Sameer's Condition & Predicament: Naina's Decision & Results - Page 2

Bang on post...

Indeed a great post which stressed on the real scenario and during 90s girls use to end relations giving importance to family and today thee are boys who are doing this. It's one of my personal experience where the boy is not ready to face the challenges in the future and he even was not ready to tell his mom that he loves a girl and ended his relationship with her and the girl still didn't marry yet not able to come out of that. I'm not blaming anyone it's good today girls are fighting for their love and at the same time there are girls who even give up easily today. But I agree with you as girls will move on quickly when compared to boys there will be very few who will not be able to come out. But as per the serial sameer will get her out of the fear and will stand by her side. He will turn into a matured person overal. Sorry for typo and grammatical errors as I'm not good at writing so plz forgive me if any errors found. Apart from a best surgeon you are good writer as well. Only few people will be blessed with such qualities. Plz do write often when you get time.

What a lovely post Doc. It brings out how society views girls and boys actions in situation like this. Society is not always objective hence this generalization I believe. I have come across to boys and girls being in the situation like this and have seen how mentally fragile they become. When you love someone deeply then breaking apart for societal reasons become too much to accept and embrace.

Amazing post & analysis.You are really a good writer & Sad to read about the suicide of your friend for a girl.It do looks stupid for others but for some boys or even some girls ,they really cant get out of this .More so in 90's move on was really difficult.I myself has experience this .I have only seen one successful colege love story that too due to the guts of both girl & boy.There is undue pressure on girl to settle down fast & many times they hv to give in as the boy may not be settled.But if you really love than you shd really give time.Sometimes it happens that the intensity of one person's love is more than that of other.& he or she suffers.But yes girls do move on faster & somewhere i have seen most girls act selfish .I have always though that Pyar agar kiya to Nibhao or else say no early.Not to destroy a boys life.In many cases they loose trust on women & girls for the lifetime

Great post!

Amazing post Doc😃👏

Originally posted by: WeRockTheWorld

When one gets ditched in love, it either makes them or breaks them. That is the truth. But I agree with you ...that guys when ditched they take time to get out of it. I did write in one of the post , how one of my batch mates took nearly a decade to accept someone else into his life. Again the situation was similar the girl got a proposal from a guy who was financially settled and my batch mate being her batch was yet to establish...he did even speak to her parents to give him some time...but nothing happened...she could have convinced her parents but she chose not to ...in the end..she got married to someone else.

I think its because from a younger age, girls have been tutored to think that if they get married to person who parents suggest then they would be happier and secure. Women in general when they find a life partner they always chose some one with whom they would feel secure...and financial stability does play a huge role in getting this ideology of "being in a secured "relationship.

And in many cases when girls have tended to choose their own life partner have had failed marriages because they were not able to withstand the challenges that fell on them later in their life. In the end they fear the lack of support from parents as they chose to stand by their love. So, most of them prefer to play it safe when decisions have to be made.

I personally have been at that juncture years ago ..so I know how it feels and taking a decision isn't that easy because on one side you have people who have raised you , gave you loads of love and took care of your needs for 20 plus years. On the other side you have a person you love n want to lead the rest of your life loving him. I also believe that if one can discard people who took care of you for the person ( life partner ) whom you met few years/months back then during a crisis you might not even take much to ditch your life partner. You don't let go your old set of relations/family to accept new ones.

I chose not to agree to marry someone else and not to marry the person I love as I couldn't hurt my family or him. I decided to stay single...they knew I was not going to give in...and I was into my late 20s...had a professional degree, had a job , was financially independent ...so they gave in ...Even today , when relatives gather /meet for any functions I am not considered as an ideal girl as I kind of forced my family to accept someone I chose...so yes , the way society looks at a girl who opted for a love marriage is not looked upon in a very nice way... No one thinks that she stood by the man whom she fell in love with rather is always looked upon as girl who defied her family and social norms.

So cant entirely blame girls...but times are changing . Todays girls do stand up and speak their mind and is nice to see that they know what they want in life . They are very confident and have plans for their future. And parents are also a lot more understanding and friendly to their kids. The whole parent- kid dynamics have changed.

( I have never understood why they call it LOVE MARRIAGE...just because girl/boy decide to chose their life partner...the way they say it is like , people who chose arranged marriage have NO LOVE in their relationship...I believe love or arranged doesn't matter once married its all the same...ROFL...)

Here in this serial , Naina from day 1 she knew this love affair is not going to be easy but her brother's behaviour and fathers action did pull the ground away from her feet ..to top it all her friend's comment broke all her confidence. So I think its nice she took this decision because she needs to understand the importance of Sameer in her life...( Her statement that no one has loved her as much as he has will play an important role soon. What she has towards her chacha and chachi is not love its obligation. ) more than that she needs to know how to stand by a relationship and respect it. Even with Preethi she doesn't completely stand by her ...this is going to be a lesson to both. I am eagerly waiting to see how Sameer is going to get her back. I have always felt he is a very determined person . He will not let go anything that he thinks , belongs to him...this includes his Naina. So yes , I agree Naina didn't do it right , and she will soon realise it. She will never be happy if she marries anyone else. His face will keep appearing. Its Karma, that when you hurt someone , you are bound to get hurt sooner or later...what you give in life is what you get back!!

