Double standards for men an women

singhnilima thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#1

why there is always double standars in our society for men an women..

if a guy had a extramarrital affairs an the wife came to know abt it she is supposed to forgive the man an stay back with her..

but if same thing done by a woman.. the man leaves her..

why so ???????/

the girl is supposed to be at home, not to hang out with frnds an outstation hang outs. but a boy is aloowed for all such things..

the girl shld not have frnds(guy) after marriage byt a guy can have gfs...

am so confused with such double standards..

can u ppl help me out....!!!!!!!!!!!

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samie thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#2
well i think the zamana has changed n still ppl have this traditonal values which i think is extremly unfair as a women should have equal rite as a man
Richa26 thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#3
Well to a large extent things have started looking up....In some remote areas of India it is very disheartening to see women is still treated like the lower class
Edited by Richa26 - 20 years ago
hazelgirl thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#4
it is still a mle dominated society 😛
sweet freedom thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: singhnilima


why there is always double standars in our society for men an women..

if a guy had a extramarrital affairs an the wife came to know abt it she is supposed to forgive the man an stay back with her..

but if same thing done by a woman.. the man leaves her..

why so ???????/

the girl is supposed to be at home, not to hang out with frnds an outstation hang outs. but a boy is aloowed for all such things..

the girl shld not have frnds(guy) after marriage byt a guy can have gfs...

am so confused with such double standards..

can u ppl help me out....!!!!!!!!!!!

i totally agree with u

sowmyaa thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#6
This is indeed nice topic and thoughtful topic. But as some other memebers said yes, people are changing their attitude. There are families who treat thier son and daughter as same and give them same freedom and opportunities. Husband and wife are also seen living their life as life partners rather than one having special set of rules.

However, it is still very very common to see this kind of different rules for men/women, girls/boys. And I would like to blame women too on this issue. I take my own example, that my husband goes out for late night movie with his buddies sometimes, whereas when one of my friend asked to to go out for late night movie once I didn't even ask my husband and told her that it's not possible as I have to get my baby to sleep and I am not comfy. If my husband has to go out of town for his work conference he just inform me whereas if I have to go out for work conference I tell my employee that I will let you know next day and then I "ask" my husband if it's ok that I go for a day or two? Can you manage with our daughter? He never ask me if I can manage with my daughter!!! So i think it's not only men's fault, but also women who is so used to this attitude and trained from her childhood to "respect" their men and treat them as leader of the family. And sometimes if some women do not care to ask their husband or follow the same set of rules as men people talk about them being "extrovert" or not attached to family or not being good enough wife. And people who talk like this are also women. So i personally think we as a women also encourage such attitude in society- knowingly or unknowingly!

same goes with boy/girl. there are families who have different set of rules for their two offspring. with Boys-it's ok with they come home late, or if they have girl as a friend, or if they don't help in household chores. where as girls- it's not ok with they come home late at nights, if they have boy as a friend, or if they sit all day and don't help in household chores. This is sometimes to protect girls from evil in society. Sometime it is for reason. like if boy gets raped (which hardly happens 😕 ) it's ok he can still get married and no one would know..if girl goes late nights and someone rapes her her whole life will be wasted, no one will marry her and she herself will be tortured due to that incident. So parents would like to protect girls more than boys. I think from beginning they treat girls as someone else's "amanat"...she is there only for some years and then they have to hand her to someone else so they have to protect her and take care of her kind of attitude. Whereas boys are theirs for ever.

Rindam thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#7
Interesting, I think double standards exist. I agree its not right but it is a fact.
The biggest Ive seen is wages, women and men are not paid equally and I know this for a fact for the same education, same experiance, in every single field. It is law to not discriminate based on gender but it also against policy to not discuss wages and perks so how does one know they are being cheated a tad bit. I get really angry about this and this is quantifiable, actionable item that can be addressed easily but is not.

Now social lifestyle and benefits always have the other side of the coin. Like -dont go out at night its not safe and that is why we ask you not to- and such double policies can always be played differently as if it were a safety hazard and not a oppressive thing so its hard to argue.

But what's in my paycheck shoudlnt change becasue Im a girl and it does- 😕

sowmyaa thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#8
Rindam, you are right... being a girl should not change our paychecks, but I have never experienced this or heard someone that being a girl is descreminated..atleast not in U.S. I don't know about situation in India, but if that's true it is really sad and unjust.
Rindam thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#9
I've been working in the US for quite some time now and trust me it is true. 😕
Willows thumbnail
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Posted: 20 years ago
#10

Originally posted by: singhnilima


why there is always double standars in our society for men an women..

if a guy had a extramarrital affairs an the wife came to know abt it she is supposed to forgive the man an stay back with her..

but if same thing done by a woman.. the man leaves her..

why so ???????/

the girl is supposed to be at home, not to hang out with frnds an outstation hang outs. but a boy is aloowed for all such things..

the girl shld not have frnds(guy) after marriage byt a guy can have gfs...

am so confused with such double standards..

can u ppl help me out....!!!!!!!!!!!

I believe it is we who set the standards and hence what is dobule standards or otherwise depends on whether you want to raise the bar or comply with the set standards.

Coming to debate about married couples, i believe both enter into a relationship based on all the positive attributes and the most important thing necessity, they need each other's help, well both are equal but if the husband thinks or acts as first among the equals, than i think the relationship is not based on mutual respect, but otherwise for there cannot be first among equals, equality is the pre requisite of any relationship be it marriage or other wise.

Edited by Willows - 20 years ago

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