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Episode 47
How Can I Feel This Way?
The demon is watering his plants. How can that be? Someone who takes great care to nurture plants can't be a demon. Can he? As he is watering his precious babies he has images of Kushi playing in his head. He sees Kushi standing there without her dupatta, he gently hands it to her averting his eyes, conscious of how uncomfortable she is feeling being so exposed to him. Images continue to frolic in his head he sees her tears flowing, he feels hurt as if each and every drop is coming from him. When he envisions her telling him she is going out of his life forever it's as if he has been stabbed in the heart. His breath has been taken away. Why do I care so much that she leaves? He asks himself. He doesn't even want to think about it. Why, he asks, why? How Can I Feel This Way? The water continues to pour without him realizing.
GH- Payal is cooking asks Kushi for the butter and Kushi is just rolling, rolling, rolling the roti without even hearing her. Her mind is elsewhere, on HIM, that demon, again! She sees him falling on top of her in the store room where they were so close they could feel each other's breath. She tenses as she remembers him standing so close to her that she could smell his scent like sandalwood and musk. He was sternly insisting he had to speak to her'"let me finish!" and finally the tone of the images changes and she sees him gently handing her dupatta over her shoulder with his eyes facing the floor. He made her feel comfortable. How can this demon be like that? One minute a beast and the next a Knight in Shining Armor. How Can I Feel This Way? Payal taps her on the shoulder, she jumps saying "yes, I got the tickets, our train leaves tonight."
The plant is saturated by the overflowing water; Anjali comes and asks ASR what he is thinking about. How Can I Feel This Way? "Nothing." Anjali tells her to come and sit with her. She asks him what happened, why does he look so worried. Does it have anything to do with Lavanya? His answer is always, "Di, please." She continues that she hasn't pushed the issue and all she wants to know is if he is happy? He answers, "With whom?" Who do you think Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada that she is going to say Kushi? Nooo, Lavanya silly. "How do you feel about Lavanya coming to this house? Everyone has agreed, but you how do you feel about it?" He looks down. He tells her he hasn't thought about it. She tells him he should think about it and it's an important decision. She asks him if he is doing this to prove Nani wrong. He gets insulted, "You think I would do that?" She says, "Hah." "Di, please!" "Chote when you were a kid you had a huge ego. " He narrowly looks at her. "Why are you looking at me like that? I know that if someone challenges you, you don't like that at all. Anyway when you get angry your brain doesn't think clearly and you make the worst decisions which you then regret." "Enough, Di!" Too close to the truth for comfort, hey ASR? "I don't take all my decisions with my ego, (No?) and this is my life and nobody should interfere in it, especially if it is a big decision in my life. I will always say that Lavanya is the right girl for me. (Not really) She always listens to me and I am not interested in marriage. She understands me", (true). Anjali asks but what about him, does he understand himself? He just looks at her. Maybe she has a point.
GH- Payal asks Kushi why she looks so worried and why does she want to leave and go to Lucknow so fast. She says she always does what she wants to do and Kushi agrees. The phone rings and Kushi goes to answer it.
RM- Di and ASR are still in conversation. Di tells him that these decisions should be taken by the heart and not the mind. ASR apologises and says that that's what makes them so different. He doesn't make emotional decisions. Anjali reminds him that when you love someone the decision comes from the heart. "You do not love someone if you do calculations. Love happens when it is ready. When you see the person, the one you love and your eyes are fixed on her." He pictures Kushi in the red saree, how beautiful she looked and how he couldn't take his eyes off of her. "If she feels sad you don't feel good at all. Every thought of them going away from you grieves you. He hears Kushi saying, "Then be happy because I will go away from you forever. I will go to Lucknow forever!" How Can I Feel This Way? He looks away, sighs, regroups, pull yourself together man and says "Di, I don't want to waste my time on these things." He gets up and Di grabs his hand. "Someday, one day you WILL waste time on this because'" "Yeah Di, I know, because someday there will be girl that when I look at her I will forget everything that happens around me after she appears, etc. etc. etc. Right? Can I go now? Oh, and one more thing, if such a girl appears before me, I will stay away from her because I will live my life not from my heart but from my mind!" Di answers him, "No Chote you will not be able to do that." Why he asks. "Because, if you stay away from her you will not be able to breathe." ASR pinches himself, as if he is dreaming this, "You are unbelievable! Di, you would stop breathing? I'll leave now"'.she is crazy he thinks. Anjali is very frustrated by her Chote!
GH- Kushi is talking on the phone with her mother who tells her everything about the loss of their store. Kushi is upset. She tells Payal that they should go to Lucknow ASAP. What are they going to do, they don't know but they will find a way to help.
Lavanya's apartment- ASR walks in and Lavanya tells him how happy she is that they will be living together. ASR says he wants to tell her something and she quickly says that she knows what he wants to say that they can't really stay together. He says relax, Lavanya. I want to tell you something, she looks worried, and he says my car is not parked in a good place so you have to hurry. Her face totally relaxes and she hugs him, "Oh, God I was scared. ASR I don't completely understand, I mean sometimes'.ASR do you really love me? I came to take you with me, actually we should hurry. She walks away from him mid sentence. He becomes irate he hears Kushi. He grabs her and turns her around. "When I talk to you, do not leave until I am finished. I want to tell you something. Lavanya apologizes and said she just wanted to get her bag. "What did you want to tell me?" He grabs her luggage, "Let's go." How Can I Feel This Way?
GH- Girls are packing and Buaji is sad. Payal sees her dress and is reminded of her broken marriage. She believes this is all her fault after all they took out the mortgage on the shop for her dowry and wedding and then it was canceled. Kushi says not to worry no guilt feelings either. They were lucky to have found out about Abishek and his family. "Tears, tears, tears do you girls think that if you spill many tears they can pay your parents debts?", Asks Buaji. She explains to the girls that going to their father's home will only put more stress and worry on their father. Two more mouths to feed. She says they are very much like their father both stubborn. Even if your father opens a small shop he will be worried about you girls. How will he handle the store and take away your tears. She asks Payal what Shyam has said about getting Kushi a job. You can get a good job with Shyam. Kushi quickly says she wants to be with her parents. Buaji says with Shyam's help we can find a solution to this problem.
Anjali and Shyam are in the kitchen and he asks if he cut the potatoes the exact measurements she wants. She says he is teasing her. She understands very well. He says you think he can tease his queen. He goes to taste the food she is making and she stops him, it may be hot. She blows on the food and feeds him. She then leaves to give Nani her meds. Shyam's phone rings'it's Kushi, 'Hello? Yes, I was just thinking about you, Kushi.' How Can I Feel This Way? He sees Anjali's reflection, Anjali is behind him'.
Hey Cynthia.
Love the titile as always..In red yes how could a man be so beasty if he takes care of these fragile plants.
There was no doubt La did understand him very well.
In black underlined...He was in a very confused and sticky situation while Di was talking about Love..
In brown That was the most yummy scene ever .His smile and expressions were just KILLING>>>>
he lay there in deep sleep. then her voice. she's going... forever. no, you can't go like that... khushi, khushiii. 
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