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hisusmita

@hisusmita

Sparkler

Posted: 10 years ago

#31

Originally posted by: Chahanya

Pati patni aur misunderstandings

Pati patni aur lack of trust

Pati patni aur insecurities

Pati patni aur unki khud ki khadi ki gayi problems

Pati patni aur koi nahi hai teesra

It is only Pati patni

rightly said chahat.

Woh comes only when these things , lack of trust, insecurities, khud ki kadi ki gayi prob, are already there between pati and patni otherwise there is no space for Woh between pati and patni

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hisusmita

@hisusmita

Sparkler

Posted: 10 years ago

#32

This is a daily soap. They will not show Anandi saying everyday I dont want to stay in BH.

They showed us one scene that she dont want to stay there and was forced to live. We have to assume she is forced to live .

They showed us one day J is comparing A and G that means it is there.

They wanted Anandi has not sensed the problem between Pati patni as they are fighting inside the bedroom , we have to accept that.

First time they showed us she sensed that. So we have to understand she sensed that now.

Lets see what happens next.

She has every right in BH but she is staying their unwillingly.

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Chahat Doshi

@Chahat_A_Doshi

Trailblazer

+ 7

Posted: 10 years ago

#33

Originally posted by: hisusmita

rightly said chahat.

Woh comes only when these things , lack of trust, insecurities, khud ki kadi ki gayi prob, are already there between pati and patni otherwise there is no space for Woh between pati and patni

BH Pati patni ke beech millions of woh can come but Never will Anandi be that woh So peeps who refer to her in that way should stop

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RTee

@RTee

Sparkler

Posted: 10 years ago

#34

Events of 11 years ago...

Anandi was with an infant of 3-4 months. Her daughter had been abducted. Her husband had died 6-7 months earlier. Her in-laws decided to shift lock stock and barrel to far away lands.

Anandi refuses to go. Everyone understands. They do not persuade her too hard. But Daddu is not comfortable leaving her without any support in the above situation.

The elder of KB family and elder of BH family decide that she must shift to Jaitser. Daddu and Dadisa announce their decision. She protests. She resists. Daddu orders. She reluctantly relents.

She physically shifts to BH. But in her heart of hearts she is uncomfortable. We the audience are more uncomfortable. She expresses her desire to move out. She pleads with DadiSa, who gets very upset and tells her in no uncertain terms that if she wants to live alone she need never have come to Jaitser. She puts her case in front of Jagya and tells him the real reasons. Nothing hidden. He does not find it a problem. But does discuss it with his wife. Who is even more astonished that Anandi could harbour such thoughts. She tells her husband that she has no problem with Anandi living under the same roof as she is well aware of their past, present...

So Anandi shifts in, physicall and mentally, but still reluctantly. She lives here but does not make it her home.

Armed with an infant, searching for another infant, she tries to carve out a life for herself, where she can be free to be herself and live with her husband's memories.

Other side, Ganga takes up studies to be a doctor. It is totally time consuming. No time to bother about petty politics.

She is probably happy to have Anandi around who can look after her kids, the house while she spends time studying. After all Abhi was just a year or so old when Anandi moved in. Imagine DadiSa looking after the house, 2 kids, business, while Jagya is busy with 2 professions and Ganga is studying to be a doctor.

At that time it was a win-win situation.

Everyone is busy. In fact more than busy. Kids are growing up but still very young.

Around 6 years easily pass by in this process.

By now life at BH has settled into a routine. Anandi is helping out in the house. All kids are comfortable with her.

Now Ganga is back full-time after becoming a doctor. Her mind is free to think about her house, kids and husband in addition to the hospital.

Ganga takes back the reins of the house. But it can never be the same. She allowed the reins to slip, and to get them back completely is a difficult or even impossible task.

She is now a professional and probably no longer happy with Anandi's influence on the house, husband, her kids. In frustration at comparisons, she throws that bomb shell on Jagya.

Their relationship gets strained. But life continues.

Younger kids are now 11-12 They are developing a personality, opinion, outlook of their own.

They need their space.

Problems happen in all joint families. Between brothers, kids, wives. Comparisons, competition, jealousies. They survive as long as it is possible to live together. They fight. People move out.

It is now time for Anandi too to move out. Let them solve their problems by themselves. If she/her presence is even remotely the reason, let that reason no longer exist.

