changing surname after marriage

uknaik99 thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#1
Since Congress MP Priya Dutt publicly outraged against her brother Sanjay Dutt about his decision joining SP.. Sanjay Dutt said following in a interview..


' What was your reaction to a part of your family going against your wife, Maanyata, publicly?

My sister Priya (Dutt) has denied that she is against my wife. Being the eldest member of the family, along with Maanyata, I forgive Priya even if she has any anger towards us. Priya is my blood, nothing can change that. However, Maanyata is Sunil Dutt and Nargis' daughter-in-law, and there are no two ways about that. There's only one Mr and Mrs Dutt in Pali Hill, and that's Maanyata and I. Girls who become part of a new family after marriage must assume their new surname and all the responsibilities that come with it.

' Is that a message to Priya?

That's a message not just to my sisters, but to all girls who hang on to their parents' surname. That's become fashionable these days. But I strongly feel that doing so disrespects the person they have married.

' Those are strong words.

This may sound harsh, but if Maanyata had said she wanted to retain her father's surname, I would've felt offended.

' How do you manage to pull off a balancing act between your wife and sisters?

There is no balancing act. My wife is my wife. She's the topmost priority of my life. Any spouse feels the same way. For Priya, her husband Owen (Roncon) is of utmost importance.



' It's now more than year since your marriage, yet your sisters haven't accepted Maanyata?

Look, do you have a sister? Because if you do, then you'll also know that no sister gets along with her brother's wife. Had my mother been alive, she would've happily accepted Maanyata. Maanyata is a home-maker, just like my mother was.


My question is do you agree with him that Married women should change to thier husband's surname not hang to parents


Edited by uknaik99 - 17 years ago

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Pradarshak thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#2
No, I don't agree with what he says. It's the girls wish if she wants to or not. There should be no problem as long as she does not object to giving her kids the name of father.
After all she was born with it ...... that's her identity .......there is so many memories and MAIKA emotions attached with it .......She spends almost 1/3 of her life with that name. After accepting a person whole-heartedly with taan-maan-dhaan, why pick on name? Give her some space and independence .........let her decide...... you(the man) won't feel disrespectful as Sanjay says here. She will repect you(the man and his family) more for that.
200467 thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#3

Originally posted by: uknaik99

Since Congress MP Priya Dutt publicly outraged against her brother Sanjay Dutt about his decision joining SP.. Sanjay Dutt said following in a interview..


' What was your reaction to a part of your family going against your wife, Maanyata, publicly?

My sister Priya (Dutt) has denied that she is against my wife. Being the eldest member of the family, along with Maanyata, I forgive Priya even if she has any anger towards us. Priya is my blood, nothing can change that. However, Maanyata is Sunil Dutt and Nargis' daughter-in-law, and there are no two ways about that. There's only one Mr and Mrs Dutt in Pali Hill, and that's Maanyata and I. Girls who become part of a new family after marriage must assume their new surname and all the responsibilities that come with it.

😆😆 "The only Mrs Dutt in Pali Hill" keeps changing for thus dude though. Kabhi Richa, kabhi Rhea toh kabhi jo hotey hotey reh gayee - Mads😆 btw, don't agree with his bolded statement above. Given his history of divorces, one would expect him to not be so uptight on name-change. Kya pata how soon Maanyta is going to find herself going back to her maiden name😆
' Is that a message to Priya?

That's a message not just to my sisters, but to all girls who hang on to their parents' surname. That's become fashionable these days. But I strongly feel that doing so disrespects the person they have married.
How about the girls who also "hang on to" their loser brothers who keep getting in one or the other trouble? How come he took his sisters' support for granted during all that court ordeal but now he is having problems with the attention his sister is paying to him!

' Those are strong words.

This may sound harsh, but if Maanyata had said she wanted to retain her father's surname, I would've felt offended.

😆 well, he should not be worried about her holding on to her dad's last name. Wasn't she done changing that name during the course of her first marriage? Now, if she was hell bent on keeping her first husband's last name, then I would see sanju baba getting offended but why to get in competition with the girl's family name...family in which she was born and brought up?
' How do you manage to pull off a balancing act between your wife and sisters?

