*From To Sathish* - Thread 3 - Page 115

Some of the songs from my new list


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slY3nagtNlY

A Ghost Story Dark Rooms - I Get Overwhelmed


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XgbBLKet14E

Simon & Garfunkel - Sound of Silence

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8ieDzdZ2-Q

Kings Of Leon - Closer

Jannal oram 86

"This is what we call love. When you are loved, you can do anything in creation. When you are loved, there's no need at all to understand what's happening, because everything happens within you.? Paulo Coelho

Raman followed the mortuary van at a safe distance and at the same time watched in sad fascination as the traffic parted before it like the sea that Moses had parted many thousands of years ago and soon they entered the rather large compound of the mylapore crematorium which funnily enough was situated in an area called Kailasapuram.

Raman parked his car close to the gate under a group of neem trees and walked quickly towards the vehicle to help bringing out the body from the van.But he did not have worry to much about for there was already a sub-inspector and a couple of constables who were ready and willing to serve for they had been sent by the very same Inspector who also had arranged for the cremation.

The crematorium staff,numbering five informed the cops not to worry and that they would do the needful and the three cops secretly heaving a sigh of relief stepped back and the sub inspector greeted raman and also told him that they would hang around until the end.

But Raman requested them not to waste their time and subtly gifting them a few 500 rs notes asked them to get on with their work and duty and that he would handle the rest by himself.

The sub-inspector requested raman to just make a courtesy call to their inspector and inform him of them being there and raman promised he would surely do that without fail and wished them well and bade them goodbye.

Then he turned and was stunned to see Jeeva standing there and both stood looking at each other,drinking each other and drowning themselves in the other.

Govind looked at raman and then seeing jeeva ' hi,what are you doing here,jeeva?' and Jeeva looked at him and then at raman ' well,i thought that my man and his friend would need my company while they sent this lady on her way to heaven.I am sorry and i hope i am not intruding.'

Govind ' Thank you jeeva.you truly are a kind and sweet lady' and then turning to raman ' ram,i will go in and get things started' and raman nodded and walked towards her,his lady.

' wow,this is a surprise.But how did you know that we are going to be here?' and jeeva with a smile ' well ,everything is online and registered and all you have to do is check for a few minutes and you get the information.Not many mrs.nirmala's who happened to die today and that too by suicide and it is already on google and chennai news online.'

Raman looked at her and started walking and mumbled 'any news and all news is news these days.from a cat stuck on a tree to a lonely lady dying,everything is news and food for the news hungry masses.'

Raman looked at her and gently took her hand in his ' In moments like this,i realise how precious you are an how lucky and privileged i am to have you in my life.'

The priest from the Arya samaj foundation was all ready and waiting and once raman and jeeva joined govind and him,he carefully placed a lot of herbs and then poured a packet of ghee all over the body and looked at all three who stood there ' The Antim Sanskar or Antyeshti is the 16th and the final vedic ritual to be performed to an Arya (Vedic Dharm Follower).

Though this ritual has no effect on afterlife of the dead person. But its the duty bestowed on his heirs and friends to duly perform this ritual.

The only way to dispose of a human body is to burn it with essential herbs and Ghee. '

The arya samaj priest began to chant from the vedas and soon that too was over and he looked at govind who in turn looked at the staff who were waiting to place the body in the tray and soon that too was done and it was sent on its way into a raging ball of fire.

The time was 6.30 p.m and all three sat with a gentle breeze flowing through the ornate designs of the cement walls of the crematorium and along with it the wind brought the sounds of crows cawing and calling to their nears and dears to get back home and find a branch to rest for the night,high and away from the reach of those pesky and stealthy cats.

An hour later,the staff member of the crematorium brought a small plastic cover full of ash and handed it over to govind who stood stunned and then nervously looked at raman ' raman,is that it.Is this small packet of ash the only remains of the poor lady?'

Raman throwing his arm around govind ' no,not this ash but the memories of her that remain in you,me and the rest of the world.Those are the true remains,the true legacy and they will go on and on.'

Raman drove the car to the nearby Marina beach and soon they immersed the ashes,the remains,the last of Mrs.Nirmala Venktadri into the salty waters and all three whispered a prayer for the woman's soul.