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jayshree1942

@jayshree1942

Voyager

Posted: 10 years ago

#35

Anandi staying in badi haveli is not a problem for ganga.

her problem is anandi is treated as adviser to jagya .

I remember when new gauri was staying in badi haveli she also says how can anandi still dominates jagya.

basically anandi approach should be jagya u solve u r problem with u r wife.

for eg. if ganga tells jagya why u scolded me in front of others, jagya will say i was not scolding u, i was just telling u, u r taking in wrong way.

but after this if anandi will tell jagya that u did mistake of scolding ganga in public u should have not done this, and after this jagya will go to ganga for saying sorry.

so ganga will feel meine bhi same baat boli but jab anandi ne boli toh jagya ne accept kiya.

that is the problem of ganga jagya

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 10 years ago

#36

Originally posted by: RTee
Events of 11 years ago...

Anandi was with an infant of 3-4 months. Her daughter had been abducted. Her husband had died 6-7 months earlier. Her in-laws decided to shift lock stock and barrel to far away lands.

Anandi refuses to go. Everyone understands. They do not persuade her too hard. But Daddu is not comfortable leaving her without any support in the above situation.

The elder of KB family and elder of BH family decide that she must shift to Jaitser. Daddu and Dadisa announce their decision. She protests. She resists. Daddu orders. She reluctantly relents.

She physically shifts to BH. But in her heart of hearts she is uncomfortable. We the audience are more uncomfortable. She expresses her desire to move out. She pleads with DadiSa, who gets very upset and tells her in no uncertain terms that if she wants to live alone she need never have come to Jaitser. She puts her case in front of Jagya and tells him the real reasons. Nothing hidden. He does not find it a problem. But does discuss it with his wife. Who is even more astonished that Anandi could harbour such thoughts. She tells her husband that she has no problem with Anandi living under the same roof as she is well aware of their past, present...

So Anandi shifts in, physicall and mentally, but still reluctantly. She lives here but does not make it her home.

Armed with an infant, searching for another infant, she tries to carve out a life for herself, where she can be free to be herself and live with her husband's memories.

Other side, Ganga takes up studies to be a doctor. It is totally time consuming. No time to bother about petty politics.

She is probably happy to have Anandi around who can look after her kids, the house while she spends time studying. After all Abhi was just a year or so old when Anandi moved in. Imagine DadiSa looking after the house, 2 kids, business, while Jagya is busy with 2 professions and Ganga is studying to be a doctor.

At that time it was a win-win situation.

Everyone is busy. In fact more than busy. Kids are growing up but still very young.

Around 6 years easily pass by in this process.

By now life at BH has settled into a routine. Anandi is helping out in the house. All kids are comfortable with her.

Now Ganga is back full-time after becoming a doctor. Her mind is free to think about her house, kids and husband in addition to the hospital.

Ganga takes back the reins of the house. But it can never be the same. She allowed the reins to slip, and to get them back completely is a difficult or even impossible task.

She is now a professional and probably no longer happy with Anandi's influence on the house, husband, her kids. In frustration at comparisons, she throws that bomb shell on Jagya.

Their relationship gets strained. But life continues.

Younger kids are now 11-12 They are developing a personality, opinion, outlook of their own.

They need their space.

Problems happen in all joint families. Between brothers, kids, wives. Comparisons, competition, jealousies. They survive as long as it is possible to live together. They fight. People move out.

It is now time for Anandi too to move out. Let them solve their problems by themselves. If she/her presence is even remotely the reason, let that reason no longer exist.

Exactly.This is what I was trying to say. Both Anandi and Ganga had been doing a lot of things over the past 11 years. While Anandi had a family to look upto Ganga had someone to help her looks after kids and help take care of the home.It was a mutually beneficial relationship while they were busy building their own lives.

In all these years Ganga kind of lost grip on some aspects of her life and to that when this constant comparisons are added and that made things worse for her.

Samething with Anandi too.She was pressurised to stay at a place where shewas not comfortable and now she needs a place where she and her son can be just themselves instead of having a feeling of walking on egg shells all the time.

These things didn't come up overnight but they were building up over years and why did they let them reach this stage ? Simply because for both women there were lot of things that needed their immediate attentions namely children adn careers.

Edited by aparnauma - 10 years ago

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hisusmita

@hisusmita

Sparkler

Posted: 10 years ago

#37

How Ganga studied MBBS?

Jaitsar didnt have any medical college.

