Is Gunjan's behaviour Normal? - Page 5

I must admit that from beginning I am unable to understand gunjan completely..though I adore her her...
Actually I have seen death in close family friends in a similar situation... but not seen such reactions..
Normally people do not blame anyone for death...I think the gunjan part is poorly scripted...
Gunjan bottling up her sorrow is still ok for me...even moving away from Samrat..but blaming him is unnatural...normally does not happen...

They are not giving the required depth to her feelings and her behavior is my POV

Originally posted by: utfracks

I understand what Gunjan is going through. Well, but same applies to Mayank doesn't it? When he's finally learnt to accept that Nupur is no more, he's again being reminded of Nupur. sometimes, if there are two contradictory things going on, it can affect the mental stability of a person. If Gunjan is in a position to help out Mayank in coping with life, sure she should also be in a position to know what's right and what's wrong.

No... She's actually not in a position to differentiate between right and wrong, and the major proof is that she blames Samrat for what happened. Ash's loss doesn't affect her, and hence she is in a position to guide her. But Mayank's loss is also her loss, and probably even bigger than his. She's trying to help him cope in life, but she really isn't sure that what she's doing may hurt Mayank cause it would remind him of Nupur. Nobody's consoled her, even despite losing the most precious person in her life, and she's in no condition herself to know exactly how she should help Mayank, cause she needs help herself right now.

Originally posted by: DiyaS

actually, utfracks ... we're saying exactly the same thing 😛 ... what Gunjan IS doing ... and what she SHOULD be doing (or what you expected her to do) ... these are two completely different things ... and that's where the whole problem arises!!!! Because i agree with you that she's going wrong ... that's the whole point!!! She is reacting badly ... very badly ... to the death of someone who was sister, mother-figure and her closest friend ... I'm finding an explanation for her behaviour, but I'm not saying it's correct at all ... She's trying her best, but she is not succeeding, because the way she's trying is all wrong.
We're just looking at it from two different viewpoints!

Anyway, good to have a healthy discussion for once on this forum ... 😉

@Red- I completely agree.

Also to the fact that we're speaking through two different viewpoints. I'm speaking from a Mayurian pov, while you're speaking from a sajanian pov. So that's just the difference in how we perceive things to be.

Originally posted by: utfracks

@Mads- And I'm doing the second. So I guess, difference in preception and opinion.

yup, like I said before! 😆😳 dont u hav to rush for ur admissions?? 😆

--EDIT--

I m not shoving u off..LOL, jus tht I kno how addictive IF and discussions at IF can be .. 😉 and the admission procedures in India are masha allah! 😆

Originally posted by: aa123.80

No... She's actually not in a position to differentiate between right and wrong, and the major proof is that she blames Samrat for what happened. Ash's loss doesn't affect her, and hence she is in a position to guide her. But Mayank's loss is also her loss, and probably even bigger than his. She's trying to help him cope in life, but she really isn't sure that what she's doing may hurt Mayank cause it would remind him of Nupur. Nobody's consoled her, even despite losing the most precious person in her life, and she's in no condition herself to know exactly how she should help Mayank, cause she needs help herself right now.

I do not completely agree to that. She is herself with everyone, but only when she's with Mayank she's like Nupur. and I'm NOT talking of Majan angle here. It just seems completely double standards to me. And if she needs help, I don't understand why she FEELS she has to be strong for Mayank, when in actuality, she doesn't need to.

Originally posted by: mads

yup, like I said before! 😆😳 dont u hav to rush for ur admissions?? 😆

--EDIT--

I m not shoving u off..LOL, jus tht I kno how addictive IF and discussions at IF can be .. 😉 and the admission procedures in India are masha allah! 😆

Oh yeah. Admissions in India are terrible🤢 Better be off now😆

Originally posted by: DiyaS

Which was why that scene of Sam seeing Gunjan last night made sense to me (belatedly 😉) ... he wasn't seeing Gunjan in Ash ... he was just seeing Gunjan ... his Chashmish, and what she would say to him, ... and that stopped him from breaking down ... he was able to get up and leave quietly without any more fuss or tears ... so maybe ... just maybe ... that's a start ...

I thought of EXACTLY the same thing diya .. the fact that he sees gunjan saying all those things to him, and that he went off from ther later on..that definitely seemed to be the start for me too ..

although I guess today's epi wud make it more clear ..

wow quite a discussion going on in here so gals allow me to add my 2 cents 😳😳

as i see actually we all agree on 1 thing that gunjan should stop doing this .. living in denial basically

she is and has always been very stubborn esp when it comes to her loved ones and the most closest to her in her life have been samrat and nupur - she didnt even hesitate fighting with nupur for Samrat - post her roshni se date twice - once in his farmhouse and next day in the library - cause she knew the truth - however here she doesnt even wanna accept it

as malli aka yashi rightly said in the paralytic track she was all smiles in front of the gang she remains the same today in front of mayu... she is trying to be his rock thinking he needs her support which is true but the fact is she is not seeing the damage that her help is equally doing to all 3 actually

rem the chaiwalla scene in the paralytic track she said she doesnt need him yet he found a way to help her by doing the genie act.. it also had a small moment ... the one where as soon as he glasses fogged up she called sam instantly...

that part of her knows... she needs him .. no matter what he can solve all her problems whether or not she asks him ... i also rem Sam having this FB of her last night as he drank - whenever i needed u .. u helped me somehow - in another chaiwalla scene on vday

she knows sam is the only one who can get through to her and so she is running from him trying to forget herself entirely - like Sam she is suffering from the most severe kind of survivor's guilt actually - i think she believes the life she is living was meant to be of her di's

but what makes her case worse is her not acknowledging the truth is not only making things stop in her life but also Samrat and Mayu...

