Does a man deserve a second/third chance - Page 4

Originally posted by: VerboseG

I agree with your mom, Sups.

I do not object to J's pairing with G2 or with anyone else for that matter.

However, there is a time and a place for everything.

I do feel that proper closure has to be given to previous chapters before you move on to a new one.

In this case, not only has J not closed his chapter with G1, but G2 has a very much open chapter with her husband.

I do object to the innuendos that the CVs are giving us vis-a-vis the JG2 pairing. It is much too soon for any of that, I feel.

Originally posted by: Yash.Pal

@supriya: Was so happy to read your post, well thought out and thought provoking. I was lamenting to Samvi earlier today that those days are gone where one could read thought provoking posts on IF and boom came yours. Super.

My view is a man or woman always deserves second chance. But there has to be genuine acceptance of one's mistake. In that context I do not have a problem if Jagya goes with Ganga, but so soon was my only question? Also when Jagya does look for a mate, let Ganga not be thrust upon him by DS. He needs to now know what he is looking for in his life partner and accordingly must go with his heart. The difference between Shiv and Jagya is that Shiv is always composed, has equanimity, calmness in his eyes, knows what he wants and sticks by his principles. Jagya on the other hand didn't have a choice when it came to Anandi, then fell in love with Anandi, then hated Anandi, fell head over heels for Gauri, then hated Gauri, then wanted Anandi back, then forgot Gauri and then went to ask for forgiveness. All very knee jerk in my view and shows a very confused picture of a man, deeply troubled with himself. He needs to stabilise and then decide what it is he wants.

As for genuine love 2nd, 3rd time. Your mother is right. !st time is the one that is soft, from one's heart, very comforting even to think of, remains in one's mind. But a lot of that is infatuation and loving the feeling of "Oh My God, I am in love". But in many cases such marriages based on this "I feel love" syndrome have not lasted. The second one they say is based on what mistakes not to make that one had made before. At the end of the day it is up to the 2 in the relationship, if a man really loves his wife, he will stand by her, move her hair falling over her eyes, and wake up in the morning and look at her and say to himself Thank you God for giving me her as a partner, if that happens then the woman will have to reciprocate because her heart will pick up such messages. 2nd or 3rd time, no matter.

Now what happened to Elizabeth Taylor I don't know 9th or 10th time, will never know now. 😆

Great post.

PS. I forgot to add, had they shown a proper closure on the Gauri scene, it would have been easier to accept the next love-match. Many members and me included are not happy that a child may be born soon without a father and the father does not even know and Gauri has not informed. End of the day the child will be called whatever such children are called in this cruel world. Remember the movie Zakhm? That is a big problem with me.

Originally posted by: Saathfan

I can understand that jagya was a victim of balvivah also. But he consummated his first marriage and kind of sort of loved anandi. Let's wipe out what he did with his first marriage as balvivah results. But as adult he was head over heel in love with gauri for whom he did all this but then for a relatively small reason compared to his mistakes he ditched her too. Let's wipe that part of his life clean too. He came back to jaitsar and wanted anandi back be ause she was his soulmate as per his soul searching. One can get over your past you cannot wipe it out of existence. Sometimes you have to bear the brunt of a single moments mistake for all your life. Here jagya has at least a decade of selfishness and cruelty to pay for. How can a third new romance be part of the healing process for him.

I absolutely do not like jagya Ganga romance. They should have shown joint redemption of gaur I jagya and not roped a New girl. It makes me feel like women in mans life are so replaceable. So I do not agree with your mother love may be something bookish but emotions that bind us have to deep and difficult to break. Jagya has broken those bonds too easily and too many times for me to see him romancing someone else with excitement and not disdain.

Originally posted by: adi2512

Supriya.,

Per me., its not difficult to fall in love...but the most difficult part is the manner you TREAT your love.

We are being shown that J is on a mode of repentance for his past deeds and is on a track of redemption.

Primarily., he wanted to right the wrong he has done to A. But., he had lost the chance by the time he realized it.

So., he has been provided a chance in the form of G2...whose condition / situation at the moment is worse than that of A. ( I'am leaving aside the fact that it took great courage and will power on part of A to reach where she is now..along with the support of his family ...b'coz., that I feel., that is completely irrelevant to this context...its purely the travails of A ).

To start with ., J & A loved each other as they were conditioned to love...being bound into a bond of matrimony at a very young age. They did not even know the sanctity of matrimony when they got married nor the authenticity of Love when they started feeling for each other. But A as a dutiful wife., devoted all her affections to her husband and naturally as any protected young girl in that age and phase loved him...

Her Love was pure., untainted and selfless. As a true lover., all she wanted is his happiness. That is the greatness of her character.

On the other hand., J had his failings. He never truly loved A., and that got him attracted to a more sophisticated life and love.

But what he considered as his true love was again not true. He never truly loved G1 too. If he had loved G1., he would never have treated her in the way he had done. He would have never felt jealous when she scaled higher planes than him. He would have never blindly accepted all her illogical whims & fancies. He had been both immature and insecure and plain jealous.

I would like to point out here., that in the love story of J-G1., both were at an equal fault.

If G1 had wronged him with her lies and insulted his family., He had wronged her too ( in fanning her insecurities and never really appreciating her zeal to escalate career wise ) and insulted his own family.

The love story of AnSh had been gradual ., b'coz., A needed that time.

S had loved A almost from the beginning., but he treated his love fairly and with maturity., till A has come to the point to reciprocate the feelings.

It has been most difficult for A to fall in love once again., as she truly loved J at one point of time., and also she had a bad experience with her love.

So., it took all the time that she needed to once again trust and love somebody.

The case of J is not this. As i said., he never truly loved any body.

So., at this juncture., I really do not have any qualms., as to how fast J would fall in love with G2...but for me., the crux., is How he would TREAT his love.

If he truly loves her now., he would give a fair treatment to her., just as an equal half deserves.

He would encourage her in getting past her torturous past and show her the beauty of live ahead.

He would aid in her education and who knows., may be he would one day., suggest she would become the sarpanch ... ( presuming A would have scaled taller heights by then...😆)

And Yes., he also has a non closure of G1 hanging there like a double edged sword...His true repentance also would depend on the closure he would give to that chapter in his life., as I feel., it is definitely going to glare at him., seeking for justice., in near future.

So., per me., now., the travails of Balak Var are on the beginning., rather than his Love story...

It is to be seen., whether he would rise like a phoenix from ashes as A did...or get buried forever in those ashes.

Concludingly., I do not have any regrets if he falls in love yet again in next few episodes or in fifty but what I would like to see is giving his love the due respect.