wat do kids mean?

I know many people on this forum have kids and many dont have kids, but i wanted to put forth a question that i came across recently. I was talking to a friend of mine who said that he wudn't have kids because he wanted to find meaning in his life without involving his penis and even if he didnt find meaning in his life he wudn't use his semen to cover that up. He said people have kids to avoid asking the major questions about life such as "wat is the purpose for us being here" or "wat are we meant to do with our lives". he said that people live vicariously through their children and try to live out the lives they had wanted, or correct the mistakes they had made, but kids overall are a way to put ur life on hold and give meaning to ur life through something other than ur own life because u r too scared to look for it in ur own life. So I wanted to ask you guys how you felt about his comments.

wow, ur friend sure has a different view on life. I think having children is a way that people find the meaning of why we're truly here, does anyone know of a greater miracle than how a child is born and brought into the world from such a tiny seed to a human being? The meaning of life is what you make it, if he plans on going the same way he does then good for him if he really believes in it.

Well, I don't have kids yet, but I would love to have them one day. Children bring such joy to the world. Your friend is in dilemma. He is saying that people have kids to avoid reality of life. I don't agree with it. Actually having children is a learning process as well. Children learn from you and you learn from children. Raising children is not an easy task and it requires a lot of patience and discipline. Children bring back livelihood and joy in adult life. You can actually re-live your childhood with them. Like Abhijit had mentioned in other topic that he is learning Math again to teach his kids. He wouldn't have done it if he didn't have kids.
May be your friend wants to live like a young adult for the rest of his life. He reminds me of those people who sit and complain but don't do anything about it. May be he is struggling with his own internal fears. He is afraid of taking his responsibilities and he is worried if he can't take care of himself, how would he take care of other life? Purpose of life can be learn along with children.
HOw old is he? Is he following a religion?

Zara , i think we have kids to fill in that emptiness in our life . Yes you can feel absolutely complete living a child free life. But most people feel the desire from within to share their life with. They want to pass on their values , knowledge and share the love they have within for a helpless being. They want to see a reflection of themselves in their little one. They want to re- live their childhood again. They want to build a family. These are some of the reasons to have kids.

Originally posted by: Dazlingflower

Well, I don't have kids yet, but I would love to have them one day. Children bring such joy to the world. Your friend is in dilemma. He is saying that people have kids to avoid reality of life. I don't agree with it. Actually having children is a learning process as well. Children learn from you and you learn from children. Raising children is not an easy task and it requires a lot of patience and discipline. Children bring back livelihood and joy in adult life. You can actually re-live your childhood with them. Like Abhijit had mentioned in other topic that he is learning Math again to teach his kids. He wouldn't have done it if he didn't have kids.
May be your friend wants to live like a young adult for the rest of his life. He reminds me of those people who sit and complain but don't do anything about it. May be he is struggling with his own internal fears. He is afraid of taking his responsibilities and he is worried if he can't take care of himself, how would he take care of other life? Purpose of life can be learn along with children.
HOw old is he? Is he following a religion?

Thats exactly what he said. He said people put their lives on hold for their children because if you're busy breastfeeding or changing diapers u wont question ur existence. Its because ur kids need you and cant survive without u that u can easily forget about ur own existence.

My friend is 25 and he's not following a religion, he used to be religious but he isnt anymore.

Originally posted by: abhijit shukla

Your friend is totally confused. His reproductve system is just as much a part of him as his brain. I do not know of too many single people of my age who know more about life than I do. By your freind's logic, Hitler's life had more meaning than Gandhi's. Tell me it ain't so!

No he doesnt say that people shudnt have children, he just says that they usually have them in order to stop questioning their existence. He believes that u can have children if you have figured out the meaning of ur own existence, but if u haven't people use chlidren to cover that up and find fake meaning in their life. and Gandhi had found his purpose and meaning to his life and his having children was not a form of escapism. hitler had no meaning in his life, kids or no kids. However he feels that for most people children are an escape hatch and a form of evasion tactic.

Originally posted by: mkzara

Thats exactly what he said. He said people put their lives on hold for their children because if you're busy breastfeeding or changing diapers u wont question ur existence. Its because ur kids need you and cant survive without u that u can easily forget about ur own existence.

My friend is 25 and he's not following a religion, he used to be religious but he isnt anymore.

You took my sentence in to a different direction. What I meant was that it's a learning process. Patience and discipline are the qualities you might gain through this learning process. Yes they demand a lot of care and I applaud parents who take time out of their lives to raise children.

Who says parents put their lives on hold? Yes you can say you make adjustment, like taking time off work and changing you schedule, but it's part of life. Ofcourse kids need adults...same way I needed my parents when I was young. I think if you ask people who have kids...they can't imagine their lives without their kids now.

Again, your friend is going through this phase. Hopefuly he resolves his issues before he gets married.

Did your friend go through normal childhood? I apologize if I offend you, but I am just trying to figure him out. He has both parents right? HIs parents get along well?

ummm...i want to be a ob-gyn. i always thought that i wanted kids, but i m not sure. i mean seriously, there is nothing wrong with not having kids. i guess i agree with ur friend, cuz id rather work for WHO and help other people. thats just my take

All i can say is my child taught me how to share my intangible assents, before that I was too selfish for my self, my child taught me to be patient and not to drive my temper on small small petty things, my child taught me the bigger picture of life- what is important and what is not, my child taught me that how someone can trust with full heart, my child taught me that when she hold my hand she transfers all responsibility of her life in my hands and i am her driver and i should be the one to make sure she is riding safe no matter if I am scared, she made me realze how much others in my life when i was little would have worked and pampered me just so i can smile and be happy, she taught me to be thankful for those people and my parents who had gone through same stress when i was growing in this world, she taught me how to love someone without any expectation, she taught me to love this bird and give her wings to just let it go and fly one day..... all I am saying is including kids in your life does not stop you from growing or from knowing purpose of the life...it teaches you important lessons of life and study your life more closely....i had wonderful childhood with so much love and i want to pass the same love to new generation so this world is always full of love through them.