Although govind refused,Raman insisted that he would drop him back and after doing that dropped jeeva off near her house and she looked at him and then softly kissed his cheeks and brushed his lips softly with hers and wished him good night and raman promised he would see her tomorrow morning and drove off to his house.

Just as he stopped the car outside his gate,he saw his mother valliammai sitting near the entrance reading some tamil newspaper and then hearing his car,quickly got up and rushed to open the gate.

Raman drove into the compound and getting down flashed a loving smile to his mother who came to hug him but raman ' sorry amma,i am coming back from a funeral and so please don't touch me until i have finished bathing.'

Hearing no noise from inside the voice,he looked at his mother who smiled ' your dad has gone out with some friends and i think he will be a bit late in getting back.'

Raman looked at her ' mum,you have a wedding to go to tomorrow morning' and valliammai ' i know ram,but don't worry for i have warned him not to binge on his favourite scotch.Anyway,go finish your bath and let us eat for i am hungry and dinner is ready and steaming on the table.'

' amma,why did you have to trouble yourself when you could have simply ordered something.'

' no problem for i enjoy cooking for my son and my most favourite person in the world.'

Raman looked at her and then slowly leaned and pecked her forehead softly and whispered ' thank you ma'am.I will be ready and out in ten minutes.'

Life,this voyage that we are all on is a movie made up of thousands of scenes and in them small,fraction of shots,Montages that are filled with time capsules of timeless memories.

My memories of my mom sitting with a round vessel between her feet as she stirred and mixed the ragi dough,that steamed,slithered,stuck all around the vessel and then soon steaming Ragi mudhai's were ready for my dad and small,tiny golf ball size ragi balls or Kazhi urundais for me and carrying it in a small tumbler i used to sit near the front door of our house in the courtyard and that was my lunch and i ate them as the world passed me by.

Puri's with sugar is another favourite and my eyes and cheeks become like puri's as i
swallowed them and then complained that my tummy felt sick.

Curd rice with potato fry and see,these are the few of my favourite things and memories that i will most probably remember even if i am suffering from Alzheimer's.

Simple things,small things,beautiful petty things and these are the building blocks of life and also the very foundations of life.

In the end,what matters,what really matters are those kutty,precious seconds of life that make those damned painful decades worth living and surviving.

here is to the good,loving and sweet memories.

Redemption 219

A normal man should have died instantly the minute the knife entered his brain and yet Rudran stumbled out of the raging inferno that he had set ablaze and now with the large villa of som lal,the aviation ministers son burning and reaching the heavens with its flames,Rudran vanished and Bhairav came out for now both would depend on his brain to keep them alive.

The news that the ministers son's villa and estate in Shikarpur had been attacked was sent to the higher authorities a few minutes after Rudran had launched his attack and made good his escape into the forest as bhairav.

Major.param who was anxiously monitoring all the police conversations in and around shikarpur,picked up the news chatter that went back and forth and knew that everyone in the villa had been killed and yet he could no make any sense of some of the men screaming their heads off about a large leopard.

Major.Param sat back in his chair and wondered what they meant by a large leopard and then began to worry about Rudran for it was nearly 15 minutes since the attack had been reported and by now police commandos would be sent to the area to cordon it off and start the hunt for the attackers who had committed such a murderous act.

Major.param nervously ' come on rudy,come on man,get in touch please and make the call and tell us you are okay.'

Nearly half an hour passed by and major.param was reduced to a shivering bundle of nerves when his mobile rang announcing rudran's call and grabbing it,he yelled into it ' rudran,bloody hell man,what took you so long to get in touch? get going man without wasting any time for the police teams from all around delhi and UP will soon surround you and then it will be difficult to get out from there.'

There was silence,pin drop silence from rudran's side and major param felt the need to climb walls for time was just passing by and it was of utmost essence that he get rudran out of there and he called out to rudran ' rudy,boss.come on say something.please for gods sake ' and then major param felt a bolt of lightning strike his heart when a strange and rather rough voice mumbled ' rudy hurt.rudy needs help.please rudy hurt badly,come,come now.'

