Is Gunjan's behaviour Normal? - Page 3

Originally posted by: utfracks

You know, the CVs don't intend to think so deep, like you all seem to be justifying Gunjan's behavior. CVs don't have an ounce of brains to think this deep. Surely they're reason behind Gunjan's behavior is different compared to what all Sajan fans feel. Many a times, we've tried to justify Nupur's actions, giving it a valid reasoning, when CVs have actually ruined it all and given the lamest reasons EVER. So my advise, keep your hopes the lowest, just so you won't be disappointed.

My take from what I've read through updates.
Gunjan is simply trying to change herself, so she can cope with life. Maybe for her its a way to keep Nupur alive, but seriously, I don't see much similarity in her and Nupur anyway. Sometimes when incidents like these happen, you tend to become a different person altogether. Maybe not always becoming like the person who died, just to keep them alive, but just change yourself completely beyond recognition.
That's what Gunjan is doing. I can understand her concern for Mayank, but she really needs to understand Mayank is really vulnerable at this stage. She trying to be like Nupur might just make things worse for him, maybe the cause for his emotional breakdown.

At this time, he just needs someone to help him in living his life, help him in learning to live without the person who meant the whole world to him.

In all this, I feel the worst for Samrat. The way he's been terribly isolated by the two people he loves so much, he's become a different person altogether. This is another effect of a terrible loss. He lost everything. He wants to change himself beyond recognition, just so that he can try and forget that Samrat ever existed.

So well, I can tell you one thing. Gunjan trying to be like Nupur to keep Nupur alive for herself is justified, but Gunjan trying to be like Nupur for Mayank is NOT justified.

My POV. No offence.

rachna I can understand u saying all this being an MN fan ..

but I believ that everytime v think of something wrt SG, it usually does happen .. mayb not exactly what v hav thought abt .. but either one of the many options tht v hav predicted for them, DO happen on the show .. this again mayb because v think abt the situation from all the possible angles ..

ofcourse our hopes are all time low considering tht the CVs hav a tendency to build up tracks beautifully, but end it equally messily and stupidly .. and I do keep the option open that CVs are jus messing everything up and messing up wit each and every character left on the show .. and well, if that happens, then the show anyways ends for me .. MoNaya or no MoNaya.. because for me, characters hold utmost importance .. but as long as they are in there, why not think abt all the possibilities?

yup..sam's condition is the worst I wud hav said, but IF this is what gunjan is going thru then her condition is no better than sam's ..

@ bold : this is a romantic angle what u are talking abt .. and when v are talking abt gunjan trying to b like nupur for mayank is not abt tht .. rather, its more like a family .. I mean, they are always like siblings - mayank and gunjan..plus they are far too alike human beings to even think abt each other in a romantic sense .. I hav always looked at MaJan beyond romance..and I think their relations is one of the most beautiful relations shown on this show now ..

Originally posted by: utfracks

You know, the CVs don't intend to think so deep, like you all seem to be justifying Gunjan's behavior. CVs don't have an ounce of brains to think this deep. Surely they're reason behind Gunjan's behavior is different compared to what all Sajan fans feel. Many a times, we've tried to justify Nupur's actions, giving it a valid reasoning, when CVs have actually ruined it all and given the lamest reasons EVER. So my advise, keep your hopes the lowest, just so you won't be disappointed.

My take from what I've read through updates.
Gunjan is simply trying to change herself, so she can cope with life. Maybe for her its a way to keep Nupur alive, but seriously, I don't see much similarity in her and Nupur anyway. Sometimes when incidents like these happen, you tend to become a different person altogether. Maybe not always becoming like the person who died, just to keep them alive, but just change yourself completely beyond recognition.
That's what Gunjan is doing. I can understand her concern for Mayank, but she really needs to understand Mayank is really vulnerable at this stage. She trying to be like Nupur might just make things worse for him, maybe the cause for his emotional breakdown.

At this time, he just needs someone to help him in living his life, help him in learning to live without the person who meant the whole world to him.

In all this, I feel the worst for Samrat. The way he's been terribly isolated by the two people he loves so much, he's become a different person altogether. This is another effect of a terrible loss. He lost everything. He wants to change himself beyond recognition, just so that he can try and forget that Samrat ever existed.

