Despatches Series Part 6-OS - Letter from Sanskaar to Swara

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#11

Very powerfully articulated Shru...😊 as usual from you! 😊

You brought out the angst and frustrated pain of Sanskaar so well---he would prefer, perhaps, to not feel for Swara this intensely, but he really can't help himself, can he?

Some nuggets of gold which really appealed to me 😊:

""The letters that label my calendar years are BK and AS, rather than BC and AD- Before Kavita and After Swara.""

The above sentence was just Awesome!

The following paras brought tears to my eyes, Shru...really.

""You see Swara, I cannot let you go. No matter how much I want to and I do want to, as this unrequited love for you is like slow poison seeping through me drop by drop, each day. But, it is beyond that. You are as essential to me as breathing. It transcends having you physically present with me, although the torment of not having you there is excruciating, but I mean that you are now part of my very being. Separating you would be akin to tearing my own heart out; I could not survive it.""

"""I pray that I am strong enough to withstand what awaits me. The agony of being around you without being able to hold you like I want to, kiss you senseless, make you my wife in every sense of the word, will be agonising. The pain of knowing you do not, will not, return my love will dance an endless waltz with the pleasure of having you with me, being able to see your face first thing when I wake and the last thing before I sleep, of being able to talk to you, make you laugh and dry your tears and simply just be there for you. I just wish you would open your eyes and really see- see the possibilities we have, the chance to make our little heaven for ourselves, but fortune does not always favour all those who dream of it. Yet, I cling on- to the vestiges of a frail hope that took root when you asked not to get divorced."""

Such a deep, powerful love. Sigh...when will Swara realize? 😕

I am now confused which is my favorite letter---the one to RP or this one! I've decided that the letter to DP comes a close second.

Anyway...I will be traveling the coming week on work, for a conference. My responses are likely to be delayed, don't mind, please. 😊 Do keep those updates & PMs coming!

Is there another letter coming up? You were thinking about one to Ragini?

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DarkPhoenix93

@DarkPhoenix93

Rocker

Posted: 9 years ago

#12

Beautiful update. I felt so mushy while reading about Sanskaar's all consuming love for Swara. I liked how he is feeling hopeful regarding Swara because unknowingly Swara has started exercising her (?) rights on him. Hopefully this is enough for him to try to woo Swara. Loved this OS and am looking forward to the next one.

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The.Lannister

@The.Lannister

Stunner

+ 7

Posted: 9 years ago

#13

What a great way to start a letter! No salutation. That missing word in itself speaks volumes.

I am glad Swara will never get to read this letter. IMO she has done nothing to deserve to know all this. I find her shallow and think such a depth in emotions and understanding will be beyond her comprehension.

I loved the BK and AS thing. Love truly does divide your life into such parts.

While I will always dislike Sanskaar being a puppet in Swara's hands I like his reason for staying. To protect her from lux n ragini especially since she doesn't even realize that she needs to be protected. That is the problem with true love, you cannot abandon them in their time of need no matter how much they deserve it and how much you need it.

Lovely work Shruti 🤗

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manasi

@manasie23

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#14

Beautiful, Beautiful, Beautiful... That is the only word running through my mind while reading this One Shot... I'd actually ask you 'Are you sanskaar by any chance' though I know you aren't.👏
While reading this I felt that I am actually reading Sanskaar's pov rather than your opinion of Sanskaar's feelings 😳
I actually felt this is what exactly he must be feeling.
He is not angry at Swara for using him he is infact wanting to help her. He is not mahaan like her and believes in realism but when things come to her all his realism turns to dust
Hats off to you Shruti *Takes a Bow* because this one is a brilliant masterpiece 😳

Edited by manasie23 - 9 years ago

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Zaalima_5

@Zaalima_5

Sparkler

Posted: 9 years ago

#15

wow amazing work shruti..👏
sorry replying late. actually i read this in morning 5 o clk itself but when i finished,i was getting late for for namaz. so just clicked like button.
okay loved this letter as usual.it is clearly visible how much you understand and admire sanskaar's char of this show..😳he is so helpless in swara's love. his complaints to swara r right. she mentioned ragya's marrg as destiny then why can't she look at their marrg in same way..😭😡 aakhri bhudhu..
loved AK and AS...😆 two personality of sanskaar's...!
currently the situations r messed up. so much complications ke kaun kiss se payar karta hai aur kaun kiss se nahi as you said in your letter, i read it twice to understand..😆
I know I cannot make you love me, just as I know you cannot make Lucky love Ragini, in as much as she could not make him love her, or stop him loving you.

waiting for your next letter...😊 next one is to ragini right??😳

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Krishna

@kubare

Sparkler

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#16

Shruti...once again an awesome mind blowing letter dear...So Swara gets it before Shumi or Rags...😆

OK lets get started on what I love the most...you just got me chuckling with your first para itself...