Major param sat transfixed on hearing the words and try as hard as he could he was not able to make any sense of the words he had just heard.More importantly,he could not recognise who had just spoken the words although it kind of vaguely sounded like rudran.

Pushing his chair away from the table,he took deep breaths and then reached for the white phone on the table and pressed the red button and waited as the intercom went " beep,beep,beep" and then after the third ring that was his boss Gen.Veer singh's habit,the handset was lifted and deep and cultivated voice spoke ' good evening major.param.You are still at the work station i see.'

Major.param ' good evening sir.Could you please come over to my cabin immediately ' and as was his character,gen.veer singh replied without any hesitation' i will be there in a moment.' and Major.param heard the handset being placed back in its cradle.

Two full minutes passed and for Major.param,every second of it felt like a year and then hearing the cabin open,he sprang to his feet and saluted as the large,imposing and regal form of Ge.veer singh filled the cabin and he nodded ' at ease param and tell me what has scared the living daylights out of you.'

Major.param composing himself looked at gen.veer ' sir,it is Rudran sir and he is there in shikarpur' and immediately gen.veer singh ' the minister's sons villa which has been attacked and is on fire and many dead.You mean that is the work of rudran.But on whose authority for i did not sanction this mission.'

Major.param nervously ' sir,the prime minister himself sanctioned this mission and Rudran told me to hold on before informing you and that he would do it personally after he returned from the mission.'

Gen.veer singh deciding that protocols and formalities would and should wait ' okay.so what is the problem,param?'

' sir,rudran hasn't gotten in touch and it is now nearly half an hour since the attack and the whole area is crawling with police and other special forces an they will be launching a complete search of the area.'

gen.veer singh was puzzled and the worry clearly reflected in his eyes for rudran was like his very own son and then he looked up as major.param continued ' sir,there is something else sir.Somebody called from rudran's mobile but i don't think it was rudran sir.'

Gen.veer singh nearly jumped out of his skin ' you mean rudran is hurt or captured and somebody called from his mobile.But that handset is encrypted and can be activated only by him.'

Major.param bent over the key board and played the recorded conversation that he had had with rudran just a few minutes ago.

In the small cabin,both gen.veer and major.param heard a deep and rather scary voice mumble ' rudy hurt.rudy needs help.please rudy hurt badly,come,come now.'

Jannal oram 87

Vir sapit qui pauca loquitur "That man is wise who talks little.

Raman stripped off his clothes but could not strip himself off the day's happenings.Turning the shower to full blast,he stood with his face turned to the downpour and the cold water shocked him breathless and remained under the water for a full minute and then slowly turned the knob and stood dripping water as the days events washed over him.Beginning from morning,with his dad confiding about his love and his mother standing in the bedroom door and then govind,the late Mrs.nirmala and her funeral,raman shook his head and wondered if this was normal or if there was a higher gear to his life wherein he would experience more than what he had seen and felt that day.

Slipping into a track pant and pulling on a tee that was frayed at the edges and had small holes showing signs of wear and tear,raman came out and pulling a chair sat at the dining table.

His mother valliammai looked at him ' nothing major ram,just chappati's,a vegetable curry and a fresh salad with colored capsicum' and raman smiling ' amma,anything is okay and more than food i am happy to be here with you and that too after the roller coaster day that me and govind experienced,just seeing your face and feeling your love is food enough and good enough for me.'

' why raman? what happened today?' and raman explained to his mother the whole set of events and valliammai suddenly burst out in tears ' oh god,that poor woman.God knows how sad and lonely she must have felt to have taken the decision to kill herself.'

Raman silently cursed himself for having revealed such disturbing news to his mother and vowed never ever to do that and sat seeing his reflection that shimmered on the shiny steel plate,wondering what to do and how to console himself and just when he was thinking about getting up and going to his mum,she looked up wiping her tears ' raman,do you remember today morning when i stood and remained silent while your dad confided in you about his first love.'

Raman suddenly felt very uncomfortable and also at the same time overwhelmed by everything and with a sad expression ' amma,please.you don't have to explain anything to me for it is all done and dusted over and it is in the distant past.'

