You Are My Destiny PH FF (Chapter 14 on Page 36)(1.10.18) - Page 6

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Posted: 7 years ago
#51

Originally posted by: Fatima_Q

Read chapter 2:

Aww...Prem and Preet were so sweet to get Balwant bailed from jail.

And they fought off goons too 👏

So I have do have a bit of constructive criticism...I like the concept of the story...older wife...younger husband...how will they handle their marriage as well as people's reaction...but in reading over your character sketch again, I realized you've made Heer only 2 years older than Prem. I wouldn't really characterize that as an "older woman". Five, seven or even 10 years...that would have made a greater impact...but that's just my point of view 😳

Are you also going to show some childhood connection or understanding between Heer and Prem? Or will you establish this connection now? I mean, there has to be a reason for him to step in and marry her when the situation warrants it. Or will he just be the noble son to do as his parents wish?

I'm very much interested to see how the story proceeds from this point...so do update soon. I'm not really a Premeer fan...so...good job of getting me involved in the story. 👍🏼

I understand that, your point of view that, if Heer is 5 years older than Prem then, it would have been interesting.
However, that could be only possible in love marriage however, in this story Prem Heer will be married but it willl be some kinds of arranged marriage.
Believe me in indian society outside of elite clas, if your wife is same aged as you then you will face backlash from some of your kins and friends.
And they will go nuts and make colorful comments about you if you younger than your wife even it is only b y six months.
Therefore, I can't make Heer more than two years older than Prem.
By the way
I write the prologue for same aged couple completely from my personal experiences and experiencees of my friends.
I heard the comment for myself from my relatives as my wife is only a month younger than me.
I think they would have gone nuts if she was older than me by a year or two.

I am feeling happy that this story get your attention.
You will also see other couples. Feel free to express your opinion, I always welcome constructive criticism.


Posted: 7 years ago
#52
@Fatima Prem is not the son of Lalit and Gayetri.
He is their nephew in this ff.
He loves his family and feel indebt to Lalit and Gayetri. He also very close to his Balraj mamu.
Posted: 7 years ago
#53
Update alert
new chapter will be posted within few minutes .
PM will be sent in the morning.
Posted: 7 years ago
#54

You are my destiny, Prem Heer FF

Chapter 3:

Prem, Heer, Preet, Nihal, and Balwant returned to Maan house. However, rest of the house members of Maan house were shocked to see dust, blood, scratch in the body of the Prem, Preet, Nihal, and Heer. They were shocked after seeing the bandage in Prem's hand.

"Ye sab kya hain beta? A shocked Balraj asked Nihal.

"Bauji jab humne chachaji ko chorane gaye tab ... Nihal told Balraj how many charges were filed against Balwant. How inspector insulted the Maan family and Junejas because of Balwant's behavior. How Prem and Preet helped them in giving rest of the money for the bond.

Then he told him about how gangs of 15 goons came to attack Balwant and how they misbehave with Heer and then how the fight started between gangs of goons and Maan Juneja cousins. At the end, Nihal told them how a goon was planning to attack Heer from the behind and how Prem saved her from that goon.

Balraj and rest of the family were shocked after learning the whole situation. He could not believe that, Balwant would put his family and even his extended family in so much trouble and insult.

"Dekhliya Daljeete teri pati ki wajashe hume kitna jillat uthani pad rahi, uske liye goons se mar pit karna pa r raha he humarhe pariwar ko.

Main hamesha kaha Balwant khud ko boori sangat se door rakh. Lekin wo meri baat suntan hi nahi, dekh kis tara sharab khake behoos pada hain, lain ja isse bedroom main isko saat to main subhahi baat kar paonga. Balraj told his sister in law in disgusting voice.

"Prem beta main tumhara aur Preet ka shukar gujar hu. Tumne na sirf Balwant ko jail se chodane main hamari madat ki balki tum to Heer ki jaan bachya. Balraj told Prem.

"Mama aapke ye baat sunke mujhe nirasha ho rahi hain. Kya hum logo ka apne nahi hain kya Balwant mama hamara kutch nahi lagta. Aur rahgi baat Heer ji ko bachane ki to ye to mera faraz tha wo mera second cousin hain aur bahud jald Harman bhai ka patni honge.

Mamaji mere aapse gujarish hain aise thank you , shukar gujar words ka istemal maat kije aur hume aur Preet ko paraiya na samjhe. Prem requsted Balraj.

"Dekho tum to bura maan gaye, mera bolne ka wo matlab nahi tha. Main to hamesha tumhe aur Preet ko apana hi samjha. Dekho raat bahut hogya tum dono ko bhukh jaroo laga hoga, Teji dinner table main khana padoso. After lovingly hugging Prem and Preet , Balraj told Teji to serve the dinner.

Prem and Preet were greeted with variety of dishes in the dining table.

