The Foreign Self: Part XIV to XVI-B - Page 4

Hi Armana

everytime I read your update,I fall short of words.I feel there are no words to describe your talent.I mean this from the bottom of my heart,that was truly fabalous.just beautifully written.loved how jai reassures bani abt staying in one room,to ranveer and nachiket's eagerness to know more abt there guest to pia and puskhar curiosty abt bani,just wonderful.the way you describe the history behind the name Jannat,simply superb.I am so eager to read the next part. 😊

preet 😛

Hi guys,
I just got a pm, which i feel very compelled to share with you all. I am going to keep the sender's identity anonymous, since i haven't asked her if i can post it.


Sent by : .......
Sent : 25 March 2007 at 1:38pm

i am sorry, so i thought to write to u in a pm... when we have periods we are not supposed to enter the pooja room or temples right? hope didn't cross u... but if u r not new to this religious side, we don't do any pooja or go near the pooja room if we are having periods for minimum 7 days or still it stopped...

wonderful as always... and as all other writings of yours ..

xyz.

My Reply:

"dear xyz,
I am a very orthodox, practising Hindu.

But here is the thing: God made me a woman. He gave me a uterus. And for him to turn around and tell me that i am 'impure' when my uterus performs it's assigned function, reeks of hypocrisy.
And for the record, this is what my family guru had to say when i asked him about this: For god your sex does not matter, the soul does, and that is sexless. This cordoning off of women during periods is a social custom, designed primarily to give women a much needed physical break when their bodies need it. There is no religious ruling on it, simply an out. If during those days you are feeling unwell you can happily skip observing religious rituals. It is upto you to what degree you wish to impose it upon yourself.
dear xyz, perhaps it's time you realised that a lot of what passes for hinduism are merely social customs, which have been very effectively manipulated by patriarchy over the centuries to control and subjugate women.
So, I and my Bani will continue going to the temple, doing puja, even keep navratri fasts when we have our periods.
Take care
Armana"

So, what do you people think about this?
Do please, take the time to reply.
Armana

Grew up in typical middle-class Hindu family where u don't question your parents and elders...now it is interesting actually thinking about these...remember many of us teenagers being embarassed to death when we were not allowed near the idol at home and thinking "now everyone knows about something so personal"

This is going to be an interesting discussion..
bt

regarding Periods I completely agree with you.
Navaratri is festival of Mata (women). If we have periods and can't worship them. I don't belive that.
I am Hindu. i myself worship.

the old time their was no medicine and in periods their was no such thing as senatory pads and stuff like that.
so it was wise to relax and keep minimum activity and rest.

pooja

Hi Armana,
I have been a silent reader of pretty much all yours( and a lot of other people's fanfics!) for the past year or so now...but just for this post you're my hero(ine) in the forum...
BRAVO!!!
I am also a practising hindu and have a lot of faith in my god...and I believe he doesn't reject me just because my body is going through a routine function. It s a special function because he made me special enough to bear more like me. He doesn't believe I'm unlucky because I was born at a certain time either ---cause you know what..he ascertained when I should come into this world! I should not have to be away from him when I have period just like I shouldn't have to marry a tree because someone thinks I'll be unlucky otherwise.
We need many more like your gururji who are able to look past the old, patriarchal,practices and can just help us be clser to god!
Thank you for your post!!!
👏
as for xyz...I just want to say that its a shame that you feel the need to be ashamed of what is one of the most unique and beautiful aspects of being a woman

Originally posted by: armana

Hi guys,
I just got a pm, which i feel very compelled to share with you all. I am going to keep the sender's identity anonymous, since i haven't asked her if i can post it.


Sent by : .......
Sent : 25 March 2007 at 1:38pm

i am sorry, so i thought to write to u in a pm... when we have periods we are not supposed to enter the pooja room or temples right? hope didn't cross u... but if u r not new to this religious side, we don't do any pooja or go near the pooja room if we are having periods for minimum 7 days or still it stopped...

wonderful as always... and as all other writings of yours ..

xyz.

My Reply:

"dear xyz,
I am a very orthodox, practising Hindu.

