FIVE YEARS LATER
PART 1
PAST AND PRESENT
"AAI!!" Sachu shouted. "AAIII!!!!"
Tying her silken tresses into a loose braid, Archana came out of the bedroom into the living room, where 6 year old Sachu was standing with 3 year old Soham, frowning. They were dressed in their identical school uniforms, and had carelessly dumped their bags on the floor.
"Pick up your bags both of you," she told them. "And come for lunch!"
Sachu did not pay attention to his Aai's command. "Aai, I will not take Soham with me to school tomorrow onwards." He declared. "He troubles me way too much."
Archana shook her head. Not again, she thought. Ever since little Soham had joined school, Sachu had been given the responsibility of looking after his younger brother in the school bus, and he had one or the other complaint every day.
"What is it today?"
"Aai, he fell asleep in the school bus again!" said Sachu, pursing his lips. "I had to leave my friends and sit with him, since his head was bobbing dangerously. I thought he would almost fall down on the floor! Sleepy head!" said Sachu irritatedly.
Archana looked at Soham whose plump cheeks had a tinge of red, and sheepishness was written all over his face. He looked at his Aai helplessly, his big black eyes sparkling (with tears?).
"I- don't like.. school.." he muttered slowly.
Oh she knew that too well. He made a fuss every morning, and even though she found it easier to give in since he looked so cute like his father when he sulked, she coaxed him to go to school every day by saying that she had given him nice things in his tiffin box to eat during recess.
"Alright Sachu, we will settle it after lunch," she said, hoping that Sachu would calm down by then. "Go wash your hands now."
Sachu and Soham picked up their bags as Archana brought out the plates for lunch. She watched both the brothers as they washed their hands- Sachu turned on the tap and lifted up Soham (who couldn't reach the tap). Then he put him down and washed his own hands. Archana smiled. Anyone would be able to associate with these sibling fights- she thought. Neither could they live with each other, nor without each other, and even though she scolded the boys when they fought, she herself knew it was part of growing up. And frankly speaking, it added colour to their relationship. When she saw the brothers playing with each other, Sachu being protective of Soham, or Soham following Sachu like a shadow- it made her feel really proud of both her kids. The house echoed with their laughter and shouts, and they were a source of joy to so many people, especially after all that the Deshmukh household had undergone- Sachin's death and its implications, her and Manav's divorce, the subsequent separation, the storm their 2nd marriage had raised and so on.
She closed her eyes, then opened them again, trying to erase out those memories of the past and focus on the present. Today, the Deshmukhs were a happy lot. They were well off financially, since Manav had quit Dharmesh's factory and started his garage again with the help of Tarun- which had gone on to become a success. The Deshmukhs had reunited once Savita had accepted Shravani and Manav's decision of not to marry, given Shravani her blessings for a new life ahead, and Sachu's responsibility to Archana. And most importantly, they had got over the shadows of all that had happened in the past. Archana herself couldn't be happier. She had wonderful in laws, two naughty but absolutely adorable kids, and the most loving and perfect husband she could have ever imagined- Manav. He was a devoted father, a responsible son in law and the best friend she could have had. He had filled her life with so much happiness, she had absolutely no complaints from him.
That was, till that afternoon.
**********************************
"Come Umi!" Archana welcomed her neighbour warmly that evening. She was sitting with Sachu and supervising his homework.
Taking advantage of the situation, Sachu asked his Aai if he could go out and play. She raised her brow, but let him go. The next few sums were difficult and he would need her guidance, which she would be unable to give due to her guest. Besides, now that Soham too had woken up from his afternoon nap, he would not let them study.
"Don't climb the neighbourhood fence!" Archana called out as the boys sped off to play. Archana sat with Umi and after the initial greetings, asked her what had brought her there.
Umi blushed. "Actually, I needed some advice." She held up two saris, one red and the other blue. "I wanted to ask which one would look better on me."
"Hmm.. the blue one, I think.." said Archana.
