DARK KNIGHT- A SwaSan FF-T3-DELETED- AN-PG 1

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tootiefrootie11

@tootiefrootie11

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#81

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum
<font size="2">Un Res on Page 3, Shru darling.

Looong eassay, I'm afraid. Poor you! 🤗

</font>

Loved reading it, made my morning after the awful few days you know about so I'll be re reading and replying when I have time to do a justifiable response! Love you xoxo

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tootiefrootie11

@tootiefrootie11

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#82

Dear friends

I am very conscious that I have a number of reverts pending. Please continue to bear with- my week has been rather stressful and continues that way. Usually I update Friday's but today that won't be possible. I will be working on chapter 18 tomorrow and will also try to respond if time permits but in be meantime, loving all the replies and have read each one with great pleasure and thankfulness!

Love,
Shru X

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Nalini Ansh

@Bennet.Lizzy

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#83

hey shruthi

when are you planning for the next update ?

you wont believe it but the first thing i do every morning right from the bed is check for a pm on dark knight. if i find one i wont get up from my bed till i read it through.

please update the next part for poor souls like me. ASAP

love
N

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tootiefrootie11

@tootiefrootie11

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#84

Originally posted by: bennetlizzy
hey shruthi

when are you planning for the next update ?

you wont believe it but the first thing i do every morning right from the bed is check for a pm on dark knight. if i find one i wont get up from my bed till i read it through.

please update the next part for poor souls like me. ASAP

love
N

Hey Nalini!

Awww, that really made me feel so good! Well it's a Saturday and I got back at 11.30pm from work yesterday and now it's 6.40am and I've woken to write 18 for you all:). It should get done today, each chapter takes me 7 hours or so (I know!!) so I'll post it as soon as I furiously finish writing:) and will hope it doesn't disappoint you special people!

Also I read Milan and will drop you a proper comment after I finish 18 but really liked it:).
Lots of love xoxo

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naina

@hp_2006

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#85

Shruti dear 🤗

First of all I am really sorry for my late comments..😊 I am going to comment for your last three chapters 15, 16 and 17...All three were amazing..😃

Poor Swara felt really sad while leaving that haveli na..So many memories she is taking back from there..
And then our brave and chivalrous Sanskaar..He just couldn't keep himself away from helping that innocent man..😳 And he submitted himself to get flogged for rescuing him..His character is pure gold, I must say.. But he gave it back to the man who hit him, by means of the challenge he posed before receiving those 5 whiplashes.👏I am in awe of his pure mettle..😃😃

But then when their leader arrived, I had expected it to be Adarsh, Lakshya or Pawan..😲 But he turned out to be Devendra..hmm..that was an interesting stroke..I was literally fearful when Swara had to mount his horse, poor Sanskaar..he was took along for questioning like a thief..😭 and all he could think about was about his Swara..

By the way when are you planning for the entry of this Pawan..😉 It has reached chapter 17 and there is still no sign of him..😛 I don't believe that something had happened to him, like Sanskaar did..😆 I know that you are actually planning a real surprise for us😳 hain na Shru😊😊

Ok..and coming to the chapter 17..Oh my god..!! that was so real..I was wondering how Swara is going to escape from that beast.. and poor Sanskaar, his plight was unbearable ..And thank god, there were those weapons in that room..otherwise I can't even think about what would have happened to Swara..😲😲

And now I have no fear at all..I am really sure that Sanskaar can make it..because he is filled with such intense sense of revenge against those scoundrels..I am awaiting the massive bloodshed which is bound to happen😆 I am not being cruel you know..😉

Such a wonderful story this is yaar Shru...Love you for this..🤗

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tootiefrootie11

@tootiefrootie11

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#86

Dearest Friends,

Chapter 18 has just been posted. I will start to seriously work through outstanding replies to 17 but I hope you will like 18 and as ever, be kind enough to share feedback.

