Playing With Fire
"Man may have discovered fire, but women discovered how to play with it."
Candace Bushnell, Sex and the City
Holy mother of god, the Madrasan really did outdo herself.
Had he said she looked like his mom just sometime back? Shit! He ought to be more careful.
This was revenge - her revenge on him, he can so tell and for the love of god, he cannot figure out what is stronger right now - the agony he feels or the ecstasy.
Agony because he cannot touch her, ecstasy because he knows it is all for him - only him. She is his and his only. Only he can't have her - yeah there comes the agony once again.
Agony wins hands down. However, ecstasy is not giving up the war that easy. Not at all, why would it when it has her as its ally and does it ever.
The pink lips, that ravine hair and that smile are out to kill him tonight.
Yeah he should definitely provoke her more; only he should be careful when to do it, as right now the woman has him by the balls - literally and figuratively. Okay only figuratively...as for literally... no, no, no Raman do not go there - not now, not here.
Damn!
He is infamous for his razor-sharp tongue, which never fails him, he relies on for his comebacks that scald those who mess with him, but he prides himself for his quick wit and impromptu thinking. His mind is his weapon and unfortunately, for him - the very weapon is working against him now.
Oh, boy is it ever!
The moment she stepped in looking like a vision, he could not believe his eyes. Was it really her- his wife? He knows she is a beautiful woman; it is not as if he has been blind to the obvious fact, it did not take their marriage for him to notice it. Not really, but marriage is working as a revelation to him all right.
He remembers that rainy night they were stranded on the road after he had rescued her from some goons. She had been shivering from the cold and he had noticed it and walked up to her to offer his coat. He could not hand it over to her nor drape it around her - it did not seem appropriate then but he vividly recalls the effect of that night, of her on him. When they had finally found a ride in that auto he had allowed her to leave alone but they had later ended up together. He recalls the phone call her then fianc made to her, her reply confirming she was with him then. He had asked her why did she not lie and her answer at the time - she never lies until need be had for a moment just pissed him off - but he had found himself admiring her for a moment there, wondering do women like her exist really? Women who do not lie and cheat. He had had no idea they would be married one day then but she had impressed him there.
He had not allowed himself to ponder much on the attraction he had felt for her then or once when he was nursing her in her clinic.
Lately though he is finding it hard to ignore the growing allure - the subtle fire that he knew existed. That green dress had been the first time she had him speechless- he had to admit she oozed oomph in it though he had teased her later. The moments she drew near him while sewing the button on his shirt next were a new brand of hell for him.
Post Shagun he did not lose his libido completely but he never was more aware of it than with her. The women he met since Shagun always seemed like her- shallow, narcissistic, greedy, home wreckers, cheaters, liars, manipulators and opportunists. They physically aroused him but mentally and emotionally disgusted him beyond words.
He had tried to visit an escort once too but he simply could not go through with it. He had ended up sending the payment without even meeting her. He was not been raised in the way- he cannot even imagine what would make women so desperate or helpless enough that they would prostitute themselves. Alcohol became his reprieve.
He could damage himself but he cannot resort to sinking so low as to take advantage of a woman who could be genuinely so needful she has no other options left.
It has been years since he has wanted a woman and now that he does - his wife at that he cannot approach her. Damn Raman Bhalla you have to draw the short stick always.
That sneaky woman has slowly and steadily creeping up on him since. It was that blue dress later. He remembers that night so intensely even now - she amazed him that night with her beauty once again- she had looked stunning, downright ravishing and he was so pissed because with each moment he had wanted her more. They had been all alone too but of course, he could not benefit from it. The only activity they could profusely partake in was fighting and that night even that seemed to incite him more. Something about her ingenuousness coupled with that temper of hers makes her so much desirable when she is all riled up. The woman does not know how very badly he has to hold back sometimes when they are at loggerheads - oh, the things he wishes he could do to her - they could do together.
If she gets half an inkling about the nature of his thoughts he fears his life would be a living hell - she had pirouetted so cheerfully in that green dress and he had had to remind himself so very much - she may be his wife but she is off limits. He can look but he can never touch.
