FF: Pancham Raga; Part 2 - pg 6 - Page 2

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diksha710 thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#11
Beautiful prologue Pro! I can't even think what Krishn must be going through right now. Thanks for the PM. Looking forward to the story🤗
sambhavami thumbnail
Posted: 6 years ago
#12
@Shanaya di, Thanks for the kind words Di, really appreciate 'em! :D

@Goldie di, thank you so much hun! <3

@Manali, thanks so much hun, it really means a LOT!

@Madhuri aunty, thank you so much for wrapping the prologue in such beautiful words, I'm so grateful!

@Mahi, thanks so much hun...Godhuli is my fav time too! Stsy tuned kyun ki this time is gonna come back again and again! <3

@Meena di, thank you hun! <3

@Ramya di, I'm so glad you liked it, and yeah this tears my heart too!

@Avyakta di, I'm so happy that you found it interesting, I hope to take you farther with them words! 😳

@Diksha di, I'm really happy you liked it. Yep, Krishna must have been so much in pain! 😭
Willy_Wonka. thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#13

Beautiful ❤️
Do update soon :)
sambhavami thumbnail
Posted: 6 years ago
#14
Part 1

A few months had passed by since Radha's marriage to Prince Ayan. The Prince himself was away in doing a border duty for King Kamsa in Mathura, while Radha slowly took over most of the household duties as an ideal daughter-in-law of the family.

However, as per the tradition, new brides weren't supposed to be trusted and Ayan's younger sister Kutila made it a point to always keep an eye on her new sister-in-law. After all, who indeed bore witness to Brishbhaanu's verity when it came to the various merits of Radha that he preached before the marriage?!

----

Just before the sun touched his peak that day, Kutila came bursting into the kitchen.
Her mother, Jatila had just finished sorting the various goods that were due for the market for the week. "You girl! How dare you enter the kitchen without washing your feet?!" She screeched. Not being allowed to talk in front of her mother-in-law, Radha quietly lowered her veil and held out a pot of water for Kutila to wash.

Kutila, however was too much in a hurry to see. Sprinkling some water here and there she said, "Did you hear? They sorted out the mystery of the Mad Piper!"
"All men are mad here and most of them are pipers: which one do you mean?" She asked. Kutila looked exasperated at the ignorance of her mother, "Are you deaf, old woman?!" She shouted, irritated, "All night long he plays his damned flute! Not a drop of sleep I've had since-" she seemed to realize something, "Since, brother got married, didn't he, bhabhi?"

Radha was glad, for the first time for the heavy veil on her head. At least her whitened face didn't betray her just now; although she was afraid that even Kutila might have heard her thumping heart. "I-I don't understand." She whispered. Even her voice was hoarse! Kutila mimed her hesitation, "I don't know-ow! This Mad Piper appeared just after your marriage, he plays the same tune over and over, tell me the truth! He's your lover! Isn't he, say, he is, isn't he?!" Kutila had her against the wall. Radha frantically shook her head. Just then, Kutila's crooked face broke into a snigger. "Why there, you look like I said the truth! Well, don't be afraid, I was messing with you but if, I find even a hint any day...well you know the drill!"
Radha nodded silently and the matter ended there.

The matter ended, but the nights did not. The scorching darkness grew darker and more alluring. With each passing night Radha found it harder and harder to control herself, to block her ears and not to move.
She for one knew exactly who the Mad Piper was and to whom he owed this madness. Every now and then, she would be jerked from a stupor by a higher note and would sit up and stare at her hand- grasped tight by her sister-in-law, deep in sleep by her side. Go away, Krishna, she would say.

---

One night however, opening her eyes, Radha felt euphoric. Kutila's fingers had fallen slack around her wrist!

Tip-toeing out of the room and then the house, opening the back gate, she ran. The music of the flute showed her the path as usual and soon she stood under a giant banyan tree. Looking up, knowing from experience, she turned back and there, was Krishna, her love. "I knew you'd come." He said, beaming. Radha turned a watery smile at him. it was all she could do to keep herself from falling right into his arms. "Look," he said, with a note of urgency in his voice, "Today the elders are having an all-night meeting nearby and you should go back immediately. Meet me tomorrow at the banks of Yamuna, got it?" Radha was bewildered, bu/t she nodded. "But kanha, what about Kutila?" "Kutila?" He asked. "Oh, that is my sister-in-law. She always comes with me to ghat!" Krishna still had a question on his face so Radha obliged, "If she won't leave me alone, then how will I meet you?"
"Oh! That's it? She's your problem, not mine." He nodded with a smile and then did the unthinkable. Swooping down he pecked Radha on the cheek, and disappeared in a jiffy!

