Pathetic Portrayal of Dev - Page 3

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Dabulls23 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#21

Originally posted by: Tashu_US

This might be lil off topic but Why does Radhika keep asking Dev to be with VIsh ? I mean VISH is not even married to Dev...Isnt it some sort of 'paap' to make Vish stay with Dev ( at least from Radhika's side since she knows that Vish is not married to Dev) ??!? She couldnt tell everyone the truth for lots of reason and i dont want to get into that now BUT when she is getting a chance to make things right...why is she not taking it ?

That is one 68 Million $ question we all have my dear....
Amma, Devki, Radhika are comitting a bigger sin by hiding, lying and forcing 2 unmarried people as married....Go figure.....
Poor Purohit family & Shashtri ji are in dark....If I were Dev I would never take either of these 2 shashtri sisters back into my life....Time to move on and find some one who might be more honest....
rainabow thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#22

Originally posted by: Tashu_US

This might be lil off topic but Why does Radhika keep asking Dev to be with VIsh ? I mean VISH is not even married to Dev...Isnt it some sort of 'paap' to make Vish stay with Dev ( at least from Radhika's side since she knows that Vish is not married to Dev) ??!? She couldnt tell everyone the truth for lots of reason and i dont want to get into that now BUT when she is getting a chance to make things right...why is she not taking it ?



This is the most fundamental question that I don't think any of us has the answer too. Radhika can't decide whether Dev is her husband or Vishaka's. This is why she comes off as being such a phony "devotee" of Kanha. There can only be two options:

-As an ardent devotee of Kanha, she believes the marriage rituals and vows she took with Dev are sacred and bind them together as husband and wife. She will fulfill all her duties as wife and CB.

-She was just a placeholder (a stone, as Amma said) for Vishaka. Vishaka is Dev's wife and Radhika has no rights over him. She will not perform any vrats or poojas for his sake. She will not refer to him as her pati. She will simply move on in life, and this includes getting remarried.

Right now she is trying to do both at once, which makes no sense. On one hand she performs all these vrats and poojas, wears sindoor, and refuses to remarry. On the other hand, she argues with Kanha himself that he is "wrong" and Dev and Vishaka belong together. She is so stubborn that she simply cannot accept that her contradictory actions are not sustainable. Eventually she will have to come to a decision: Is she or is she not Dev's wife? It seems she will finally come to that decision in a matter of days.
Tashu_US thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#23
Thanks for replying guys !
Amma, Devki and Rakhika were trying to marry Vish and Dev few months before...If they would have gotten married, then whatever Radhika is doing right now make some sense....but at this point., Its annoying as hell.
Dabulls23 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#24

Originally posted by: Tashu_US

Thanks for replying guys !

Amma, Devki and Rakhika were trying to marry Vish and Dev few months before...If they would have gotten married, then whatever Radhika is doing right now make some sense....but at this point., Its annoying as hell.

How can Amma, Devki & Radhika marry Dev & Vish few months ago???? He is married to Radhika and w/o divorce to Radhika his marriage to Vishakha is null & void...She would be his mistress IMHO....This story line is By doing a pooja to undo a wedding is also Don't this people know marriage is a legal fact not just something which can be done & undone in mandir.....😳
razor12 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#25

Originally posted by: -JC-

I have various problems with your desire to see Dev the way you explained. Unfortunately don't have time to write a huge reply.

In my eyes loving someone means submitting to them willingly. Its a very hard thing to do, but if you really really love them, and its a relationship blessed by God, then you'll find yourself submitting to the other person. Its the same for guy or girl. Radhika may appear emotionless and stone hearted but if you guys have ever noticed that when Dev becomes stubborn and tells her that he'll have no other way but if she accepts what he says, she succumbs to it. But Dev loves her enough not to put her in that tight spot all the time. He knew she loves him because she not able to refuse him. But will he force his decision upon her? IS that love? What manliness will he claim if he tells Radhika "I don't care about anything you feel or want, i want you in my life so marry me."
Radhika pleads with him, and its not easy to convince him to go and ask Vishakha again.. but Radhika explains clearly why she needs to do it and that she won't have any peace until she tries one last time.

As for Dev being a doormat.

