Domestic Violence - Page 7

Originally posted by: Luvchoc

I would like to jot down my experience here...

I met someone in my college and we became lovers...during courtship days, he once hit on my face but I shrugged it off thinking he didn't mean it. This happened for couple of times where he will hit me for trivial reasons or while having small fights in romance, but every time I will ignore it thinking either it was my fault or he will not repeat it. Finally, I was so blind in love that I married him. Post marriage too these incidents never ceased. After so much of humiliation, love and respect was gone from the relationship. My heart had become bitter and I could not take it anymore. Once, accidentally I tore the pocket of a kurta which his mother had gifted him. It was simple cotton kurta which he used to wear at home. He was very upset, I told him that I will fix it in a way that it will be as good as new. But he became so pissed that he hold me down against the floor, put his one knee on my chest and started slapping me continuously. I could not move and kept on crying and pleading him to stop. But he did not. I, finally, mustered up all my strength and pushed him back. He lost his grip and I took control and gave him one tight slap. I still can't believe that I actually did it. But that slap made him scared. He realized how it hurts ones face and more than the face how hard it hurts ones self-respect. Hitting stopped from then onwards but hating did not. Finally, he started having extra-marital affair and that was when I decided I cannot stay with him anymore and I ended our 4 years old marriage. Today, I regret for not hitting him back on the first instance, atleast we would not ended up in a wedlock and I would not have wasted 4 long years of my life in humiliation and torture. Also, when we face torture we also subject our family to it too. Along with me my parents too used burn in pain every day.

So, I think, every woman should say no to DV from day 1. If you ignore it on day 1, then the male thinks you are weak and cannot protest and he can do anything he feels like.

Originally posted by: suk19

The biggest problem is the social pressure that we have as women, parents get taunted, sisters n brothers get hurt with words other people are saying, if you have strong family background like i had you get out of that marriage, my family as much as they have their arguements as much as they have their disagreements they came in full force to protecting me. we have 12 boys n 3 girls in our family from my dads brothers, i came back from my inlaws with bruising n a lot of war paint on (makeup) on my brothers wedding day. my chachas went balistic my cousin brothers all got together n that was the last day i saw my inlaws my ex n did my family give a damn no they supported me all the way two fingers up n i lived my life, i was fortunate that my hubby now he was the one pursuing me, we became friends at first n when the offer of marriage came i had said no but 9 months later i ended up marrying him This was 6 years after it took time i still have memories of it they do come back now n then but i shake them off. be strong n get out