I know I haven't used a salutation before your name. After all, what can I say that will not spark off immediate protest from you? Dearest seems quite banal when talking about you, although it does apply. If I use beloved, you will get angry, and I have had enough of accusations. Any other words I want to use, will meet the same fate, so best to simply leave it.

This this this... was just perfect...had me nodding and chuckling loudly...as its so True to them nah and I could so see his expressions and hers too...just goes to show how brilliantly you have got their characters...personalities...👏😆 Sanskara more so with each and every letter...Your love fro him is clearly shown to us ...

Why am I writing to you? You won't get to read this anyway- but write it I must. Sounds stupid? Ah well, that's me when it comes to you. See, you have thwarted me yet again. Yes, thwarted! I was all set on a course of action. I was leaving - the recent drama culminating in our families discussing our divorce, as if talking about the state of Kolkata's roads, was too much, even for me. So I decided to take off for a while, leaving letters for the chosen few in our family. Yes, I said "our"- it is how I think of us, even if you don't.

Uff no high lighters available ...so underlines and made old the parts that were just wow...Thwarted indeed...that he was...Their Divorce compared to Kolkata's Roads...😆 It has nah...😆😆😆

OK ...the next para that I loved loved love was hm questioning her selflessness...

She is nah...a Saint...one who thinks and worries about everyone but oneself...

No- your psyche is a lot more complex than that. You are a genuine oddity Swara.( A Saint)

You have elevated the needs of those you love to a pedestal so high, that even if you were to spend an eternity worshiping at that altar, it would be to no avail. For you see, those Gods are too caught up themselves to listen to a supplicant like yourself. I know you don't want to hear this, won't like to hear it- but that may be precisely why you need to. I know your family loves you too, each in their own way and in varying degrees, but they are all still living their own lives, one way or other. Even flawed tragic Ragini lives- she may live in a strange way, but she does transcend mindless existence. But you Swara- what about you? When do you think about what you want from your life, for yourself?

@Bold...this this this...I can so see ...hear Sanskar giving this talk ...lecture...to her someday...and her getting it...maybe...😆😆😆Anger would be her first reaction for sure...😆😆😆 and telling off Sanskar naturally...😆

Thinking like that is not called being selfish, it is merely self-preservation or call it survival, if you will. A concept I know you really struggle with.

So True !

In the same para you have descried Sanskar and Swara Perfectly...one is a Realist...and the other a Idealist...a family oriented Romantic one at that..

He thinks with his Head..and she only her heart...He sees the world around him with clear glasses and she with Rose tinted ones...

Oh and loved your reference of Asoka with Kallinga...very fitting an apt...

Why else would you have decided to now plunge us into "Mission Reconcile Lakshya-Ragini"? Did we not learn our lesson as to how meddling in others' lives is fraught with a million complications we should not be courting?

She didn't nah and now shes trying to rectify what all went wrong and what she did not take into consideration when she was in the mode of Mission: Unite Maa Baba..

Thus her getting directly into the New Mission: Unite Laksh Ragini...😆😆😆

Nothing I say will shift you from the course of action you have deemed necessary and we both know that without me, you cannot chart the road ahead. You are no strategist, and no matter how expert a warrior Arjuna was, without his charioteer, the course of Kurukshetra could not be navigated successfully. Hence, I have to walk that path with you and I do so, as I have little choice.

Yes he's her Krishna to her being Arjun...he was the guiding light and the strength and moral support she needed and could have not done without in her first mission and once again here he is and what I love is how easily she thinks of him being there for her...to support her in her endeavors...no matter what...and still Swara is clueless as to why she does it...😆😆😆 The faith that she has on him...uff...

Oh and this had me laughing my head off...because I love giving such abbreviations to events too...