I am also extremely tired and sleepy so might be a bit of time lag between replies! Please do forgive me.

Lots of love to you all,

Shru xoxo

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#87

Res 😊

Un-Res

Shru, my dear...On reading each succeeding chapter of DK, each a remarkable work of creative excellence, I am reminded of quotes by James C Collins. Its from his book called "Good to Great: Why some Companies make the Leap and Others don't". 😊 Not exactly related to writing as such, but its the message which I found so apt for your sheer passion and intensity.

"Good is the enemy of great. And that is one of the key reasons why we have so little that becomes great..."

""When [what you are deeply passionate about, what you can be... your best at] come together, not only does your work move toward greatness, but so does your life. For, in the end, it is impossible to have a great life unless it is a meaningful life. And it is very difficult to have a meaningful life without meaningful work. Perhaps, then, you might gain that rare tranquility that comes from knowing that you've had a hand in creating something of intrinsic excellence that makes a contribution."

🤗 🤗

I don't want to sound like a certifying authority 😆 😆, but for what my humble opinion is worth, DK has transcended that elusive line which separates a great piece of writing from the very good. You know how fond I was of your "Trial By Fire" and "Restored by Grace"--both really excellent works by themselves. But DK, in my humble opinion has transcended those. Truly your magnum opus. I've told you this in our scrap exchange, please do try working your script on this, the one you said you were writing with a friend. It would translate marvelously to a visual medium, and I would be so proud of seeing your creative talent on TV one day, and saying with a wide grin on my face---"I read this script when the writer, my pal Shru, wrote this on Swaragini forum"! 🤗🤗

Coming to the update itself, hats off, kudos and a standing ovation 👏 👏 👏 for the sheer raw power, intensity you have put all through Part 1. So much of dramatic tension and knife edge action, and the stellar part, was of course, the primal, atavistic, elemental fury with which Prince Sanskaar gives battle. He was always a superbly skilled and efficient warrior, battling with clinical expertise. But now, while he erects a defensive barrier of sorts with the table and furniture at hand, ensuring he and Swara have a modicum of protection from oncoming horde, it is he himself who becomes the most massive defense/ barrier of all, protecting Swara. 😊 Far from being just an expert/ skilled wielder of a weapon, he becomes the weapon himself...

That portrayal of his cleansing rage, his bellowing battle calls, the unleashing of the caged beast within him, all in response to the threat and assault his love, his very soul, his other half had faced---was splendid. I have no other words for it. I am not attributing any Divine aura to Prince Sanskaar---that would be too melodramatic if I said so---but I was reminded of those magnificent, timeless, awe inspiring verses from the Bhagawad Gita:

"Yada yada hi Dharmasya glanirbhavati bharata,
Abhyutthanam dharmasya tadatmanam srijamyaham.

Paritranaya sadhunam vinashaya cha dushkritam,
Dharma sansthapnarthaya sambhmami yuge yuge"

Whilst I am not saying the portrayal carried the sense of a Divine being, it was awe inspiring in the vision of an avenging angel, a brilliant, driven, flawed human summoning near superhuman powers, a righteous fury, from a wellspring deep within himself. What better occasion to find that lodestone of raw power than this one--when his very soul, spirited and courageous though she was, was being cruelly and horrifyingly assaulted.

I am so glad you brought in Pawan and a small, courageous band of Sanskaar's loyal warriors to assist him in the end. That gave a touch of reality to the whole scene as well---wonderful as it was to see Sanskaar wreak a rightesous havoc on those mercenaries, after a point he would have been set upon by the far more numerous horde, had he not had some support.

The warm, brotherly rapport between Sanskaar and Pawan, reminded me of Legolas and Gimli from LOTR. 😊 In terms of talk of respective enemy kill totals, not leaving enough mercenaries for Pawan to deal with! I loved it, you know what a massive LOTR and Hobbit nut I am! And I liked how you drew a subtle distinction between the comrades and brothers-at-arms: Pawan, exuding a steadfast, capable and skilled aura, as opposed to the sheer charisma and brilliance of Sanskaar.