He has been looking after all even before that. Only now she knows it - and knows it well, he had to open his damn mouth about the 360 degree comment.
He is sure she enjoyed the moment when he kept looking at her as a fool with his jaw dropped, so much so she had to snap her fingers to bring him back to reality. Hell what is a man supposed to do when his wife walks in looking like that.
She is temptation personified and he wants to give in. Damn it he wants to sin. Is it sinning though if it is your own wife you desire?
She is laughing now with her sisters - saying something and he wishes he could butt in, grab her hand and drag her somewhere - somewhere private where no one dares disturb them.
Yeah, he should but he cannot.
His mouth feels dry, his legs seem like jelly and he has trouble walking. He hopes no one notices the change in his gait or a prominence in his pants. He would die of mortification before he would of the sheer pain he is in right now.
He needs a shower or maybe just a few minutes to relieve himself - he is about to make his way towards the men' washroom when Tandon grabs him to introduce to a few friends. Crap!
His mind is hazy and he lets no sign of his discomfort known but it is getting so much more difficult now.
He kept thinking things - so many things to keep him in control - reminded his mind the command down boy so many times, he feels embarrassed. It is as if he is a teenager all over again who just discovered he has testosterone. She makes him feel like one so very much.
To anyone looking his way he seemed like a man enjoying a conversation, to him he was a man on a mission - he had to stop thinking about her. About the way she looks right now and of all the things he has running on his mind he imagines them doing.
He thought of things, nonsensical things - stuff bound to make him affect his fragile state and make it more agreeable. He recalled the worst teachers he had, the first time he got a C in his exams, the bullies from his school and college and when none of it worked - he recalled the night he had spent with his father-in-law who would not stop coming onto him, thinking it's his wife beside him.
That had worked too... yeah he had lost all his drive there, only the next moment things changed.
Finally, he excused himself, only for things to take a worse turn.
He was about to reach Mihir when she suddenly came out of nowhere and collided with him. His quick reflexes came into action and she was in his arms the next moment. Her eyes were closed for a few brief seconds, but then she opened them - realizing she has not fallen down rather she is being held on by a strong pair of arms. His arms.
Their faces were a few inches apart at best and she smelled divine.
God damn it! He had not picked up on that earlier and he just got himself under control. Shit!
He backed out immediately from the almost-embrace and noted she was looking at him peculiarly.
"Raman, are you ok? "She asked gently.
Her tone made him defensive without meaning too.
"Of course why won't I be alright and what is wrong with you why do you have to always keep running like the blind?" he said gruffly.
"It's just... you... "She stopped mid-sentence and suddenly her hand was on his forehead
When she touched his neck with the back of her hand, his pulse skyrocketed. Her touch was so soft, so gentle - her skin satin like. This was making things perilous for them and he had to rein himself in.
He brushed her hand aside brusquely and took a step back, stupid woman - he would not be responsible for his actions if she did not stop - can't she see that.
"What's wrong with you and why are you touching me, hands off."
She was affronted naturally at the accusation,
"I was just checking your temperature you are sweating in an AC room, trust me I have no intentions in touching you whatsoever."
"Oh yeah? Seems to me you cannot stay away from me, in a room full of at least a hundred other people - you had to collide with me and only me. Doesn't take a genius to figure out what's going on here?"
"Were you dropped on your head as a child or something? Because that is the lamest thing, I have ever heard. I ran into you by accident- Ruhi was playing with my mobile when I tried to get her to stop so she could eat something, she ran away with it I was worried she may fall down and was chasing her when we bumped into each other. I never even saw you coming."
"Wow what a convenient excuse!"
"Excuse? Seriously, I am not interested in touching you not today - not in this lifetime, I have a far better taste and I don't tend to indulge in junk food when I can have gourmet."
"What did you just say?"
"What you heard, I am not interested in you. I would never be, so get that into your mind. God what does this man think of himself? I could have had so much better options, still can. "
She is about to leave shaking her head, when he grabs her hand and before she can create a scene takes her outside in the parking lot which was for the moment vacant.
