When will Sandhya find her Sooraj??

"When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj?? "

There were times when Women scholars roamed around in this very country and matched argument to argument with the men. There were hundreds of Sandhya's walking the same very streets where women are brutally hurt in every possible way today.

On one hand is a man trying in every possible way to educate his wife.He is standing there as her friend, her support, her love and her husband. But on the other hand, he has to lie to his own mother and hide this fact. When will a Bhabo wake-up and accept the changes?When will the wife be able to step out of her "house-wife" shoes and step into the shoes of her choice? When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj?

And somewhere else, is a strong woman who runs a night-school, but she has to fight her own son who wants to demolish his mother's long-cherished dream and the temple of knowledge for his own benefits. How right is this? When will the world recognize a certain "Malathi madam" and her service to society.When will the powerful beasts with different selfish interest stop troubling her? When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj?

A bunch of older generation woman and nosy neighbors!! What on earth do they take their daughter-in-laws to be? Machines that will bring in newer generations of their blood? When will these kind of women stop being nemesis to their own kind??When will a Bhabo, wish to give her daughter-in-law the dreams back rather than forcing upon, her own wants, on the DIL? When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj?

The world outside ,DABH land is not much different either. On one side, a recent article says, the head honchos, the CEO's and the leading people of most of the important companies in India included Intel, HP and Facebook( the Indian divisions) are women.There are hundreds of women in different classes and different sectors who have gone ahead to become successful entrepreneurs, artists, engineers, civil workers and home-makers. On the other side, we here news about heinous crimes done against women - domestic abuse and physical abuse of the worst possible nature, female infanticides, many daughters forced to marry at an early age so that they are not in the "way" for their more respect brothers, a political leader claiming that "Women should know their limits. Bad happens when a women crosses her lakshman rekha".The same politician forgets to mention how safe and secure women where under the rule of Lord Rama. And we have news of women being subjected to a severe sense of inferiority complex both in her own house and outside too.

The result of these crimes has continuously been more restrictions on women. Women should not be allowed to carry mobile phones.Women must wear a veil every-time they step outside the house.Women must not dress in a way that may provoke a man. Women must be educated just enough to be able to run a family,nothing more, nothing less.Women must not step outside the house after evening.Women must not do that and women must not do this. The place of Women is in the kitchen and not outside it.Change the school and college dress-code for girls. Some of it may have arised due to the concerns of the family members, but it's still a punishment.

For God's sake, when will the punishment be met to the culprit rather than the one who is been the subject of the crime?When will a Sandhya stop fighting for things that are a everyday mundane availability to her male counterparts?When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj??

When will all this stop? When will every Sandhya find her Sooraj? When will every woman feel free, safe and secure and see the new world and a new morning- A new thought process in the mindset of people both men and women alike? When will a Sandhya find her Sooraj?

I had tears in my eyes reading it...

You have said everything...nothing more to add...

I just wish and hope and pray that thing change for the better...

Amazing! I have to say this is the all time best post ever written.

Basic humanity is all that is needed. Every human is capable of it. It is not that difficult. Not just women, all mankind can live well and prosper by being true to what makes one human.

1. It has been almost 5000 years since women were allowed to move freely and express their viewpoints and debate without being put down.

2.For that to change a mere 100 years is insufficient. West has taken 300 years.

3.The change at least in the Indian context has to start with the family first. If a girl and a boy are treated equal by the family then respect for women will start from there.

4. The school curriculum has to be structured in such a way that right from childhood children are taught to be respectful towards women.

5.Media can play a powerful role in this awakening. The print media can reach only the educated few. It is the television which can reach remote corners of India and start the process of change.

6. All crimes against woman right from eve teasing should be harshly and swiftly punished. Unless that happens there will be no deterrent.

7.Unless an Indian man accepts the new Indian woman who is educated, economically independent and expresses her opinion at will, rapes will not stop or go down. To a great extent rapes in India are due to inability on the part of males to accept this gradual change. They feel they can show their physical domination by raping the woman and making her feel ashamed and succeed in keeping her suppressed.

8.Coming down hard on female foeticide will prevent the gender ratio from being skewed. Men have dominated us for centuries and our own gender have helped them in reinforcing this domination.

9.Governance is a major issue, be it the policing or the judiciary, they have to be pressurised each time to do their work. When there is public pressure or media outcry, the case is taken up not otherwise. We need a good leadership at the centre to push us in that direction. We do not have it now.

10.. Last but not the least we have to be patient as change takes time. A 5000 year old setup cannot be wished away. Things have improved with the spread of education but lot needs to be done. We are all caught up in the in between period where neither has our education given us full freedom nor are we totally backward and cannot go out to work. Serials like Diya aur Bati hum through a submissive Sandhya have tried to show the fight from within the system to break it. A Sandhya who revolts , answers back and leaves the house would never be emulated or followed. DABH seeks to create 1000s of Sandhya not one who walked away from the system. Bhabo represents traditionalism and this serial is a fight between the conservative mind and modernity for domination.

The answer to your question would be change will be shown coming in the serial, on the ground it is likely to take another half a century.

A very inspirational and brilliant piece of writing MissCooleyes! 👏

The one thing I would like to say is that for me, perhaps the most important point you made was when you said "But this hybridism in the society needs to vanish. Not slowly but as soon as possible." It's this sense of urgency which we must have! We simply cannot afford to wait. We waited until our capital became the city with the highest rate of rape in India, we can't afford to wait until our country becomes the place with the highest rate of violence against women in the world (apparently, we are not that far off)! I am happy to see that the sense of urgency has set in Delhi (as evident by the protests). This urgency however, should not have a linear, but rather exponential growth!

Now, you may say, chill out Samir! Change will happen when it happens. NO! Change will happen when YOU make it happen! This is simply a law of the universe! And why should we chill?! People have spilled their blood to give us freedom; the least we can do is raise our blood pressure to maintain that same freedom! And mind you, the onus is not just on women's/human rights groups! I'm talking about every man and women in our society. Yes, both sexes, even women! (MissCooleyes, you have already highlighted this point in your post, but I felt it to be important enough to be reiterated). The point being, we should all have a sense of urgency to change things! We can't wait for history to take its course; we are not going towards history ... we are going towards the future! Start at home, change things, go local, expand,... just don't wait!

Now, don't think that I can't relate to the issue, because I'm not living in India. This problem is not an Indian problem; it's a global problem. Even in our community, a vigorous 'white ribbon campaign' took place last month. (basically, wearing a white ribbon signifies your pledge to 'never commit, condone or remain silent about violence against women and girls'. And this campaign is mainly targeted toward men).

To be honest, my initial reaction to this thread was to end my post with just writing the first line. It took a lot from me to say what I have said beyond that line. Thus, I urge you to take what I've said seriously as well.