Double standards- edited topic : note : 15

So ignoring most of the nonsense that was shown in today's epidose, I found some truth in what Zara said to the lovely uncle and her daughter about how young girls and women are generally sidelined to particular roles in society.

That said, during my time here in the forum, I have read countless posts applauding Indira for financially supporting her family. Many have expressed their appreciation by calling Indira the "son" of the family.

So this leads me to ask the question "What if Indira were a man?"

I think it is safe for me to assume that most girls/women in today's society want and expect all the rights and opportunities that are afforded to our male counterparts. But if we expect all the rights that men have, then why not the responibility? If men are expected to financially support themselves and their familes, then why not women? What is so special and admirable in women working to support their families? Would we have the same level of respect and admiration for this character if Indira were a man? Or would we not find anything extraordinary in this character because we have been conditioned to believe that taking care of the household/famly, paying the bills etc is a man's duty?

Would love to hear what you all think about this!

Originally posted by: Pari117

Well Said D, just because Indira is a Lady serving her family makes her get all the appreciation over here, it reflects how many times girls prove that they are now running parallel to men, yet the society somehow proves that they are NOT.

If Indira was a man serving family then definately it was not a big deal and nobody would have applauded for that but just because she is a woman she gets all the lime light, this thinking only proves that somewhere within ourselves we have not moved on.

At one side we say she is not less than a man who is taking all the responsibilities but at other side we are making her great for her care towards family! its just a contrast, this means still we have not considered her equivalent to a man.

being a daughter of the family, wasn't it her duty to serve her family??

a good son would have been doing the same what she is doing, but we wouldnt have applauded him

it proves:

we havent moved forward by mentality

though we say that indira is not less than a man but clearly we consider Indira a woman who is different from other woman thats the reason we love her and applaud her

Being equivalent to man and Being different from fellow ladies only???

here lies the difference

I would have definitely applauded Indira even if she was a man...bcos considering d kind of family dat she needed 2 feed n take care of is horrendous...regardless of the gender anyone wud acknowledge d fact dat a sole person is taking care of the whole family without expecting anything in return...n wen d family in question is sharma family den dat person certainly needs 2 b appreciated be it indira or shweta or evn rishi..bt rishi has nvr been shown 2 take up any responsibility as well hence d woman power rules in HD...😛

evn wen vidit was supposed 2 enter all wer anticipating dat he n indira will manage SN bt things turned out 2 b different...

The answer to your question is no. No one would have looked again in the direction of Sharma Nivas if the family had been supported by a son. Because these are the stereotypes that are alive and kicking thanks to more than 90% of the TV shows and film produced in India. Watch one Sooraj Barjatya film or one Balaji soap and you will believe that the feminist movement never happened. Empowerment and emancipation take on whole new meanings.

A couple of 'modern' women in my workplace (which is in Mumbai), have opinions like wearing saris is regressive, making rotis is regressive, and so on. However, when it comes to marriage, especially in the arranged marriage setup, they want the guy to be well-settled. Which means he should have his own house, a car, and an income which exceeds the girl's income. The explanation is: its still a man's world and there are some things that only a guy should do. A convenient sort of feminism which is tailored for the occasion.

This, in a way, harks back to the exchange on stereotypes that you were having with AllThingsNice in the other thread. I remember reading something on these lines there. Sadly, though, the stereotypes aren't limited to fiction. Many of them are real.

Sorry for intruding. I intended to keep it short, but failed 😕

What if Indira were a man? Well, yes she would have been applauded and respected in the same way if she was a man. Any individual if learns his/her resposibilities and duties at the age of 16, by suffering betrayal from father, without getting shattered pledges to serve his/her family would be applauded. Here gender won't matter, atleast for me.

Originally posted by: Heema22

Walden, this is very brainy post for Friday night!! We are used to seeing very different kinds of posts over the weekends. You know the history , I do not have to remind you!!

Now my tired brain will try to answer your post!!

I liked what ZARA said today, she made point , with out getting her gun out . She made great points !!!

I do not think we will ever reach the equality for men and women . This show was appreciated for Indira, being a girl and taking over all the responsibility . If this was Vidhit or Munna. Doing what Indira did. Do you think that show will go on for 300 episodes? BIG NO!!

For generation in recent history Gender roles are well defind by men!! They defined role for Women and given motherly role for Cooking, House keeping and raising children . For men role was bread winner and head of the family .( During cave days men and women looked for their own food) Great personality in 19th century like Susan B Anthony started Women's rights movement and till today we are fighting for our rights and we have come long way but on the way to these achievements we overlook our brothers role and named it " Man's responsibilities " No one want to come out of it ,and we might not ever able to change it, that why many Indian states ,do not welcome girls birth and when boy is born they are very happy because from first day his birth his consider him as parent supporter and bread winner of the family, "FAMILY CHIRAG!! "Have you ever seen parents saying that to a little girl ? Girls are still " Paraya Dhan " Mehman in parents home !" Parents are relieved when girl is married and send way ! She is always burden to the family. (Now I am talking about general View ) Untill this view is changed man will be always hold responsible for his duties and not appreciated ! To change this , , Man has to change his name after marriage, man has to start living with girls patents , then this will be in role reversal situation and appreciated more !! Sorry for the long rant but society has not change that much. that's why House husband role did not work in US and mothers went on being mothers and fathers are being fathers and together they are parents ,and taking equal responsibility for the household . We did come long way didn't we?

Originally posted by: arti_17

I would have definitely applauded Indira even if she was a man...bcos considering d kind of family dat she needed 2 feed n take care of is horrendous...regardless of the gender anyone wud acknowledge d fact dat a sole person is taking care of the whole family without expecting anything in return...n wen d family in question is sharma family den dat person certainly needs 2 b appreciated be it indira or shweta or evn rishi..bt rishi has nvr been shown 2 take up any responsibility as well hence d woman power rules in HD...😛

evn wen vidit was supposed 2 enter all wer anticipating dat he n indira will manage SN bt things turned out 2 b different...

n its just nt abt praising Indira all d time...ppl around her r nt evn worth appreciating n thats what makes her all d more gr8!!! if anyone in her family would hv atleast cared 2 share her responsibilty i wud hv definitely applauded dat person 4 doing so be it male or female...

plus in our society if u see a single father managing his kids n home as well his work he is always thought highly of...in a similar manner if a woman does so why cant she be appreciated...??? a housewife is nvr given credit 4 managing a family...dat can give rise 2 another debate...

n i guess u hv just read posts whr Indira has been applauded bt probably conveniently ignored posts whr she has been bashed n Rishi has been considered gr8 4 every damn thing dat he does...so i guess evn she deserves a word of appreciation 4 her selfless deeds...!!!!!

i wonder if ppl hv problm wid Indira being given d limelight n praised or they really do want a change in perception 2wards d society...😕

finally its a matter of perception n nt hw forward our thinking is...as sumone replied in ur post dat if she were a man no 1 wud hv applauded her..i dnt think so...4get d society we shud start wid ourselves...if we cant appreciate her nw we will definitely nt appreciate her evr...!!!!!