So well, I can tell you one thing. Gunjan trying to be like Nupur to keep Nupur alive for herself is justified, but Gunjan trying to be like Nupur for Mayank is NOT justified.

My POV. No offence.

You do understand how vulnerable Mayank is, but try and understand Gunjan too. She's still in denial. For her Nupur is with her. She's trying to hold on to her. Her being so happy on Nupur's birthday itself shows that she hasn't accepted Nupur's death. She's never had anyone to console her, because since Nupur died, she's been trying to portray herself as strong in front of Mayank. But internally, she's breaking down every minute. She needs someone to tell her that Nupur's gone forever, it was what destiny had in store for her. Obviously, she's not in a position to make out what she's doing isn't good for Mayank.

hey zeeru!!!!! u noe it happens....wen u break frm inside and outside u got to support sum1 else...u start pretending to be happy!!!

@Mads- I'm not talking of the romantic angle. I'm talking even in general. If my friend has lost someone he loved so dearly, more than his life, and is trying to cope with the loss, I would definitely not try to remind him of his lost love during that phase. Sometimes you need to leave a person alone for him to recover from the loss. Sometimes even Family cannot help you cope with the loss. It's you who has to deal with it alone. Gunjan maybe trying to help Mayank as family, but by her trying to be like Nupur, Mayank will NEVER be able to move on. He'll still be stuck up where he is. And Gunjan wants him to live life, move on in life. But she isn't helping in anyway by being like Nupur. We see that Mayank only ends up dwelling more into the past, and nothing more. The REAL person who needs help is Samrat. Ofcourse Gunjan has suffered quite a lot, and maybe she blames Samrat for the whole thing, but then why can't she be like Nupur then, and understand what Samrat feels? She should have known that Nupur would have definitely forgiven Samrat, considering it was NOT entirely his fault. So my point here is, if she wants to change herself and become like Nupur, she needs to understand both Mayank AND Samrat like Nupur. And if she can't, she should remain like Gunjan and then try to lead her life, with the help of those memories. That's my point here, mads.

No offence.(it's become very important to state this)
I am NOT bashing Gunjan, so please do not take it in that sense. Cause I know if it was vice versa, you would have gone through similar emotions like most of the mayurians. It's just natural.

Originally posted by: aa123.80

You do understand how vulnerable Mayank is, but try and understand Gunjan too. She's still in denial. For her Nupur is with her. She's trying to hold on to her. Her being so happy on Nupur's birthday itself shows that she hasn't accepted Nupur's death. She's never had anyone to console her, because since Nupur died, she's been trying to portray herself as strong in front of Mayank. But internally, she's breaking down every minute. She needs someone to tell her that Nupur's gone forever, it was what destiny had in store for her. Obviously, she's not in a position to make out what she's doing isn't good for Mayank.

I understand what Gunjan is going through. Well, but same applies to Mayank doesn't it? When he's finally learnt to accept that Nupur is no more, he's again being reminded of Nupur. sometimes, if there are two contradictory things going on, it can affect the mental stability of a person. If Gunjan is in a position to help out Mayank in coping with life, sure she should also be in a position to know what's right and what's wrong.

Great post VampirePrincess. [Sorry, don't know your name]

Gunjan lost Nupur that day who had been more a part of her then anyone else. Her sister who had been her guide, her strength and her hope for her entire life was taken away from her in just one moment. And its just not easy to accept that someone who has been a part of you for your entire life is not there in your life anymore. She's not there to guide her, to tell her she'll be there, to show her the right path, to make her smile on her worst days and to just be Nupur for her.

Gunjan tries to be Nupur, to live Nupur's life, for Mayank, for Ash, for herself… Because she still hasn't accepted that Nupur won't come back, she still hasn't learned to live without Nupur. She still needs Nupur in her life. She wants Nupur in her life… and she tries to be that Nupur to fill the void in her life.

But as Diya said, no idea if the CV's are thinking so much for this track. But Gunjan's behaviour reflects the pain she is going through.

