Nav berates AbhiM: Epi Air Date: 28 April 2023 - Page 31

Originally posted by: sunshining

ROLF, I was referring to your interpretation of Rumi poem.

Originally posted by: DotDash

Bold 1 - society doesn't accept children without fathers - I am so furious at that dialogue by Nav. Our society has progressed enough that children without fathers are not looked down upon and get decent upbringing and treatment in general in society. But what hasn’t progressed is the mindset of writers who write such dialogue. If he had said father’s love (again not a requisite for child’s upbringing) but I would have still understood that a bit and would have digested it, but father’s name!! Sorry this dialogue was better suited in Victorian era!!

Bold 2 - truth is revealed to Abhir in a mature manner when he is older - that actually does more harm than good. It’s breaks the trust between parent and child if truth came out unintentionally in some form and you can’t control all circumstances. Also the Big Bang approach of revealing the truth is never advised in such cases because it is difficult for an individual to comprehend their life, specifically childhood if they get to know these things later in their life. (Personal experience from adoption counsellor). It’s better to tell the child at young age in age-appropriate manner.

@Bold 1: Same!

@ Bold 2: I am not advising when Abhir is all grown up, I mean when he is closer to 9-10. If Abhi is already an integral part of his life, I don't think he will feel that bad. It will just be like having two fathers than one. But right now, when he has just gotten to know Abhi and still doesn't understand concepts like divorce and stuff, it can be harder. Then again, I have no experience in this, so will revert to your judgment. The thing is I am pretty sure it's going to come out in a horrible way no matter what, so not looking forward to that.

Originally posted by: lagjagale

@Bold 1: Same!

@ Bold 2: I am not advising when Abhir is all grown up, I mean when he is closer to 9-10. If Abhi is already an integral part of his life, I don't think he will feel that bad. It will just be like having two fathers than one. But right now, when he has just gotten to know Abhi and still doesn't understand concepts like divorce and stuff, it can be harder. Then again, I have no experience in this, so will revert to your judgment. The thing is I am pretty sure it's going to come out in a horrible way no matter what, so not looking forward to that.

I dont know about Abhir not being able to understand divorce, step parents etc. Divorce is more commonplace than we think. And a lot of people are re-marrying. Having a step parent is not something that is unusual. It is better that Abhi, Akshara and Abhinav have an understanding in place, a legal one if necessary and all of the involved parties can sit down and have that conversation with Abhir. He has been shown as a mature child and I think explaining things to him will have a better result than him finding out from some where else (which is what I think will happen). Once everyone finds out the truth it is only a matter of time before the kids find out. Having parents involved makes it less complicated and traumatic.

I wish at least in how the child finds out the truth they would use more sensitivity .. but like you said I have a feeling he will find that out in the worst way possible .. hope they will

Surprise us with a rare flash of sensitivity

Originally posted by: jhustju

I dont know about Abhir not being able to understand divorce, step parents etc. Divorce is more commonplace than we think. And a lot of people are re-marrying. Having a step parent is not something that is unusual. It is better that Abhi, Akshara and Abhinav have an understanding in place, a legal one if necessary and all of the involved parties can sit down and have that conversation with Abhir. He has been shown as a mature child and I think explaining things to him will have a better result than him finding out from some where else (which is what I think will happen). Once everyone finds out the truth it is only a matter of time before the kids find out. Having parents involved makes it less complicated and traumatic.

Originally posted by: IAMHope

Lifted from internet

Meaning of Rumi’s “and” ( for those interested)

If I say, lets be friends : YOU and ME.. Our friendship will depend on that "and" between us. Unseen and unknowable. Something in the middle yet far beyond us. Only this understanding of something 'more' working around us will take away this attitude of "I , ME, MYSELF" away. You and me will then be truly connected.

Let us bow before this power of "and" and say thanks to Rumi for having made us face to face with this powerful word that connects us with everything around.

For so many things happening around us many variables are working. We do not see those connecting dots (Rumi's "and"). We take the continuity as granted. Successful are those who keep a close eye on this connecting dots and align their behaviour accordingly.

