Acha Aadmi? - Page 4

Originally posted by: lagjagale

Those scenes are hardly enough to justify all of this. Anyone would marvel at sonograms and stuff, and yes its not secret that he always wanted a family. My point is, if Ak was in a fragile condition, so was he. Both of them made that decision for the wrong reasons, but it does not make them bad people or reduce how much of a good person he is. Seriously, of course, new parents go through hell, but he was not even the parent until she asked. I am Abhira all the way, but I also don't understand this constant bashing of Nav. He is shown to be a really good person, and most importantly, Ak always had the reins in that relationship. She could have left whenever she wanted to but didn't cause of Abhir and hiding from her family. This decision had zero consequences, the decision that did have consequences was Ak's to hide Abhir's parentage. If she did that through any other means, we would still be at the same point.

My point being him wanting a family and all other acts of kindness doesn’t justify his agreeing to marry - I guess we both agree that it was wrong decision. Ak can leave whenever she want? Not really, this decision created an invisible barrier of debt and gratitude for her - even though he didn’t intend to. So it has an overbearing consequence.

I agree he offered to leave them after Udaipur track but she lead him on - entirely Ak’s decision now. He has been asking her to tell the truth but she refuses.

But all that doesn’t justify his decision back then. I haven’t bashed him for anything else, so there isn’t constant bashing, but why should his wrong be overlooked over all the righteousness?

Ps: No person/ckt is entirely good or bad, but in Nav’s case because he is labelled Acha Aadmi, even his wrong is looked at as been righteous.

Hmm, I understand your point and agree. His wrong decision was also shown as being right. But it was wrong. I don't think he is a bad person cause of it, that's all.

Originally posted by: lagjagale

Hmm, I understand your point and agree. His wrong decision was also shown as being right. But it was wrong. I don't think he is a bad person cause of it, that's all.

He is not a bad person but Acha Aadmi jap/narrative is way too much.

Originally posted by: DotDash

The intention of the post is neither anti-Nav nor pro-Abhira. It is what it says on the tin - about following two points :-

1) Abhinav’s reason to say yes to marrying Ak

2) He being a good friend and husband in 6 years?

I wanted to know what the views are on above.

1. Is it not normal for people to get remarried? When I used to do my internship in family law, I would see people getting remarried within a month. I worked on a dv case where a woman remarried after 3 months of coming out of a 4 year abusive marriage. She was in trauma but found a good man and decided to marry him and everyone was happy for her. Why would Nav say no to her? The only reason would be if she was still married right? He meets a woman in a vulnerable state, gives her food and shelter, and takes care of her and she asks him to marry her and he says yes.

Yes, there would have been circumstances where it would have been wrong. 1. if he knew she was rich and did for the money. 2. He fell in love with her but knew she still loved her ex husband. 3. Her divorce was not finalized. 4. She was mentally unstable and not capable to make the right decision which was not the case after 7 months. 5. He manipulated Akshara and got married to her. Since none of these circumstances are there, any normal person can say yes to getting married. He lived with her for 7 months but never asked her to marry him so would have been fine if she did not ask him after Abhir's birth. It was Akshara's decision to have a father for Abhir, Nav never put that in her head nor made her think he needs a father.

2. He has been a great husband and father. Never imposed herself on her despite falling in love with her. Gave her the space she needed. supported her in pursuing law. Allowed her to make all the decisions she wanted to make. Didn't let her down on giving her the father's rights. Akshara genuinely seemed happy in Kasauli and wanted that life for her - minus the romantic/love life. Once he found out that Akshara might still have feelings for her ex husband, he wanted and even told abhimanyu he will leave. What else does a good husband or a friend does?

Originally posted by: DotDash

The intention of the post is neither anti-Nav nor pro-Abhira. It is what it says on the tin - about following two points :-

1) Abhinav’s reason to say yes to marrying Ak

2) He being a good friend and husband in 6 years?

I wanted to know what the views are on above.

Abhinavs acchayi doesnt reduce with his decision to marry Ak coz his intentions are not malignant....Akshara herself proposed the idea to him because she felt he was worthy and he had earned that right. He accepted it not coz of any evil intentions, he was ready to take up the responsibility and duty of a father.

Originally posted by: DotDash

When Ak met Nav, she was emotionally a mess, grieving and pregnant. Nav helped her during her most difficult time, which was a selfless act.

However when Ak asked him to be “father ji” and he agreed, wasn’t he exploiting an emotional vulnerable woman for his own selfish need of having a child?

He has been a good father to Abhir, but has he been a good friend to Ak for last 6 years - I say friend because they have been in friend zone in spite of being married. He didn’t even know anything about her until Abhi came along. I agree he kept his side of the deal and maintained distance (even emotionally and didn’t pry in her life) - but is that being a good friend - let alone good husband?

In the hospital, right after child birth when Ak asked him to be “father ji”, a decent person should have realised that Ak has had a traumatic experience (even though he didn’t know what but here is a lady with complicated pregnancy who isn’t ready to go back to her family), gone through a difficult pregnancy/delivery and possibly isn’t thinking clearly enough. He could have continued to support her as a friend but by saying yes he trapped her in a decision she made at her most vulnerable time.

Ak was under trauma, but wasn’t Nav’s decision of agreeing to the alliance selfish? So is he really Acha Aadmi?

He offered peace, respect and trust which Abhi failed despite being in love with her so yes he is an achcha aadmi. 😆

Originally posted by: Noorain13

1. Is it not normal for people to get remarried? When I used to do my internship in family law, I would see people getting remarried within a month. I worked on a dv case where a woman remarried after 3 months of coming out of a 4 year abusive marriage. She was in trauma but found a good man and decided to marry him and everyone was happy for her. Why would Nav say no to her? The only reason would be if she was still married right? He meets a woman in a vulnerable state, gives her food and shelter, and takes care of her and she asks him to marry her and he says yes.

