So, belatedly even if, I just got done reading chapter 1 and the debate that has ensued from the reader comments. Personally I think I stand apart from the majority here. Because Gulaal to me was never unreal - whatever else she was. I would not deny that more detailing could have been lent to her transition under the circumstance of a show extension, or more importantly Talli space reduction - but limited or not, her portrayal was justified to me in all means.
Trying to take one thing at a time - and somehow this takes me back to the Friday debate just before the Sunday ME finale which ends the show - because a major Gulaal debate had ensued between two contradicting thoughts even then.
Anyway. So like Aditi said, the difference between Gulaal and Rano lies in the essential basis of being self aware, or in denial. The interesting, and sadly self cursed, part of being in denial is that the longer and harder we try to be in that state, the more alibis we come up with for self conviction of the same. So countering Aditi's second part of the comment - about Gulaal's inability to distinguish between Dushyant's lust and kesar's love - I say that at that given point of time, she never actually allowed herself to even explicitly think out that distinction. Her focus at that point was not Dushyant. Not in comparison. Not in individuality. Her focus was Kesar, his confession, and the repercussion she faced with it. Just at that point, in being blatantly faced with the impossible weight of her once upon a time well intended but recklessly impulsive decision came crushing down on her - and if she did not or could not think straight through it, well, very few people, if any, can! Her first reaction obviously had to be repulsion in feeling violated, and a strong defense mode. In striving for which she tried to shun Kesar - a task he made exceedingly possible - cold shoulder him - to make him feel guilty because subconsciously or otherwise it was her only power to exert at that time - and of course, accuse him of lustful intention - because was there any other way she could justify her sense of violation to even herself if she was going to believe his love was pure? There's a very innate element of lust which results in a sense of violation in general - and for Gulaal, it became the easiest explanation. Kesar in his place may have been very rightly appalled by how she could expect him to be lustful of all things. But for Gulaal, it was at least transiently a very evident reactive conclusions.
Truth was, her repulsion had a very strong self basis. It lay almost if not entirely in even allowing the thought of anyone replacing Vasant in her life be spelled or thought. Ever since Kesar returns, the whole "hubby-wife" situation makes her greatly uneasy. The only solace she has is initially on how KT bond (which she thinks is in accordance with her plan) and when Kesar ceases to be anything else, but her Kesar. When he serves her, obeys her, indulges her, protects her - despite the changed face and fact of their equation, it is a sneak peak of the kavachh he once was, as a kid, not as a husband. And personally I think, Gulaal doesn't start off with a wrong argument. When she tells him it is lagaav and not pyaar - from her POV, it is the most accurate conclusion to arrive at - something that, but for our awareness and subjectivity for Kesar's predicament - we would actually agree with, or at least empathize with far more, if we considered her case in objectivity. What compels her to backlash at Kesar with all the "lust" comments is in fact, his own wrongly implemented approach - and there is no denying of that! If she felt intruded upon with his confession, his force to get her back with himself only causes her to feel more violated, and further on the defensive/offensive.
I remember saying somewhere in the last week - and I think this was in the Friday debate - how for Gulaal, the denial in accepting Kesar always did stem from the fear that she would be replacing Vasant. After the initial shock of his confession, she progressively finds one reason or the other to shun him, keep him at a distance, and mostly, stay in denial. There may be no justification for her attitude, but for, like Aditi said, an individual compulsion to remain in denial. When she finally does begin to recognize the shift in herself, in what she has with Kesar from her side, she is washed over by the double impact of the weight of such a futile denial, and the fresh guilt of betraying Vasant. At this point, she runs out of all pretend reasons to hide behind, and stay in denial. Except the real reason which has never allowed her to give Kesar and herself a fair chance. Vasant. If she has been butt headed about tying herself to Vasant - fine she has been. To me that is not unreal in a person - because when you think about it, Kesar is no less butt headed. The way he holds onto a grudge as a mere 10 year old, unto a decade later - a grudge we all know he "names as injustice to his brother" but truly holds as "being betrayed by Gulaal" - it can be just as unreal. But it isn't, because that is how Kesar is.
As for the parallel between Rano and Gulaal - I honestly think eventually acceptance should have been easier in Gulaal's case than Rano's. To me if someone is a little hard to stomach, it's Rano's self awareness. Because in her case, apart from the fear of replacing her first husband, she has every moment of all those years she has groomed and raised him from boy to man to come back to her, when her role shifts from guardian to wife. For Gulaal, it is only the memories of a 10 year old, and then straight to a decade ahead. While it causes her to hold onto an image of "child Kesar" it also doesn't imprint her indelibly with 10 years of guardianship in an active manner - and I think the chance of her acceptance being easier or harder in this case that Aditi takes on is an equal probability scenario - depending on how you can justify your take on how it could be!
Phew - I know this got long. But well - old debates being raised back to life on Gulaal can never end 😆 To Piyu's tag of Holier than Thou - I think Gulaal was more of a compulsive self-checklist person, someone who didn't know how to deal with going wrong on her own set yardstick - than a worldly defined idealist. In fact, as we have often said, given her streak of rebellion and some loud steps in contrary, she can hardly be termed Holier than Thou. What gets her feeling so violated by the very idea of replacing Vasant is not righteousness, as much as what she feels for him, the extent of it, and how she wants to hold on to it till the end of time - fearing any kind of outsider (Kesar included) could change that balance and cause her intangible hold onto Vasant slip out of her hand!
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Aditi - for the 2nd chapter, I'm personally more than glad to know the next update is already there and I'm not going to be left hanging at that point 😲 😆 I like how you've coursed through this thus far, and to the best of my ability, I'm reading this SS with the sole idea of reading your take, and your justification of it. Because like I said, I think this is a predicament that can be explored in various ways, with various justifications...
So again, I'm glad you gave this a shot, really!
Will read the next part tomorrow morning and be back again!
xx
JZee
kalika.
Itti Si Khushi Sab TV
