NRI groom? Rejected!
2 Jun 2008, 0000 hrs IST,TNN
Hot careers, independence, wanting to be there for their families. Just some of the reasons eligible Indian women won't up and move abroad after marriage. Which explains the decline in the demand for NRI grooms, once considered most-desired prospects on the marriage market.
Make-up and hair expert Swati Gupta says there's no way she's moving out of Bangalore, leave alone India. "Doing anything outside Bangalore is out of the question for me. I'm professionally established here. I don't want to throw all this away for an NRI husband," she says. Career apart, Swati is keen on being there for her parents. "After a few years, I want my parents to travel while I keep things going here. So it's definitely a Bangalore groom for me," she says.
Senior sales executive in a media services company, Sonia B, also says commitment to family is one of the reasons she won't consider an NRI groom. "Besides, with someone who lives so far away, the picture is always hazy. It's too risky to marry someone nobody knows anything about," she says.
Haribabu Injam, who runs a matrimonial services company, concedes that increasingly, career women are not interested in NRI grooms. "Girls here have good jobs in MNCs and earn fat salaries. They don't want to give that up and settle for an NRI groom, who more often than not —having lived in an alien culture — is shy, introverted and unable to adapt to the girl, her friends and family here," he explains.
Usha, learning professional in an IT company, refuses to accept the sense of displacement that comes with marrying an NRI. "I wouldn't have the courage to give up my job, get married to a person living abroad and do nothing there. I may be open to doing the same here because it's familiar territory and easy to get back to where I was if I wanted to," she says.
Despite such clarity among women, Velayudhan AP, who runs a matrimonial services and astrological research company, says women looking for spouses online tend to tie the knot with NRI grooms. "It's dangerous because after 2-3 months, these women realise that the men are not suitable and file for divorce. NRI grooms have usually had pre-marital relationships that haven't worked out and finally concede to marrying a girl from here. Also, they don't always tell the truth about their jobs and salaries. Some are in deep debt and demand dowry. No smart Indian woman will put up with such duplicity," he says.
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After reading this, man was I glad that I don't have to worry.😃 Aarey Rajbabua aur qwertyesquebhai lagta hain aap koh jaldi karnee padegi. Warna aap zhindagi bhur poochtay rahogay, "mein kawara maroonga yah shadi shuda?"
I think that this entire bias against eligible NRI men is baseless and discriminatory. Sure there must be some disgruntled families because of their individual experience with NRI sons-in-law. However what guarantees do families have in India, when they marry their daughters to local eligible bachelors they will live happily ever after?
No marriage comes with a guarantee, anywhere in the world. Marriage is a gamble. It is an adjustment. It is a way of life. It is a compromise. It can be a wonderful experience or it can be pure hell whether overseas or in India. The outcome is entirely subject to, and dependent on the two individuals. So why is this new fad of rejecting eligible NRI men the new mantra? Not all the men of Indian origin living overseas have a closet full of skeletons!!!
Anupamaa