The letters that label my calendar years are BK and AS, rather than BC and AD-

Perfect indeed...😆

I know I affect you. If I did not, you would never take the liberties you take with me. How can the Swara who is almost non-existent when it comes to others' wants and wishes, unilaterally decide to sacrifice mine and expect involvement from me each time? I told you yesterday that you had the right to behave as you did with me- the fact that you exercised that right actually speaks volumes to me.

Yes Yes Yes...This This This... She trust him...has complete faith in him and she just does not realise why so...

This para said it all that led to Sanskar asking her if she will ever take Laksh back...This gave him immense hope...of Them being possible...

Oh, I know you are entirely oblivious to what you have done and unknowingly indicated in so doing. If I told you, by word or action, you would run faster than I could say "Lucky" (pun intended), which is why I simply smiled and overrode your constantly prickly conscience, which finally flared up on my behalf too. Did you think I was blind to the irony of you saying that some relationships are pre-destined and God himself sets their paths in motion? How you have such belief in that for Lakshya and Ragini, but totally fail to apply the glaringly obvious analogy to us, is all part of your utter incognisance about your own feelings and your destiny. Staggering really, but not when one comes to know you as I have done. Only you Swara, could state that as Lakshya and Ragini's marriage could not be prevented despite all our efforts, it has to be fated, and not connect this to another marriage that also happened, despite multiple efforts to stop it- ours! So, I did what my instinct told me to- I bound myself to you once again, for something I believe is pointless. I did this simply because it will give you happiness and my happiness is now totally parasitic on yours.

The bold and underlines pat is what I saw on Sanskar face when she was sprouting those lines to him... and in my mind too...it was like Foreshadowing...😆😆😆

I know I cannot make you love me, just as I know you cannot make Lucky love Ragini, in as much as she could not make him love her, or stop him loving you. Yet, I can stand with you and try to keep you from harm if I can. For I do not trust your sister as I have said, and if she wants to get to you again, she will have to once more go past me, and she will never find that fortress unguarded. Similarly, it seems that despite my previous deep fears, you genuinely seem to not want to rekindle your relationship with Lucky. I am sure you still love him, how much and in what way, I cannot tell at present. What is important is that you feel under threat by his persistence, and for that I need to be the shield that deflects that unwanted ardor. So be it- we all do what we must. As Aristotle said, "There is no remedy for love but to love more".

Yes hes with her as he can't stop form helping her and the most important ...he will be her shield...from any harm from Ragini or his bro...

@Bold and underlined...Loved Loved Loved...👏 Just LOVED!!!!!!!

"They say a person needs just three things to be truly happy in this world: someone to love, something to do, and something to hope for."*

In that case then, bliss is mine and I will see this through.

This This This...Just Perfect...So Him...Loved loved loved ...LOVED IT!!!!

The whole letter just Perfection and Sanskar...👏⭐️👏

Till the next one then...😃

Edited by kubare - 9 years ago

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.Sarcasmazing.

@.Sarcasmazing.

Dazzler

+ 6

Posted: 9 years ago

#17

So finally the most awaited letter is here- Sanskaar to Swara & as expected from you Shru- Absolutely brilliant! It's just spectacular, like I had expected ⭐️

Okay sabse pehle, I love that bit about Sanskaar not using any salutation for Swara despite his heart probably overflowing with the most endearing titles for her. You see Swara, what you have done to this guy with your constant rebuffing & accusations showered upon him? I hope this stops now that she has apologized for hurting him in the quest for her stupid missions 😆

I was reading this in Sanskaar's voice, like this literally felt like Sanskaar speaking & reading it out. You really understand Sanskaar's POV & his unspoken feelings for everyone re. Such good grasp you have over him, it's unbelievable. I am so glad you are a Sanskaar fan Shru cos it's a delight to have his thought articulated by you in such amazing manner 😳

My absolute favorite bits are:

The Ours v/s Yours debate: Absolutely mind-blowing! This bit I am sure would stung Swara in a brutal honest manner if she ever were to read this.