Umi nodded. "I thought so too.. but I still wanted to wear the red one cos I thought it would suit the occasion better."
"Occasion?"
Umi giggled. "It's Valentine's Day after two days, and I found two passes in Dheeraj's trousers pocket- for candle light dinner at a rooftop restaurant. They seem to have made some special arrangements for Valentine's Day."
Archana smiled. Dheeraj was Umi's husband. They had got married just recently.
Umi could not meet Archana's eyes as she blushed. "I know it was meant to be a surprise, but now that I know about it, I feel it is better to decide what to wear and then go.. after all, if he is making such efforts for me, I too should dress up for him, what say? Also, red is Dheeraj's favourite colour."
"I agree, you should definitely wear red." Said Archana. She had never understood the fuss behind Valentine's Day, but she did not like to crush the spirit of those who liked to celebrate.
"What will you be doing on Valentine's Day Tai?" asked Umi.
"Nothing!" said Archana and started laughing. "We don't celebrate all this."
"But why?"
"There is no reason actually." Said Archana. "We just don't."
"Aaha! Showing saris!" remarked Savita as she entered the living room and sat with Archana and Umi. "Archana you also show your new sari to Umi, the one Manav gifted you on your marriage anniversary last month. You know Umi, it's worth 10,000 rupees!"
Umi nodded politely, while Archana simply shook her head. In some ways, Savita Aai would never change. Even today, she loved competing and she absolutely loved showing off. Archana got up and brought her sari.
"Very pretty," said Umi, admiring the fine texture of the silk and the lovely peacock blue colour. "I'm sure you will look beautiful in it, Manav Ji has fine taste."
"Oh no, I chose it," said Archana proudly. "Manav took me to the shop and asked me to choose whichever I wanted to buy."
Umi seemed astonished. "Really? He didn't choose himself? But it's a gift right?"
Archana casually replied back, "He isn't fond of shopping actually. He gets bored while shopping. So Aai and I selected it, while he indulged the children at the nearby video games stall. Thanks to him we could shop in peace." She laughed.
"Nice." Umi said politely. "And then how did you celebrate the day?"
"Well, we went to the temple together, took blessings of our elders and then the day went just like other days and finally all of us had dinner outside."
"Oh.." remarked Umi, in a way that made Archana feel weird. She brightened up again. "You know Tai, Dheeraj is very romantic. He loves surprising me. He always comes up with these cute ideas of making me feel special- walks on solitary beaches, sitting on Marine Drive till late, a long drive on his bike- just about anything. He gets me a gift- big or small- almost every fortnight. Sometimes ear-rings, sometimes saris..he says he saw it on a mannequin and wanted to see how it would look on me. I always feel that more than the gift, it is the thought that counts, so it makes me feel really special that he is always thinking of me or wants to spend some lone time with me. And there is something so cute in the fact that he is unable to speak to me about his love, but his little actions more than say everything!"
Archana nodded. For some reason, this talk was making her feel awkward.
"You know Tai, whenever you told me about the little things Manav ji did which made you fall for him when you were newly married, those sweet little romantic actions- pav bhaji dates, bangles, getting bhuttas, hesitantly trying to convey his feelings to you- I always wished that my husband would be equally romantic. God listened to my prayers.. I feel so lucky now!" said Umi happily.
Archana wasn't sure she was enjoying this conversation any more now.
"Enjoy it while it lasts.", smirked Savita Aai. "Few years into marriage, all the men become the same. Romance vanishes. You sit in the same room, but the sweet nothings are all lost by then. You grumble about him dirtying his clothes, he grumbles about the bad food. I have an experience of more than 35 years."
"Dheeraj is not like that." Said Umi in a small voice. "He won't change like other men, who forget how to shower love on their wives few years after marriage, become indifferent and have the 'ghar ki murgi, daal barabar' attitude."
"I'll get tea." Said Archana suddenly. She got up and walked into the kitchen.
**************************
The kids were still playing outside. Archana finished the chores of the kitchen. She made a cup of tea for herself and sat in the bedroom to fold up the clothes.
