Pathetic Portrayal of Dev - Page 2

There is a big difference Blokes, every single time she pleads Dev to go back......this to me is like requesting.........But this time she "asks" him something........and that too for herself...........all the time, she "requests" Dev for her family, Vish and his family..........

Originally posted by: blokes

I agree to a point with u ks- especially today when rads tells dev that she has NEVER asked him ANYTHING and this will be the first and last thing she asks him I was like- hello woman- u have DEMANDED from this man not once, not twice but hazaar baar about returning to his wife- rut lagaa ke kehti thi vishaka ko maaf karo, vaapas liao, voh naadaan hai.

Dah! Dev should have set the record straight and told her- woman, this is not the first time u have asked me but it better be the LAST!

Originally posted by: anukapoor

There is a big difference Blokes, every single time she pleads Dev to go back......this to me is like requesting.........But this time she "asks" him something........and that too for herself...........all the time, she "requests" Dev for her family, Vish and his family..........

But first time, she wants something for herself......and she is "asking" him to come along for her sake..........Pehli baar ho maang rahi hain radha rani.....

I think viewers tend to forget the details over time. All this anger towards Rads is an example. Ya she has been unfair to Dev.

Dev DID stay married to Vish not just for Rads but for the entire family and to keep their honor in society. So far as no one on the outside, not even hsi family members knew Vishakha's truth, it was in Dev's ability to tolerate her as his wife.

Rads keep pushing Dev that way, because like any normal man Dev found it hard to accept Vish as wife..but it also cannot be denyed that Dev gave Vish nothing in the marriage. Dev never was the ideal husband to her and he can never be. He has not given his 100% to save his marriage. He only tried half heartedly every time. Its another story that Vish could care less and she too barely ever tried to be a good wife to Dev. But Dev is not perfect either. He can never forget his first love and that is part of the reason it never worked with Vish.. .viewers know the relationship is illegal, immoral, but Dev don't know. So its wrong to say that Dev made him feel any sort of guilt for not being a good husband.. because he wasn't. What Vish needed from anyone was understanding, of her dreams and desires, instead from Dev she got responsibilities and strict ones. NO normal girl would survive as CB in Purohit house.. only a girl like Radhika would do all the chores happily therefore she was made for that role. But its not Vish's fault she is not brought up that way. So the argument that Dev is this all perfect husband to whom Vish should have given her all instead she ran away so Dev should rightly feel angry i feel is wrong.

But ya Vish is selfish and doesn't care for the feelings of others. But honestly i've never seen Dev truly care for Vish's feelings. HOw she feels with all the chores of the house and with constant watch over her at every step. He never asked about it. He never asked her what she likes and dislikes. He asked Radhika about her instead. He has always cared only about Radhika's feelings and thoughts.

So in this case, how can you fault Rads for constantly reminding him that he needs to be a good husband to Vish for her to even feel any desire to stay with him. And Rads needed to do that to keep that marriage from breaking, because of the problems that would follow. Like Shashtriji considering Vishakha dead and closing all doors for her to come back. Shashtriji's heartattack.. could have been fatal. Dadi could have buckled under the shock. And the truth is that even now, people in Delhi don't know that Vish the Rajpurohitain has run away. What Purohits or Dev faced in Vrindavan is nothing compared to what they will face in Delhi when the truth comes out that Dev's wife has run. Dev could be stripped of his Raj Purohit title. Rads who is a practical woman (hasn't got a single romantic bone in her)... will think of these things and push Dev towards Vish.

Rads has not reason to believe that telling him the truth will bring any good to anyone. Dev will hate the lie that she and Amma and Devki have told. He will clearly have not reason to stay with Vish. But the badnaami of Shashtriji would kill him. Shashtriji would never survive the shock of having committed such a sin. And Shashtriji means the world to Rads. She gave up her sevika vow to save his life. Her father definitely means more to her than Dev... and its likely because her father has been her support and care taker, her savior for all her life. Shashtriji, his family, his happiness, and his honor are the highest priority for her. Everytimes he has gone and brought VIshakha back has been to save his honor.. for his sake.