BK & AS analogy: Oh dear, this just DEFINES Sanskaar. What he was Before Kavita & What he has become After Swara. These two different Sanskaar's, both of them in love but in varying degrees. Love as an emotion has always ruled Sanskaar, hasn't it? This needs to be read by those thick headed people too who "THINK" that Sanskaar fell for Swara in few minutes & forgot Kavita instantly. Errr no, it took him bloody 5 years of trauma to overcome Kavita's death & that growing feelings for Swara were there from the beginning itself, even when he was out to harm her but the feeling of revenge was much stronger for him at that particular point. No wonder the guy was on his way towards light & redemption as soon as he heard it from Swara itself. It wasn't sudden but very gradual IMO.

Idealist v/s Realist: Swara's utopia where everything & everyone is perfect and Sanskaar's real world solutions. Enough said.

Swara exercising her right over him & their marriage being pre-destined: Even you felt so? Thank god, I thought I was the only one grinning at the irony of her saying some relationships are just fated & no obstacle can stop them from culmination. I was like, Lady just pause for a minute & please realize what you just said cos more than RagYa, it bloody applies to YOU & YOUR marriage with Sanskaar! Even Sanskaar caught the hiddem symbolism in her words I think 😆 & Swara SO behaves like she has full rights over him. You should have included those moments where she was more disappointed in Sanskaar than Lux when Devar Ji had proposed to him. Boy, was she behaving like the typical wife there ;)

I pray that I am strong enough to withstand what awaits me. The agony of being around you without being able to hold you like I want to, kiss you senseless, make you my wife in every sense of the word, will be agonising. The pain of knowing you do not, will not, return my love will dance an endless waltz with the pleasure of having you with me, being able to see your face first thing when I wake and the last thing before I sleep, of being able to talk to you, make you laugh and dry your tears and simply just be there for you. I just wish you would open your eyes and really see- see the possibilities we have, the chance to make our little heaven for ourselves, but fortune does not always favour all those who dream of it. Yet, I cling on- to the vestiges of a frail hope that took root when you asked not to get divorced. Oh, I know why you did that, I have more than delved into that above, but I heard something on radio the other day that has stayed with me:

^^ This part OMG. I have no words to describe. It just shows the depth of love this guy feels for her, it is SO heartwrenching. Can someone be so much in love? I have a lump in my throat here ❤️

This was absolutely mesmerizing Shru 🤗 Damn I am your fangirl for life now, such finesse in writing ❤️ You are AWESOME! 🤗

Can I request for a response letter this time from Swara to Sanskaar? Don't write it now ofcourse. After Swara starts feeling something for him, hopefully Karwachauth itself :P I know you'll just kill it. Pretty please? 😳

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Purbi

@Purbishona

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#18

Its so beautiful Shruti.. Simply heart touching.. I was eagerly waiting for this letter.. Loved the Ashoka and Phoenix part.. So, realistic.. The division of his life BK and AS is so true.. The lines "There is no remedy for love but to love more", it is one of my favourite lines.. Your last quote is seriously just like written for Sanskaar.. I loved each and every part of this letter.. And one thing I want to say that from Sanskaar I learnt that what love actually is, true definition of love..

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Sakura24

@Sakura24

Rocker

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#19

God...god...OMG!!!

Shruti dearest this is the best you have written yet. Now it seems as if really Sanskar is writing through you. This is exactly what he would say if he had a chance to get all his feelings out without being interrupted by his ever misunderstanding lady love. Good job, I love it!!

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piccola1

@piccola1

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#20

This was simply outstanding Shruti ! And such a well written, heartfelt ode to true love..I think you wrote thi straight from your heart which is why our hearts are overwhelmed reading it ⭐️

You have depicted Sanskaar's pain and frustration superbly and along with it, his unending patience, his deep understanding and his infinite love for Swara, so very beautifully. (If our Cvs and Varun were to read this, surely, it would be irresistible to them too?..I wish !😳)

Wish Swara could read this and realize what love actually means...and learn that the deep regard and respect and total trust she has for Sanskaar are the building blocks of a love that she doesnt even have an inkling of yet.

A true materpiece of a letter..Shruti and I want to thank you for this treat of despatches..each has been superlative, carrying in their flow, the ebb and tide of Sanskaar's emotions...

Btw was listening to Hemant Da's immortal rendering of "Jaane Wo Kaise Log The Jinke Pyaar Ko Pyaar Mila" while typing this and couldnt but think it is a most apt song for Sanskaar at this moment !

P.S. : Would love to see you capture Swaraa's response to this..or a Diary update of hers that will help us understand the confusion that is Swaraa !