"Bass mami aur nahi hum pahele sei to kha aye the dhaba se, aap Ashlesha ji ko deje, onhono to aapni plate main kutch bhi nahi liya. Preet protested after seeing so many foods in his plate. He tried to deflect the attention towards Ash who had hardly any food in her plate.

"Wo meri dieting chal raha hain. Ash replied in a shy voice.

Preet found her behavior weird and told slowly Meher who was sitting beside him.

"Meher ji agar Ash ji bhookha reheni ko dieting ka naam diya to kutchi din main matches ki khati ka tara hojayigi. He told slowly in the ear of Meher.

"Aap ki baat to sahi hain lekin please ye baat wonke mat kije, wo roh degi. Meher warned Preet.

"Meher di tum dono kya baat kar rahi ho? A curious Ash asked Meher. She did not like the closeness between Preet and Meher.

"Aarhe kutch nahi main to bass Meher ji ko ye bata raha tha ki aap kitni health conscious hain aur kitna fit hain bilkul model ki tarah. Preet told Ash.

"Aap bhi na Preet ji . Ash shyly smiled.

On the other corner of the table, Heer was observing Prem. She still had some good childhood memory with Prem. She liked the fact that, the helping nature of Prem did not change at all from his childhood to now. She was impressed that, how Prem considered her family as his kin. She was obviously grateful to Prem for saving her life. She promised to herself to remember her life was saved by Prem and she would help him in future whenever he needed it from her.

Prem felt Heer was observing him. He slowly smiled at Heer after realizing that. Prem liked Heer as a person. Prem could still remember her from his childhood memories, as he shared a good rapport with her in their childhood. Her independent nature, her love for her family impressed Prem greatly. He had no doubt that Heer was an excellent choice for the eldest daughter in law of Juneja house.

Prem knew his Harman bhai sometimes looked like a self-centered person but Prem knew that, his Harman bhai loved his family in his own way. Now he was hoping that his Harman bhai would have a good married life with Heer.

In next morning:

Prem was sitting on the bed after he freshened up in the washroom. He looked at the cut, it was still giving pain to him, but he was also feeling that his cut was slowly healing.

Prem decided that, it was his exercise time. He started his physical exercise. He was so engaged in his physical exercise that he did not notice that, someone was knocking on his door.

Prem opened the door and he saw Ash was waiting for him outside of the door.

"Ji boliye? Prem asked Ash.

But Ash was not in the state of saying something. Her eyes were moving from Prem's face to his abs and muscle. Her check was reddening. Prem was still waiting for a reply from Ash.

Prem finally realized that, Ash was checking him out top to bottom and she was not taking her eyes away from his body. Even though Prem was raised in abroad, he was not enjoying that. He was feeling awkard.

"Ashlesha ji hello aap ko kutch bol na hain kya. Prem again asked Ash politely.

Heer was coming to Prem's room as Ash did not return after being sent to call Prem into dining room for breakfast. She observed that, Prem was continuously asking Ash politely and Ash was not replying those questions rather than Ash was checking him out. Heer realized that, Prem was feeling super awkward in the whole situation.

"Ash tu jaldi ja chachi tujhe bula raha he. Heer touched Ash and brought her into the reality.

Ash quickly left the spot after hearing that.

"Prem ji aap dining room ayiye sab aab ka intejar kar raha hain. Heer informed Prem.

Prem felt very much thankful to Heer for saving him from the awkwardness.

"Ji main do minute main aaraha ho. Prem replied to Heer.

After taking leave from Prem . Heer decided to have a conversation with her cousin Ash as she felt her first cousin did not behave properly with her second cousin.

It was Sunday and after taking breakfast, Geet decided there should be a hangout with all the cousins. All of them agreed even though Nihal was reluctant at first with that proposal. However he was convinced by Prem.

All of them went to car and soon reached to a smaller but loving house.

"Aap ko yaad hain Prem ji aap jab chote the tab hum yaha aye the iss summer house pe picnic karne ke liye. Geet told Prem.

"Yaad kyuin nahi hoga jaroor yaad hain, shahar se door nature ke pass iss jayge peek alak sa sakun hain. Prem told Geet.

"Hume to kutch karna chaiye. Preet declared.

"I second the motion. Meher supported the idea.

" Kyuin na hum ek singing competition ka intejam kare. Geet proposed.

"Lekin judge kaun hoga? Preet asked.

"Hamhare Nihal bhai honge judge kyuin ki onhe gaan gaana bilkul nahi ata. Meher declared.

"Thick hain humhe manjoor hain dekh te kis me kina hai dum. Preet enthusiastically supported the idea.

"Aab Kyuin ki Heer didi hum sabse bade hain kyuin iss program ki sharuat unke gano se ho. Geet proposed and her proposal swiftly agreed.

"Didi aap uss gaan se sharu kije jisko aap gungun kar thi hain. Meher suggested.