"Leave my hand, what's your problem Raman?" She yells at him but it's of no use.
They are in a dark remote corner of the lot far away from the entrance when he finally manages to corner her and leaves her hand. The moment she tries to leave, his hands trap her - and she is standing against a dark sedan with her back to it and with him in front.
"What do you want Raman? Let me go."
"Not before I have finished."
"I don't wanna hear anything."
"You have too. I am NOT ASKING YOU, I am telling you... I won't hear you speak to me like that ever again. Get it!"
"Else what? You think I am scared of you. Raman Kumar Bhalla get off that high horse if that's where you are, you don't scare me. And I can say whatever I want, and will do so."
"Shut up, just shut up alright. I have had enough with your nonsense. You mocked me before by comparing me with actors and I was fine, I understood that and it was okay. You praise that jiju of yours to the skies in front of me I even tolerated that, but if you ever and I mean ever think of another man Ishita, I swear to god you haven't seen the worst of me yet."
She pushed him hard for that,
"What the hell? I was talking about other men to marry you idiot. I was cursing my fate that it had you in it - the most egoistic jackass ever born and you think I would... Raman you are an idiot, a moron. God why did I have to end up with this man?"
She is about to walk off when he holds her hand,
"I am sorry Ishita...god I lost it there, please forgive me. I lose my temper sometimes you know that."
"Losing your temper is no excuse for those words. What kind of a woman do you take me for Raman Bhalla? You drive me absolutely crazy and sometimes I pray just so that I have enough patience to not strangle you, you idiot but you still are my husband and I wouldn't cheat on you."
"I know that, I do Ishita. I am sorry, please forgive me." he admits meekly.
"Yeah that's so obvious isn't it?"
"I said I am sorry didn't I?
"Sorry doesn't make everything right." She wouldn't look at him and that hurt him more.
Gently he touched her face with his free hand and made her look at him,
"Ishita I promise I will never say anything like that again. I know my temper is no excuse here, imagine yourself in my shoes for a moment. I just misunderstood your words - that option thing somehow I... I stopped thinking clearly for a moment. I trust you, you know that - I have always didn't I prove your innocence. Would I have done that if I didn't trust you? Please it was a slip of the tongue Ishita, it happens I am human, I make mistakes."
"Okay."
The one word was a source of relief to him.
"Let's go inside now people may be looking for us already." he said.
"Wait, what if someone asks us where we were all this while?" she asked him confused.
He had a naughty twinkle in his eye when he replied,
"Oh don't worry about that if anyone asks us I will just say my wife dragged me outside... she was getting ... frustrated."
Her jaw dropped at his audacity, but somehow she had begun learning the ropes of this game he played, Raman Bhalla you would not win easy this time she thought,
He figured he would hear some banal protest from her end but never saw what he had coming, for she moved closer to him and as she did he could swear he heard his heartbeat ringing in his ears, his palms felt sweaty and his eyes widened a bit.
"Right hubby dearest... I think that is what you should say... after all a wife has to pay attention to her husband and if he keeps on walking funny and stares at you every ten seconds, especially your backside you have to help the poor man out somehow. It's what a good wife does right? After all, it would be so embarrassing to both of you... if his lack of control got out especially when the party has just begun. Things ending prematurely are so not a good sign. "
She walked off with the last word and the last laugh back to the party while he stood there mortified,
"Did she just say that? Does it imply what I think it does? ... she said... that I ... prematurely... OH MY GOD!"
Raman Bhalla stood horrified with his jaw dropped and eyes huge for entirely different reasons than the ones that had him committing the same act barely an hour ago.
His wife had finally stepped up her game and for once, his mind was too zapped to think of a comeback. Given her implication communication was of no use, damn he would have to prove to her with his actions - he hopes the day arrives soon else he would go bat shit crazy for sure if the woman keeps this up.
Edited by EkPaheli - 11 years ago
Ishaani
4