Sarah Waqar@SarahWaqar07·

Mind is the center of fear & heart is the center of love –don't get confused. You need a clarity abt yr being, abt wat u say, b/c if there is so much confusion in this qs then imagine the confusion in yr mind

Rumi said, heart doesn't knw fear, it only knws love Follow the heart https://twitter.com/ForHarshali/status/1651893456527147009…

Originally posted by: Siri918

Sarah Waqar@SarahWaqar07·

Mind is the center of fear & heart is the center of love –don't get confused. You need a clarity abt yr being, abt wat u say, b/c if there is so much confusion in this qs then imagine the confusion in yr mind

Rumi said, heart doesn't knw fear, it only knws love Follow the heart https://twitter.com/ForHarshali/status/1651893456527147009…

The poetry on the show already makes me anxious and now she's making me loose my marbles 😭😭😭

Originally posted by: jhustju

I dont know about Abhir not being able to understand divorce, step parents etc. Divorce is more commonplace than we think. And a lot of people are re-marrying. Having a step parent is not something that is unusual. It is better that Abhi, Akshara and Abhinav have an understanding in place, a legal one if necessary and all of the involved parties can sit down and have that conversation with Abhir. He has been shown as a mature child and I think explaining things to him will have a better result than him finding out from some where else (which is what I think will happen). Once everyone finds out the truth it is only a matter of time before the kids find out. Having parents involved makes it less complicated and traumatic.

Show khatam ho jayega!! phir Nav puran kaun karega!! 🤣

Originally posted by: jhustju

According to me the only person who can get the story out of this chakrvyuh is Abhimanyu (see what I did there 😉). The story will only move forward when Akshara can actually see Abhi's remorse and repentance. That will only happen if he and Akshara have a heartfelt conversation and he tells her how sorry he is, how much he regrets what happened over the last six years and how even though he cannot change what happened between him and Akshara, he will respect the fact that Akshara is Abhir's primary parent and he will follow her cues. Sometimes to heal a person just needs to hear that the person who wronged them is really sorry. It does not take any grand gestures. Often just the word sorry can start the process of healing. Or he could defend her to his mom/ Goenkas in front of Akshara. Anything that makes Akshara feel heard. Right now Abhimanyu has not acknowledged any wrong doing. He may have admitted it to Shefali but Akshara is not privy to that. Akshara can only see that Abhi pities himself and sees himself as the wronged party. Once she sees some sort of apology or remorse from Abhi, I think she will start to thaw and start making some logical decisions

As far as Akshara is concerned, she has made mistakes and her greatest flaw/ mistake is avoidance. She needs to learn to face things head on. Not telling people Abhir's truth is only postponing the inevitable and making the eventual fall out worse for everyone involved. She needs to be able to hold her head high and tell everyone the facts. Frankly Arohi and Abhi's wedding or Manjari's feelings are none of her damn business but her sons truth is. The truth will come out. You may as well be the one to control the narrative and tell it to people.

This glorification and non stop narration of Abhinav puran needs to stop. We get it he is a good man and I am not being sarcastic, but you dont need to shove it down the viewers and Abhi's throat at every opportunity. They have said that Abhinav is acha so many times that now I have my serious doubts that he is acha

On a different tangent I wish they had used the "tera mujhse hai pehle ka naata koi" song on Abhir, Abhimanyu and Akshara. I love that song and it would have fit so well on the current narrative

Love your breakdown, you've politely pointed out all 3 character's flaws and what the story needs at this point!

Originally posted by: IAMHope

The issue is the makers are twisting this so much, two couples and two children involved. And I know they will not solve it - they will kill one and turn another super villain and drop the hot mess and plunge into season 4 when the kids will have to deal with the outcome. They will create the mess they won’t fix it

Originally posted by: IAMHope

I agree, I cannot believe S3 is so outdated. S2 was far ahead in terms of progressive ideas.

Now I don’t know what age would be best for a child to know his real parents v step. I’m sure there is research to support both options - revealing at say, age 6 versus at 12 when the child can understand the implications in a more worldly way.

I’m of the personal opinion that its important Abhir doesn’t feel he was lied to. Akshara can begin the process by opening up to Abhir about her own childhood and how she had two moms one that birthed her and Seerat that raised her. This will present the idea of biological parent versus step parent to Abhir.

After he soaks that in, he will be able to relate better to Abhi being his biological dad and Nav being his step dad.

What a mess. Roohi on one end and Abhir on the other 🤦🏻‍♀️ .

And you are so right, here if Abhir gets to know the truth but not from his parents then he would feel lied to. Ak as a sensible parent should realise that and use her experience to explain Abhir.

But sensible things won’t happen in the show, so let’s enjoy the rollercoaster