I liked how Pawan immediately gauged what Swara meant to Sanskaar. That look of fierce, single minded adoration and concern he lavished on her was one thing, which Pawan also linked with the no holds barred fury with which Sanskaar had slain the mercenaries, and tried his best to slay Devendra too. It was obvious to Pawan, seeing Swara's state, what had motivated Sanskaar to such white hot rage. And I loved that touch of Pawan immediately lowering his gaze, not wanting Swara to feel his concerned stare in her present condition of abject fear and anguish at the grievous attack she had courageously borne and fought against.

I wanted to say here, Shru, how I loved that you have not made Swara to be just a shrinking violet, a damsel in distress. Despite facing such a brutal, soul sickening assault, she held herself together somehow, trying to buy some time for Sanskaar, to somehow get a chance for him to get free. And despite her sheer terror, her pain at Devendra's sickening attack, she kept her wits together, drawing strength from gazing at Sanskaar, and from her own reserves of will deep within her. That kick to Devendra's groin and the slash of the dagger across his face from the previous chapter, still stayed with me throughout this one, I was so thrilled about that! And earlier too, in Samkalgoonj, she showed such courage and pluck in stabbing that bandit.

But still, that sickening assault from Devendra she has undergone, would inevitably leave her with an immense sense of shock, a post traumatic stress reaction of sorts. And that portrayal was so gut wrenchingly, agonizingly wonderful. When Sanskaar begins to race after Devendra, instructing Pawan to guard Swara with his very life; that elemental cry of Swara's, calling for the man who is literally everything to her...that soul keening call to her knight literally made my hair stand on end, my skin break out in goosebumps.

And that is when Pawan again realizes what Swara has come to mean to Sanskaar. A man who would never otherwise abandon a battle mission or objective, was now single mindedly focused on ensuring the safety and well being of Swara.

So Devendra slunk away like a craven hyena/ jackal. 🤢 😡 What a caliber of a man he is (abysmally low!!) to be able to only inflict pain on persons bound or otherwise coerced/ blackmailed into suffering his vile, evil assaults. Not a man who can be expected to give any valorous/ heroic battle! What a spineless, gutless rogue! So he lives, for Prince Sanskaar to battle and slay another day---I can't wait for that day though, and I do hope Swara will have her opportunity to do her share of bodily harm on that waste of life and space!! It was fabulous how Bagri was slain! That vile, obnoxious toad!! I was literally clapping and cheering when he collapsed, Pawan having finished him off with Sanskaar's sword.

The climax of Part 1 was wonderful too, the way Sanskaar carries his Princess outside, holding her close in the protective circle of his arms. He is awe struck by the sheer courage shown by her, isn't he...and he has freely accepted to himself now, the intense and pure love he feels for her. His urge is now just to heal her, succor her...and I do hope he realizes that what she needs is his love, in turn. That bit before they exit the tent, of Swara finding her sanctuary in the steel bands of his arms around her, the comforting solid bulk of his chest on which she rested her head, was 😳 , despite the far from ideal circumstances they found themselves in. But they have each other na? That is something---in fact, that's everything to them...and now I am so consumed with nervousness, wondering when that sly vixen (kavita) would make a re entry!

I also loved how Sanskaar called out stridently for a voluminous cloak to be brought, so that he could wrap Swara in it, give her that comfort of her wounds inflicted by that vile beast being hidden---though his men were all trustworthy and honorable, he understood what it would have meant to Swara, she would have felt exposed and vulnerable, having the memory of that brutality being open.

Part 2: I found the entire dynamic within the Gadodia family very, very tantalizing, Shru. Shekar, while not being as spineless, brainless and gutless as in the serial; is skating pretty close to being a father with no perspective and sense of responsibility.

