SwaRon OS: Having you by my side

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#51

Originally posted by: Sawyer_Tom
Beautiful concept Rutu. Really beautiful.

And the way you portrayed the emotions touched my heart. So intensely, so masterfully was it written that you forced us to feel the pain that was the running theme of this OS. You should take up writing tragic stories. You'd excel in it. You have it in you.

Of course I'm not begrudging you for the happy ending. It would have seemed too cruel and a good many people would have formed a line to murder you in the most torturous way possible. But rest assured I wouldn't be among them. But needless to say, I liked the OS with its happy ending and all and the pain was described just too piercingly by you. Very well written I must say.

Feels good to hear that you were able to feel the pain as shown in the update. My work done there. You aptly pointed out, Yes I connect more to intense sad stories, they seem more realistic. Just my view.

In red, oh yes I could imagine the kind of threatenings the intense SwaRon readers would have given me for the sad ending😆 and so I decided to change the end.

Thanks for the review Nidhi😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#52

Originally posted by: marauder
Sometime you come across works after reading which at once one doesn't have anyword to describe what they are feeling at the moment. They are simply too awestruck by the beauty of the piece to say anything else. This is one such work. I don't know what to say about this magnificient work of yours. Just too good.

First of all just loved the plot of this OS. It was really heart touching. And the way you expressed the pain of Sharon and Swayam was just moving. Their effort to face the hardship the life has forced on them, the pain, the love everything was just amazingly done. And little metaphores like the flower one was aptly used. I just loved the precison with which you have gone through this OS. Pain may be the theme of this OS but its end speaks about life in a grand manner. The end was really good.

Thanks for the flattery comment Shishir. Glad you liked the theme as well as the end. It could have been a sad end although, but considering the consequences I changed it.I just couldn't leave them in pain, cause that would have made me a sadist.

Edited by Rutu - 12 years ago

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#53

Originally posted by: mrash
This is sooo cute.

Thanks a ton for the comment😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#54

Originally posted by: neetha
rutu i loved it gal..👏.it had pain,love n happiness..n every other related emotions blended beautifully.👍🏼.every bit of the os was so heart touchin..❤️aww swaron baby..m soo waitin fr it😳n loved swayam's idea of makin a footloose team😆

Thanks for the comment Neetha, glad you liked it😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#55

Originally posted by: shaani2209
Rutu This was immensely beautiful OS...
the way you have penned it down just touched my heart...i loved each and every portrayal of emotions...the part where the pink soft flower moment, it depicted the whole concept of the OS in a small part...
the way they be with each other through out and the relationship that bonded between them was beautiful to read...
it was a pleasant read rutu...thank you so much for this...the concept really touched my heart...
thanks for the pm...

Yes the flower part was a little display of the whole theme and the very fact that SwaRon were together amidst all these depicts how they are really meant to be together.

Thanks for the comment Rosh😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#56

Originally posted by: surbhimathur
Res :)
*edited*

Rutu it was amazingly beautiful! 👏
I loved the concept! ❤️

The park and the bench scene was especially the best and my favourite part! 😳
Wen u described grass as thorns and the bench scene where a pink flower flew away from sharon's grip but swayam brought it back! 😃
Their understanding was beautifully portrayed by you when sharon caressesed swayam's back! 👍🏼
And then the ending was lovelyy! 😊

The bench scene na, I know my favourite part too. You pointed out the theme of this OS aptly.

Thanks for the comment Surbhi😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#57

Originally posted by: meevee
Rutu this was so pure...a tragedy of this enormity culd hav done only two things to them, either drifted them apart or strengthened the bond, thank u for not making them indulge in a blame game... coz that wuld hav only hurted more both of them...beautifully mature the way u showed how Swayam enveloped her with the strength of his luv and did not let her wallow in depression and brought her bac to life...at the same time, also liked how u showed Sharon rallying around to respond to his efforts and thinking abt them in unison and not luking at this as a personal loss - finally their mutual faith in the luv of the other brought them the joy they deserved - the reference to the footloose team lightened the mood at each juncture it was used. There was a a serene harmony of nature with their psychological state at the different stages of the OS...

Kuch hatke tha aur zabardast tha👍🏼

Meera your comments are always supplementary, giving a proper gist of the entire update.

In green, as you said that incident could have been responsible for the bridge in their relation. But the very fact that they both understand and act as a support to each other, gives a new dimension to their relationship. Thanks for the lovely comment😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#58

Originally posted by: nature2
Simply loved the OS !!! It was beautiful... 😉

Thanks a lot, glad you liked it😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#59

Originally posted by: Nirju99
beautiful update dear

Thanks a ton😳

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Phantasm

@Phantasm

Dazzler

+ 2

Posted: 12 years ago

#60

Originally posted by: LoveShantannu
*PERFECT*
it is a perfect peice of writting
It showed all emotions love,pain,hapiness
I guess it was straight frm ur heart dats why it felt to heart touching
Girl hats off for such an amazing piece of work
Swaron will always be my favorite
N dis os will always be one of my favourite in d list of some amazing n perfect os

Yes it was straight from my heart.😳 Glad you liked it. Thanks for the comment

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