But here is the thing: God made me a woman. He gave me a uterus. And for him to turn around and tell me that i am 'impure' when my uterus performs it's assigned function, reeks of hypocrisy.
And for the record, this is what my family guru had to say when i asked him about this: For god your sex does not matter, the soul does, and that is sexless. This cordoning off of women during periods is a social custom, designed primarily to give women a much needed physical break when their bodies need it. There is no religious ruling on it, simply an out. If during those days you are feeling unwell you can happily skip observing religious rituals. It is upto you to what degree you wish to impose it upon yourself.
dear xyz, perhaps it's time you realised that a lot of what passes for hinduism are merely social customs, which have been very effectively manipulated by patriarchy over the centuries to control and subjugate women.
So, I and my Bani will continue going to the temple, doing puja, even keep navratri fasts when we have our periods.
Take care
Armana"

So, what do you people think about this?
Do please, take the time to reply.
Armana

I completely agree with you Armana........go ahead with this POV

Khushboo

OMG...Armana...this is one of my favorite debate topics....

About me - I am spiritual not religious...so I am sorry if my discussion hurts someone's feelings. By spiritual, I mean I believe in God, I worship God, but I do not accept religion as told to me. I have a tendency to question things and when I dont receive an answer to a questiont that satisfies me, I tend to not follow that practice.

So the whole issue about "periods"...

This is my take on it...God made man...He got tired and had a lot of stuff to take care of, so He gave the woman to power to procreate...basically continue His line of work. Now in order to do this He gave me a uterus which needs a break once in a while. Hence the whole period. So if the period is a side effect of a big blessing that God gave me, why would He be offended if I utter His name, pray to Him or do anything during "those" days...

But having said this, I try to follow some of the norms, one of which is entering the pooja room or doing pooja of a murti...in my mind I pray as and when I want. The only reason I avoid entry into the puja room, is to respect the sentiments of the others around me who do not agree with my beliefs.

I cook, I do everything I normally do just like my mom used to. As for what I will teach my children..I am Hindu married to a Jain...so I dont know...I would like to teach them to choose their own beliefs...but then I dont know what the circumstance would be...

anyways...just my thoughts...Rivs

Originally posted by: armana

Hi guys,
I just got a pm, which i feel very compelled to share with you all. I am going to keep the sender's identity anonymous, since i haven't asked her if i can post it.


Sent by : .......
Sent : 25 March 2007 at 1:38pm

i am sorry, so i thought to write to u in a pm... when we have periods we are not supposed to enter the pooja room or temples right? hope didn't cross u... but if u r not new to this religious side, we don't do any pooja or go near the pooja room if we are having periods for minimum 7 days or still it stopped...

wonderful as always... and as all other writings of yours ..

xyz.

My Reply:

"dear xyz,
I am a very orthodox, practising Hindu.

But here is the thing: God made me a woman. He gave me a uterus. And for him to turn around and tell me that i am 'impure' when my uterus performs it's assigned function, reeks of hypocrisy.
And for the record, this is what my family guru had to say when i asked him about this: For god your sex does not matter, the soul does, and that is sexless. This cordoning off of women during periods is a social custom, designed primarily to give women a much needed physical break when their bodies need it. There is no religious ruling on it, simply an out. If during those days you are feeling unwell you can happily skip observing religious rituals. It is upto you to what degree you wish to impose it upon yourself.
dear xyz, perhaps it's time you realised that a lot of what passes for hinduism are merely social customs, which have been very effectively manipulated by patriarchy over the centuries to control and subjugate women.
So, I and my Bani will continue going to the temple, doing puja, even keep navratri fasts when we have our periods.
Take care
Armana"

So, what do you people think about this?
Do please, take the time to reply.
Armana

Armana,

I concur with you absolutely, I was told that this was a custom simply made to give a woman break from the day to day chores, because everything was physical in the old days...The other scientific reason (my conjecture) may be that women get a little emotional during this five days, and hence the temples and religious places didn't want anything but tranquility in their premises...may or may not apply to all women and may be this is a stupid theory....For me, it's more the reason for wanting to be in a serene and tranquil place.

God doesn't want any woman to abstain from praying simply because he/she gave us a mechanism to menstruate...