Originally posted by: sonali.19281

@Diya...Smart thinking..wonder where you come up wid all this from 😉

jokes apart...she is definitely in some sort of delusion..where she is recreating some one else vis a vis herself...someone she so hopes was still around...and in the bargain doesnt mind losing herself...or should I say deliberately LOST herself...and is scared..to face her past in the form of excel and Sam that reminds her of the GUNJAN..she locked up..or thinks died in that accident.. hence she is clearly running away from him..not coz she blames him but she blames both..and cant stand the risk of facing either ...THE SAMRAT and THE GUNJAN...that would completely throw her at the edge..

and I see 2 options..of a dramatic breakdown..through meeting samrat..and facing her worst fears..ending her spell of denial..or a slow progressive melt down...through rohan and ash..by re-living the old spirited days of youthfulness..that can bring her out of her self imposed exile from Individuality

@bold - oh, I get by ... with a little help ... from my friends 😆

@red - I think I expect a combination of both ... an initial slow melt down, through Ro Ash ... after the RoAsh Gun scene yesterday, I have some hope suddenly ... because the way Gunji has closed her mind so completely right now, there doesn't seem to be much chance of any emotional breakdown in the immediate future ... and this part I would like to see ...
followed by a grand finale of an emotional drama ... simply because that's the way the CV's always do things ... wrap up tracks unrealistically and with lots of drama ... like the Gunjan paralysis recovery track ... well, it's a show, so guess that's to be expected 😉 and I really want to see an emotional SG reunion at the end of this track ...

@mads - Also, as you said, Samrat atm is lost himself, he's in no condition to be strong for her, and unless he gets that strength, he can't be of any use to her. Which was why that scene of Sam seeing Gunjan last night made sense to me (belatedly 😉) ... he wasn't seeing Gunjan in Ash ... he was just seeing Gunjan ... his Chashmish, and what she would say to him, ... and that stopped him from breaking down ... he was able to get up and leave quietly without any more fuss or tears ... so maybe ... just maybe ... that's a start ...

@me_angel ... agree, it's a form of denial she's living in ...
@aarthi ... exactly, she's trying to be like nupur ... and in front of Mayank, that part comes out most strongly, because for her, Mayank is the strongest reminder of Nupur ... she sees Nupur every time she sees him ... so maybe not so much for Mayank as because of him and the memories of Nups he brings back .. ok, this is getting too complicated ...
but Excel has mixed memories ... Samrat as well as Nupur ... and when she sees Samrat, she remembers the old Gunjan, Chashmish, which she doesnt want to ... so she's avoiding both Excel and Samrat ...

@Ishita ... exactly ... her chirpiness was too forced ... too unnatural ... especially on Nups birthday ... Mayank and Samrat's reactions are normal, they're both in tears, lost in memories, deeply disturbed ... and Gunjan is still trying to be "normal" ... that itself shows how unnatural her behaviour is ...

Originally posted by: utfracks

@Mads- I'm not talking of the romantic angle. I'm talking even in general. If my friend has lost someone he loved so dearly, more than his life, and is trying to cope with the loss, I would definitely not try to remind him of his lost love during that phase. Sometimes you need to leave a person alone for him to recover from the loss. Sometimes even Family cannot help you cope with the loss. It's you who has to deal with it alone. Gunjan maybe trying to help Mayank as family, but by her trying to be like Nupur, Mayank will NEVER be able to move on. He'll still be stuck up where he is. And Gunjan wants him to live life, move on in life. But she isn't helping in anyway by being like Nupur. We see that Mayank only ends up dwelling more into the past, and nothing more. The REAL person who needs help is Samrat. Ofcourse Gunjan has suffered quite a lot, and maybe she blames Samrat for the whole thing, but then why can't she be like Nupur then, and understand what Samrat feels? She should have known that Nupur would have definitely forgiven Samrat, considering it was NOT entirely his fault. So my point here is, if she wants to change herself and become like Nupur, she needs to understand both Mayank AND Samrat like Nupur. And if she can't, she should remain like Gunjan and then try to lead her life, with the help of those memories. That's my point here, mads.