She had been unable to concentrate on any task ever since Umi had gone. For some reason, her talks kept on reverberating in her mind again and again.
Her mind went back to the old days. She remembered the silver bangles Manav had bought for her after marriage. She remembered how he had tried to surprise her once by getting a corncob, knowing that she really liked it. She remembered an orange coloured sari he had given her as a gift after she had come into the house. She remembered how he would bolster courage to take her out for a movie or pav bhaji when he had the chance- just the two of them, no other family members. She remembered how he would always insist on eating with her only, in fact, before she turned pregnant, she would take his lunch box for him herself, so that both of them could eat together. Sometimes, when he was very affectionate, he would feed her with his own hands, and she would do the same to him.
A smile came on her lips as she remembered those precious moments snatched from their busy routines. Manav had indeed been very romantic, and he had a style of his own- understated, shy and extremely affectionate. It was not just about gifts- his little displays of affection, in any form, always touched her. He was not the one to speak a lot about his love for her, but sometimes a quick glance, a smile conveyed it all to her that he had been thinking of her. Many a times he would end up saying something really sweet or affectionate and then blush over it, making her blush too, trying to imagine what would be going through his mind. She remembered long nights when she would snuggle into his chest and talk her heart out to him. She remembered the sweet nothings he whispered into her ear sometimes, under sheets. Sometimes when they were done with love making, he would speak passionately of his love for her, all shyness dumped in a corner.
And now.. when was the last time he had told her an 'I love you?'.
She was startled. She started trying to recollect, but somehow couldn't remember. She tried to busy herself by working more furiously now. But she could not ignore the voice in her brain. Finally, she finished her work and lay down on the bed.
She was happy in her life. All these days, she had been extremely happy. She had everything, and though her life would be looked upon as 'normal' and 'ordinary', she felt she was special. Her husband was the most caring and understanding person in the world, and such a good father. He was a busy man, but he took time out for everybody, took active interest in the household, the activities of the children, tried to indulge his old parents. No wonder then that everyone loved him so much. As a husband, she couldn't imagine anything he lacked. He was always there for her, understood her, respected her, valued her presence in his life. Physically and emotionally, there had been nothing lacking in their relationship, or that was what she had felt so far. But now..
No matter how much she tried, she could not drive out the thought that over five years, things had changed in their relationship. Something had changed. The love was there, but its expression had vanished. Somewhere the spark of their marriage had gone now. Manav was not as expressive or romantic now, and even she had sobered down somewhat. He was practical and matter of fact. Now there was no stealing of glances, no sneak peeks, no glancing in each others' eyes. It was just plain simple discussion related to everyday matters. She had never minded this change in their life- maybe it had been something indispensable with the way their life had shaped up- she had never even noticed it- but today it made her feel as if there was a big void in their life. Nowadays they had a matter of fact approach to everything. These days there were few surprises, unlike earlier. While buying a gift, Manav practically thought that it was best to give her something she liked or wanted after discussing with her, rather than rely on romantic assumptions and try to surprise her. And even though she had never thought less of it, she knew he loved her, yet somewhere it was symbolic of the change. And it was not because of the children or added responsibilities that this change had come over. It was not as if he was crowded due to them and didn't have time for her. Manav had always had responsibilities, for that matter. He had supported his family all alone, and they had Sachu to take care of even when they had been newly married the second time. What was worth noticing now was that even their private moments were not the same as earlier- they would talk a lot- about budget, children, the new house they were planning to buy, relatives, Vandu and her kids, each other- then they cuddled together, sometimes made love and went to sleep. Then it was another morning and another hurried day.
Yes, she had a very fulfilling life. But somewhere, something was missing- the little moments of intimacy and romance even in the midst of a hurried day- those quiet glances and sweet moments stolen out of a hurried schedule. It had been days since Manav had surprised her with a gajra or a walk. It had been months since she had taken food to Manav at the garage or eaten with him or fed him with her own two hands, nowadays her mind was always on stuffing food down little Soham's mouth. And she was not sure whether the genuine, heartfelt tender romance in those moments could return now, no matter how much she wanted them back.