Radha stared at the empty path before her for a while before yanking down the veil to cover her face, almost as though anyone would see a mark on her cheek if they looked.

---

Radha didn't sleep at all that night. As soon as the sky cleared up, she woke up Kutila. The latter, irritated at being awoken so early, opened her mouth to snap, when Radha shushed her and whispered. "I've decided to observe a vrata today and I need to bathe! It's for the benefit of my husband." She blushed. "You're one shameless little girl." Kutila snarled, "Hasn't you mother taught you even this much?! Which good wife ever mentions her husband so directly?! You should always avoid talking of your husband, and if it is that urgent, you should use another relation of his to finish you talk." Radha nodded fast, and pointing at the window, she repeated, "I need to bathe before the sun rises!" "Oh go by yourself, now! Can't chaperone you everywhere! And yes, your mother also doen't seem to have taught you that girls from good families don't sleep with their windows open, you shameless girl!"

Radha couldn't believe her luck. For the first time since her marriage, she was alone on her way to ghat. Seeing no one around as well, she walked faster. Then, she broke into a jog. Next, throwing all caution to wind, she just ran.

Reaching the bathing ghat she was disappointed. It was as empty as ever. Then, it struck her- why would Krishna be sitting by the ladies' bathing ghat? She ran to the ghat for water-collecting. This was empty as well. Radha checked in all the nearby ghats, but to no avail. Krishna simply was nowhere.

Feeling dejected, she returned to the bathing ghat and sat on the steps, her head bowed and eyes welling.

Suddenly Krishna splashed out of the water!

Radha sprang back in momentary fear before throwing herself on him as he chuckled aloud and embraced her with love.
Edited by Radhikerani - 6 years ago
old_charm thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#15
congrats for the new story...😃
Krishnpriya thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#16
My God ! I am late again.😔
You have already reserved a spot for writing the upcoming chapter and here i am reviewing the prologue.🤔 Khair der aaye durusht aaye.😆

Pro you are such a talented little girl.⭐️👏
The prologue was simply spellbinding sissy.
Thoroughly enjoyed your beautiful write-up.😳 Those subtle literary expressions were enchanting.❤️ You are a brilliant storyteller hun !😉
I felt as if i am witnessing all the scenarios happening in front of me. You took me to your imaginary world of RadhaKrishn.❤️ Uff the story progression was so sublime & so delicate.❤️ The way you have described Radha's plight is heartpiercingly beautiful.💔❤️
The time you have chosen for Radha's marriage is just perfect !!
Godhuli sky will add a perfect backdrop to the narration of Radha's inner conundrum and Krishna's anguish to see his eternal soulmate getting entrapped into earthly norms.🥺

Eagerly waiting to read the next chapter.😳
Edited by Krishnpriya - 6 years ago
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Posted: 6 years ago
#17
RES😆
Iss baar hum sahi waqt pe review denge.🤣
sambhavami thumbnail
Posted: 6 years ago
#18
Updated. :)

@Manasi di, thank you! :D

@Salini di: Thank you so much! Your lovely analysis really means a lot!

@Suniti di: Thanks hun! <3
Mannmohanaa thumbnail
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Posted: 6 years ago
#19
Ohhooo.
I never realised I'd already ressed LOL

In that case, Unress (TBA) 🤣

...

Jatila ki Kutila 🤣
Couldnt have matched it better!

Oh my ri <3
Your writing is so soothing and BEAUTIFUL!
I love youuu!🤗

Poor Radha, amidst so many boundaries and norms.
And oh, this boy!!! Pecking kisses on cheeks?😳☺️

Natkhat on another level Kanha 😆

And I loved the description of Radha's run to the ghat 😆

And finally the hug! Awww.

Loved loved loved it Pro! Loved it so very much.
Please please continue soon 😳


MUAAHHH :*

Edited by Mishti_Dahi - 6 years ago
sambhavami thumbnail
Posted: 6 years ago
#20
^Okay? I see. 🤣

-edit-

Thanks hun...love you so much hun! <3
Edited by Radhikerani - 6 years ago

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