Yes, there would have been circumstances where it would have been wrong. 1. if he knew she was rich and did for the money. 2. He fell in love with her but knew she still loved her ex husband. 3. Her divorce was not finalized. 4. She was mentally unstable and not capable to make the right decision which was not the case after 7 months. 5. He manipulated Akshara and got married to her. Since none of these circumstances are there, any normal person can say yes to getting married. He lived with her for 7 months but never asked her to marry him so would have been fine if she did not ask him after Abhir's birth. It was Akshara's decision to have a father for Abhir, Nav never put that in her head nor made her think he needs a father.

2. He has been a great husband and father. Never imposed herself on her despite falling in love with her. Gave her the space she needed. supported her in pursuing law. Allowed her to make all the decisions she wanted to make. Didn't let her down on giving her the father's rights. Akshara genuinely seemed happy in Kasauli and wanted that life for her - minus the romantic/love life. Once he found out that Akshara might still have feelings for her ex husband, he wanted and even told abhimanyu he will leave. What else does a good husband or a friend does?

Originally posted by: Noorain13

1. Is it not normal for people to get remarried? When I used to do my internship in family law, I would see people getting remarried within a month. I worked on a dv case where a woman remarried after 3 months of coming out of a 4 year abusive marriage. She was in trauma but found a good man and decided to marry him and everyone was happy for her. Why would Nav say no to her? The only reason would be if she was still married right? He meets a woman in a vulnerable state, gives her food and shelter, and takes care of her and she asks him to marry her and he says yes.

Yes, there would have been circumstances where it would have been wrong. 1. if he knew she was rich and did for the money. 2. He fell in love with her but knew she still loved her ex husband. 3. Her divorce was not finalized. 4. She was mentally unstable and not capable to make the right decision which was not the case after 7 months. 5. He manipulated Akshara and got married to her. Since none of these circumstances are there, any normal person can say yes to getting married. He lived with her for 7 months but never asked her to marry him so would have been fine if she did not ask him after Abhir's birth. It was Akshara's decision to have a father for Abhir, Nav never put that in her head nor made her think he needs a father.

2. He has been a great husband and father. Never imposed herself on her despite falling in love with her. Gave her the space she needed. supported her in pursuing law. Allowed her to make all the decisions she wanted to make. Didn't let her down on giving her the father's rights. Akshara genuinely seemed happy in Kasauli and wanted that life for her - minus the romantic/love life. Once he found out that Akshara might still have feelings for her ex husband, he wanted and even told abhimanyu he will leave. What else does a good husband or a friend does?

1. Yes,it’s perfectly ok for people to get remarried whenever they choose to. I have never personally seen circumstances you have mentioned so won’t comment on it. Looks like you have ground level experience of this, and better view of it. I presume these women when they got remarried were looking forward to a better, full life with a new person.

But is that what happened in the story. Ak clearly asked him to be just “father ji” not husband (which will be my next point, if he wasn’t living with her as a husband, then how do we say “good” husband). It was a paper/contract/convenience marriage, not a real relationship. So here is a pregnant woman who inspite of having complicated pregnancy is not ready to go back home, nor seek financial help from them, is financially dependant on him during pregnancy, had a traumatic delivery, wakes up after 4 days and straight away ask him to marry her but just to be father of her child but not her husband, is she really in sane mind, is she really giving herself a second chance? And if a guy knowing all this agrees to the marriage then what are his reasons? Didn’t he agree to the marriage because he also just wanted to be the father of the child.

I am not saying that Abhinav is evil and that this was his master plan from beginning. If Ak hadn’t proposed I don’t think he would have initiated anything but I think his acceptance even after Ak proposed was not right, it was selfish. He did not spare a thought for Ak or what all this implied but just took the opportunity.

2. Now if it was paper marriage for 6 years, even though they were living under the same roof but were not in a real relationship, then how come he was a good husband for 6 years? Just living under same roof and providing monetary support (Ak was doing her part too) makes him a good husband? real relationship isn’t needed? In my view, during their 6 years together they were at best flat mates who shared a house, finances and a kid together (🤦🏻‍♀️). She didn’t give him any more right, he never asked for more as per their agreement. He maintained emotional and physical distance. So if she was living with someone as a flat mate (even though it is labelled as husband in world’s view), why should he prevent her from pursuing any career, or taking any decision. Why should he impose himself on her when he started developing feeling? It definitely makes him a decent person for keeping his side of deal and respecting boundaries that they agreed but not a good husband coz he isn’t a husband in any sense yet.

They started a real relationship only after Udaipur track. From what writers have shown they get along well and resolve their differences quite amicably. But I think this is because they weren’t emotionally involved yet. They do have compatible personalities. But in my opinion when you start to get emotionally involved with a person, dynamics of the relationship could change. So good husband? - he could be eventually but I don’t think they are there yet.

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I am not bashing him for anything else except the marriage decision. To his credit, he did advice Ak to tell Abhi about Abhir during Kasuli visit. When he realised “aisan ka pati” part, he wanted to walk away. But all this doesn’t justify his decision back then. And I do not agree with the narrative going on that he is a good husband as I don’t think he has been in a husband role yet.

As I have written in my previous post, No person/ckt is entirely good or bad, but in Nav’s case because he is labelled Acha Aadmi, even his wrong is looked at as been righteous.

Originally posted by: MuguetDScorpion

He offered peace, respect and trust which Abhi failed despite being in love with her so yes he is an achcha aadmi. 😆