Valliammai smiling ' i know ram but the reason i wanted to talk to you about that was to simply show you what a great and kind man your dad is for if he had wanted,he could have easily behaved in the same evil and callous way that the late mrs.nirmalas husband did when he divorced her at that old age.But your dad locked everything away and began a new and beautiful love story with me in it and i will be eternally grateful to him and his love.'

Raman looked at his mother ' so you have known.you were aware that he had loved someone else and yet you carried this with you just like he did and for so many years.'

Taking a spoonful of salad,raman looked at his mother ' wow,this is truly a great and endearing story that has been written between you and appa.Awesome amma.'

Chewing on the salad ' but amma,tell me something,did you never,ever feel insecure or threatened by the presence of Caroline miss after you realised that she still had feelings for your husband,i mean dad.'

Valliammai shook her head and taking a second to think,recollect,she looked at raman ' honestly,i am still in awe as to how she has remained unmarried,untarnished and has gone about her work and life with a single minded purpose of discipline.What ever insecurities or threat that i felt in the beginning soon vanished and was replaced with grudging admiration for her and your dad for their control,their character and ethics.'

Looking at her son,' ram,i see a lot of that and more of that in you my son.The same code of conduct,self respect and strong unwavering character that fills your dad fills you too and i am proud of you for the way you are leading your life.'

Raman placing the table spoon back on his plate ' mum,i am filled with both of you and your soul and strength and considering the facts,i as an advocate of the law judge you to be the stronger one and also the wiser one among all the others in the story or rather this case.'

Mother and son looked at each other and nodded their recognition of the love they had for each other and then through the open door,both heard the clang of the gate as it was opened and moments later,the sweet voice of Jeeva drifted to them ' hello,hi everyone' and both of them looked up in gentle surprise and then jeeva came to the dining table and softly placed a small tupperware and announced ' amma made semiya payasam and wanted to share it with you folks too.'

Valliammai stood up and gently hugged jeeva ' sit sweetie,have you had your dinner yet?' and jeeva looking at raman ' no,not yet for my mother insisted that i come and hand over the dessert to our majesty here and then have my dinner.'

' no problem,there is enough food for all of us and it would make us very happy if you could join us and eat with us.'

Jeeva ' don't worry ma'am,i have no problems with food and i never,ever feel shy to show my hunger around good food and good people.'

Raman stared at her for a second and jeeva with a twinkle ' don't worry advocate,i will not touch the payasam for it is only for you and your folks and there is a bucket full at home and i am going to spend the whole night finishing it.'

Raman smiled and then his mother joined him and soon all their smiles and the sounds of their happiness lifted the gloom and tragedy of the late Mrs.nirmala who must have felt peace for in her final moments,pure,loving and kind people had wished her goodbye and sent her home on her final voyage into the safekeeping of her god.

Redemption 220

Every country has one or many intelligence agencies to support its governance. The primary purpose of the agencies is to collect, study and exploit information to protect the country's law enforcement, foreign policies, national security and military. The missions conducted by such agencies include both overt and covert operations. These missions often take place in front of public, however, due to stealth these operations go completely unnoticed.

Modes of operation such as espionage, crypt analysis, communication interception, evaluation of public sources and collaboration with other intelligence agencies are followed to pinpoint any national threat. In the wake of war against terrorism and other anti-social activities, the Indian intelligence agencies have improved its strength. Over the years, the Government of India has formed several intelligence agencies to counter injustice.

The biggest headache in the field of Intelligence and defence is co-ordination and Ego.Yes,Egos of the bureaucrats who head the various Intelligence departments have many a time caused costly delays that have resulted in many loss of lives and casualities in overt and covert missions.

The general population are totally unaware of what their protectors and defenders are doing at any given time and so most of the television and newspaper crowd avoid talking,discussing or even speculating about their respective Intelligence factions.

Chakravyuh,was the child of Gen.veer singh and it was run under the sanction of the Prime minister himself and it worked outside the parameters of the various other agencies and this enabled it to work and strike quickly at enemies that the team thought posed a danger to the nation.