Swara has suddenly become "your daughter", when he speaks to Shomi, not "our daughter". 🤢 😡 And "Mishti" becomes "Sharmishta"! And worst of all, now he suddenly starts feeling "guilt", for his love for Shomi, starts feeling that he betrayed Janaki! Arre wah!! What do you say for men who have late flashes of what they pretend to be "conscience"?

I just hated the way he flung that diatribe about how he regretted having made both his daughters equal inheritors of the family wealth and properties. He has revealed himself to be almost as narrow minded as his mother, who wanted only a small stiped to be paid over to Swara, and the bulk of the estate for Ragini. Shekar felt bad about that, well, that was good, I guess. And he used Janaki's help to intercede about this codicil, and get both his daughters as equal inheritors. But now to fling that at Shomi's face, say that he regretted it, felt that he had been unfair to Janaki and Ragini, was so despicable!! 🤢 😡

Ragini is feeling the pangs of conscience---a realistic and layered portrayal. Victory has turned bitter in her mouth, hasn't it---seeing the cataclysmic impact on her own family---on her beloved choti ma, as well as in the way her father and mother have reacted. Plus, despite all the happiness she feels at being Lakshya's wife, the status that this bond brings, the physical intimacy she has attained with him; I think she is very conscious of the fact that he doesn't really love her, and only respects her for traits he imagines she possesses, which are all a giant lie! Not a comfortable position to be in, at all...

Janaki seems to genuinely love Swara, and want her back, and is urging Shekar to realize that it is his daughter, his wife he is talking about. She does seem, in her way, every bit as formidable a lady as Annapurna, and as conscious of the importance of family bonds. Like she says, Ragini was just as much Sharmishta's; as Swara was hers! They were all a family, and it pains her to see how her husband is now vaingloriously retracting on his emotions and commitments.

I do wonder, Shru, who the person was, though, who saw that interaction between Ragini and SwaSan, before Sanskaar left the palace? I used to think it was Annapurna; but then discarded that idea. I did think in this chapter, that it might be Janaki? But then, her concealing this, and showing so much concern otherwise for Swara, would make her out to be truly diabolical. Much in the mold of what Ragini did! Is this the portrayal you have in mind? I can't wait to see when you reveal this mystery!!

Lots of Love,

----Viji

Edited by CogitoErgoSum - 9 years ago

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Vini224

@Vini224

Inactive

Posted: 9 years ago

#88

Hey Shruti

This was such an action packed chapter.

Was waiting with glee to see Devendra being ripped apart by Sanskar but then he escaped.

I suppose him being the main villain he needs to be alive a little longer.

The way Sanskar decimated the soldiers was amazing.His whole priority being the safety of his Swara.

Was feeling bad with Swasan facing all the troubles alone but the appearance of Pawan at the right time has made everything better.Atleast now they have someone on their side.

Pawan seems to have already realized what Swara means to Sanskar.

Eagerly waiting for the next chapter to see Sanskar tending to Swara.

I'm sure it's going to be amazing just like the chapter where Swara tended to Sanskar's wounds after the bandits attack.

Please update soon.Just can't wait to read the next chapter.

Edited by Vini224 - 9 years ago

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The.Lannister

@The.Lannister

Stunner

+ 7

Posted: 9 years ago

#89

Res ❤️ + WA heart eyes for u know what! 🤣

Chapter 18:

So dev escaped😡 But then such men dont die that easily. And anyways why waste such an intelligent villain so early in the series😳 He is a wounded beast now, and not just physically, his ego has been shredded...that too by a girl😈 let's see how he strikes back. Sanskaar's single handed battle against Dev's men was extremely well written. The blood, the gore, men dying like flies, Sanskaar's sword cutting through each new lot of soldiers all was brilliantly captured 👏 Even in all this Swara is topmost in his mind. He ensures she is protected before stepping out of his self made defensive wall to tackle Dev's men. Good thinking there with him using the table as a defense barrier Shru👏 It goes on to show how truly "skilled" Dev is, that once Sanskaar is free & he is down with what should ideally be nothing more than a cut for a "warrior" he cannot even get up. He is lying there half dead. I wonder if it was only the bleeding wound or seeing Sanskaar's rudra roop made him sit there paralyzed in fear😆

Pawan is here!!! You made me wait for him for 17 chapters you cruel girl😡 but wow what an entry I love men with curls and with a healthy sense of humour and who are loyal to the end and who are perceptive and hence Pawan is just perfect on all counts and he is all MINE!

