Originally posted by: --Pro.vo.King--
It is not illogical to assume that fantasy series like Twilight or even problematic Indian daily soaps with its cray cray female fan following is a reflection ( though far fetched ) real life expectations .. Art imitates life & vice versa.
Downright denying it or making absurd claims of it being "illogical" is no way to acknowledge "the problem" .. As long as you keep doing that , you are never going to see any real change .. Its like ostrich ducking its head into sand .. LOL
There is a certain truth to art imitates life and life imitates art. People crave relateable characters because we want to see art imitate our reality. Some social behaviors like stalking or persistent courtship are indeed a paradoxical circle between life and art.
But here is why assuming fandom and popularity to be a reflection of reality is illogical and dangerous.
Art was never meant to be a mirror image of reality. Art has never been a mirror image of reality. Art caters to the human desire for fantasy and escapism. Some fantasy is grounded in genuine human desire - a reflection of people's daydreams to be rich and famous. However, a large chunk of fantasy is built on subconscious or dark desires.
Entire genres of art are built on escapist fantasies that no one actually wants in reality. Video games are one such genre. There are many gory violent video games. It lets a human act out a fantasy of violence. Many who play such games are pacificists in real life. Some people use it as a channel to release pent-up anger they may have towards situations in life
P0rnography is another such genre. People of all gender identities and sexual orientations watch p0rnographic material that they would never ever want to indulge in real life.
So no matter what form of art you see, there is a certain element of it that is unreal, undesirable and pure fantasy.
It is illogical and dangerous to assume it reflects what people really want. A woman who watches a rape fantasy p0rn does not want to be raped. A teenager who goes on a crime spree in Grand Theft auto does not want to go on a real crime spree.
Edward Cullen of Twilight is a vampire. He is the embodiment of vampire mythos that has made vampires as alluring, sexual, and enigmatic beings. To assume that any man can do to their crush what Edward does to Bella is illogical and dangerous.
Similarly, Fifty Shades of Grey is an escapist sexual fantasy. A large number of its readers and fans are people who engage in traditional vanilla sex, satisfied with vanilla sex and would never ever want anything risque in reality. It just offers people a fantasy of forbidden fruit that they would never ever indulge in real life. To assume that all women want a controlling dom partner would be illogical and dangerous.
Especially when a large chunk of BDSM fantasy is based on reverse gender roles. Dominatrix is an inherently female word, and there is no male equivalent yet.
Which brings to the other important point that you cannot generalize. A reflection of reality for some can never be a reflection of reality for all.
I will admit that there are genuinely some women out there who are turned on and attracted to controlling men. There are women who are actually masochistic and want their partners to be sexually violent.
No matter how popular a show gets, there will always be people just not into it. No matter how much a show or character is relatable, there will be people who just cannot connect with it. Let us also not forget that despite the massive popularity of Twilight and 50 Shades, they also had a huge backlash as well. People criticized the books for unhealthy portrayal. Evidence that at least some portion of the population was disturbed and turned off by the depiction in the books.
Imagine the trauma a simple woman who was disturbed by these books would go through when a man assumes all women are into such things and emulates it. It can result in long-lasting PTSD. That is why it is illogical and dangerous to assume fantasy is a reality.
I'm acknowledging the widespread problem. People assuming movies reflect reality. People assuming that popularity of 50 shades means all women are secretly into BDSM. That is why I am calling it illogical and dangerous.
Please do not assume anything. Consent is key. Ask what the person really wants and enjoys.
And respect and dignity as a human being is universal. Even if a person is a masochist they want a partner who will respect the safe word and would never do anything that would threaten or violate them. Even if a person likes people who are rough on the edges they do want someone who knows the lines of decency and wouldn't cross into disrespect or abuse of any kind.
Indian Idol 15
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