Sam as not only without her is he lonely - but also as he thinks he is guilty - added to which the absence of Gunjan and Mayank in his life - who he considers family makes him wanna punish himself even more as he feels their leaving him didnt even give him a chance to regret and repent

like Sam said to gunji dard baatne se kam hota hai - he feels he shd have been there for them as family but it didnt happen

mayank as - thou he is shown now finally acknowledging his feelings - his affection for Sammy that at moments makes him , his heart melt - thinking of Gunjan he stops in his tracks and doesnt take that much needed step

atm Sammy is in terrible shape agree but the fact is he is actually more controlled and also stronger frankly to me amidst the 3 ... cause he has shown the courage the most early amongst the 3 - that of returning to excel - facing his past - the other 2 need him as well as he needs them to - cause his problem is to get rid of his burden - be guilt-free ; which can happen only when the other 2 forgive him but - they need him to come terms to reality - which he has done - when he said to ash accept the truth dont run from yourself and reality

unless the 3 unite this pain wont recede - which is the need of the hour

Originally posted by: aahana86

wow quite a discussion going on in here so gals allow me to add my 2 cents 😳😳

as i see actually we all agree on 1 thing that gunjan should stop doing this .. living in denial basically

she is and has always been very stubborn esp when it comes to her loved ones and the most closest to her in her life have been samrat and nupur - she didnt even hesitate fighting with nupur for Samrat - post her roshni se date twice - once in his farmhouse and next day in the library - cause she knew the truth - however here she doesnt even wanna accept it

as malli aka yashi rightly said in the paralytic track she was all smiles in front of the gang she remains the same today in front of mayu... she is trying to be his rock thinking he needs her support which is true but the fact is she is not seeing the damage that her help is equally doing to all 3 actually

rem the chaiwalla scene in the paralytic track she said she doesnt need him yet he found a way to help her by doing the genie act.. it also had a small moment ... the one where as soon as he glasses fogged up she called sam instantly...

that part of her knows... she needs him .. no matter what he can solve all her problems whether or not she asks him ... i also rem Sam having this FB of her last night as he drank - whenever i needed u .. u helped me somehow - in another chaiwalla scene on vday

she knows sam is the only one who can get through to her and so she is running from him trying to forget herself entirely - like Sam she is suffering from the most severe kind of survivor's guilt actually - i think she believes the life she is living was meant to be of her di's

but what makes her case worse is her not acknowledging the truth is not only making things stop in her life but also Samrat and Mayu...

Sam as not only without her is he lonely - but also as he thinks he is guilty - added to which the absence of Gunjan and Mayank in his life - who he considers family makes him wanna punish himself even more as he feels their leaving him didnt even give him a chance to regret and repent

like Sam said to gunji dard baatne se kam hota hai - he feels he shd have been there for them as family but it didnt happen

mayank as - thou he is shown now finally acknowledging his feelings - his affection for Sammy that at moments makes him , his heart melt - thinking of Gunjan he stops in his tracks and doesnt take that much needed step

atm Sammy is in terrible shape agree but the fact is he is actually more controlled and also stronger frankly to me amidst the 3 ... cause he has shown the courage the most early amongst the 3 - that of returning to excel - facing his past - the other 2 need him as well as he needs them to - cause his problem is to get rid of his burden - be guilt-free ; which can happen only when the other 2 forgive him but - they need him to come terms to reality - which he has done - when he said to ash accept the truth dont run from yourself and reality

unless the 3 unite this pain wont recede - which is the need of the hour

woww aahana beautifully said...wud just elaborate on one point as u said...yes gunjan is punishing sam as she cant forgive him for what happened with nupur and mayank...but along with that...she is also running away from him coz more or less she internally has the realization that its sam only who can make her week...she knows she cant help but melt and break if he comes to console her...and thats what she doesnt want...she dont want her firmness to be affected by samrat's love.so she tries not to even think abt him...n thus again her DENIAL comes into play.
if i examplify...whenever someone talks abt death in front of us...whats our reaction..after a minute or two we divert the talk...bcoz thats a truth we are scared 2 accept...its a harsh reality we know...but we hesitate 2 accept. thats same here...she is running away from talking abt him...his memories..his thoughts and doesnt want to even see him...coz just one reason...she is scared to lose her firmness of living in this denial.

Originally posted by: princessyashika

woww aahana beautifully said...wud just elaborate on one point as u said...yes gunjan is punishing sam as she cant forgive him for what happened with nupur and mayank...but along with that...she is also running away from him coz more or less she internally has the realization that its sam only who can make her week...she knows she cant help but melt and break if he comes to console her...and thats what she doesnt want...she dont want her firmness to be affected by samrat's love.so she tries not to even think abt him...n thus again her DENIAL comes into play.
if i examplify...whenever someone talks abt death in front of us...whats our reaction..after a minute or two we divert the talk...bcoz thats a truth we are scared 2 accept...its a harsh reality we know...but we hesitate 2 accept. thats same here...she is running away from talking abt him...his memories..his thoughts and doesnt want to even see him...coz just one reason...she is scared to lose her firmness of living in this denial.

thx mallu and so it just boils down to this the need for Gunjan' breakdown she just needs to cry and accept her grief - to come to terms with her reality - she has to set Nupur free - to break her own self imposed mental psychological and emotional exile - only by which can also Samrat and mayank proceed too