Wired Hearts (1)

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mayyo

@mayyo

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

#781

Originally posted by: BDayGal-11Jan
Superb Updt..
Ab Maan ko le aa Mari warna jaan se mar doongi teko 😡

Haaye Allah! Mujhe maar diya toh Maan bilkul nahin aayega! 😆

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mayyo

@mayyo

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 11 years ago

#782

**Replies to your comments begin from page 104.

10. Jo Bheji Thi Dua

Stop the car, Geet!

I can't, Mamma! It's skidding!

Pull it over on the mud, Geet!

Yes, Baba. Aaah!

GEET!!

"Mamma! Baba!" I jolted upright, screaming what I had screamed that fateful day. My breath came in short gasps as I tried to control the violent quivering of my body. I was sweating too, and so much happening at the same time was disorienting me. I reached for the lamp switch with shaking hands, toppling something placed on the bedside table onto the floor. It was the photo frame I had placed beside the lamp on my bedside table, I saw when I finally managed to switch the light on.

I picked it up and turned it around to see the beloved faces of my parents smiling at me. That was when my control broke and I couldn't stop the burst of tears which engulfed me. I hugged the frame to my heart and cried. "It was all my fault! I killed them!" The words I had believed in for a year came out of my mouth as I sobbed. "Why didn't I die instead? Why did I survive?" It was a desperate question I had asked myself countless times since I gained consciousness after that accident.

When the sobbing subsided a bit, I pulled my knees to my chest, placed the picture on the bedside table, put my cheek on my knees and stared at the picture. The tears were still nowhere stopping. It was the nightmare I had had every few nights since the accident. I had lost count of many times it had woken me up in the middle of the night, and every time I woke up like this, I wished for my parents to be there with me, to tell me it was just a bad dream, to hug me and console me, to put me back to sleep by running fingers through my hair.

But the part which hurt the most was, it wasn't any nightmare. It was the truth of my life, the truth which I was responsible for, the harsh truth which had snatched my parents away from me and put them to eternal sleep.

As hard as I squeezed my eyes shut, I couldn't wipe away the picture playing in them. Giving up, I let my mind lead me back to that day, to the moment I had opened my eyes to find myself in a white room, dazed and disoriented, bandaged and plastered. The first question which left my mouth for the nurse was how my parents were.

"Ma'am, you just relax. I'll call the doctor." She had said professionally, easily ignoring my question which I repeated forcefully, a fear gripping my heart. I had felt breathing become difficult for me when I had asked my question for the third time and she'd loudly called for the doctor. A moment later, I had seen a nurse and a doctor enter the room, closely followed by Raya, who rushed to my side as the doctor examined the machines.

"Raya, how are Mamma and Baba? Where are they? Why aren't they here?" I had held onto her hand tightly, begging her to tell me but my head felt heavier. I could hear the doctor saying something like sedated and calm down and then everything blackened out.

It was only when I had woken up again from the fog of sedatives that I had found Raya silently weeping with her head in her hands. I had asked my questions again and I had demanded to meet my parents when she'd unsuccessfully tried to wipe her tears and calm me down.

"Okay, okay, Di. Calm down, please, just relax. I'll tell you where they are. You just calm down." She had smoothened my hair while I tried to oblige. It was immensely hard to breathe normally when the worry for Mamma and Baba was all I could feel.

"I need you to stay here for a few minutes. The doctor needs to check up on you." I started shaking my head but she cupped my cheek. "Please, Di! I promise I'll take you to Mamma and Baba with me. Just a few minutes."

She had begun to leave but I had held onto her hand and pleaded her to stay so she'd asked the on-duty nurse to call the doctor.

"Di..." She had spoken in a low voice when the doctor left. "Mamma is comatose." I had gasped at this piece of information and my breathing had started to pick up pace again. She hadn't tried to calm me down this time.

"And Baba? Where is he? How is he?" I heard her sniff and it was only then that I really saw her puffy red eyes. "Raya, tell me, please!" She had just shook her head slightly and begun sobbing in a low voice with one of my hands wrapped in both of hers.

"They couldn't save him, Di! They couldn't save him!" It hadn't sunk in at first. I had felt the room begun to shake and I had stared at Raya's shaking body with empty eyes for long enough for her to raise her head and look at me worriedly. "Di?" I had not responded and she had shaken me slightly, calling out a little louder.