No offence.(it's become very important to state this)
I am NOT bashing Gunjan, so please do not take it in that sense. Cause I know if it was vice versa, you would have gone through similar emotions like most of the mayurians. It's just natural.

rachna I dont think u are understanding gunjan here..or the topic too .. gunjan is not in a position to kno whats right and wrong .. she is trying to herself cope up wit the deal that her di is no longer a part of her life .. she has NOT gotten over it herself.. only when she gets over it, will she think abt whats right and wrong for mayank .. and she has been trying to console him in her own way..being ther for him..making him happy ..

what u are saying is right .. if she has to make him cum out of it..he needs to cum out of those memories because thats not taking him anywhere..but I wud say, those memories are what keeps him sane and coherent..because those memories are his strength via which he wud kno what path to follow in his life..via nups' memories and her love, he understands what path he needs to follow, like she is his guiding light thru all of this ..

and u dont prob understand gunjan enuf to kno that she is ultra stubborn..yes, she is not understanding sam;s pain right now..because she refuses to open up tht mind of hers wher she can understand sam..because for her, that sam and that gunjan has died..and for her to feel sam again, she needs to feel his chashmish again .. or vice versa..and that can only happen when she finally makes herself believ that nupur is no more and that no matter how much ever she tries, she cant keep her alive ..

@ bold : ofcourse thats the end of it all..but what v are saying is a stage before this .. because u believ gunjan is doing all this on purpose..v believ she isnt .. and tht she herself is in need of help..and ofcourse if she herself is in need of help, then how is she counselling ppl? isnt that double standards..yes, they are .. its wrong, but thats what is happening here and v cannot reallly understand her completely, unless v see death that closely as she has..losing her sister, who has been like a mom to her .. and living each day widout that part of her .. is ofcourse not easy .. but she is trying ..

in case u feel v are justifying gunjan and saying she is right..no, v arent doing that..she is wrong .. but v are justifying where she is coming from .. what is wrong is wrong .. but v are talking abt how she reached ther..or why she is wher she is..and how she can cum out of it .. if at all the CVs are planning anything like this..if they arent, well .. then its absolutely lame to say the very least!

@ blue : rachna, I beg of u..please dont remind me of this..because most of the things that hav been going on on this forum hav been ignored by me by imagining jus that ..

@Mads- I do understand Gunjan, cause I'm more or less like her. But what I don't understand is, if she's in a position to understand what Ash goes through and has helped her come out of it, (She obviously didn't try to be like Ash's parents to help her get out of it, right?) she can ofcourse understand Mayank's pain. Ofcourse her pain isn't any less, but Mads, really, CVs haven't thought so deep. Maybe yes, Gunjan hasn't gotten over the loss, but neither is she unaware of what's going on around her. I'm not saying she's doing it purposely, but then again, I'm also not saying that she's not aware of what she's doing. She is ofcourse aware of what she's doing. And the biggest example for that is Ash. She knows what Ash has gone through, and helped her through it. Maybe she could do the same thing for Mayank. Talk to him, help him through it. I feel, more than the need to keep Nupur alive, she needs to keep Gunjan alive, cause she should understand that Nupur would NEVER want her to kill that Gunjan, for whom she's been for every single time. And if she feels Nupur is still alive, ofcourse she would know that Nupur would NEVER want her to kill the Gunjan inside her. I think if she keeps Gunjan alive, only then will she feel Nupur is still alive and is still with her. Maybe I don't understand Gunjan as well as you all do, but then again, this is what everyone would do.

Originally posted by: utfracks

I understand what Gunjan is going through. Well, but same applies to Mayank doesn't it? When he's finally learnt to accept that Nupur is no more, he's again being reminded of Nupur. sometimes, if there are two contradictory things going on, it can affect the mental stability of a person. If Gunjan is in a position to help out Mayank in coping with life, sure she should also be in a position to know what's right and what's wrong.

@ utfracks - I agree with your first post ... she's doing it for herself, not really for Mayank ... and that's why as Ishita said @red - she is NOT really helping out Mayank ... so @ blue - I disagree with what you say here - she's NOT in a position to know what's right and what's wrong ... vis a vis her reaction to Nupur's death, and subsequent reactions to Mayank and Samrat in her life ...

Mayank is trying to cope ... but Gunjan is unwittingly becoming a painful reminder of what he has lost ...

Gunjan's breakdown is becoming more and more imperative for all three of them to come to terms ...