Originally posted by: Dr.Don

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">Hey Rock,</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">I have one word for you : RESPECT!</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">It takes a lot to take a stand (without insulting anyone), waiting patiently but leaving none of the persons you love.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">You took a tough stand, but a very sensible stand. You tested yourself. you tested the relation with your love (now husband) as he also waited for you, and you also showed the respect to your parents.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">Regarding people or relatives having notion for you, I have this to say: Relatives are a rare breed. Some are true but majority are either jealous of you or do not have selfless love for you. It is always need based.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">The only way to shut them is to get on with your life emphatically and with conviction. The precious aspect about love (any kind) is that it shows even when you are not trying to show off.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">As long as that is there between you and your hubby, rest all is immaterial.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">In many ways, you are in a perfect situation - being both of you professionally qualified and mentally sorted. Another aspect is time. Time flows ! The same relatives who seem too nosy will be older in a decade and will have other issues on their mind.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">So, you make sure that you enjoy every aspect that is possible with you partner, without bothering much about the so called relatives. They will keep finding new people to talk about.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">****************************************</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">The aim of this post is not to put blame on any gender.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">At the same time, I wanted to state what I have seen in all my experiences. Yes, being a man, many will say I am biased.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">But I guess I am not biased. For example, I explained my OS co-relating with Naina a female character. I strongly felt the situation of the character at that time.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">But right now, the same character of Naina, is exactly doing what I have seen since my teenage. The same happened with me. (Though reason was not family pride).</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">I just wanted to put forward, what young boys go through when they are abandoned by the Girl (after all the rantings of love). Suddenly Love life marriage is secondary to the "I can't talk to my parents" and the very person whom you kept giving impression of the beauty of love.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">If one thinks utter practically then all makes sense. But it is always easier to advise to be practical from the outside.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">This is what many "Nainas" do and move on.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">But,</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#990033">Some Nainas successfully move on with a new man. Some do not.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#660099">Some "Nainas" end up regretting their mistake as their new LOVE/Family approved husband is not what they hoped and they are reduced to life long adjustment.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#003366">There are some "Sameers" like the junior who could not survive when their Naina subbed them without any reason. (Money is irrelevant in this case. The junior was from a one of the richest families in the state. He could have married any beautiful, rich and attractive girl and eventually find love again. But he could not survive.)</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2">Some "Sameers" though unable to accept that their Naina ditched him (Like in Todays Episode) ... Look back after some years and realize they had a NARROW ESCAPE from a stressful married life (where they would have been only reduced to fulfil all the obligations of their Naina - just give and give with limited getting back. It would have always been about Naina - Me me me & my family)</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">There can be so many combinations.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">Thank you for reading and commenting. And congrats to your husband. He has a feisty and strong lady as the life partner.</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">Regards</font>

<font face="Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif" size="2" color="#0000cc">Dr. Don</font>

Thank you Dr. Our parents teach us to be strong and independent. They teach us concepts of trust , honesty and purity in love. When kids grow , they decide to choose their life partner then all these teachings for a toss...suddenly you see a very different shade of their character. I have never understood why this happens?? They forget what they taught their kids and would want kids to back track on this...which isn't right.

Naina is not following what is taught to her by her chacha ji. She is going against of what she has learnt. This is not being righteous. People collapse in front of family when they have to choose between righteous decision vs family.

Isnt this what Krishna told Arjun when he found it difficult to wage a war against his near and dear once. All his years of teaching just failed miserably in front of his family.

In yesterday's episode Naina was lost in the love for her Chacha Chachi that she was not able to think logically. Even when Sameer was questioning her about her attitude and asked her to be righteous , all she could say is that she will never bring any shame to her family...in reality her decision itself is a shame when it comes to her up bringing . She wasn't able to handle what was taught to her . She failed not only in love but also in her upbringing. Some times kids will have to stand up and show mirror to parents so that they understand their mistakes.

But what to do Chacha Chachi is also not a strong character...they too collapse in front of the concept called"ELDERS ARE ALWAY RIGHT".

Do you think Naina will be happy in her marriage . Will she be able to do justice to a new man who walks into her life?? Its a different case for Sameer. He was ditched so later on if he chooses to marry he wouldn't feel that bad because the new girls affection will wipe out the pain...but for Naina the weight of her guilt will always be there and when ever she looks at her husband she will only think of Sameer. She will never be able to live a life free of guilt. In fact distancing Sameer from her life is the greatest mistake she is doing because for her he might be physically away but emotionally he will be right in front of her ..all through out her life!!

Extremely well written and very touching write up doc.I agree with you on most of your points.