Abhishek reveals why Ash isn't coming to IIFA - Page 5

Originally posted by: bashful_moon

My thoughts exactly..

I believe girls need moms more during difficult and crucial transitional years of puberty, pre teens.

I had a cousin who was neglected by her mom in those years and it affected her mental health, physical health and studies. Her mom pursued her PhD in those years thinking kids had grown up and she could now focus on her further studies. But she was lonely, slipping and had no one to talk to or focus on her or give her time to deal with rapid changes and challenges in that time or handle her dysmenorrhea and she lagged behind in studies and found it hard to grapple with bullies at school, rapid body changes like weight gain, hirsutism, PMS, sexist attitude of older relatives in family, peer pressure etc. Her mom would talk to her a bit but get back to her work and household chores. So the girl began to keep to herself and her books or internet and became withdrawn. Today both she and her parents regret why she did not get right guidance and quality time or support from parents in those days.

I am glad Ash is taking it slower and is not after faltu IIFA type functions. Things get more difficult in higher classes as workload increases and studies get tougher and child is also going through hormonal changes.

I am glad Ash is a hands on, involved mother and takes interest in Aaradhya's school, studies etc.

She was herself always accompanied by her mom wherever she went even in adulthood after becoming Miss World and superstar. So I guess she will be similar mom to Aaradhya and accompany her everywhere and be around her like a shadow or someone to instantly reach out to.

Nothing wrong with it.

I think Ash need not attend IIFA as it is a shit show anyway. She is looking older, bloated, overweight these days. Let her rest or take it easy during menopause. Why expect her to attend events or feed paps all the time?

Growing girl needs mother the most IMO.

I would appreciate Ash being with her and supporting her through her health and studies. Ash has achieved it all in her life. Now it is her time to help her daughter achieve something and build a strong foundation for herself.

Aaradhya is her only child and the attachment or concern and care for her are understandable.

Ash can return to awards or showbiz later if she wants. She is in demand anyway and did PS series recently or goes to Cannes. Being a famous person she can work as long as she wants just like Hema or MD or Rekha.

Why judge her for cutting down on faltu media appearances?

I remember MD had taken longish breaks when her boys were young. Why not Ash? Ash probably feels more protective and responsible towards Aaradhya as she is a girl, vulnerable, and her only child and only Bachchan heir.

I would rather like involved parents than negligent and callous types who leave child of transitional and crucial puberty or teen/adolescent years all by themselves or unmonitored or to unrestricted access to internet, TV, weirdos in social circle or friends or shady peers or media or predatory types waiting to take advantage.

Parents like Ash ensure their kids will be well raised and not land up in shady circles or parties or cruise.

Originally posted by: Lord_Voldemort

It was noteworthy you had nothing to say about Abhishek.

Abhishek hardly does many films or work.

He is also with Aaradhya a lot more compared to other dads.

Also, at this age, when girl is about to hit puberty, she needs mother a tad more than father and for different and understandable reasons. There are certain things only a female can share with another female and feel more comfortable in discussing or handling it as the older female has experience.

Same way, as a growing son needs a dad or father figure to discuss certain uncomfortable or awkward but crucial issues and changes.

Neither Aishwarya nor her husband owe any explanation to anybody regarding their decisions and choices..

However, the reason he has dished out seem so lame. Studies don't get hampered while the daughter tags along almost every other global outings, then?

While I understand the concept of hands on mom there is also a thing called 'space' which every adolescent needs in the same proportion as he or she needs care, attention and both covert and overt monitoring. Besides, there is also a concept of "sharing" duties between partners. Her husband can surely take up the responsibility for a few days along with a retinue of house helps.

Sorry. Ash has own choices. What if she does not want to attend IIFA as there are likes of Khans there?

She must have hated memes and edited videos made by fans showing Salman with her at Ambani event.

Also what is wrong if she is involved in studies or life of daughter or daughter is closer to her?

I myself hated being left to my dad or grandparents or uncles and was closer to mom and wanted her around. I respected my mom working but was not that close to anyone else the way I was to her.

It is easy for outsiders to say Abhishek can share duties but what if Aaradhya is closer to Ash? What if Ash is also closer to Aaradhya compared to anyone else and knows no one else can handle Aaradhya as well as she does? What if Ash herself wants Aaradhya to know she is around and there for her whenever she needs her?

As a mom it is her choice if she takes on more and does not always leave her daughter to servants or other relatives including her dad.

Abhishek does not seem to handle much of home or parenting IMO. In KWK interview he was saying women have to handle and welcome other woman and make her accepted in new house, indirectly putting it all on Jaya, Shweta and Ash to adjust and accept new changes after marriage and washing his own hands off as a husband or son to balance all relations.

Ash may have tried to talk to him but usually men wash their hands off or do shoddy job as parents or at home, which makes kids pine more for mom and makes woman also feel she would rather handle it herself.

Abhishek has seen his dad was never around and is still not around. His dad never knew which class he studied in. Abhishek and most men, have no idea of duty as dads.

Women deal with their weaponised incompetence or crankiness all time.

Ash knows if anything goes wrong or happens to Aaradhya, it is she who will be blamed for it as a mom.

Even kids blame mom for not guiding them earlier or make mom an easy scapegoat.

Aaradhya needs space, and I am sure Ash gives her space in private. Just because she holds hand in public events, it does not mean she does not give space.

Moms are usually protective of daughters. More so in showbiz. Hema always kept daughters with her and keeps close to them even after their marriages. Her mom also used to accompany her everywhere when she was young. Esha admits she also accompanies her kids same as her nani and mom did to her. Sridevi's mom also used to accompany her everywhere. Sridevi herself accompanied Jhanvi and Khushi everywhere when she was alive. Kajol accompanies Nysa a lot. And took long breaks when Nysa was young. Shweta Bachchan was always accompanied by Bachchans everywhere since childhood and still is and she in turn, accompanies Navya at most places. Babita would accompany Kapoor sisters everywhere when they were young. Ash's own mom accompanied her everywhere all life.

In showbiz and among public figures they know women are more vulnerable hence they feel need to accompany or be around. Nothing wrong with it. Madhuri's dad and/or brother would also accompany her everywhere when she was young. Sonakshi was always accompanied by her mom or brother or dad when she was young. Asin was accompanied by her dad all life even as an adult in every shooting and event.

The showbiz guys are aware of mobs, dangers and are different from others, hence more protective of women, compared to ordinary ones who get comparatively less unwanted attention from media, unknown people.