||~*~DOTW :Infatuation stronger than Love?~*~||

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vandana

@VandyP

Trailblazer

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

hey frends....

its me vandy here.......😊

i'm here to post the

||~*~ Discussion Of the Week~*~||

for the week from 16th August To 22nd August 2010

with the brand new promos airing....the only question that's popping up in our mind is.......

Why is Anuraag with another girl....wen Taani is waiting for him.......we all know he loves Taani...then wat made him fall for another girl........was it the long distance that hampered his relationship....or was it that Anuraag failed to realise that it was only infatuation for the other girl....his love was only for Taani.....

do lets get together and get into some serious discussion.....

"Are long distance relationships a barrier to the whole concept of love????...

is infatuation stronger than love??????

lets see wat the members have to say abt this....do they really understand the difference between love and infatuation???😆😆😆😆

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Zahra

@Pyari_Zahra

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 15 years ago

Sorry I kind of wrote an essay 🤣🤣🤣:

Interesting subject 👏- When infatuated, a person gets completely carried away by a feeling a 'love'. They begin to feel almost addicted to this feeling, as it gives them satisfaction. In their immaturity regarding the notion of love, they are unable to see the difference between infatuation and love. Thus, they begin interpreting their feelings as love.

With Anurag, I guess he may feel the need to hold on to the feeling he gets when he is with Nupur- maybe he is lonely, and her presence seems to fill the gap in his life. Naturally it is easy for him to assume that it is love. The line between infatuation and love is so thin that it is easy to get carried away and believe one is the other.

When I was in school I was 'in love' with a boy 😆 (He didn't 'love' me back, which now I am so glad for 😃). He was always in my dreams, I would always long to see him at school 😳😆. I would gather pictures of him, would always try to take my friends to the places in school where he would be with his friends 🤣. Of course, people would say it was a crush, an obsession, an infatuation 😆. I agree- but at the time I felt I was in love 😳. I cried when I imagined not being with him- the feeling was so strong it overpowered me 😳. Yet I now look back and realise it was just an infatuation. I was liberated from the feeling of what I saw as 'love' when school finished and we both went our separate ways. When I began to completely forget about him, the dreams started fading, I realised it was nothing more than an infatuation- I feel so stupid when I look back at it now 😆.

See, this is one of the differences between love and infatuation. Infatuation is very short-lived, but when we experience it, it feels like the most amazing feeling in the world. Love happens when we fully understand it- when we develop the maturity to comprehend all aspects of it- the commitment, as well as passion, etc. So maybe, Anurag has not completely understood what love is all about, he hasn't the ability to completely recognize it, as he is being sort of thrust into a new environment, with new people, and is thus adapting to it and welcoming the support that he gets from the girl 😳.

It's extremely difficult to distinguish between love and infatuation. Maybe this is why some marriages fail, because people marry in the state of infatuation and later realise they don't love each other? I guess when you're infatuated you think about the other person all the time, as your obsession and liking for that person overpowers every emotion. On the other hand, love is more free, and without any fears- you accept a person despite all their faults, share your own faults, and are more open and committed to each other, purely just to have that person by your side forever 😊.

That's all I can say, really. I certainly do not think infatuation is stronger than love, because infatuation isn't a strong foundation to start a relationship on, it is weak and temporary. Love is what stands out in the end, and this is what Anurag will learn eventually. About long distant relationships, it depends, some relationships work despite the distance, and others don't. If you're really truly in love, then even a long-distance relationship cannot create a hindrance in your love. These kinds of little things should not really be of importance when you love that person 😳.

Love Zahra x

Edited by Pyari_Zahra - 15 years ago

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vandana

@VandyP

Trailblazer

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

thanx a lot zahra for replying...

and i agree with you...

there's a very very thin line between love and infatuation and maximum times it happens such that people fail to distinguish between the two!

in anuraag's case here...i think wat u said was right....taani was his best friend.....he used to confide in her.......and wen they both will be separated....there'll be a void in his life.......a gap which will be filled by nupur....and since he's in a growing age...i somehow feel it'll be more of a physical attraction with nupur...than a bond of love.,...or in other words...he'll have an infatuation for nupur......

and the love story which we'll have to see will be based roughly on the famous saying

"if u love a person...set him free....if he comes back....he's urs....if he doesn't....he never was!"

and i totally disagree with u abt long distance relationship thing....

long distances are indeed a huge hindrance for any relationship to develop fully

Edited by -vandy- - 15 years ago

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431362

Suspended

Posted: 15 years ago

It's true that love and infatuation is differentiated by a thin line.

You see, what is the difference in our activities when we are in love and when we are infatuated? Not much. We act same way when we are infatuated just as same as when we are in love.

According to my POV, infatuation is just an excuse. It's normal that we fall in love with someone in our school or college. We wallow up when they say no to us. Later after we grew up, we think of it and feel relieved that they haven't accepted our love. Why so? Just because it's safe for us that we weren't in love before.

