Hi buddies! I am here with my One Shot. š
First thing first, thank you Pallavi, for providing me with this opportunity to write here. Just being part of this along with such amazing authors makes me feel amazing (and apprehensive as wellš).
[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TOonGNsslvY[/YOUTUBE]
The song I have chosen is "Mora Piyaa...(Female Version)" from the film Raajneeti. This is composed by Aadarsh Srivastava and sang by the very soulful Kavita Seth.
The song is based on Raga Darbari and is supposed to be sung in midnight. The main flavour in this song is solitude and melancholy.
So, I have tried to capture the feels' related to the said raga! The One-Shot is set in the backdrop of the times when IshRa actually ponder over the chances of second chance Love... Had always wanted to see Ishita's wanting for Raman. So yeah, you get to see a little bit of her desperation here.š
Hope you will enjoy!š
One Shot: Tell Me, You Love Me
She hated waiting for him. These days she could not sleep until she saw him in this room, safe and sound. And, she hated this fact even more, that he affected her and how! Never did she cheat in her studies, but then why could not she determine the reasons for the conditional insomnia that she would experience, the flutter in the chest when he would look at her... maybe he was right after all, dentist were not doctors.
Really now, Ishu! She kept the book dejectedly on the couch that she was trying to focus upon from the last 15 minutes, offended with her own thoughts. Everything that she would think, would ultimately lead to him making her think over the chances of developing OCD. She strode rapidly towards the balcony not without keeping the lights alive, contrary to her own lectures of saving energy, as he called it, lest she felt too lonely.
Oh Damn! Lectures! They said it right, empty mind is the home of devil. She needs to do something... do what in the middle hours of night? She thought she would go back to the book, as it promised a happy ending... oh how she loved happy endings! But, she could not curb the apprehension of his arrival, so she could not leave the place.
No! NO! Not again. Sing! Yes, she should sing something. She was perfect at Classical Music. In the solemn night, with the melancholic heart that yearned for a company... what else than Raag Darbaari? Her insides almost twisted with the craving for a glance of him as the prolonging wait made her anxiety of his safety rise, every second.
There were truths that were bitter, then there were things which were not absolutely bitter, but somehow acknowledging them was too challenging... just like it was lethal for her to accept the kind of yearning she felt for him. Conceding them ran the risk of disappointment and denial. So, she thought it was better to rogue herself, than to get despaired. She hummed along to block her mind from connecting with her heart...
"Mora Piyaa...
Mora Piyaa Mose Bolat Naahi...
Dwaar Jiyaa Ke Kholat Naahi..."
A screeching halt in the premises brought her voice into halt as well. Finally. She inhaled few quick breaths as she fell short of breath unbeknownst to herself. She saw him descending from the car and his face spoke that he had his grumpy mood intact with him. And here she was hoping. The worse aspect of her situation is knowing what she hoped from him and being confident that each one of them will shatter into pieces. Unfortunately she had hoped for reciprocation of her love from him, she dreamt about him every moment of her life and she had linked him with each second of her survival.
The realisation had dawned upon her he would never be hers, or worse, he won't be anyone's. Having pondered upon the issue of mending a broken heart, she had come to the conclusion it was impossible. And she? She must be a little too shameless. As time passed she got more and more acquainted to the fact that Sapnein, sapnein hote hain...! And still she could not help dreaming in spite of being aware of the fateful ending.
"Aise Naa Mose Pher Najariyaa...
Dekh Suratiyaa Ankhiyan Uthake..."
She had quickly dipped into the couch and earthed herself under the duvet closing her eyes, what if he knew about this new addition in her daily routine -- waiting for him! She didn't have the energy in her to face him, and face herself to counter her own heart's treachery. But, wasn't uncertainty the most certain thing in her life? She felt him coming towards her and placing her book on the shelf. She felt him halting in his tracks and turning back. Quite to her surprise, she felt him tucking the duvet more into her. Her heart raced. This dysfunctional heart of hers will be the end of hers! When did he become so caring?
