SwaSan OS- 'Space'

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#11

Originally posted by: Banjaaran...
Awww..

such a beautiful beautiful story..

well Hi!😳..

been reading your amazing creations albeit silently (does 'liking' counts?) but with immense happiness..
but this piece compelled me to comment.

after Sanskaar DP gotta be my favourite man.. how could i stop myself from congratulating and thanking you girl for this amazing story written for them.. (loved the folk tale. beautiful concept there).

Beautiful concept of elements.. and each element described so perfectly.

thank you so much..
Much love..❤️

Thanks dear. I am just happy you read my works. If you press "Like" its fine. If you comment, its fine too. 😊

Glad that you liked my conceptualization of DP. He seems a very interesting character, with a lot of integrity and strength. I feel Sanskaar resembles him, in many ways.

Thanks for liking the way my "Elements" series played out. I would have loved to do "Air", but unfortunately, I planned "Air" on Lucky, and I am too irritated with the character to write that to my satisfaction now. 😊 So will have to end with this quartet.

Am starting work on a SwaSan SS, in a different genre, now.

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#12

Originally posted by: kriya3
I am not a swasan fan cz.. I havnt seen swaragini for a long time...last time I saw it was swalak..and sanskar was evil...
well coming tio the writing...

its just mindblowing...

I have read all the works u have mentioned here..

and each one was ...I am running out of adjectives..

you write so well..

your language is really matured...

what is your name btw??

Hey Kriya...Well, that's fine. I sincerely respect SwaLak fans too, though I am and will always be a die hard SwaSanian. 😊

Thanks so much for liking my writing. Your comment made me go 😳

My name is Viji.

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Aafrah Khan Ahluwalia

@Aafrah-SA

Navigator

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#13

Another dose of sheer perfection. Shelling out Durga Prasads character from instance of his forming years was outstanding, but what was mind blowing was completing the entire circle st the end where his mother smiles from the heavens because he had changed the ending after all! The way Durga prasad was etched out was so powerful and deep that there was no need of SwaSan in and around anyway, his character really for some reason gave out unshakable firmness that overpowered even Annapoornas character. Maybe that's why they were a match made in heaven?
And coming to SwaSan I personally loved Sanskar metamorphosis more than Swaras side of the story, and the ending was very sweet, I can see that it helped in coming to a culmination of the series with a perfect SwaSan ending, but the real guy in the story was Durga prasad and his emanating prowess right from childhood till he guided Sanskar.

You are a terrific writer and you understand the pulse of each character. Please do hobe this quality dear.

I myself have made a few character metas for KKB characters in a fiction called Shades of Life - I know it's not easy to weave back stories, yet my friend you have done a fantabulous job

If I may suggest, please consider writing a one shot on Durga prasad and Annapoorna's first encounter leading to marriage love and children - in your hands I know it will spell magic.

And lastly a standing ovation. For this piece - actually both - space and fire!

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Cogito_Ergo_Sum

@Cogito_Ergo_Sum

Rocker

+ 3

Posted: 9 years ago

#14

Originally posted by: aafrah
Another dose of sheer perfection. Shelling out Durga Prasads character from instance of his forming years was outstanding, but what was mind blowing was completing the entire circle st the end where his mother smiles from the heavens because he had changed the ending after all! The way Durga prasad was etched out was so powerful and deep that there was no need of SwaSan in and around anyway, his character really for some reason gave out unshakable firmness that overpowered even Annapoornas character. Maybe that's why they were a match made in heaven?
And coming to SwaSan I personally loved Sanskar metamorphosis more than Swaras side of the story, and the ending was very sweet, I can see that it helped in coming to a culmination of the series with a perfect SwaSan ending, but the real guy in the story was Durga prasad and his emanating prowess right from childhood till he guided Sanskar.

You are a terrific writer and you understand the pulse of each character. Please do hobe this quality dear.

I myself have made a few character metas for KKB characters in a fiction called Shades of Life - I know it's not easy to weave back stories, yet my friend you have done a fantabulous job

If I may suggest, please consider writing a one shot on Durga prasad and Annapoorna's first encounter leading to marriage love and children - in your hands I know it will spell magic.

And lastly a standing ovation. For this piece - actually both - space and fire!

Thanks so much, Aafrah. I really wanted to explore AP and DP's characters, and I am glad you liked "Fire" and "Space". Of course, for me SwaSan will always be so no story of mine would be complete without them. 😉

I have just about starting reading your first OS (the one with Lakshya too) and will comment on that thread.

Thanks again for reading and dropping this most detailed comment.

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inlieu

@inlieu

Stunner

+ 2

Posted: 9 years ago

#15

Beautiful! What a fabulous portrayal of DP, who happens to be one of my favorites on the show! You could not have captured the essence of his persona any better! It would really be fitting to see him proactively cut through all the hide and seek between both families and show Swara the light instead, and Sanskaar too if needed.

