More proof Anuj needs a parenting class

Wow.  Just finished watching the street fight between Pops and Aadhya.

This woman leaves the two of you, high and dry five years ago-you don’t manage your own emotions about it and you don’t manage your child’s emotions and you don’t go to therapy to help process the trauma of a mother/wife walking out on the family.

Anuj never has actual heart-to-heart conversations with truth with his daughter… You can even see this in earlier episodes he would always just tell her to stop crying, or tell her everything is ok—-but would never actually have straightforward conversations… (even Anupama had more straightforward conversations with CA).  Anuj was not good at the difficult part of parenting- he was just good at the fun part.

 So it’s never been a pattern for him to be honest and have conversations with his child.

They walked away from India , and he basically never talked about it and made it seem like that he would always choose his child over his wife.  That Aadhya was safe with pops. He was there for her.

And now suddenly he is yelling at the child and telling her that she has to understand his emotions-  that this is her mother and she needs to respect her etc. etc. blah blah blah

it was Anuj telling Aadhya that she has to respect her mother that really pissed me off-Aadhya does not have to respect that woman who walked out on her and emotionally neglected her.  

So to have the one and only person that Aadhya trusts (her pop) suddenly turn around and become super angry and shutting her down and saying she “has to be respectful”. That was just super triggering- I feel like he broke his daughter in that moment.

I feel so sad for Aadhya 

I dint watch the episode, mostly not watching just seeing clips here and there.

But based on your post I feel that this is the same pattern of the show. They don't dig into the root cause of the issues and just touch upon the surface. Then throw some old moral lessons that's it. This happened again and again in Shah family the treatment of kids, the same dialog by anupama ki "bado ki izzat karo" for the bade like Leela etc.

One can earn respect, it can't be forced. This applies on everyone even the smallest kids.

Exactly this!  Back to the same old patterns!  I can’t believe this is the same guy who LEFT ANUPAMA on his own to live with Maya just to be with CA.  So frustrating 

Agree. Anuj has been a big disappointment as a father lately. He out of all should be knowing the reasons behind CA's anger. He out of all should understand it better. Sad Adhya's parents who are also the LEADS are so back-dated in this ultra modern show that they still harp on age and relation to demand respect, and don't focus on earning it. This is how we'd protect our children and kids from abusive, neglecting elders and predators. So much for sending message to the society. 

She is acting like a brat here, arguing with her father and in the street. Anupamaa has her issues, but she walked away 5 years ago for a reason. To let hatred for your mother grow and foster in your child’s heart is poor parenting. Choti Anu was manipulated into believing something that wasn’t true. She’s held onto that misconception for years and it’s burned in her heart. Why not get her help? Why not call Anupamaa and demand an answer? No let’s change your name and let you grow up disrespectful and hateful; that’s much better!

Originally posted by: LoLo

She is acting like a brat here, arguing with her father and in the street. Anupamaa has her issues, but she walked away 5 years ago for a reason. To let hatred for your mother grow and foster in your child’s heart is poor parenting. Choti Anu was manipulated into believing something that wasn’t true. She’s held onto that misconception for years and it’s burned in her heart. Why not get her help? Why not call Anupamaa and demand an answer? No let’s change your name and let you grow up disrespectful and hateful; that’s much better!

You gotta be kidding me. AnupaMAA had reasons to walk out of her marriage and a kid ?  There is no reason good enough ever, in any world, to live your child.  And what was that we are calling ‘misconceptions’ here ? Fact was she constantly neglected CA. Car incident was the last straw. 

If Anuj is a good father, he’d take CA far far away from such bad experience she had in her life in the name of AnupaMAA. CA and Anuj both deserve better. 

Both Anuj and Adhya or whatever were being influenced by others. I don’t agree with leaving your child, but if she stayed where would it have ended? As she said, “if there are so many complaints, how will the relation last?” If we want to get down to it, wasn’t Choti’s adoption the beginning of Anuj and Anupamaa’s problems? Maya and her drama and their first separation? Couldn’t Anupamaa hate her now too? Let’s agree to disagree here. A child who hates so much in her heart needs help. Her disrespect of both parents shows that. She would have eventually ended her parents’ relationship anyway. Are we to believe that if Shruti becomes Anuj’s wife, all will be well with CA/Adhya? What’s to stop her from ending their relationship if she feels wronged?

As far as the car accident she knew CA would be fine if she didn’t move, but Kinjal and Pari were in immediate danger. If I’m wrong about that, sorry. I just know all the screaming and pushing of Anupamaa is disrespectful and unacceptable, and I stand behind that.

I totally agree Aadya's behavior is unacceptable. No matter what Anupama did, Aadya cannot push elders, badmouth her adoptive mother, and try to hurt her mom by forcing her dad to marry someone he doesn't love. The adopted child is being shown in very bad light. Some viewers who are not wise enough will think adopted children are not good for a family's well-being.

If Aadya's insecurities are not corrected, she will do the same to Shruti. What if Shru becomes her dad's wife and gives birth to a child? That baby will be much much younger and hence, both Shruti and Anuj may prioritise the baby. In that case, will Aadya start hating them too? 

Both Anupama and Anuj are responsible for this mess. The former left CA without clarifying her stance, while the latter allowed the hatred to breed to this extent! 

I think we agree here-  Anuj should have gotten CA help right away and should have cleared Aadhyas misconceptions.

But he didn’t. And now 5 years later - instead of trying to talk to her to get the help- he simply commanded her to respect Anupama because “She’s your mom”.  

Anuj could still - try- even now—to approach this in a way to heal them-  both of them are clearly hurt from Anupama - but to just shut CA down and say she has to be respectful-  because she’s her mom- that was what was so wrong on his part.  

Originally posted by: LoLo

She is acting like a brat here, arguing with her father and in the street. Anupamaa has her issues, but she walked away 5 years ago for a reason. To let hatred for your mother grow and foster in your child’s heart is poor parenting. Choti Anu was manipulated into believing something that wasn’t true. She’s held onto that misconception for years and it’s burned in her heart. Why not get her help? Why not call Anupamaa and demand an answer? No let’s change your name and let you grow up disrespectful and hateful; that’s much better!

How was is not true? Are we watching the same show? There was ZERO misconception. Anupama abandoned her again and again and again for Shahs, throughout the 2-3 years she had CA. 

Are people not watching the show at all and just making stuff up?

I will repeat there was ZERO misconception, Anupama chose Shahs EVERY time over her adopted daughter. 

To hate someone who abandoned her as a kid is not being a brat, it's a natural thing. What reason did anupmaa have for walking away? Because she is a selfish vile woman who abandoned a child she adopted and ran away like a coward?

There is a lot of attempt recently at revisionist history, but viewers don't have such short term memories. There was no misconception or misunderstanding, Anupama always chose Shahs over her daughter and then like an evil coward left her and ran away for 5 years.