OS - I NEED YOU FOR MYSELF!!! part 3 pg 22 Sept 03

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libran13

@libran13

Explorer

Posted: 9 years ago

#111

Beautifully written. If the Cv's incorporate this story line into the show, it would be so apt to the story leading to the redemption and patch up.

Your style of writing is very gripping and engaging. I could actually visualize each and every scene you have written.

I am eagerly waiting for the next part and i have no doubt that it is going to be as engaging as this.

Please do update soon.

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taara113

@taara113

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#112

That was an absolutely amazing piece of writing...what do i even say about dev and what has become of him...the most selfless relationship became the most selfish for his guy...i truly believe there is no one in this world who can love you as selflessly as your parents...they are the only people who love you even when you don't give it back to them, every other relationship is a give and take but this one...as children we only end up reciprocating their love by maybe passing on the same love to our kids someday ...and this belief that they love u so much despite whatever you do; while gives wings to some children to fly high (even when that means sometimes leaving your parents far behind) but there others who live lives burdened by what they think is a favor done to them...they live under that pressure of how their parents sacrificed their lives for them and now they are obliged for life...in case of dev this obligation was so overbearing that nothing else remained...you see it as your way of loving your parents back...but love can never bind you its sets you free...atleast as far as the love of a parent goes...but when it comes to ishwari as the writers of tthe show said usme khudgarzi ki milawat hai...dev is like that prize she won in a competition which she can show to everyone, even lend it to others sometimes to show her benevolence but she can never give it away even to any other kid of hers...

and then there are other extreme times when i feel its like she has put him in the place of her husband unconsciously, dev has become that emotional anchor that on looks in a partner and that is something she cannot share...

and i have now completely lost track of what i was thinking and trying to write...ufff...

coming back to your brilliant writing...it breaks my heart so much to see dev like this...and the way you explain it...i can totally visualize it

and that curled baby on the bed with no one on whose lap he could keep his head and peacefully sleep...its just sooo sad...he has wronged sonakshi in so many ways but i still just cant stop feeling bad for him...what a man did ishwari make out of that small 8 year old boy...coming to neha i have always felt she can have a more stronger presence in the show also...more than mamaji, i would want her to come and and talk to dev...

and wel yesss ms.bose came...yaaayyy...thats the devakshi fana in me going all cheery...ab heroine aa gae hai to pls kuch happy happy kardo...

i know i know angst and depression and tears are every writers favorite and love-stories with that sad longing ending leave that forever impact...but for watever its worth, id request you to end this story (wenever) you do on a happy note...our constant interaction with these characters make them so real and close that i can really not see them having a sad ending; even if that is wat wld happen...im sure there are high possibilities of a man in such a state to actually never come out of it...its not easy for the girl too just runaway frm an arranged marriage...its also not easy for a woman like ishwari to change herself forever...but id still wish that he is okay, she is der with him...and ishwari is just more saner...

waiting for the next part very very eagerly...

PS. i ended up writing up one of my longest posts on this forum; i dont even know why...just happens at times...it is also the most disjointed confused post ever...but anyways now that i have typed so much id anyways post it...

Edited by taara113 - 9 years ago

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Ferdous_69

@Ferdous_69

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#113

Amazing update dear... U made me cry 😭 😭
Trust me I was continuously crying 😭 ... Ohhh it was so emotional yet so beautiful
Awsome write-up dear...
Egerly waiting for next part... Plz update soon

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lourel24

@lourel24

Voyager

Posted: 9 years ago

#114

Such a fabulous update. Would be waiting for next update eagerly. So so beautifully written.

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gmgi

@gmgi

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#115

Brilliant!!! Can't help but feel for Dev. It had to come to this for Ishwari to open her eyes. Loved it. Waiting for the next part.

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Aazeen02

@Aazeen02

Sparkler

+ 5

Posted: 9 years ago

#116

Originally posted by: fanktlk

Dekha Aazeen. She wrote this for you. Mein toh mana Kar rahi thi. Last part bhi aayega jaldi.

If I am the reason behind this, I am very happy about it... Getting spoiled, is good sometimes, you know...🤪😃

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rasika_DS

@rasika_DS

Dazzler

Posted: 9 years ago

#117

This needs to be sent straight away to the writers. What a masterpiece👏👏 ⭐️

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fanktlk

@fanktlk

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#118

Yes, I know I said that this was to be a single part OS. Par kya kare!! I couldn't NOT type the part two after last night's episode and what's more.. there is a part 3 too, which I plan to post some time tomorrow.

Happy reading!!

Cheater... You say you wont write .. then hound me and I have to write reviews... But i thought the first part was not complete. In that sense a second and third part is called for..

Neha stepped into the room and went to sit beside her bhai, gently wiping away the tears that were making tracking on the side of his face, disappearing into his hair. She wiped them, only to realize there was again a fresh track. The tears weren't stopping. And they were silent. So silent. No hiccupping. No hitch in the breath. Just silent pain flowing out from the broken mind.

I know we discussed this.. but to read it was something else. I could visualize Dev quietly crying and Neha just wiping away his tears... This was such a touching scene.

And beside the bed was Ishwari, trying to reach Dev. Take him in her lap and console him. "Ishwari!" Mamaji pulled her away and out of the room, away from Dev, urging Neha to call the doctor. "I told you to stay away from Dev, didn't I?"

This seemed a little harsh.. Maybe the traces of Mamji from the serial is still in my head. So I am unable to visualize him being stern at Ishwari... But this was needed I guess a wake up call. But for Ishwari to realize that she is causing pain to Dev by even coming close to him.. is a little too much... Compensating for the serial are we?

Her son was strong, she'd boasted. Like iron. But today that iron was melting. Because he had thrown himself into the fire for her.

Broken Dev was needed But reading this caused me more pain than It did Ishwari... I am sure...

There was only one thing that stood between Dev and insanity and that was Dr Sonakshi Bose.

Loved this line... Just loved it.

Edited by fanktlk - 9 years ago