Rudran had been personally handpicked for his incredible brain and also for his near superhuman powers and he was the personal favourite of the prime minister and gen.veer singh himself.They and the entire team of Chakravyuh absolutely adored and respected Rudran for the man he was and the hero he truly was and had proved on many occasions.


And now hearing the words of someone growling,telling him that Rudran was hurt and maybe dying,sent tremors of shock and pain through both gen.veer singh and major.param.

Taking a moment to digest all that was happening,Gen.veer singh asked major.param to call rudran on his mobile and after a many frustrating rings,it was finally answered by the same growling voice ' please,rudran needs your help.I am unable to help him and you need to get here as quickly as possible.'

Gen.veer singh,paused for a fleeting second ' could you please tell us who you are and how is that you are near Rudran.Please,we need more information on what is happening to rudran and around that area.'

The man spoke,a bit slower and more clearer and both the men in the cabin realised that his speech was getting better,clearer and he was using more words,rather than Rudy hurt,rudy need help.'

They stood hearing the voice ' There is not much i can tell you except that Rudran has a knife embedded in his skull and he is unconscious but alive.I will try my best to keep him safe but he needs surgery and immediate medical attention.'

Gen.veer singh felt a bit of relief hearing the man speak calmly and intelligently and then asked the million dollar question ' sir,you still haven't told us who you are and what you are doing there with Rudran.'

In the depths of the darkness of the forest in shikarpur,Bhairav spoke ' I am the one who watches over him.Then,now and forever.'

Both gen and major looked at each other in total confusion and then major.param slowly and carefully picked his words and conveyed the situation to the stranger ' sir,you have our thanks and eternal gratitude for saving our man's life.Now,please listen carefully and follow my instructions for both your lives depend on it at this very moment.'

The man growled ' I will kill and destroy everything that approaches rudran.nothing or no one will be spared as i stand watch over my rudy.'


Gen.veer singh loudly and with frustration ' mister,we want the same damn thing that you want for rudran.Now please will you follow our instructions.'

' okay.please go on.'

Major.param looked at the large monitors that were receiving the satellite images of shikarpur and then spoke into the phone ' There are hundreds of armed policemen who have begun to enter the forest in pursuit of Rudran and you need to carry him away to a safer place before they reach you.'

major.param looked at the GPS signal that rudran's phone was emitting and continued on the phone ' just stay in the forest and follow the narrow patch of greenery and soon you will out of shikarpur and then we will send a helicopter to pick up rudran and maybe you too,for we need to debrief you.Have you understood everything that i just told you.Please say yes if you have done so.'


In the darkness of shikarpur,Bhairav looked at Buddha the leopard ' is this the same way you came to help rudran' and the leopard growled a yes and bhairav spoke on the phone ' okay,i think we can manage that and we will see you soon at the point where you are picking us up.'


Gen.veer singh looked at Major.param ' who did that stranger speak to and what was that growl i just heard' and major.param shrugging his shoulders ' weird sir and i am as confused and lost as you are.'

The nation wants to know


"Popular culture is a place where pity is called compassion, flattery is called love, propaganda is called knowledge, tension is called peace, gossip is called news, and auto-tune is called singing.


Arnab goswami,screamed,bawled,yelled,swaggered,threatened,pleaded ' the nations wants to know,the nation demands an answer' and today with that slogan,republic tv split from Times of India and looks like it has carved a large pie for itself.


Today,during dinner,my wife subtly forces me to watch Arnab on Republic tv,Ashoka varshini or pandey on Thanthi tv and all i ever hear is arnab's yells,squeals,squeaks and on thanthi tv all i ever hear is " amma this,amma that or chinnamma this or chinnamma that" and now my favourite actor Kamal hassan is beating his chest and proclaiming politics.

Me secretly thinks that all the humpings,pumpings he did and all those abortions he forced on his wife,who boldly revealed them along with many other dirty secrets are going to come back and take a huge bite of his paramakudi bum.He is going to regret all those opinions of his that he revealed long back on tv,such as he does not believe in the system of marriage and that he has a weakness for older women( yes,my lovelies,he said this on jaya tv)and i guess he will regret a lot of other things.