What happens if he agrees? We go out in that small age itself, obviously get spoiled and will result in love failure.

So, when does a love changes to infatuation? only after he ignores us and only after we fell that it's better be not in love with him? That's just justifying our acts...

There are girls who love whoever guys they find on road. If they later say all their previous datings are just infatuation, do we agree? certainly, not.

Therefore, Infatuation is just an excuse to hide our love for them so that the upcoming love of our life don't feel guilty about our past. 😆

One more thing I feel like saying is, Infatuation is much more intense than love. The joy and feel we carry around when we are infatuated is always greater than love. 😳

Regarding the distance, I hope you remember my post in your first love something thread. You know that my fianc is living there in singapore since we are too young. We don't have any contact personally but we'll just talk during my b'days and his b'days and other ramzan like festivals... But we still feel connected and distance never mattered though we are not in touch.

It's all depends on a person's mind. Again, to my point, distance never matters... 😳

Love,
nafee.

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vandana

@VandyP

Trailblazer

+ 6

Posted: 15 years ago

wow...a new dimension to infatuation altogether...

nice one nafee😆😆😆😆😆

but u know...

i feel with love comes a responsibility........infatuation doesn't carry that tag....hence maybe its more joyous...wat say?????

wen u love a person....u tend to be devoted to that person....u have a responsibilty......u need to care...u need to be there for the person...coz u know...its only u on whom ur partner can bank upon in dire situations.....

and as far as infatuation is concerened.....u love a person....with no compulsion that that person needs to love u back!

hence this is the difference

as far as long term relationships are concerened......u maybe right it depends from person to person....but

it does hamper relationships.......there's no doubt abt that!...

i'm not saying it doesn't last...but the fact is.......wen u need the shoulder of a particular person...u don't get it....and then maybe at times a thought might strike to look for other shoulders ....some people get over this urge....some can't!

and here in the case of anuraag...maybe he couldn't get over with that urge...and gave in

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431362

Suspended

Posted: 15 years ago

Oh yes, I can agree that love tags a responsibility together... 😆
When an infatuation is agreed by a person, won't it take a responsibility and become love? 😊

and as far as infatuation is concerened.....u love a person....with no compulsion that that person needs to love u back!

This one I don't understand... 😲 A person who is infatuated don't expect them to love back? 😲

Yes, being a person who got committed, I feel like being lonely sometimes. But I just don't look forward to have a contact since I've stayed single all the time... I can also understand that this doesn't happens with everyone and there are chances for the people to get upset just because they're not together...

Nice and sensitive thread... 👏 Loved it...

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Zahra

@Pyari_Zahra

Rocker

+ 5

Posted: 15 years ago

Originally posted by: azfee
It's true that love and infatuation is differentiated by a thin line.

You see, what is the difference in our activities when we are in love and when we are infatuated? Not much. We act same way when we are infatuated just as same as when we are in love.

According to my POV, infatuation is just an excuse. It's normal that we fall in love with someone in our school or college. We wallow up when they say no to us. Later after we grew up, we think of it and feel relieved that they haven't accepted our love. Why so? Just because it's safe for us that we weren't in love before.

What happens if he agrees? We go out in that small age itself, obviously get spoiled and will result in love failure.

So, when does a love changes to infatuation? only after he ignores us and only after we fell that it's better be not in love with him? That's just justifying our acts...

There are girls who love whoever guys they find on road. If they later say all their previous datings are just infatuation, do we agree? certainly, not.

Therefore, Infatuation is just an excuse to hide our love for them so that the upcoming love of our life don't feel guilty about our past. 😆

I agree with you, and at the same time, I disagree with you. Especially the line in bold, I do not agree with. Yes, love and infatuation is practically the same, the barrier between the two is very thin. But, I don't agree that all infatuation is just an excuse, that it's ultimately love. Are bodies are made in a way where we feel physically and emotionally- I believe love is more emotional, a feeling that can never leave you, and infatuation is more physical attraction, a naive feeling that we are stubborn to fulfil.

I don't believe that you'd try to mask love from the person you love. Certainly love is more open and honest than that. And, I think a person is smart enough to know whether they feel love or infatuation.

If I was to get a partner in the future, I don't think I'd feel guilty that I had feelings for a boy in school, or try to hide it from him. I would definitely not lie to myself about my feelings. I'd prefer being open- because that it what love is about- it's about being free, sharing everything with the person you love. Like Anurag would share everything with Taani, would he really share that much with the Nupur girl? I don't think so.

I don't feel guilty about my infatuation, I feel like I was naive- I mean how old was I then- from 13/14 years? Is that really an age to fully understand or fully experience love, with all it's characteristics- I don't think so. Plus, if a person has been rejected by that person, has not even got to know them, just loves them by staring at them- how can that be love? When we know nothing about that person, their characteristics and facets, how can that be love rather than infatuation?