She had to stay outside Jaitsar.

Who took care of her two kids that time.?

Many things are not clear.

They show it very easily but things are not tht easy in practical.

May be that is the reason distance created between them

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aparnauma

@GoodDoc_2105

Trailblazer

+ 4

Posted: 10 years ago

#38

Originally posted by: hisusmita
How Ganga studied MBBS?
Jaitsar didnt have any medical college.

She had to stay outside Jaitsar.

Who took care of her two kids that time.?

Many things are not clear.

They show it very easily but things are not tht easy in practical.

May be that is the reason distance created between them

She went away to some other place to do her Medicine and her specialisation.

At that tme both her kids were very small.So it was quite helpful to have Anandi around to take care of kids and home.

That's why she didn't open her mouth about not like comparisons or wouldn't haev minded if her husband gave more weightage to Anandi's words

Now she is back and she is finding it difficult to handle her kids and her husband's comparisons were not helping thing either.

Anandi also probably been glad to have something to keep her occupied in addition to building up Shiv Niketan and taking care of Shivam adn searching for Nandini.

So it's not like Ganga did a great sacrifice by agreeing to have Anandi at he home.

She knew that she could trust Anandi with her kids and home because she won't take them away from her.

Anandi did not do anything to take them away from her but they just slipped away from her because of her own way of handling things.

So in many ways it is better for Anandi to move away because that way Ganga will realise that Shivam is not the root cause of Abhi's problems nor Anandi is the cause of her problems

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Vidya

@Shinya

Rocker

Posted: 10 years ago

#39

Originally posted by: RTee
Events of 11 years ago...

Anandi was with an infant of 3-4 months. Her daughter had been abducted. Her husband had died 6-7 months earlier. Her in-laws decided to shift lock stock and barrel to far away lands.

Anandi refuses to go. Everyone understands. They do not persuade her too hard. But Daddu is not comfortable leaving her without any support in the above situation.

The elder of KB family and elder of BH family decide that she must shift to Jaitser. Daddu and Dadisa announce their decision. She protests. She resists. Daddu orders. She reluctantly relents.

She physically shifts to BH. But in her heart of hearts she is uncomfortable. We the audience are more uncomfortable. She expresses her desire to move out. She pleads with DadiSa, who gets very upset and tells her in no uncertain terms that if she wants to live alone she need never have come to Jaitser. She puts her case in front of Jagya and tells him the real reasons. Nothing hidden. He does not find it a problem. But does discuss it with his wife. Who is even more astonished that Anandi could harbour such thoughts. She tells her husband that she has no problem with Anandi living under the same roof as she is well aware of their past, present...

So Anandi shifts in, physicall and mentally, but still reluctantly. She lives here but does not make it her home.

Armed with an infant, searching for another infant, she tries to carve out a life for herself, where she can be free to be herself and live with her husband's memories.

Other side, Ganga takes up studies to be a doctor. It is totally time consuming. No time to bother about petty politics.

She is probably happy to have Anandi around who can look after her kids, the house while she spends time studying. After all Abhi was just a year or so old when Anandi moved in. Imagine DadiSa looking after the house, 2 kids, business, while Jagya is busy with 2 professions and Ganga is studying to be a doctor.

At that time it was a win-win situation.

Everyone is busy. In fact more than busy. Kids are growing up but still very young.

Around 6 years easily pass by in this process.

By now life at BH has settled into a routine. Anandi is helping out in the house. All kids are comfortable with her.

Now Ganga is back full-time after becoming a doctor. Her mind is free to think about her house, kids and husband in addition to the hospital.

Ganga takes back the reins of the house. But it can never be the same. She allowed the reins to slip, and to get them back completely is a difficult or even impossible task.

She is now a professional and probably no longer happy with Anandi's influence on the house, husband, her kids. In frustration at comparisons, she throws that bomb shell on Jagya.

Their relationship gets strained. But life continues.

Younger kids are now 11-12 They are developing a personality, opinion, outlook of their own.

They need their space.

Problems happen in all joint families. Between brothers, kids, wives. Comparisons, competition, jealousies. They survive as long as it is possible to live together. They fight. People move out.

It is now time for Anandi too to move out. Let them solve their problems by themselves. If she/her presence is even remotely the reason, let that reason no longer exist.