Correct me if i am wrong but since Purohits and Shashtris are highly religious group of people, they wake sleep and dine in the sacred texts of these religion... i beleive a marriage is for keepsake no matter what kind of life partner you recieve according to the traditions. There is no option of divorce, tho now a days its afforded by law. But traditionally speaking, two people joined in marriage are together till death no matter what they are like.
For a Raj Purohit it becomes even more important to be an example of what an ideal Hindu man and family is to be in front of the people. So Dev cannot just ditch his wife because they are not each other's soulmates. Until Dev knows the truth that he married Radhika and not Vish he cannot act purposely to push Vish away from his life.

He went back to Vish the first time not simply because Rads asked him to but because he needed to save his family honor and didn't want to give such a huge shock to his ill Dadi. He didn't want to be riduculed by all like the way he was during the mutt puja because his wife ran away. The only option for him at that time was to go and find Vish and try to bring her back. Sometimes you know you have to do something you really don't want to do but its in the best interest of everyone, and just because someone else comes along and point it out to you that "hey this is what you should do" you don't change your decision about doing it.. and that decision doesn't become someone else's.

This time he is giving Rads the chance that he asked for. She asked him to go along with her, because she can't go alone. I am sure if she was capable of going alone she'd have. But Dev knows where Vish is and Rads can't travel alone to a city like Mumbai, especially after what happened with that producer guy. Plus if she tried to go without Dev, she'd have to tell Shashtriji where she is going and he wouldn't let her go. Dev is going to support Rads, not to bring Vish back. He has already accepted that Vish will not return to his life. And even if she does she'll have no place in his heart ever. But Rads also needs to make that judgement for herself before she takes the big decision of claiming right over what is already hers. Because this time once she has accepted the post as Dev's wife, no one should be able to come back and depost her.

Jc - Good explanation but I disagree wtih you and agree with KS on one point. If Vish says she would like to come back into Dev's life (for any good reason of hers), Radhika can't inflict Dev to accept her. Dev must have atleast made this point clear to Rads. Whether or not Rads accepts Dev's proposal, she can't tell Dev to accept Vish into his life again as she is his wife etc...(BS).
This is where I would like Dev to stand up for himself (yes, a Raj Purohit can't go against hindu religion rules and rituals) but it is not written any where that a RP should accept the woman even after breaking their marriage and clearly told him that she is not interested in living with him (more than once).
Julie0001 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#26
JC that is such an interesting reading. I have never read this type of analysis of Dev and it does make me think of him as imperfect but still lovely. Your reading of Radhika is equally beautiful. Indeed, the :"inhuman" is still part of the human in people. Really you have blown me away with this analysis. I am enjoying this debate. Everyone is writing so forcefully, clearly and rationally. Thank you


JC writes:just like some of you have a hard time understand how Rads can be so cruel to Dev, i have a hard time understanding how Dev can be so lost in his love that he doesn't see what the consequences are that lay ahead. Like the time he wanted Rads to confess her love and he kept making googlie eyes at Rads all in front of Chacha-Arjun-and Mrinu and even signed off a check without looking in that time. WTH? Where is the responsible Raj Purohit? Or asking Rads to remain in his sight... how selfish? What he doesn't expect Rads to ever have a life because he loves her.. so he will do as she bids and be a husband to her sister but he wants her around to witness it and never leave his house to possibly move on and marry someone else or he is not thinking what the world will think of her as she remains in her sister's house? So Dev is a highly emotional thinker and Rads is the opposite. If you can understand one, you must understand the other too.. because a balanced person would meet these two characters somewhere in the middle. It takes Radhika's counsel for Dev to understand what the future of his demands and behaviors are and it takes Dev's consel for Radhika to understand that she cannot completely ignore what she feels and her feelings are not dead and very much alive within her, ones she cannot bury.
my_view thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#27
I agree with with what Koolsadhu said brilliantly.
Dev should have prerogative to refuse to accept Vishaka back after all is said and done by Vish regardless of whether she wants to come back or not. Which makes this trip to Mumbai hokey pokey BS unless Dev is looking to spend some quality time enroute to mumbai with Radhika 😛..
I think if Dev's wedding were fixed with some other random girl at this juncture, Radhika would still have a problem and do everything in her power to stop Dev's 2nd wedding.
I wish for once Dev had guts to confront Radhika about why she picks Vish over him. Doen't she want Dev to be happy as much as she wants Vish's happiness? Why the hypocrisy?
There is a fine line between love and obsession..Dev and Radhika have crossed that line and sadly in Rads case the obsession is Vish and not Dev..
Granted Rads has lived all her life being a doormat but Dev was shown as a much stronger character able to live his life with logic and convicton..
Sadly now it is difficult to tell who is a bigger doormat..
Tashu_US thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#28