---i have a lot to write.. but don't have time.. so reserving for later.

Wanted to add one more thing that i remember now... about submitting in love. Rads has also submitted to Dev not only Dev doing everything that Rads wants. Rads promised him she'll stay in his sight and to keep that promise she went to extremes like running after a car till her legs gave up and enduring the insults of Mrinu in Purohit house.. and even when the whole house insulted her and was throwing her out, she begged to let her remain just because Dev wanted her around. Where was her self respect. Dev loves this girl who has no thought for herself ever. So obviously there is a part of Dev that is just as selfless. ITs a quality that appeals to Dev. The fact however is only that Dev is selfless when it comes to the people that love him, and Rads is selfless when it comes to the people that she loves.
How difficult must it have been for Rads to stay in Purohit house and watch her love belonging to her sister. To constantly have to push Dev away from herself. It was definitely a struggle because every time Dev has shown his vulnerability to her, the pain has reflected on her face even if she turns around away from Dev so that he won't see it.

Dev has only ever asked Rads of one thing.. that was to remain around him at all times. She tried her best and gave her 100% to fulfil that wish of his. It was finally under impossible situation that she had to leave. Rads has only ever asked Dev to fulfil husbandly duties towards Vish.. to love her.. but she had to ask that same thing of him many times, as a request or in a sterner tone, becuase Dev has never given his 100% in trying to do what Rads asked of him. So in a way Dev has been adamant has not succumbed to what Rads wants just because he loves her.. or actually he hasn't been able to do what Rads wants because he loves her.

In this way i don't see Dev as a mindless idiot who can't stand firm in his decisions. He never does what his conscience doesn't allow him to do. Whenever Rads has pushed him towards Vish, he himself has realized the necesity of it, because to him he is married to Vish. He has understood why Rads asks this of him and thus he even thinks of trying. There is practical reasoning behind what Rads asks of him.. there is too much at stake.

But Dev asking Rads to always remain with him.. was completely ridiculous demand. He didn't spare a thought for how Rads could remain in his house forever without facing insults for being a leech and having alterior motives. Yet Rads did everything in her power to make that happen. That was her love for him. she couldn't give him anything else he desired because other people's lives were at stake too... but this she could do her best to make happen so she did.

as for comparing Shashtriji's ability to go beyong Devki and Amma's emotional blackmailing and standing firm in what he decided.. he wasn't alwasy that firm was he? If you think back to the time when the show started, he couldn't do much to shut Amma up against Rads. And from the looks of it, he himself agreed that he failed to get Rads the equal treatment that he wanted to give her all throughout her childhood. So early on Shashtriji wasn't as strong as he is now in ignoring the people. He gave in to the demands of society and that is why Rads grew up believing that she didn't deserve anything. Shashtriji's inability to be firm is why Rads was never allowed to enter the inner temple until recently when Dev stepped in to speak for her.

Dev is not incapable of making decisions but he is not strong enough to ignore the effect of his decision on others. He is not experienced enough to know that people will eventually accept his decision and learn to live with it. And in Dev's situation his family is not like Amma. Amma does drama and over the years Shashtriji knows that. Dev's Dadi, Vaishali etc don't do that kind of natak. The effect his decisions will have on them is real and therefore a risk he is not willing to take.

\Now that everyone else has agreed to RaDev marriage, Radhika is for the first time thinking of her own future with Dev. And she is right in thinking that these same people who are now thinking only of Dev's happiness [and its true, not one of them thought of how Rads feels about Dev, whether she is capable of loving her sister's husband? or how she feels about being a second wife, because the people who brought this proposal only know her to be the second wife, even Vaishali didn't think that she is bringing Rads to the place VIsh was in and how Dev treated Vish because he didn't love her.. she didn't once ask Dev about his past love and how he accepted the proposal for Rads).. so no one really cares how Rads feels... and thats what they will do in future if Vish ever returns for whatever reason. They will ignore Rads' feelings and remember only that Vish is the first wife and therefore has all the rights. So her requests to allow her to make sure one last time before she strengthens her heart against vishakha's reentry is genuine. Even tho Shashtriji has killed Vish in his heart to Radhika she is still alive. But to turn her mind away from thinking first for her sister, and to become a person who thinks first of her own relationship with her love and her husband she needs to make this last attempt.

