reference of these two cases. That is why I mentioned Bala incident. Physical relationship is an integral part of marriage - if the girl is married to someone, we can assume that there is physical relationship between the two - in smaller towns where they do not want to utter the 's' word - they say husband-wife relationship as an alternative. So, as soon as Ganga's marriage was fixed she knew what is going to happen - that is why the visuals that stirred all of us. But any other person - be it Saurabh the friend or Bala the helping friend is not supposed to do such a thing.

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Blame-game and hypocrisy! - Page 10

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