Originally posted by: Dabulls23

How can Amma, Devki & Radhika marry Dev & Vish few months ago???? He is married to Radhika and w/o divorce to Radhika his marriage to Vishakha is null & void...She would be his mistress IMHO....This story line is By doing a pooja to undo a wedding is also Don't this people know marriage is a legal fact not just something which can be done & undone in mandir.....😳

I knowwww ! but they still tried doing that.... so I am guessing that ceremony hold some importance to Amma, Devki and Radhika... and if they would have successfully done that then whatever Radhika is doing right now would make some sense ( cuz in their mind Dev and Vish would be married, even tho we know that marriage was not legal )
More than anything ( including Ammas nonsense ) the person who gets on my nerves is Radhika...I simply dont get her...
Edited by Tashu_US - 16 years ago
koolsadhu1000 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#29

Originally posted by: -JC-

Wanted to add one more thing that i remember now... about submitting in love. Rads has also submitted to Dev not only Dev doing everything that Rads wants. Rads promised him she'll stay in his sight and to keep that promise she went to extremes like running after a car till her legs gave up and enduring the insults of Mrinu in Purohit house.. and even when the whole house insulted her and was throwing her out, she begged to let her remain just because Dev wanted her around. Where was her self respect. Dev loves this girl who has no thought for herself ever. So obviously there is a part of Dev that is just as selfless. ITs a quality that appeals to Dev. The fact however is only that Dev is selfless when it comes to the people that love him, and Rads is selfless when it comes to the people that she loves.
How difficult must it have been for Rads to stay in Purohit house and watch her love belonging to her sister. To constantly have to push Dev away from herself. It was definitely a struggle because every time Dev has shown his vulnerability to her, the pain has reflected on her face even if she turns around away from Dev so that he won't see it. What you call as a submitting of love on Radhika's part can also be construed by many as a guilt conscience .......guilt , for knowing in her heart that he is not even married to Vishakha ! Guilt that she , Radhika , was his real wife . What you see as submission to his wishes was actually an attempt on her part to have the cake and eat it too ............just as Rainabow has explained clearly in her post . Having the cake was keeping Vishakha as her priority intact and eating the cake was living near him as her religious beliefs pricked her conscience that actualy she was his ife , the seven rounds were done with her , and only and only she knew it . Otherwise which other wishes did this character submit to ? He asked her to come and see her father in the Hospital .........NO. He asked her to leave the ashram .........NOpe . He wanted to leave Vishakha after it was found she was hobnobbing with strange men , still the answer was NOPE . So this submission that u speak of..........look at it very carefully . Was it really such a struggle for her to watch Dev living with another woman , her own sister , hmmmm, I may sound callous , but I honestly don't think so coz Radhika is the Eternally suffering Madonna type who r unfortunately happy only when they r in pain simultaneously . U Urself described her in another post of urs in this same thread ........that she is indeed the stone hearted , unemotional type loving kind . Though i had a problem as i found the statement highly paradoxical , I understood what u were saying . Girls like Radhika smile with tears brimming in their eyes , and this , my dear , is the blunt truth . They need pain to survive .

Dev has only ever asked Rads of one thing.. that was to remain around him at all times. She tried her best and gave her 100% to fulfil that wish of his. It was finally under impossible situation that she had to leave. Rads has only ever asked Dev to fulfil husbandly duties towards Vish.. to love her.. but she had to ask that same thing of him many times, as a request or in a sterner tone, becuase Dev has never given his 100% in trying to do what Rads asked of him. So in a way Dev has been adamant has not succumbed to what Rads wants just because he loves her.. or actually he hasn't been able to do what Rads wants because he loves her. Yup and that makes him human , realistic and endearing . If he had tried to work the marraige with Vish as viewers we may have hated him . Refreshing character , really . Just needs to stand up more to that girl who pretends to be moralistic and actually violates religious vows by encoraging a marraige that didnt take place at all .

In this way i don't see Dev as a mindless idiot who can't stand firm in his decisions. He never does what his conscience doesn't allow him to do. Whenever Rads has pushed him towards Vish, he himself has realized the necesity of it, because to him he is married to Vish. He has understood why Rads asks this of him and thus he even thinks of trying. There is practical reasoning behind what Rads asks of him.. there is too much at stake.