Even when Swara's strength is finally giving in she is still thinking of Sanskaar. Only him. That complete absorption of hers in him even at such a moment & after so much proves how much he has become a part of her very soul.

That SANSKAAR which she uttered was heartrending 😭 It was a silent plea to not leave her alone with a complete stranger no matter how trustworthy😭 She wants just Sanskaar to be with her atm, no one else will do😭 She is really such a little baby here that you automatically feel protective towards her The way she holds on to Sanskaar, the way she panics when he puts her down to drape that cloak around her...

Ah horsie is safe😳 and so is Swara now! Nicely bundled up & with Sanskaar😳

Pawan killed Bagri 👏 Excellent👏

And so while here Swara is being so brave in spite of the circumstances there her father is labeling her a traitor I do understand where Shekhar is coming from. To be fair he didn't believe the charges against her immediately & did try to find her so she could be proven innocent. But everything seems be going against her & the society then was too very harsh to the families of traitors, especially if she is a girl. Though that didn't stop me from wanting to scream at the injustice of it all as Shekhar in the end decided to award the culprit 😵

Edited by The.Lannister - 9 years ago

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Mallika-E-Zain

@Mallika-E-Zain

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#90

Res

Unres-

Sheesh Shruti!! I know I've broken all records of late unres and trust me I'm really apologetic. But the net wouldn't work properly only!! So sorry sweetheart and today that its working I've got end no. of posts to unres. So starting with you for chapter 18-

PART 1-

Sanskaar alone fought the men just like a Knight in a shining armour. He wouldn't let those men even come near his Swara. He was alone yet he was capable and strong enough to protect his lady love and also fight all the statue men out there!! Huh.. And that brute!! That filthy treacherous cheap wild animal. HE ESCAPED!! Ugh... Shru, please do me a favour. Sanskaar HAS TO KILL THIS VILE MAN. PLEASE!! And the death should be as painful as the punishment received by Prometheus, and he should DIE by Sanskaar's hands only.

Shruti, THATS NOT FAIR!! You let Bagri being killed by Pawan. I so wanted Sanskaar to KILL him. That man without a heart, that wretch, that RAKSHAS, he used to whip him day and night and Sanskaar couldn't kill him!!! That's injustice!!

Oh my! Swara was so broken. So hurt and shocked just as if its the dooms day for her and she's already lifeless. And then Sanskaar ran towards her for support. That Devendra!! I wanna say so much shit about him but this is a public forum not to forget!! Poor Shona.. which takes me to the next part again infuriating me.

PART 2-

Shekhar!!! This kalank on the name of a father. Oh God. Shru this chapter again got me swearing hard. But thank God there weren't any city buses here. Janaki is such an amazing character. She has such a royal aura and a feel of superiority that won't allow any wrong or stupid discussions around her. Just like Annapurna. These two ladies are too good. And both care for SwaSan so much.

So now, there has been injustice with Janaki uh? Such a fickle minded man, who is totally outta his senses. Bl***y idiot. Janaki is such a sweet lady with a golden heart. Totally Swara's Maa. And Shekhar ji is just as pathetic as Lux ji as he is only apnaoing Ragini.
Anyways again Apologies for the late unres.
Will be waiting for chapter 19
Love ya
Sakshi

P.S.- Thanks for the dedication Shruti *overwhelmed*

Edited by MusicAddict - 9 years ago

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