My only question to kamal hassan is ' sir,you cannot manage your personal life and cannot remain faithful to the one you loved and married.Then how the heck are you going to be honest and faithful to the people who you want to lead towards a better future.And sir,please,can you stop using words from the webster dictionary and talk english please,simple english.Or forget it just talk sense for your thoughts are like your movies,profoundly confusing and so like all those abstract paintings.looks good but kind of hard to understand.'


But coming back to television,I was boringly swtiching channels and lo and behold,there was hrithik roshan sitting opposite Arnab goswami and answering questions about his affair with Kangana ranaut.

Romba thevai engalukku,Intha naatukku.My eyes opened wide as i anticipated Arnab to scream ' the nation wants to know,if you humped kangana or not and how many times and how many different ways.' Sadly,thankfully,Arnab was meek,tender and loving with hrithik who was timid and with his timid voice squeaked ' i did not,i repeat i did not have an affair with kangana' and it so reminded me of clinton saying ' i did not do that with monica in the oval office.I repeat,i did not get a blow job from monica lewinsky ' and well you know how the story went.


I kept wondering how hrithik and kangana were relevant to the nation and how the hell it matters to what they did with their bodies for it is so f**king clear that he humped her,ditched her and now is understanding the meaning of "hell hath nor fury like a woman scorned."


October 2nd just went by and gandhi was bathed,varnished or glossed over for the corrupt and shit politicians to come and garland him and you should have seen the expressions of each of the politician and govt official as the humbly bent and paid their respects.God,the late nadigar thilagam would have screamed in pride and yelled ' bravo,bravo' at their sterling performances and expressions.

The nation is in transition and at a cross road and all the news channels and news papers are reporting is useless,trivial sex and affairs between actors and actresses.

Why,simply because of ratings and the ad revenue it brings.So,in the end,news has become like tv serial and their TRP'S for every tv channel worth its salt is blasting us with information of their market share and value and how big a slice of pie they have.

So,it's back to vadivelu and his comedy in siripoli and aditya channels and i leave the breaking news to the hordes of wh**es and bores and their hoarse screams of ratings and fakings.

All channels are filled with panels who seem to be experts on everything and today those who scream the loudest are the most popular and whose opinions make,shake and break and importantly mould the public's mindset.


I think India as a nation deserves these wh**es of news and breaking news and the people who pay to sleep with them,sorry watch them.

through the prism

I sat by the stream,my legs dangling in the cool,gurgling waters and they swirled around my feet and then of they went,where ever they were flowing to and i continued to sit,splashing my feet in the water and then a bird,a crow squawked and i looked up as a single leaf floated down,moving to and fro,gliding gently,twisting like a ballet dancer and like a plane,it landed without a ripple on the water and then caught in the flow it drifted past and i thought i could hear its voice as it looked at the mother tree and all the other uncle and aunty trees and whispered ' yippee,yeah you leaves,here i go,far,far away on new adventures and off to foreign lands and waters.Bye,bye,'


I waved my hands and yelled ' bon voyage,leaf,' and i sat under the tree as over the hours,many more,lots more leaves packed their bags and drifted down on the waters of the stream and yet many floated down and made a bed and pillow for me and i lay myself and looked at the dancing sun as it danced around the branches,white,bright,gold and warm and there i slumbered with my feet in the water and face in the light and body in the leaves.I felt the beat of the earth,its metal heart growling as it burped a volcano here and there and snored an earthquake far away.

The tree spread its roots and they tickled me with their tender shoots and i said ' please,i am so comfortable,do go around me without having to force me,rouse me from my numb slumber.' The roots sniggered ' lazy,so wannabe poet and earth wanderer and full of bull shit.'

Jannal oram 88


"When you do things from your soul, you feel a river moving in you, a joy. Jalaluddin Rumi

It was 6.00 am and jeeva's phone vibrated and moved around the bed under her pillow and still neither awake nor asleep but comfortable in her dream with raman,she reached for her mobile and in the dark of the room,the large samsung galaxy screen,screamed ' raman,raman' and smiling,heart beating faster and a current passing all through her body,she swiped the screen and placing the mobile to her ear,softly whispered ' hi sweetie' and raman ' apart from my mum,you are the only one who has ever addressed me or greeted me using the word sweetie.'