Sorry if my sentiments offend anyone also....I am going to quote a favorite saying of mine by Eric Hoffer - it's about change....

in a time of drastic change it is the learners who inherit the future. The learned usually find themselves equipped to live in a world that no longer exists.

..The world has changed or changing somewhat, one aspect of religion is praying god, the other aspect is the 'How to pray God' - this is where a lot of questions come up (For me) - for Moksha, there are many ways to reach god, many paths to salvation and for me, you need the purity of mind and purity of soul, (not the purity in the physical sense, lot of people consider, that the menstruation period to be impure.

Sorry, again this is just my POV - no disrespect for any one with different views...

Hi Armana,

I was given the same reason as the one given by your family Guru..that it was one way the elders managed to give some hard earned rest to the normaly hard working woman of the times and over time it became a social taboo.I totally hold with this outlook but if I go to a person's house who doesnt hold with my outlook then I try to do what they follow in their house .

cheers

mandu

Originally posted by: armana

Hi guys,
I just got a pm, which i feel very compelled to share with you all. I am going to keep the sender's identity anonymous, since i haven't asked her if i can post it.


Sent by : .......
Sent : 25 March 2007 at 1:38pm

i am sorry, so i thought to write to u in a pm... when we have periods we are not supposed to enter the pooja room or temples right? hope didn't cross u... but if u r not new to this religious side, we don't do any pooja or go near the pooja room if we are having periods for minimum 7 days or still it stopped...

wonderful as always... and as all other writings of yours ..

xyz.

My Reply:

"dear xyz,
I am a very orthodox, practising Hindu.

But here is the thing: God made me a woman. He gave me a uterus. And for him to turn around and tell me that i am 'impure' when my uterus performs it's assigned function, reeks of hypocrisy.
And for the record, this is what my family guru had to say when i asked him about this: For god your sex does not matter, the soul does, and that is sexless. This cordoning off of women during periods is a social custom, designed primarily to give women a much needed physical break when their bodies need it. There is no religious ruling on it, simply an out. If during those days you are feeling unwell you can happily skip observing religious rituals. It is upto you to what degree you wish to impose it upon yourself.
dear xyz, perhaps it's time you realised that a lot of what passes for hinduism are merely social customs, which have been very effectively manipulated by patriarchy over the centuries to control and subjugate women.
So, I and my Bani will continue going to the temple, doing puja, even keep navratri fasts when we have our periods.
Take care
Armana"

So, what do you people think about this?
Do please, take the time to reply.
Armana

Originally posted by: voxy

Hi Armana,
I have been a silent reader of pretty much all yours( and a lot of other people's fanfics!) for the past year or so now...but just for this post you're my hero(ine) in the forum...

Chaliye, something made you break your vow of silence!
BRAVO!!!
I am also a practising hindu and have a lot of faith in my god...and I believe he doesn't reject me just because my body is going through a routine function. It s a special function because he made me special enough to bear more like me. He doesn't believe I'm unlucky because I was born at a certain time either ---cause you know what..he ascertained when I should come into this world! I should not have to be away from him when I have period just like I shouldn't have to marry a tree because someone thinks I'll be unlucky otherwise.
Don't get angry with me for pointing it out, but here you are referring to Astrology. And in astrology the "marriage to a tree (for a woman)" is not actually sexist.
Since in astrology, ofetn men are also required to first marry a Tulsi tree.
And this is done not because the said man or woman is unlucky but because one of their planets is in a house which endangers the life of their future spouse. So, a woman marries a tree, and a man marries a tulsi plant to protect their spouse to be. This again is a case of the truth getting twisted!

We need many more like your gururji who are able to look past the old, patriarchal,practices and can just help us be clser to god!
Thank you for your post!!!
👏
as for xyz...I just want to say that its a shame that you feel the need to be ashamed of what is one of the most unique and beautiful aspects of being a woman

Perhaps you are being harsh on xyz. She is only telling us what she has been taught. The blame lies on those who taught her this without also teaching her to think for herself even when it came to religion. Not her.
Just my pov. no offence intended!
thank you for writing in and sharing your opinion.
Armana