PART-1
It has been 2 months to my marriage and these days changed my life entirely. I still remember the day I got married. I was nervous as well as excited. Used to feel jittery in my stomach when I used to think of our names together, Maan-Geet, and just his name used to fill my heart with so many emotions, which I did not know at that time would be crumpled so badly and that loneliness would be my companion for this life. The night which would have marked a togetherness of our relation was when I learned the truth of it. The moment where I thought the respect, love and understanding would be sowing a seed is when I learned that there is no future to this marriage.
Maan's words of that night still ring in my ears…
Past
Ours was an arranged marriage. Maan's parents brought this proposal as they saw me when they visited our place, Hoshiarpur, for attending a wedding. They liked me for their son. My parents were elated with this proposal and immediately agreed knowing for sure that I would not say no to them. Well, they were true. I can never deny them as I know they do everything for my good and even I was happy with it. I just saw his pic, never met him as its in our tradition. With both the family consent, we were tied in a spiritual relationship called marriage.
That night I was waiting for him in our room, a room which will witness a flower blossoming with love and its warmth, but when he came it witnessed the death of it before its existence itself.
Maan: Listen, I don't know who you are and what you expect with this relationship.
Geet's thoughts: I was confused as to he doesn't know me and I think he understood my thoughts by my face, which was somewhat visible through the veil, as he told me…
Maan: Yes, I don't know you. I haven't seen you till now and don't even wish to. I want to make one thing very, very clear that this marriage means nothing to me. I married you just because of my parents, because I can't see my grandmother in pain and so ill and who could have been better with my one "yes" for this marriage and they are the only reasons for this relationship, and I have nothing to give to you, and there are no chances of at least trying as I am in love with someone else and can't think of my life without her.
Geet: During all this, I was sitting with one hope of at least maybe I can win his heart as the time goes by but his last words just destroyed all my hopes, dreams, desires to be loved by someone very special, everything, and I turned shocked, numb and blank. Well, he didn't even bother to see my reaction as he just left me to face it.
I couldn't say a word as my throat was choked already with the truth. I was left alone to support myself where I was trying to digest the bitter truth of my life, the death of my heart's utmost desire, crushing of the hope of a love-filled life, with just the dark night and my tears by my side with a broken heart in my hands. I was sobbing silently without the care about the time, things or anything for that matter until I heard a hard knock of the door with a voice asking me to get ready for leftover rituals indicating me the beginning of loneliness from that day
During rituals, I was glancing to his side trying still to find at least a hint of all this being a bad dream, but who the hell was I kidding, he didn't even bother to look at me for once or try to understand my pain, but yet again bringing home the fact that he just got nothing to do with me or this marriage.
Now I am in room watching my reflection and asking it am I that ugly, asking my fate am I that unlucky, asking myself now what next. At the same moment, he came in and I was thinking is there anything left, but thanks for small mercies I guess, she thought with a sarcastic laugh for herself.
Maan: ermm..umm..woh…
Geet: Understanding his discomfort for staying here long and not knowing how to address her, told him with a low voice….Geet
Maan (startled but yet composing himself says): oh…Geet. Well, I wanted to let you know that you will accompany me to Delhi as I don't want to stress dadimaa anymore and u can do whatever you want once you are there and hope you will not interfere in my life the same way.
And with my nod, he asked me to get ready as we will be leaving the same day or say that night.
Present
And here I am alone with my family, wishes, village left beyond.
I just couldn't let myself to tell my parents the truth of my life as they will be heartbroken, the respect they earned all these years being washed away in a moment making them more weak emotionally. I just can't see them so dejected and guilty for destroying my life. I know they won't be bothered about what society would say and all, but I can't see them dying bit by bit seeing me, their life, so broken and vulnerable as I couldn't forget my love, my life, Maan…..yes I love him, always have from the moment I saw his photo…maine unhe mann hi mann apna manliya, apna sab kuch…apna pyaar, dost aur bhagwan.
Despite of everything, I couldn't deny the fact that he truly is in love which I understood with the sincerity and glow on his face when he said he is in love that night. This feeling does bring a little peace to my heart knowing that love still exists, though what if it is not in my life….with this fact I am now trying to engulf this cool breeze of the night to prepare myself for another ride of same thoughts till I fell into slumber.
hope you all like it...please leave your views
Edited by Cherishh - 12 years ago
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
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