"No!" I whispered. "This is not true." Raya's face scrunched even more as I heard a loud sob escape her chest. It was only then that I saw Raunaq come up behind Raya and embrace her. "Raunaq, this is not, true, right? Tell me Raya is trying to make a sick joke!"

I had seen his eyes fill up at my words as he shook his head when Raya turned back to me. "No Di!" She had almost shouted. "This is no joke! This is no joke." Her voice had mellowed down until it was a quivering whisper. "This is no joke."

It all came down crashing on me. I had lost my father, my mother was on the verge of losing her life, it was all because of me. Tears had begun to collect in my eyes and slide down my cheeks. I cried and cried until I could shed no more tears.

"It's all my fault. This is all my fault!" I whispered and saw Raya shaking her head.

"Don't say that, Di! It wasn't your fault. It was an accident."

"I never should have insisted them for coming along. I am responsible for this!" I had kept whispering in a hoarse voice.

"No, Di! Don't -"

"I want to see them." I cut her off. I knew I was responsible for this.

A sob escaped my throat when I recalled the pale faces of my parents. My father hadn't survived the accident in the first place but my mother left the world only two days after failing to recover from her comatose condition. It was a terrible time filled with darkness and grief surrounding me. I had prayed countless times for the impossible, I had tried to fight what had already happened and I had wished to die just so I could be with my parents. But every prayer I had sent had gone unheard, every desire unfulfilled. A childish obstinacy to go for a long drive on the rainy evening had turned my life upside down.

Raya had stayed with me for two months until I had recovered completely. G had come to stay with us for some time too but she had to go back to her kids, who she had left behind and it was Raya and me again with Raunaq gone too. At times when I had felt conscious enough to notice things around me, I had seen Raya worrying about me, I had seen her crying and I had seen her wilting in the grief. I had to be strong for her and put on a facade so when I had physically healed enough to do my own chores, I sent her to Raunaq. She had a husband to take care of and I forced her to go to him even when she insisted on staying with me or taking me along.

I didn't want to be a third wheel in her married life. I wanted them to live their life the way they had for the previous three years of their marriage. I had to live alone, for that was what was meant to be.

I got off the bed and walked to the small balcony. It was close to the time that I usually woke up. It was dreams like these which had forced me to deduct my sleeping time to an extreme extent. But I had gotten used to it now. I had gotten used to staying up nights and moping in my grief in person, and then wear a mask of life on my face and be strong for my younger sister. It was what life was for me now.

**I really really hope this chapter does not affect you all the way it affected me!

11. Chhoti

Edited by mayyo - 11 years ago

100

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KittuPratzz

@KittuPratzz

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#783

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference."

"Death ends a life, not a relationship."

"Stupidity isn't punishable by death. If it was, there would be a hell of a population drop."

I cant help but im in this zone...where geet resides... is it easy to live life like that? nah..its not.. one can just imagine...or may feel a lil ...but living through to it..is all together different.

why did i start my comment with these quotes? coz U dint leave me with any choice...if i have to describe ..how i feel ..right this moment...either it will b an understatement..or i may not completely justify the emotion u evoked in me...

I was listening to 4 songs..all through the chapter..and tell me how you would feel..

1.Kal ho na ho..heart beat instrumental.

2.Aye khuda from murder.

3.aashiqui instrumental

4.Tu ne jo na kaha...from newyork...

Marvelled ... the way you made me feel!! 👏 🤗

I was just beginning to think...what will be the next chapter... her meeting with him...

or any revelations...

Be it she hugging the frame or her memory (*or can i say the scar...which will never fade...but just gives pain...) that unpleasant moment...that dreadful evening ...everything is snatched...

and she blaming herself... one cannot understand that pain...until one actually gone through... how painful it is to be left alone...when ur most precious thing is lost... you cannot see them..feel them..embrace them... blame urself..scold urself..and wanted to kill urself...can it be more painful when u r the witness for loved ones suffering? *shudders*

"It was all my fault! I killed them!"

"Why didn't I die instead? Why did I survive?" It was a desperate question I had asked myself countless times since I gained consciousness after that accident.

I had lost count of many times it had woken me up in the middle of the night, and every time I woke up like this, I wished for my parents to be there with me, to tell me it was just a bad dream, to hug me and console me, to put me back to sleep by running fingers through my hair.

But the part which hurt the most was, it wasn't any nightmare. It was the truth of my life, the truth which I was responsible for, the harsh truth which had snatched my parents away from me and put them to eternal sleep.

