Pablo's Muse#2 - AR Part 35(Completed) Sept.1 Pg 51 - Page 25

Originally posted by: fri42911

first of all sorry for late commenting.

awesome parts!!!!!

i am glad arman is fine and recovering fast.

loved the AR romantic scene in the hospital.

i agree with Ananya.

Shanshank should talk to riddhima and at least try to know arman more, before reaching to any decision/conclusion about him.

Originally posted by: prernawaghray

lovely part... so finally the truth is out... n shashank has to deal with it... i hope he doesnt create more than existing problems for them...
n i liked the way ananya defended n supported armaan :)
loved it
update soon

Originally posted by: -Aliya-

oh the long update looks so beautiful ;P as i was reading it, i expected it to stop short at some random point but i gotta say Aria, i'm glad to see more and more longer updates =)

appropiate choice of quote for this chapter btw, i'm sure there is more to discover of these characters

i really liked this chapter: it had humor, little snippets of sweet romance and i definitely liked the interaction between shashank and mrs mallik..that was treat to read. she's definitely not a woman to be messed with especially when it comes to her son.

LOL i have to say that comment riddhima made about the bug made me think of the cliched "rather be a fly on the wall" but i liked your different approach to idle bugs 😆

and atul's comment, even if anjali didn't vocalise her typical "shut up atul" we know it was in her eyes. i lve that you manage to get in little interactions of each character in whatever update you write

superb update Aria, i always look forward to reading your writing. keep up the great work, this ff is coming along really well!

Originally posted by: bushrayou

god it just keeps getting more intense!!!

Part XXXII

Riddima walked cautiously into the study, to find a figure of a forlorn man " sitting on his chair, it wasn't what she was hoping to see because no child likes to see their parents defeated, the moment that shatters their aura of invincibility and brings them down from whatever pedestal you had them up on. To Shashank's credit, it was no act, ever since that conversation with Ananya Malik, his mind had been preoccupied. And even the joy of bringing back Riddhima home had been dampened somewhat by that impending conversation that hovered above him like an evil halo he would have gladly done without. Not one to be able to broach such a topic, he had found ways to avoid it all-together for the duration that Riddhima had been recovering at home. But he knew, in his heart that he would need to talk to her before she headed back to work, ideally that was the deal. But it had been a good few days before he had finally given up in his mind; there was no way he was starting any conversation for the sheer fear of what it was likely to bring to fore. He may have been in denial but he was certainly not ignorant of everything that was happening around him. And so the onus had shifted to Padma to subtly nudge both of them in the right direction.

He gently waved the photo frame of her smiling brother at her, and reclined back on the chair, before Riddhima could say something, "you know there is a void somewhere that nothing fills...the deepest gorge right here inside me and it pricks at the oddest of times, something that even time hasn't healed. So many dreams...that have remained just dreams" he sighed, " an overwhelming defeat that weighs you down emotionally, restrains you physically and slowly saps you dry, till you just be with it because you don't have a choice"

"Dad..." Riddhima was caught off guard but he stopped her before she could continue further, "No please let me say what I have to"

"That morning he didn't want to go to school, I took him to the bus stop and had promised him something...there hasn't been a day in my life since then when I've gone over what happened that morning, if only I'd heeded to his words, maybe he would be here with us"

She meant to say something, he signaled her to let him continue.

"When I see Armaan today, you cannot imagine the pain that cuts through me, knowing very well that it was his father's negligence that took away my own son and that every time I see him, I am reminded of what I lost. There was a part of me that died that day with him. I had hoped for so many things and planned a lifetime together of moments that we would live together, experience and go through but every day after that I have lived with this gnawing resignation that those things will never be fulfilled. I am so grateful that I had you two because if he was all had, I would have lost the will to live through my sorrows. It was because of you two, seeing you learn to walk, talk...and grow up to become the wonderful human brings that you are, that I feel less burdened but even that has an ache untold, but every step you tread and every rise you two make, it hurts somewhere because he missed out on those, because we missed out on those moments, and it's then it hurts the most because simply he is not here with us and I can't seem to get over the hurt of being cheated of what was ours. There are days when I go through the events of that morning, when he had begged me not to send him to school because it was raining, and he wanted to play at home, I wonder, if I had relented whether he would still be here, I blame myself...this guilt of not being able to protect him...and this bigger guilt of being somewhere else when he needed me the most, being in surgery elsewhere...I couldn't save my own son, I felt like there was no point to being a doctor at that point but then your mother showed me the light, made me realize that we still had two blessings to be grateful of, to take care of, and to love and nurture to the best of our ability...I don't want you getting hurt but when I see that question in your eyes today... I don't know how to make it possible. I see him, and all I can think of is that moment when I rushed into that OT to find him slumped over that table...and I see his son...and every time I do, I realize what I missed out on, your brother would have been the same age..."

Effectively silenced before she could say her piece; each word was like a nail to the coffin - she knew there was no easy way out, no miraculous solutions only hard choices. It was unnerving. There was only one direction this conversation was headed, and she didn't like it already. Evidently to her surprise, he wasn't done yet, "I have never been the one to force my decisions on any one Riddhima, let alone the two of you " you two are all I have in the truest sense " and there is nothing more precious to me than your happiness. But I will be honest with you, I don't know if I'm ready to accept what you are asking for. I cannot stop you Riddhima, I will not " but I see that look in your eyes...and I don't know if I am ready for it..."