But Dev asking Rads to always remain with him.. was completely ridiculous demand. He didn't spare a thought for how Rads could remain in his house forever without facing insults for being a leech and having alterior motives. Yet Rads did everything in her power to make that happen. That was her love for him. she couldn't give him anything else he desired because other people's lives were at stake too... but this she could do her best to make happen so she did. Mindless toh he is . Mindwallah toh hai only Shastriji . Dev had decided to leave Vishakha . Radhika made him change his mind . If Wife is meeting strange men behind his back and he decides to leeave her and then changes hurriedly again coz Radhika convinced him ............a chit of a girl who really has no exprience of life whatsoever , the man needs to take serious lessons from his sasur who remains firm on his decisions while the idiotic female trio in his family rave , rant and burst in flood of tears ...............Amma , Devki , and Radhika . Firm as a rock he is , dramatic and unethical as the Tarpan was . Hats off to him coz these 3 ladies r no less .

as for comparing Shashtriji's ability to go beyong Devki and Amma's emotional blackmailing and standing firm in what he decided.. he wasn't alwasy that firm was he? If you think back to the time when the show started, he couldn't do much to shut Amma up against Rads. And from the looks of it, he himself agreed that he failed to get Rads the equal treatment that he wanted to give her all throughout her childhood. So early on Shashtriji wasn't as strong as he is now in ignoring the people. He gave in to the demands of society and that is why Rads grew up believing that she didn't deserve anything. Shashtriji's inability to be firm is why Rads was never allowed to enter the inner temple until recently when Dev stepped in to speak for her.

Dev is not incapable of making decisions but he is not strong enough to ignore the effect of his decision on others. He is not experienced enough to know that people will eventually accept his decision and learn to live with it. And in Dev's situation his family is not like Amma. Amma does drama and over the years Shashtriji knows that. Dev's Dadi, Vaishali etc don't do that kind of natak. The effect his decisions will have on them is real and therefore a risk he is not willing to take.

\Now that everyone else has agreed to RaDev marriage, Radhika is for the first time thinking of her own future with Dev. And she is right in thinking that these same people who are now thinking only of Dev's happiness [and its true, not one of them thought of how Rads feels about Dev, whether she is capable of loving her sister's husband? or how she feels about being a second wife, because the people who brought this proposal only know her to be the second wife, even Vaishali didn't think that she is bringing Rads to the place VIsh was in and how Dev treated Vish because he didn't love her.. she didn't once ask Dev about his past love and how he accepted the proposal for Rads).. so no one really cares how Rads feels... and thats what they will do in future if Vish ever returns for whatever reason. They will ignore Rads' feelings and remember only that Vish is the first wife and therefore has all the rights. So her requests to allow her to make sure one last time before she strengthens her heart against vishakha's reentry is genuine. Even tho Shashtriji has killed Vish in his heart to Radhika she is still alive. But to turn her mind away from thinking first for her sister, and to become a person who thinks first of her own relationship with her love and her husband she needs to make this last attempt. The rest of ur analysis I have no problems with .. Like I told u , my points r entirely diffrent .😊

koolsadhu1000 thumbnail
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Posted: 16 years ago
#30

Originally posted by: my_view

I agree with with what Koolsadhu said brilliantly.

Dev should have prerogative to refuse to accept Vishaka back after all is said and done by Vish regardless of whether she wants to come back or not. Which makes this trip to Mumbai hokey pokey BS unless Dev is looking to spend some quality time enroute to mumbai with Radhika 😛..
I think if Dev's wedding were fixed with some other random girl at this juncture, Radhika would still have a problem and do everything in her power to stop Dev's 2nd wedding.
I wish for once Dev had guts to confront Radhika about why she picks Vish over him. Doen't she want Dev to be happy as much as she wants Vish's happiness? Why the hypocrisy?
There is a fine line between love and obsession..Dev and Radhika have crossed that line and sadly in Rads case the obsession is Vish and not Dev..
Granted Rads has lived all her life being a doormat but Dev was shown as a much stronger character able to live his life with logic and convicton..
Sadly now it is difficult to tell who is a bigger doormat..

Kudos to u for putting it so aptly . The million dollar question remains buried ............If Dev s family had fixed his marraige with another girl , This same Rads wud have run after him , convincing him to still consider vISHAKHA . As u so aptly put ...........Dev's obsession is Radhika and hers ...........Vishakha .

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