Originally posted by: -JC-

Wanted to add one more thing that i remember now... about submitting in love. Rads has also submitted to Dev not only Dev doing everything that Rads wants. Rads promised him she'll stay in his sight and to keep that promise she went to extremes like running after a car till her legs gave up and enduring the insults of Mrinu in Purohit house.. and even when the whole house insulted her and was throwing her out, she begged to let her remain just because Dev wanted her around. Where was her self respect. Dev loves this girl who has no thought for herself ever. So obviously there is a part of Dev that is just as selfless. ITs a quality that appeals to Dev. The fact however is only that Dev is selfless when it comes to the people that love him, and Rads is selfless when it comes to the people that she loves.
How difficult must it have been for Rads to stay in Purohit house and watch her love belonging to her sister. To constantly have to push Dev away from herself. It was definitely a struggle because every time Dev has shown his vulnerability to her, the pain has reflected on her face even if she turns around away from Dev so that he won't see it.

Dev has only ever asked Rads of one thing.. that was to remain around him at all times. She tried her best and gave her 100% to fulfil that wish of his. It was finally under impossible situation that she had to leave. Rads has only ever asked Dev to fulfil husbandly duties towards Vish.. to love her.. but she had to ask that same thing of him many times, as a request or in a sterner tone, becuase Dev has never given his 100% in trying to do what Rads asked of him. So in a way Dev has been adamant has not succumbed to what Rads wants just because he loves her.. or actually he hasn't been able to do what Rads wants because he loves her.

In this way i don't see Dev as a mindless idiot who can't stand firm in his decisions. He never does what his conscience doesn't allow him to do. Whenever Rads has pushed him towards Vish, he himself has realized the necesity of it, because to him he is married to Vish. He has understood why Rads asks this of him and thus he even thinks of trying. There is practical reasoning behind what Rads asks of him.. there is too much at stake.

But Dev asking Rads to always remain with him.. was completely ridiculous demand. He didn't spare a thought for how Rads could remain in his house forever without facing insults for being a leech and having alterior motives. Yet Rads did everything in her power to make that happen. That was her love for him. she couldn't give him anything else he desired because other people's lives were at stake too... but this she could do her best to make happen so she did.

as for comparing Shashtriji's ability to go beyong Devki and Amma's emotional blackmailing and standing firm in what he decided.. he wasn't alwasy that firm was he? If you think back to the time when the show started, he couldn't do much to shut Amma up against Rads. And from the looks of it, he himself agreed that he failed to get Rads the equal treatment that he wanted to give her all throughout her childhood. So early on Shashtriji wasn't as strong as he is now in ignoring the people. He gave in to the demands of society and that is why Rads grew up believing that she didn't deserve anything. Shashtriji's inability to be firm is why Rads was never allowed to enter the inner temple until recently when Dev stepped in to speak for her.

Dev is not incapable of making decisions but he is not strong enough to ignore the effect of his decision on others. He is not experienced enough to know that people will eventually accept his decision and learn to live with it. And in Dev's situation his family is not like Amma. Amma does drama and over the years Shashtriji knows that. Dev's Dadi, Vaishali etc don't do that kind of natak. The effect his decisions will have on them is real and therefore a risk he is not willing to take.