Truth was- after all their great love story, they were now no more different than any other couple who had been in a marriage for years. L
She could hear Manav's voice now, calling out to her. He must have come back from the garage. She got up and went outside, and there he was, sitting on the diwan in their living room, removing his socks and rolling his shirt sleeves up till his elbow. He gave her a quick smile, and as usual, he started talking to her, telling her about how his day had been, complaining about the traffic, the customers at the garage, the loan rates at the bank for their new flat, enquiring about the children, asking about how her day had gone, what she had made for dinner etc. As usual, she told him everything. As usual, she made tea for him, while he stood resting his tall frame against the kitchen counter, adjusting his sleeves and watching her at work.
Usually, she enjoyed this time of the day- it was their 'lone time' when they planned and discussed about most things, poked fun at each other, laughed, chatted like friends. Today however she was silent. Her mind kept going back to how both of them had been earlier. In those days, she would wait in the evenings for Manav to come back, looking at the clock. Without him, there seemed to be something amiss in the house- the house seemed empty and large. When he finally returned, she would shy away and pretend to be busy in making tea, while he would watch her with piercing eyes or give her a hug, complain about having to go to work leaving her behind, tease her that he would make her his secretary so that they could be together. He would hold her hand while he had tea, she would hug his arm, and they would sit together, enjoying their little moment together, before they were called away by the rest of the family members- eagerly waiting for the night. Many mornings, he would rush out to work, but not before he had deposited a quick kiss on her cheek- sometimes by fooling her to look the other way.
Archana sighed. Those were the days!
**************************************
That night, she entered her bedroom after finishing the kitchen chores. The children had fallen asleep with Savita and Damodar while listening to bedtime stories. Manav was lying on their bed. She sat near him and fondled his hair affectionately.
He opened his eyes and smiled lazily at her. "What?"
"What 'what'?"
"Why are you so silent today? I have been noticing since the evening."
"Nothing." She said shortly. She wondered whether she should say something to Manav about what was going in her mind, but could not think of how to say it all. She did not want to make it look like she was unhappy with him- the last thing she wanted was to hurt him.
"Something is wrong, I know it." He said. "You might not tell me, but I can guess it from your behaviour."
She hesitated. "Manav," she tried. "Are you happy with our married life?"
He gave her a quizzical look. "What sort of question is that?"
"Serious question. Don't you think that something has changed in our life, between us?" she asked him.
"No." He said simply. "Why? Are you unhappy?" he got up with a start and held her hands. "Is something wrong Archana?"
There was so much of concern in his eyes that Archana was touched. She was being foolish, she told herself. She was being naive in comparing herself with Umi. How did it matter if the romance quota of their marriage was dipping day by day and Manav had not said 'I love you' since a long time now? Did not his genuine behaviour, his care and concern for her that she could feel every minute, his little thoughtful actions that showed that he thought of her all the time- did not all of this say more than those three words? Was it worth it to hurt him or make him feel incompetent just for the sake of a little more romance?
"Not at all," she spoke out loudly to herself, then looked at Manav. "Nothing is wrong. Let's go to sleep."
"Sure?"
She nodded. He relaxed and lay down again. Usually they lay down on the bed and talked until they were sleepy or in the mood to make love, but tonight, she lay down with her back to him and looked into the light of the night lamp, trying to drive thoughts out of her mind. Was she really a ghar ki murgi like Umi had said? Had Manav become indifferent to their personal space? Did he take their relationship, or her, for granted now, or had the romance lost steam bcos he was no longer attracted to her in the same way as earlier? Did she not look as good as she looked 5 years back, she wondered sadly, or did Manav perceive her only as the mother of his children now and not his fairytale princess?