Jeeva stayed quiet for a moment ' well,in time,i will be more of a mother and a father to you than a wife and yes,i will remain that too and much more.'

Raman wanted to say so much,but in the end as was his nature ' wow.thank you for that and i wish you a very,very good morning.'

Jeeva ' well,my man,my hero,i thank you too for making me feel all this and being a part of my life and letting me be a part of your life.So,again,thank you and a very good morning to you also.'

Both stayed quiet,enjoying the silence for even the silence spoke volumes of what they felt for each other and then raman with a slightly shaky voice ' jeeva,i might not show it,but like you and like all others,i too worry about life and its twists and turns and sometimes scare myself silly wondering and imagining what is around the corner and what each day will bring for us and our families.'

She stayed quiet and then for the first time in their brief relationship,she heard the young boy,the tiny scared voice in his rather serious and brave nature and her heart skipped a beat and she whispered ' nothing will hurt you and i will not let anything or anyone hurt you.Not as long as there is breath in me and now as long as i stand besides you.Life can be twisted and sometimes tragic but i think together we can beat the odds and live our lives as we deserve it.'

Suddenly,jeeva confessed to him ' hey ram,promise me you will not laugh and i will tell you what i was dreaming about just when you called me' and raman ' i promise' and jeeva ' it is the same dream,i have everyday and one which i wake up everyday and the same dream that i start my morning and it keeps me going through out the whole day.'

Raman ' okay,i will bite for it looks like you are dreaming something awesome.so no more suspense and out with your dream' and jeeva with a tinkle of a chuckle ' i wake up each day dreaming us both naked and you buried deep inside of me and we are far,far away in our own land,in our very own kingdom and we never wear clothes.we make love when we want to and we bathe in all the sweet rivers and lakes around and life is just beautiful.'

Raman sighing heavily ' Awesome,now that is a truly awesome dream to wake up to and think about the whole day.'

Then softly ' why did you think i would laugh at your dream,when it is the same dream that i too have,want and need?' and jeeva replied ' as a woman and that too an Indian woman,i sometimes wonder about men and their thoughts and beliefs although you dont fall into any stereotype of the typical indian,i do worry that i might hurt your sentiments by being too open,frank and casual with my thoughts.'


' well,my beautiful woman,you never have to worry about holding back with me and please stop torturing yourself with stereotypes for i am yours and yours to do anything as you please or so desire.And about us both and our needs and desires,maybe we must rethink our plans for i doubt if we can both wait until your sister gets married.'

Blushing,jeeva ' yes sir,i was thinking on the same lines but like you said,it will happen when it will happen and then we will let it happen and go with the flow.'

' okay advocate sir,i need to get up and i will see you at the bus stop at 8.00 am.'

Raman with a slight sadness filling his voice ' well jeeva,that is why i called you right now and i wanted to tell you that i will not be meeting you at the bus stop for i am planning to go along with my parents for the wedding.'

Jeeva ' okay,but i thought you were not interested in attending the wedding' and raman ' yes,but i changed my mind when i thought hard about it and realised that life is not only about what i want or desire but also making time and allowances for those we care and love deeply.I thought i would surprise my parents and i am sure they will feel really happy to know that i am going along with them for the wedding.In reality,i spend such little time with them and i see so little of them and they are getting older by the day and this tiny gestures are the only way i can repay their love and affection and all that they have done for me.'


Jeeva's eyes filled with tears ' lovely,now i know why you were named raman for like the raman,the hero of ramayana,you too are truly a great son,friend and lover.Hopefully,we can catch up at lunch or meet up in the evening if it is possible for i will not last a whole day without seeing you or kissing you.okay boss.'

Raman lovingly ' okay dee,en chellam.Have a great day and i will see you soon.bye baby.I love you so much.'