Her breath got hitched in her throat as she felt him kneeling beside her, almost leaning towards her. She sensed his thumb tracing the outline of her face. She searched for some space to sink more into the couch! Alas! There wasn't any. Neither in the couch, nor between them. She felt herself go paralysed when he softly kissed her forehead. Was she already dreaming? But she hadn't slept yet. Oh why didn't she sleep?Had she slept, she would never wake up and let this dream break. But, it wasn't a dream, it was real. Reality is Deceiving!
Yes, it was deceiving. She felt him move slowly. But, no she would not let him go. She needed to draw a line between Reality and Dreams, she needed to distinguish between Hopes and Delusions. She caught his arm and pulled him towards her, her force made him still. And the next second she had embraced him from his back, hugging him possessively. She pitted her tired frame against him and stood as still as him capturing the moment.
"Tose Lipat Ke Marr Jaaungi...
Jaane Naa Dungi Baiyaan Chhurake..."
Impulse was a peril. She didn't know how to face the situation that she had created between them. But, was there any other way than facing it. It was better that her dreams would shatter in a moment than choking for breathe every instant. But, even after a minute she felt his frame as rigid and stiff as ever. Too stubborn, wasn't he?
"Bedardi Tu... Peer Jiya Ki Kaheko Puchhat Naahi..."
Her lips have quivered as she had taken his name as it had felt so unusual suddenly, "Ra... Raman!" she had uttered moving away a little from him, yet fisting the material of his shirt. No visible response had come. Why is he making this so hard? At least, he can scream on her, accuse her. She would bear with it. But, silence had been slewing her off. Could not he sense she had been longing for him, yearning for him all this time?
"Janam Janam Ki Preet Hai Apni,
Mohe Apni Jaan Bana Ley...
Tohe Kasam Hai... O Nirmohi...
Rooth Naa Mose Darwaa Lagale..."
"Can you love me Raman?" she had asked him the silliest question keeping her heart at stake. She had known the answer would not be affirmative. Then, she had also known that denial was better than pinning hopes against hopes. She was exhausted of expecting and then trying to undo the expectations.
She had felt him stir and her heart had burst in strange anticipations, strange and optimistic, only to be ruptured in the next instant, when his curt but easy reply had pierced through her soul, "No. I can't"
She had felt angry. Angry on herself for the wishes she had made, for the dreams she had dreamt. But, she had unleashed the anger on him, she had felt too hopeless on herself. She had tried to turn him around with wild force but in vain. So, she had clenched her jaw and shouted, "Why? Why can't you love me?"
"What if I deny the Love the next morning? Would be able to deal with that?" Will he be able to deal with that? He had screamed and held his position not wanting to face her. After a few moments she had loosened her grip on him. She had felt her life-force leaving her bit by bit. She could feel it distancing away from her quietly.
"Mose Koyi Bhool Huyi Kaa...
Tu Mohe Dekhat Naahi..."
He had turned around and held her hand strictly than ever before and muffled almost inaudibly, "I trust you, but I can't trust me." He had continued while she had looked down on the floor, "Some other time Ishita, when I can trust myself never to hurt you... I will Love you then"
And then he had picked her up in his arms in one swift motion, without giving her chance to react. Laying her down on the bed he had whispered in her ears, as drops of tears has silently escaped his eyes, "So jaao Ishita. Sapnein dekho... Now that I have got you, I know our dreams will come true"
...
PS: I am so unsure about this, ki what do I say. The original thing that I wrote met with tragedy, I mean got deleted as my laptop hung. (Technology hates me... must have taken panga with some technology geek in my previous birth) I wrote this off at last moment, and I fear this is clumsy! I am so sorry for not being able to turn up here with my best. Didn't want to disappoint you, but there was nothing I could do to recover the real thing!
Edited by _DarkLady_ - 10 years ago
Real Estate
Iss Pyaar Ko Kya Naam Doon