It was not really the first time she had such self deprecatory thought though. Such thoughts came in her mind everytime some of her friends jokingly told her to watch out for Manav, he was in his mid 30's now and still handsome- one of these days, he would fly off with someone else if he lost interest in her. She trusted Manav too much to think he would ever cheat her, but the lack of that spark in their relationship made her uneasy. At 60, her father still did sweet things for her mother sometimes- he would break into a romantic song for her Aai and make her cry with laughter. Manav on the other hand was always immersed in work, children, expenses, and she too was always busy in her daily chores and responsibilities. She wondered if they had aged too soon. If so, what would happen by the time they reached their 60's- she thought with a shudder. Were children and commitment the only things linking them now, she thought morosely.
In the midst of her thoughts, she felt Manav's large hand climbing up her waist, drawing her to him. His head rested on the nape of her neck and his warm breath made her shiver. "I know something is occupying your mind, I'll drive it away." He whispered. With that, the last of her negative thoughts vanished. She turned round and hugged him close.
"I am an idiot." She told herself.
***************************************
Another afternoon at the Deshmukh household, and perhaps one of the sweetest ever! That day, Sachu returned from school with a Valentine greeting card. In his crafts class, the teacher had told the students to make a heart shaped card and paint it with attractive colours, saying that it was Valentine's Day and they could give it to someone whom they loved. Sachu had addressed his card to his Aai. It read:
Happy Valintine Day to my dearestest Aai
I love you
Sachu
It was the first Valentine Card Archana had ever received in her life. She was so overcome by emotions due to Sachu's sweet gesture that she forgot to ponder on why 6 year olds were being taught about Valentine's Day in schools. Rather, she caressed Sachu's hair lovingly and gave him a kiss on his forehead, her eyes twinkling like stars. Little Soham, who witnessed his Aai showering all affection on his elder bro, decided to gift something too, and gave Archana one of his toys- a duck which was pulled by a string. She laughed at him and drew him into a tight embrace. Both her kids were the biggest darlings in the world, she thought, and decided to take them out for ice-cream later in the evening.
It was when she went to the nearby mall with Savita Aai and the children that she saw the hullaballoo regarding V-day. The mall was decorated with heart shaped balloons and festoons. There were special offers in almost every shop and cafe. There was a big crowd in the gift and greeting shops- in fact the whole mall was jam packed with youngsters. Somehow she led the children to the ice cream parlour and ordered their favourite chocolate ice-creams, a kulfi for Savita Aai and a butterscotch ice-cream for herself. As they ate, she watched the youngsters at an adjoining table and paid attention to their convo, noticing how excitedly they showed the gifts they had brought for their husbands or boyfriends, discussing about the probable reaction and their plans for a romantic evening ahead. Archana smiled to herself. Valentine's Day might be debatable in itself, but it surely perked things up for couples.
And then she suddenly had a brainwave. How would it be if she decided to make Manav feel special this Valentine's Day? Yes, he didn't believe in such things, but hadn't she felt lovely when her little boys had given adorable presents to her? At the end of the day, everyone liked being loved and pampered for a change. Manav too would like it, she thought, her eyes straying towards the Raymonds showroom in one corner of the mall. And then who knows, maybe it would spark up things between the two of them, once again? After all- Manav still loved her and even the desire was there, she thought, thinking of last night shyly. Maybe it would bring back what was missing in their life right now, the romance factor, she thought.
"See what you've done!" Savita's words snapped Archana out of her thoughts. Her ice-cream had melted to a gooey mass in her cup, and Soham's face was smeared with chocolate ice-cream that he had been trying to eat on his own. He looked adorable and dirty. But she didn't care. Instead she looked at Savita Aai hopefully. "Aai, will you take care of the children for a while? I have some shopping to do.."
Savita's eyes gleamed with mischief. "What's the plan?" she asked.
**************************************
Preview for next part: Deshmukh house- Valentines like never before! 😃
(PS: I don't know the name of Umi's husband, so I named him Dheeraj!😆 Don't mind Umi!😳)
Edited by nikitagmc - 13 years ago
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