Isn't love more deeper, where you delve deep into another person's habits, and accept them, despite some of them being annoying? 😆 And I also believe a girl cannot love every single guy she dates or fancies- so infatuation does come into the picture, it is existant and not always an excuse to mask love. I know all this may not really be related to the show, but I wanted to share that.

That's my take on things. I hope it's not confusing.

Love Zahra x

Edited by Pyari_Zahra - 15 years ago

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Megha

@IndigoBlues

Rocker

+ 4

Posted: 15 years ago

We humans have a 'replacement complex' in our minds. Had a fight with best friend? Hang out with someone else. Wishing that your friend's mother was yours too just because she allows her daughter or son to do stuff that you are not allowed to? been there, done that.

In the same way, a lonely Anurag subconsciously searched for someone who would fill that gaping hole in his heart caused by separation from Taani. And he found this in Neha(or nupur, whoever basu's daughter is.) And let's face it, he's a guy. If he wouldn't get attracted to someone, well maybe something's tedha about him, if you get what i mean. 😆

The main reason why long distance relationships don't work is because people form a prejudice for it in their minds even before it begins. Thinking about the miles between them makes them depressed. So they convince themselves that as long as the person they love is not there, they might as well as find someone else. So Anurag convinced himself that with the broken rishta, all the ties between him and Taani were broken, so he might as well as accept that they will never be together so though he consciously did not wish for it, in his heart he just wanted someone to love him the way Taani did.

But when it comes back to square one, he will be in a muddle-his past or his present? And that will be the true test of his love. When that point comes(or rather that episode airs 😆 ), we will all come to know whether his infatuation will triumph over his love.

Infatuation is merely attraction, not true love. If he truly loved that mystery girl in the car(who we will hopefully see and analyse today), what about all those sequences with Taani, where he goes to her to a dargah, a hilltop(i love hills...they are so romantic!), that boat sequence where he lies in her lap and tells her his dreams...does that happen in infatuation? And when he was getting engaged, why that morose look on his face? Cynical people may say that it was simply guilt, but to me it was regret. A regret that finally led him out to scream 'Taani!' and eventually drove him crazy.

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431362

Suspended

Posted: 15 years ago

Oops, double post... 😳

Edited by azfee - 15 years ago

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431362

Suspended

Posted: 15 years ago

#10

Originally posted by: Pyari_Zahra
I agree with you, and at the same time, I disagree with you. Especially the line in bold, I do not agree with. Yes, love and infatuation is practically the same, the barrier between the two is very thin. But, I don't agree that all infatuation is just an excuse, that it's ultimately love. Are bodies are made in a way where we feel physically and emotionally- I believe love is more emotional, a feeling that can never leave you, and infatuation is more physical attraction, a naive feeling that we are stubborn to fulfil.

I don't believe that you'd try to mask love from the person you love. Certainly love is more open and honest than that. And, I think a person is smart enough to know whether they feel love or infatuation.

If I was to get a partner in the future, I don't think I'd feel guilty that I had feelings for a boy in school, or try to hide it from him. I would definitely not lie to myself about my feelings. I'd prefer being open- because that it what love is about- it's about being free, sharing everything with the person you love. Like Anurag would share everything with Taani, would he really share that much with the Nupur girl? I don't think so.

I don't feel guilty about my infatuation, I feel like I was naive- I mean how old was I then- from 13/14 years? Is that really an age to fully understand or fully experience love, with all it's characteristics- I don't think so. Plus, if a person has been rejected by that person, has not even got to know them, just loves them by staring at them- how can that be love? When we know nothing about that person, their characteristics and facets, how can that be love rather than infatuation?

Isn't love more deeper, where you delve deep into another person's habits, and accept them, despite some of them being annoying? 😆 And I also believe a girl cannot love every single guy she dates or fancies- so infatuation does come into the picture, it is existant and not always an excuse to mask love. I know all this may not really be related to the show, but I wanted to share that.

That's my take on things. I hope it's not confusing.

Love Zahra x

Well, it's just your point of view and that was mine. 😊
your points were true in some places and I'm feeling like going with it.
First one has to understand that when a person mentions something, it doesn't mention everybody altogether.
In my real life, I've seen people of that kind and I was mentioning them. If I've met you before and if I'm aware of your infatuation, then I would have understood it better and my POV would be completely different!
Just because my post was below yours, you can't take my examples as I'm pointing you. 😊
You don't need to be guilty. It's natural and what I'm coming to say is, some people use the word 'Infatuation' for love to make others believe that they are just freshers. Simple. 😊
Other than that, your experience and my examples are completely different and I was not mentioning you. 😊 Hope that clears stuffs.
And yes, your post was clear and it was not confusing... 👏

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