Very nicely written post 👏 Well articulated 👍🏼

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Stephi

@Stephi

Rocker

Posted: 10 years ago

#40

Ganga knew her husband was not really over his first wife

The same way Shiv knew his wife was not really over her first husband. So ? The ''only ''difference is that Ganga married him when Jagya said that she was the love of his life, while Shiv had to wait for his wife to get over her ex even though they were already married.

@Anandi clearly said that though Dsa thinks of her as beti the past between J and her can't be brushed away.

She said that to whom ? Dadisa or Jagya? It wasn't Jagya who invited her to live in BH . In fact, it was him who clearly said it has nothing to do with him, she should talk to Dadisa . Even though people claim that Anandi lives in BH exclusively because of Dadisa, that her only connection with BH is Dadisa , it seems that she is way much more comfortable with him..

@Why should it always be Anandi? Why can't Ganga look inside her and why can't Jagya look inside him?

Why its never Anandi? Why she can't look inside her for once and say to herself its about time to stop giving lectures to my ex. He's angry, he's happy, he makes mistakes, he's doing well, he has a problems- its none of my business!

@Is she living with the couple or is she living with her grandmother?

Unfortunately, her grandmother lives under the same roof with that couple, inevitably she lives with that couple too and also takes an active part in their personal matters.

@In fact I would like Anandi to say that she would like her son to have more space and a place which he can call his own and that's the reason she would like to leave the house.

That's exactly what she should have said from the beginning, not to talk about possible Jagan marital problems.Or from the beginning she knew that s he can never stop to interfere in his personal matters?

@How can a third person cause a problem in a marriage?

Easily, with the constant interference in their personal matters,the things that do not concern her.

@A man who is in awe of his first wife will continue to be in awe of her and creates problems for his third wife

In awe !? Am I missing something ?

@Shivam does go out of his way to irritate Abhi which is a fact but that is more to do with kids teasing each other If he outshines Abhi how is that his problem?

So we have to accept that Shivam enjoys to irritate Abhi but it is not his problem, has nothing to do with him. Strange.

@Anandi has more rights to Dsa's legacy than her ladesar

16 years of being BH Bahu

2 years BH beti b4 shadi with Shiv

2 years BH beti + KB bahu

11 years BH beti after KB did not see her as bahu

Its been a long time since Sugna doesn't live in BH. Does this mean that she has no rights at all of inheritance?

@I don't want her to think that she or her son are the root cause of the problems in others lives there.

She will never think that. She wil maybe say that , like she said in the precap I should move to SN,immediately after an unpleasant situation, but deep down, she'll never think so. Otherwise, she would have said to her son that it was not polite to talk about someone else's success or marks or whatever and she would never have allowed herself to barge in on Jagan conversation about their personal matters. I wish for once she prove me wrong.

@

She went away to some other place to do her Medicine and her specialisation.

At that tme both her kids were very small.So it was quite helpful to have Anandi around to take care of kids and home.

Well we dont know that. The same way we saw Ganga making food for kids, welcome them from school, Dadisa reading the story to Shivam, Shivam 's attachment to Dadisa etc. so we can assume that this help was mutual or its Dadisa who was helping both of them, Anandi for SN, Ganga for her Medicine and her specialisation.But, I guess the help can't be the same thing a s the over-involvement in other' people personal matters.. Ghena used to have the same problem with Anandi, longtime ago. . And let's not forget Jagya , h e had to be somewhere nearby to take care of their children.

@So she is not obligated towards J or his wife.

No, she isn't so why she has to take an active part in their personal matters?

As for those constant comparisons between Ganga and Anandi, people are astounded why Ganga used to enjoy in these comparisons at the beginning, but not anymore.. I guess these people just like to be constantly compared to the other people.
Ganga was a victim of child marriage, an illiterate, tortured woman.. Of course these comparisons with Anandi was pleasant and gave her the strength that she can also do something of her life. And she did.She has come a long way from the illiterate, uneducated women to the prominent doctor. So why would she enjoy in these comparisons anymore. Didn't she herself achieve the big thing in her career and otherwise ? . What is it that Anandi has done more and better than her? Is making a better tea better thing than to be more educated? Today Ganga is more educated than Anandi. Anandi saves lives in SN? Well Ganga saves lives too in her hospital . The hell in which Ganga lived with Ratan and his family was much harder than anything Anandi has ever experienced . I wonder, who sholud be a role model in this story ?

Edited by Stephi - 10 years ago

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