"Mere khawabon mein jo Aaye

Aake Mujhe Chhed jaye

Usse kahoon kabhi samne to aaye

Kaisa hai kaun hai vo jaane kahin hain

Jiske liye mere honthon pe haan hain Heer started the singing.

Prem was stunned to hear the good singing voice of Heer. For Prem it seemed like Heer meant every words of that song, as if she was singing from her heart. He could feel the emotion in her voice. He could even detect that, she was feeling anxious about her wedding with Harman. She did not know about his Harman bhai's personality and it was making her feeling uncertain, but at the same time she was hoping that, she would get along with Harman.

"Wah wah Heer ji kya gaya apne aur fikat maat kije Harman bhai aaj hi aarha hain poori family ke saat. Preet announced.

"Ha Heer ji aap bahut aache gaye. Prem also praised the singing of Heer.

Meher and Geet also praised Heer voice.

"Aab Prem bhaiya gayenge Preet declared.

"Har ghadi badal rahi hai roop zindagi

Chaanv hai kabhi , kabhi hai dhoop zindagi

Har pal yahan

Jee bhar jiyo jo hai samaa

Kal ho naa ho

Chaahe jo tumhe poore dil se

Milta hai woh mushkil se

Aisa jo koi kahin hai

Uss haath ko tum thaam lo

Who meherbaan kal ho naa ho

Har pal yahaan

Jee bhar jiyo jo hai samma

Kal ho naa ho. Prem started to sing from his soul. His whole life was built up on that philosophy. Prem thought about his life in deeper level, he thought about the purpose of his life but he never forgot to appreciate and love who was closer to him. He wanted to enjoy his life around his friends and his relatives as he learned that life could be short sometimes from the premature death of his parents. He felt deeply in debt to his badi maa and papa for giving their helpful hands when he became an orphan.

Heer was shocked to hear such good singing voice of Prem. She never thought that, Prem could have such good singing voice. According to Heer it seemed like Prem was singing from the experiences of his life, his voice told her that, there were few bad experiences in his life but it still did not prevent him to appreciate the life. Heer's respect for Prem increased as she appreciates his positive outlook to life.

"Bhaiya gaana to aap bahut acche gaye, lekin iss serious gaana aap kyuin gaye ? Preet asked Prem.

"Preet zindegi hassin hain is liye hume usse enjoy karna chahiye aapne pariwar aur dosto ka saat jabtak zindegi hamari saat hain. Kyun ki zindegi kabhi bhi badal sakte hain tumhare khilaf. Zindegi tumhe kabhi bhi aisi halat me dhal sakte hain jaha tumhe kutch samaj nahi ararah hain, tab agar koi tumhara dost tumhare saat dene ke liye haat badata hain tab tumhe uss haat ko tham lena chahiye. Kyunki kya pata woh tumhe tumhari asli manjil tak le jaay. Prem replied to Preet in a serious tone, however his eye met with Heer at the end of the statement.

Both of them did not life will test them very soon.

End of Chapter3

I like to say I am very happy for the responses I got for this ff.

Your every review inspires me to write more, therefore please give your reviews to this chapter.

sadiaharshiti thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
#55
It's always nice to read ur stories 😊
Yeahh zindgi haseen hai aur hme ise enjoy krna chahye ...

Superb dialogues from preet

Good work 👍🏼






Posted: 7 years ago
#56

Originally posted by: sadiaharshiti

It's always nice to read ur stories 😊

Yeahh zindgi haseen hai aur hme ise enjoy krna chahye ...

Superb dialogues from preet

Good work 👍🏼






Thanks for the review.
The dialogue was actually told by Prem to Preet,
but I am very glad that, you like the dialogue.
You are also first reviewer of this chapter, so thanks again for that.
byeleftgone thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
#57
Lovely update i love it. Love all the scene
I enjoyed reading it.
Love the respect prem&heer have toward each other.
Premeer singing scene is very beautifully written. Love prem's dailouge .
Waiting for more.

Thanks for the update liinks.
Edited by preciousrose26 - 7 years ago
Posted: 7 years ago
#58

Originally posted by: preciousrose26

Lovely update i love it. Love all the scene
I enjoyed reading it.
Love the respect prem&heer have toward each other.
Premeer singing scene is very beautifully written. Love prem's dailouge .
Waiting for more.

Thanks for the update liinks.

Thanks for liking this update.
In next chapter we will see entry of rest of junejas.
I also written chapter 2 of Life is still beautiful with you. Please comment on that story also.
sadiaharshiti thumbnail
9th Anniversary Thumbnail Explorer Thumbnail
Posted: 7 years ago
#59

Originally posted by: mijanur

Thanks for the review.
The dialogue was actually told by Prem to Preet,
but I am very glad that, you like the dialogue.
You are also first reviewer of this chapter, so thanks again for that.

Edited by sadiaharshiti - 7 years ago
sana.harshiti thumbnail
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Posted: 7 years ago
#60
Lovely update i love it
I enjoyed every scenes
Premeer singing scene is
waiting for next update

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