There is no balancing act. My wife is my wife. She's the topmost priority of my life. Any spouse feels the same way. For Priya, her husband Owen (Roncon) is of utmost importance.
I disagree. A balance needs to be maintained between all relations....and if he was so great at making his spouse feels utmost important, then wonder what went wrong with his first two marriages!



' It's now more than year since your marriage, yet your sisters haven't accepted Maanyata?

Look, do you have a sister? Because if you do, then you'll also know that no sister gets along with her brother's wife. Had my mother been alive, she would've happily accepted Maanyata. Maanyata is a home-maker, just like my mother was.

🤣🤣 that's pure BS😆


My question is do you agree with him that Married women should change to thier husband's surname not hang to parents

Nope. We have had this debate before here as well. His first two wives adopted his last name. Did it do any wonders to his marriage there? He never questioned what surname his sister is hanging on to when she was all out helping him and supporting him and be at his side. Did he question then why she is not making her husband her top priority instead of this bum of a brother? Guy has lost it completely😆...and people blame women for alienating sons from their families😆

chal_phek_mat thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#4

Originally posted by: uknaik99


My question is do you agree with him that Married women should change to thier husband's surname not hang to parents


Its the woman's prerogative

Originally posted by: uknaik99

Since Congress MP Priya Dutt publicly outraged against her brother Sanjay Dutt about his decision joining SP.. Sanjay Dutt said following in a interview..


' What was your reaction to a part of your family going against your wife, Maanyata, publicly?

My sister Priya (Dutt) has denied that she is against my wife. Being the eldest member of the family, along with Maanyata, I forgive Priya even if she has any anger towards us. Priya is my blood, nothing can change that. However, Maanyata is Sunil Dutt and Nargis' daughter-in-law, and there are no two ways about that. There's only one Mr and Mrs Dutt in Pali Hill, and that's Maanyata and I. Girls who become part of a new family after marriage must assume their new surname and all the responsibilities that come with it.

' Is that a message to Priya?

That's a message not just to my sisters, but to all girls who hang on to their parents' surname. That's become fashionable these days. But I strongly feel that doing so disrespects the person they have married.

' Those are strong words.

This may sound harsh, but if Maanyata had said she wanted to retain her father's surname, I would've felt offended.

' How do you manage to pull off a balancing act between your wife and sisters?

There is no balancing act. My wife is my wife. She's the topmost priority of my life. Any spouse feels the same way. For Priya, her husband Owen (Roncon) is of utmost importance.



' It's now more than year since your marriage, yet your sisters haven't accepted Maanyata?

Look, do you have a sister? Because if you do, then you'll also know that no sister gets along with her brother's wife. Had my mother been alive, she would've happily accepted Maanyata. Maanyata is a home-maker, just like my mother was.


Lets face the facts here
The Dutt kids are into squeezing every ounce dignity of their family name and making money out of it
Sanjay Dutt has done it the entire life(it is delivered some nice movies, I loved them, but his filmi character is very much different from his personal life)
His sister is also retaining the name to do same, if she was some Priya jo-blow, would she have carried her Dad's name?
This is not a example you want to use for Women's cause or any culture discussion
Edited by chal_phek_mat - 17 years ago
200467 thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#5

Originally posted by: chal_phek_mat

Lets face the facts here
The Dutt kids are into squeezing every ounce dignity of their family name and making money out of it
Sanjay Dutt has done it the entire life(it is delivered some nice movies, I loved them, but his filmi character is very much different from his personal life)
His sister is also retaining the name to do same, if she was some Priya jo-blow, would she have carried her Dad's name?
This is not a example you want to use for Women's cause or any culture discussion

I agree with you here.
SholaJoBhadkey thumbnail
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Posted: 17 years ago
#6

Originally posted by: uknaik99

My question is do you agree with him that Married women should change to thier husband's surname not hang to parents


An interesting aside to start a new debate???😉
Among Kashmiri Pandits, the woman has to change her first name too when she gets married. She gets a completely new identity😲
66567 thumbnail
Posted: 17 years ago
#7

Originally posted by: SholaJoBhadkey



 
An interesting aside to start a new debate???😉
 
Among Kashmiri Pandits, the woman has to change her first name too when she gets married. She gets a completely new identity😲

..thts a first.. never heard of tht..😲

Edited by Meena1 - 17 years ago

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