The first part is super fabulous, Kat!
I feel awful that I loved Redemption but didn't comment on it as much as I wanted to, so I'm here to leave comments for this short story whenever I can as compensation (sort of). I'm really looking forward to reading more of this!
*Comments in progress!*
What a way to start off the story - Yash storming into the bedroom! 😆
I really like how this begins with "the parents' perspective" on the inevitable "growing up" phase of their children's lives. I could totally see Yash overreacting and not quite knowing just how to articulate his fears, just as easily as I could visualize Aarti trying to calm Yash down while dealing with her own emotions as well. What I loved most about this first update is how easily everything conjures up mental pictures as I'm reading. Kudos to you, Kat! 😃
"I am going to beat that boy into pulp."
Arti handed him a photograph "Is this him? Why don't I paste the photo on the sandbag and you can beat it all you want".
🤣 Oh, this is such a priceless moment! Love the dialogues - just the prospect of that sandbag with a photo pasted on it made me laugh out loud when I first read this! It's so easy to imagine this scenario being acted out, complete with Aarti's serious tone and the small smile and the twinkle in her eyes that I automatically associate with Aarti's gentle teasing.
Yash stopped in his tracks and turned to look at her. She had a small smile playing on her lips as she held out the photo to him.
Sighing he sat down and pulled Arti onto his lap. Resting his head on hers, he said "Am I really over-reacting?"
"Yes", she said.
Aah, so sweet how Yash simply stops, pulls Aarti to him, and rests his head on top of hers. A moment of peaceful togetherness and support as he calms down...I love how he asks for her opinion and she is straightforward and doesn't beat around the bush...But she still knows exactly how to ease his worries a little bit while being completely honest and expressing her own feelings to him as well. The comfort that Yash and Aarti share is evident from this little moment and it's very heartwarming to see how they are dealing with this phase in their lives and supporting each other through it; even though it seems like Aarti is the one who is Yash's emotional anchor during his outbursts, that just makes everything so much more endearing!
To say that I loved the first scene with Yash and Aarti would be a major understatement. And the "alternative stress therapy" that Yash initiates is great, haha! I can see why they'd both prefer that over beating a punching bag into a pile of sand any day!
*Reserved for later comments!*
Edited by MelodiousDreams - 12 years ago
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