Riddhima closed her eyes as each of his words dawned on her, slithering through her " the moment she had feared and had been running away from ever since, was there knocking at her doorstep; she had to take a call. It wasn't going to be an easy choice. Shashank had played his cards well, using the biggest weapon he had " he was emotionally weakening her resolve, he knew it was wrong, but he wasn't ready to accept defeat yet.

Riddhima nodded and got up, "Why does it have to be either or...and not both?"

He did not respond right away, "It depends, where you stand" He still had issues confronting her straight away.

"Apparently in the middle..." and with that she walked away towards the door, her steps heavy, her mind numb with a full realization. There was no point in saying anything more.

"Where are you going?"

Without looking back at him, "I need to be by myself for a while, I will be at Muskaan's..." And she turned around to look at him, "I am not selfish Dad...but I need this time to figure out where..." she paused to notice the flicker of fear in his face that her words had stirred so changed course promptly, "to figure out...things"

They watched her being driven away, "why didn't you stop her Shashank?"

"Let her go Padma, let her go", He sighed and walked back to his room.

"Is it fair on her?"

"It's not about what's fair or not, it's about what is right...and what is wrong?"

"And who gets to decide what is right and what is not?"

He just shrugged her off and went back to his room.

"You know very well what I mean Shashank" she made him face her, "how can you be so heartless knowing very well your daughter loves that boy?"

"She is in love with him?"

Shashank didn't miss that look of surprise "Obviously you never got there...why you couldn't just hear her out for once Shashank, why do you fear the truth so much?"

He stood silent, after all these years of being together; they had both learnt to read each other's silence. So she continued, "she broke down a few days ago, and told me everything..."

"Everything...?" he finally looked back suddenly defenseless as if his worst fears were coming true, no he was not ready for it yet, everything about him screamed that fact.

"This was the first time she opened up to me after the plane accident...and everything that has happened since then..." she stopped to gauge his reaction to her revelations, "including how Armaan has been a major part ever since...I had asked her to come to you tonight but it seems like you did not listen"

He did not respond. She was getting annoyed by his silence; this was not a time for denial.

"Do you want to lose her too Shashank?"

And that's when he looked up at her, his eyes a panic stricken plea...and a fear. Of course he did not want to lose her but all these years...and Amar...how could things be undone!

"I will talk to her tonite Padma..."

"No..."she was firm in her response, "let her do the talking...hear her out, remember our priorities are these two girls, every bitter pill is worth their happiness...even if means owning up to our selves or letting go..."

"Letting go?"

"Yes, letting go of ego that has held you hostage for all these years and not let you see what has transpired in front of your own eyes. You have been so enshrined in your own suffering that you have been woefully oblivious to other people's pain, that is not the man I had fallen in love with, not the man I had married...not the man who took in an orphan child and brought her up as his own..."

"Padma! Don't bring that up ever again!!" She closed her eyes because she knew exactly what she was playing with, this was one fact they had both vowed never to bring up, unfortunately Anjali had stumbled upon the truth unknowingly, and if they had their way, Riddhima would never come across it.

" God knows I have been silent for too long...have you ever realized how their family has broken off after ... Our loss is something even I will never get over but what has happened to them? Do you even know how Amar neglected his own son after you hurled all those accusations at him, after he broke down, his family fell apart ...he got into that nasty affair and drove his wife away with their son? May be everyone has paid their share of due...if this can bring the family together or mend broken lives, may be you must relent. I cannot force you but please give this a thought...I don't want to lose anyone anymore."

He did not say a word, still. And so Padma had one last parting plea, "I don't want to lose her Shashank, they are grown adults, and we cannot cage them forever. I think the best we can do is come to terms with reality and accept what has happened...for her happiness. It's not worth anything, if these two girls are not happy, neither will we ever be. There is no point to anything after that"

It was around nine in the evening and Riddhima wasn't back yet, Shashank who had been on edge the entire day following their conversation started growing evermore restless. And she couldn't have been at work either because she wasn't back to work yet. The anxious father knew she should have been home but she wasn't, and it meant there was something wrong. He had called her numerous times and had even texted her with carefully chosen words hinting at some sort of reconciliation but to no avail, Riddhima Gupta had gone incognito. His worst fears realized when the driver returned home her empty car. He knew he lost the battle at that moment. It was like a bad omen that made him sick to his very core.

"Padma?" he turned to her seeking answers, "Give her some time Shashank" Suddenly he felt like he had aged in the last few hours alone.

"I'll talk to her Shashank, please stop worrying..." but even Padma could not shake that ominous thought from her mind.

Part 33 - 11/24/12 - Pg 38

awesome update...!:)..will wait for d next one!

Lovely part.

Thanks for PM.

Update soon...

Very nice part. You have done complete justice to everyone's emotions and it clearly shows how subtly but surely you are bringing all involved together. Awesome writing.
Rt

Why did u stop at such a moment dear?
It's not fair to leave us on a cliffhanger.
I wonder what decision Riddhima has made.
I knew she must be at Pablo's Muse.
shanky has emotionally blackmailed her.
Loss of his son was terribel but it does not mean that AR have to pay a price for it.
I'm glad that Armaan finally found Ridz.
Waiting for the next part eagerly.
I hope u may update soon.

The loss of a child is a terrible, terrible loss that a parent has to go through. One never really recuperates from it completely. It is a void nothing can fill, not even the other child. And Shashank is right in feeling whatever he does. Ofcourse he has to have a huge huge heart to accept AR's relationship. It will be a nightmare for any parent to accept someone in the family a glimpse of whom will always remind him of the child he lost.
Very well written, the emotions of the father are very well brought out. Good job.

Love
Shveta