\Now that everyone else has agreed to RaDev marriage, Radhika is for the first time thinking of her own future with Dev. And she is right in thinking that these same people who are now thinking only of Dev's happiness [and its true, not one of them thought of how Rads feels about Dev, whether she is capable of loving her sister's husband? or how she feels about being a second wife, because the people who brought this proposal only know her to be the second wife, even Vaishali didn't think that she is bringing Rads to the place VIsh was in and how Dev treated Vish because he didn't love her.. she didn't once ask Dev about his past love and how he accepted the proposal for Rads).. so no one really cares how Rads feels... and thats what they will do in future if Vish ever returns for whatever reason. They will ignore Rads' feelings and remember only that Vish is the first wife and therefore has all the rights. So her requests to allow her to make sure one last time before she strengthens her heart against vishakha's reentry is genuine. Even tho Shashtriji has killed Vish in his heart to Radhika she is still alive. But to turn her mind away from thinking first for her sister, and to become a person who thinks first of her own relationship with her love and her husband she needs to make this last attempt.

The problem is that i don't think i am clearly able to share my POV and why I seem to understand the characters, and all of them not just the ones that are "human". I can see where Radhika is coming from because of how her life has been.. same with Vish and same with Dev. They are a product of thier cicumstances and upbringing.. and do what they think is right according to those norms. Rads love is not understood by majority because its not the conventional "human" way of showing love. Its the silent, sacrifical and stone-hearted way of loving. Not everyone is that way.. actually most people are not that way. Its not in her desire to be perfect in the eyes of society that she shuns Dev and refuses to tell the truth. Its in her desire to prevent damage like death of Shashtriji and Dadi and the humiliation the truth will cause the Purohits and the Shashtris. Why is that hard to understand. If to do this she has to make herself immune to Dev's pleadings then so be it.

Just like some of you have a hard time understand how Rads can be so cruel to Dev, i have a hard time understanding how Dev can be so lost in his love that he doesn't see what the consequences are that lay ahead. Like the time he wanted Rads to confess her love and he kept making googlie eyes at Rads all in front of Chacha-Arjun-and Mrinu and even signed off a check without looking in that time. WTH? Where is the responsible Raj Purohit? Or asking Rads to remain in his sight... how selfish? What he doesn't expect Rads to ever have a life because he loves her.. so he will do as she bids and be a husband to her sister but he wants her around to witness it and never leave his house to possibly move on and marry someone else or he is not thinking what the world will think of her as she remains in her sister's house? So Dev is a highly emotional thinker and Rads is the opposite. If you can understand one, you must understand the other too.. because a balanced person would meet these two characters somewhere in the middle. It takes Radhika's counsel for Dev to understand what the future of his demands and behaviors are and it takes Dev's consel for Radhika to understand that she cannot completely ignore what she feels and her feelings are not dead and very much alive within her, ones she cannot bury.

So they need each other to be the way they are to bring a balance in this relationship. They love each other, the way they are. So why can't we love them the way they are and try and understand why they are the way they are.

Originally posted by: koolsadhu1000

Rainabow , about the closure aspect ........I am telling u , there is gonna be no closure to the Vishakha angle in Radhikas life .................forever ! Closure is not an Indian value according to these Hindi serials . When Vishakas film career flops and she returns , Radhika will agree to step back and allow Vishakha to take her place once more . Whats more , the stubborn goat will actually manage to convince Dev to go along with this too , and hide from him that there was no marraige between him and Vishakha at all ........ever . She will lie and tell him mine is a second marraige with u , ur still legally wedeed to Vishakha homour it plzzzzzzz.............if u love me u will accept this !

Totally agree with u about the slap part .........she desrves a resounding , tight slap . Why ? Coz she constantly laid guilt trips on him for not giving his best in a marraige that didnt even exist in the first place ! Gosh how i wud love that scene !

Well, I do not think she will actually GET the closure she seeks. I wrote another post that is floating around in cyberspace somewhere about how she will never get any sense of closure until the truth is out about how she has always been Dev's wife. No one really agreed, which didn't surprise me, but this s what I think. Even if Mrinali (and friends) continue to harass her and break her and Dev apart, they shouldn't be able to do it on the grounds that she is an illegitimate wife. She is going to continue receiving second grade treatment as long as she is seen as a second wife.

However, I can understand why she would feel better after confronting Vish. She needs a defense for later, if Vish comes back. This way at least she can say she did everything she could to get Vishaka back. I don't expect her to use this defense, but at least it is there for her.