@italic... 👏 i can't praise u enough mayyo...u just moved me..with just few lines...

nostalgia trip...in the middle of night..u just wake up..and wish...only wish that what ever happened was a night mare... a bad dream... but this conscious mind...reminds YOU ..what u did..and what actually happened...

As hard as I squeezed my eyes shut, I couldn't wipe away the picture playing in them.

how much ever we try...try hard..we cannot...or shall i say we dont want to..coz a part of us wanted to live in this hell...this punishment...

coming to this 2nd quote... it ended her two most dear relationships...but not the love...but alas...can she taste the love now?? except..live in the memories... love never dies... yet we cannot stop craving for loved ones presence!!!

the convo...*sigh* *looks at the screen ...grimace...* it exactly happened with me...but with different context...i dint loose anyone... but i still blame myself for the hurt i caused..for each scar...every moment of my life..

You know what iss the worst punishment? its not loosing ur loved ones...its witnessing the loss and u living the life with guilt...which cannot be shared..nor taken off ur shoulders...

You are too good ...and way beyond awesome person!

I got off the bed and walked to the small balcony. It was close to the time that I usually woke up. It was dreams like these which had forced me to deduct my sleeping time to an extreme extent. But I had gotten used to it now. I had gotten used to staying up nights and moping in my grief in person, and then wear a mask of life on my face and be strong for my younger sister. It was what life was for me now.

i dint know that i wrote such a longg one...sorry for my rambles mayyo...

as i said earlier...i connect with geet... its like seeing my mirror image...my twin..and feeling the same pain...yet being happy too... ...how weird that sounds? Nah...but yeah..life itself is weird... a labyrinth... which will never solve until we rest...

Ur words..and the songs ...have altogether different sensation...

Thanks for sharing it...

ohh no sorry for such stupid baseless comment!!!

3rd quote... is for the stupidity...

as our world is filled with two infinities... universe..and human stupidity... we hurt ourselves...kill ourselves... for the sin we committed...but thats the easiest way to wipe off the sin we did to our loved ones...

and as my comment is to end...i listen to "Toh phir aao..." here comes my memory...

PS:ignore my mishtakesss😆 😆 many grammatical errors...

Edited by KittuPratzz - 11 years ago

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6n6s6k6i6r6a6n6

@6n6s6k6i6r6a6n6

Sparkler

Posted: 11 years ago

#784

Geet's parents died in an accident...and she is blaming herself for the accident...

I don't understand one thing is that if Geet is elder sister then why younger sister get married and elder one is still single...it is not that elder sister always has to marry first but from the prequel of this story it seems that Geet's family and Geet are some orthodox in nature so obviously her parents will want her to get married first...

very emotional update...

thanx for pm...

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Padfoot_Prongs

@Padfoot_Prongs

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 11 years ago

#785

😭poor geet.😒

BTW this song is my all time fav- jo bheji thi dua wo jaake aasma se yu takra gayi ki laut ke aa gayi sada.

Edited by mannu_minnie - 11 years ago

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Pooja Verma

@impoojaverma

Rocker

Posted: 11 years ago

#786

geet wasn't at fault for her parents death it was to be happen any how

superb update

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Muskan

@muskanp

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 11 years ago

#787

I had assumed this bit

But t way u penned it down 😭
Every word just pierced right through my heart
I could so feel the breaking of her with every night
The darkness consuming her every time
Her cuddled up in a bundle crying fighting 😭

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Muskan

@muskanp

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 11 years ago

#788

Read ur response
Interesting
Yah kind of get it

Possible things do change as we grow
Conflict of views
As we grow we tend to be more sting with our POVs

More over it's not easy to let some one in that easily

I guess it will be a more of a fun reading them

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Muskan

@muskanp

Sparkler

+ 8

Posted: 11 years ago

#789

I guess they will be also learning how their heart are still wired unknown to them 😳

Edited by muskanp - 11 years ago

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893213

Hibernated

Posted: 11 years ago

#790

Very intense and emotional part. it is very hard to forget and forgive ourselves, especially for someone close to us. For Geet the bond was the closest imaginable. She is living with guilt when it was an accident. This puts a different spin on her character. There is the depth of pain that she has experienced that makes her almost raw in my opinion. Vulnerable, broken but with a spirit to continue to do her best in the day. It is the night which is hardest when the mind goes down those paths again and again.

Beautifully written again. Falling for each facet of everyone shown here. The strength of Raya, you put character in that character which was just for fun in iOYSM. Raunaq though not fully revealed is her strength.

Thanks for updating.

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