"When I am with you, we stay up all night.
When you're not here, I can't go to sleep.
Praise God for those two insomnias!
And the difference between them.
Jalaluddin Rumi

Jannal oram 89

Raman quickly shaved,showered and then stood staring at his wardrobe wondering what to wear for the wedding.With a smile,he decided and tradition won over and reaching for the brand new dhotis gifted over the years by his mum and dad,he picked one out with a blue border and picked out a navy blue shirt and a dab of deodorant under his arm pits,he exited his bedroom and found his mum and dad were just about to leave for the wedding.

Shaktivel and valliammai looked at their son and raman nodded ' yes,folks i am coming with you and i will stay until it is done and until you request me to bring you back home.'

His dad looked at him,his face beaming with joy and pride and then ' Iyya,please don't force yourself .It is okay,if you have work for that is more important than this marriage and more over,i don't think you have met anyone from this distantly related family .'

Raman ' dad,it is okay and no,i don't have anything on my plate today and i will be going to the office later in the afternoon to meet my boss regarding work.But until then i am your designated driver and security and i hope that is okay.'

Valliammai came near her son and taking drishti,cracked her knuckles loudly and cursed all the evil and jealous eyes that fell on her son and father and son who absolutely had no belief in such superstition,smiled and indulged her.

Valliamma filled her eyes with her only son ' you looks so good and handsome in a veshti' and then hurriedly ' it is not the velcro or new age veshti with belt and stuff,no.'

Raman ' amma,that is for lazy people or those who don't know how to wear or wrap one around their body.Not me for i have my dad who taught me well and moreover it is not some extreme science or does not require major IQ levels to learn how to wear a veshti.'

Shaktivel in a very somber and sober voice ' iyaa,raman,then why are all this ads from ramraj,minister white beating their chests with velcro style veshtis.Is velcro too now a part of our culture.I feel so clueless about clothes and fashion off late and i am totally comfortable with my usual attire of pant,veshtis and shirts.'

Suddenly valliammai burst out laughing and father and son looked at mother and wife and she in turn looked at them ' sorry,but i just remembered seeing our old neighbour wearing half pants with floral designs to the temple and he is as old as your dad and everyone in the temple were laughing their guts out.'

Raman hugging her gently ' chellam,it is each and every individual's right to choose and wear what he likes and there is pretty much nothing anyone can do about it,not even in trichy or madurai.Brands,fashion trends are here to stay and they will remain as long as tv channels keep reminding us that we are nobodies if we don't happen to shop here in this popular shop or if we don't pledge gold in this popular bank.'

Then looking at his watch,he looked at both of them ' it is nearly 7.30 am and any idea where and when we are supposed to be present for the wedding since traffic will get heavy as time goes by.'

Shaktivel looked at his son ' iyya, i have already booked a sedan through uber and it is waiting for us' and then looking at the wedding invitation ' the venue is Rani Meyammai Hall,Egmore and the muhurtham time is between 8.00 am and 9.00 am.'

Raman ' egmore,then it is okay appa for we have enough time to be there and as is the norm,the muhurtham will be delayed until the last moment and so we can reach the venue comfortably.'

Just as the Uber sedan, a maruti swift dezire left his area,Raman's eyes searched for Jeeva at the bus stop and felt a twinge of disappointment for not being able to see her.

But his dad,a shrewd and observant man,turned to raman who was in the back seat ' Iyya,is that the bus stop you used before switching back to driving your car?'. Hearing the question,valliammai immediately turned and searched for someone or something and raman folding his hands in a namaskaram ' podhum,enough of demonstrating both your detective powers and sorry,for jeeva was not there in the bus stand and her usual time to reach it is 8.00 am and it is only 7.50 am.'

Both his parents exchanged glances and then raman's dad with a twinkle in his eye and a tinkle in his voice ' Somebody seems to be a bit disappointed and irritated today morning' and valliammai ' hey shaktivel,ennapa,why are you bullying my child?'

Raman looked at his dad who in turn looked at the driver who seemed to be confused about their whole dynamics and relationships and whispered ' she is not my wife,but more like sornakka from the film Dhool.'

The driver instantly took a look in the rear view mirror at valliammai and began to drive with total concentration and with a single minded purpose to reach the destination as quickly as possible and to be rid of all three of them.