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I came across a very interesting article on why moral leaders are often branded as annoying. It's a psychological analysis of why people tend to dismiss, ridicule, and even hate people who seem morally right. The article is so interesting because it seems to explain why there are so many negative criticisms of Anandi as the "mahaan" one or her morally upright gestures.
What does the article say? Here is the link for those who like some thought provoking reading :
http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/brainiac/2011/08/why_moral_leade.html?camp=pm
The article talks about something called the "anticipated reproach". That means, whenever we come across people who are on a moral high ground than us, we tend to judge ourselves in comparison; and unconsciously we realize we are not up to that mark in terms of our morality. We come face to face with our own flaws, the moral compromises we make daily--which is very normal--and as a basic human nature, we try to justify ourselves in anticipation of getting judged. The end result is hatred and dislike for the morally superior---the whole idea being we like to set the definition of morality just where we ourselves stand. Anyone catering to a higher moral standard irritates us, and we tend to call that "not normal" or "too mahaan".
The same thing applies to our or even Gauri's irritation with Anandi's "mahaan" acts. What is and what has been usually the logic? There can be nobody like her; that she is not normal; that she is not real; that no normal girl will act like her. Note how all of these comments are based on what "I" consider as normal and real, which is again based on where I myself stand regarding morality. If I am a person who takes bribe, I will brand taking bribes as normal or what everyone else does, and hate the person who refuses to take bribes as acting too mahaan. That's precisely why mahanta is so annoying for many of us😊. I have seen numerous activists and social workers getting ridiculed for their noble mission. I myself have been privy to such an attitude, i must admit. I used to laugh at and run away from any campaigner who would try to mobilize people in the campus for a cause. Take for example yesterday's episode. What Anandi did with Sanchi is the best and most mature way to handle animosity with in-laws. Yet, I am sure a lot of us were irritated by Anandi's cool demeanor---precisely because we start judging what we would have done in this situation and realize we wouldn't have been so graceful😆.
Now Anandi is immaterial here---if we are irked by Anandi's acts on the TV, it's most likely that I will be irked by such people in real life too. It's not the bitchy ones, but rather the good, harmless or proactive people who get most talked about in a condescending way. And therein lies the problem. I guess there is nothing wrong in being less moral. Morality is often a result of our social conditions, and we all have our individual parameters of morality. Not everybody can be a mother Teresa or Gandhiji. However, the least we can do to kill the little goodness that is left in this world is stop ridiculing people who are morally better than us, or snigger at people who are trying to make a difference.
What does the article say? Here is the link for those who like some thought provoking reading :
http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/ideas/brainiac/2011/08/why_moral_leade.html?camp=pm
The article talks about something called the "anticipated reproach". That means, whenever we come across people who are on a moral high ground than us, we tend to judge ourselves in comparison; and unconsciously we realize we are not up to that mark in terms of our morality. We come face to face with our own flaws, the moral compromises we make daily--which is very normal--and as a basic human nature, we try to justify ourselves in anticipation of getting judged. The end result is hatred and dislike for the morally superior---the whole idea being we like to set the definition of morality just where we ourselves stand. Anyone catering to a higher moral standard irritates us, and we tend to call that "not normal" or "too mahaan".
The same thing applies to our or even Gauri's irritation with Anandi's "mahaan" acts. What is and what has been usually the logic? There can be nobody like her; that she is not normal; that she is not real; that no normal girl will act like her. Note how all of these comments are based on what "I" consider as normal and real, which is again based on where I myself stand regarding morality. If I am a person who takes bribe, I will brand taking bribes as normal or what everyone else does, and hate the person who refuses to take bribes as acting too mahaan. That's precisely why mahanta is so annoying for many of us😊. I have seen numerous activists and social workers getting ridiculed for their noble mission. I myself have been privy to such an attitude, i must admit. I used to laugh at and run away from any campaigner who would try to mobilize people in the campus for a cause. Take for example yesterday's episode. What Anandi did with Sanchi is the best and most mature way to handle animosity with in-laws. Yet, I am sure a lot of us were irritated by Anandi's cool demeanor---precisely because we start judging what we would have done in this situation and realize we wouldn't have been so graceful😆.
Now Anandi is immaterial here---if we are irked by Anandi's acts on the TV, it's most likely that I will be irked by such people in real life too. It's not the bitchy ones, but rather the good, harmless or proactive people who get most talked about in a condescending way. And therein lies the problem. I guess there is nothing wrong in being less moral. Morality is often a result of our social conditions, and we all have our individual parameters of morality. Not everybody can be a mother Teresa or Gandhiji. However, the least we can do to kill the little goodness that is left in this world is stop ridiculing people who are morally better than us, or snigger at people who are trying to make a difference.
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