I have been wanting to do one of my analytical posts on DP and SwaSan but am just waiting for the next couple of episodes to see Shekhar's behavior before I go ahead. But I will say I agree that your reading of his character is pretty much in line with my thoughts.

Once again, loved it, and glad you decided to write this piece! 😃

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nimmi

@Banjaaran25

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 9 years ago

#16

Originally posted by: CogitoErgoSum

Thanks dear. I am just happy you read my works. If you press "Like" its fine. If you comment, its fine too. 😊

Glad that you liked my conceptualization of DP. He seems a very interesting character, with a lot of integrity and strength. I feel Sanskaar resembles him, in many ways.

Thanks for liking the way my "Elements" series played out. I would have loved to do "Air", but unfortunately, I planned "Air" on Lucky, and I am too irritated with the character to write that to my satisfaction now. 😊 So will have to end with this quartet.

Am starting work on a SwaSan SS, in a different genre, now.

Air on Lucky.. *shocked Muh*
Hell NO!

Sujata has more going for her than this character. i neither dislike nor hate laksh but he doesn't have the depth to merit a prime position next to titans like Sanskaar or DP..
no matter how exasperating swara could get at times.. she is a sweetheart.
AP is errmm interesting. ( i am counting for her to turn greying black soon).

Air despite it's fickleness could be a terrifying force if choose to be..
imagine Laksh as air!
so Yeah Atta girl! for dropping the plan.

i read a joke long time back..
A man rues his divorce stating.. My sun-sign element is earth, my wife's earth. No wonder together we made Mud.

i used to crack up remembering that joke.

Now Sanskaar and Swara are Earth and water.😆.

i am not discounting Cv's from making mud.. but you dear viji created a perfect sculpture out of it.

p.s Hey i clicked like on all your works that i read. commenting for the first time.😳. but wont be last.

would love to read anything and everything you pen down (err type).
Cheers!

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vaishnavi77

@vaishnavi77

Inactive

Posted: 9 years ago

#17

This was one piece that, indeed was as ethereal as the title! ⭐️
I am just in awe as to how delicately and intricately you have woven the character of DP and Swasan. The journey of being the man who he is and his mother's influence on it, now, seeing DP influencing sanskaar. Maybe that's why we aren't independently who we are but a reflection of many rays of light and colour that have passed through us.

I enjoyed many points in this making it hard for me to pick up any one.

*The story..although have heard it as a folklore from my grandmother, this was simply new and deep making m enjoy it the same way. The details of sky descending wearing a blue sherwani- such details totally makes me love your work more.
*I loved the entire part of Gauri and DP's interaction
* That line regarding how love of a mother relates to the womb and of a fathers' to the heart. Just so so so true!!!!
*DP being the true man, yearning for a daughter and swara seeming to perfectly fit that place.
*The lovely flashback of swasan. It definitely is apart.

*The entire scenario of Swara lifting her hands up and Sanskaar quoting the famous line *insert the quote* 👏 . Real life confessions are always simple yet unique devoid of any grandeur . Mere presence and their words make it grand and special.
*The beautiful lines on how space actually binds the 4 elements and relating Space to be the utmost one and metaphorically showing the true place of Love. The place it truly deserves to be.

And...My most favourite part- The ending..as always beautiful. DP had indeed changed the ending of the story😃

There couldn't have been a more apt ending to the series😊. Can an another part make me take my words back and say that, the new part was the best?😛 *please consider writing one more. 5 elements, 5 parts. Promise no more no less. I won't ask furthermore for a 6th part.

Thank you for such sublime writing. Makes one's day who reads it.👏
please keep writing more and more.

Edited by vaishnavi77 - 9 years ago

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preetywoman

@preetywoman

Navigator

Posted: 9 years ago

#18

I just didn't want this beautiful piece of wriring to end. 😭

I read the previous 3 OSs too.

You are simply awesome. 👏

Please please please continue writing more 😛

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Kamala

@Kamala05

Sparkler

+ 7

Posted: 9 years ago

#19

A beautiful work . I loved the narration from Dp's perspective.

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The.Lannister

@The.Lannister

Stunner

+ 7

Posted: 9 years ago

#20

A perfect ending to a perfect series 👏

I loved the story of the sky falling in love with the earth.

DP is one character I completely love in the show. The actor is great and the man seems to be the only sensible one in the family after sanskaar. I also for some reason see him being more of a father figure to swara than shekhar ever was or could be. So I was extra happy to see DP trying to patch up these two.

And that chandni raat mein chat pe taare ginna as you think of your love 😆 haaye but that is so romantic. And those lines from smaug ...words can sometimes kindle a passion as strong as any touch! 😳 I am sure swara is half the time seduced just by the things he says😳

Some of the descriptions of the morning and night skies was like reading an english classic 👏 you truly weave magic with your words.

How I wish we get to see ur DP - Sanskaar scene and swara missing sanskaar while she is in the Baadi on the show

Edited by The.Lannister - 9 years ago