Manhandling & sorry - Page 9

Originally posted by: Fruitcustard_9

I agree what u r saying.

I should clear it no parents enjoy raising hand on thier kids but there is a difference b/w insulting someone & throwing a tantrum both things r not same .

Yes physical force is not answer to anything but everything can't be hided under tag of teenager also

I recently turned 32 so I had crossed d age of 18 & teenager period.

All teenager r not tantrum throwing queen or kings nor they keep insulting people in a flick of a moment, kuch teenagers grow up to early Coz of situation they face .

As a general practitioner I can tell you there are parents who think disciplining with physical force is the only answer and refuse to look for an alternate. There are abusive parents who enjoy the physical force.

There is no need hide things under teenager tag but calling them to task on the mistake they made and abusing them are two entirely different things.

Like you said not ALL. Each one is different, so the approach should differ accordingly and unless you are preventing a teenager from stabbing or shooting someone it does not require physical force .

It requires respectful , rational, level headed conversation.

Originally posted by: janecastle

I was not talking about you alone. I was talking about the general misconception people have that feminism is something negative. And in your initial post you clubbed together chauvinism and feminism, which is not right.

@bold- Empowerment simply means giving freedom to people to make their own choices and these movies are doing just that.

I was also talking about the general misconception in society. What many people perceives feminism these days. Thats why I clubbed it with chauvinism.

I understand your feelings and pov in that matter.

I want to disagree here. Empowerment has more comprehensive meaning not just freedom of choice. But in case you take it as freedom of choice also then also it should come from one own's preference and what is beneficial for them not just blindly following what society thinks as cool and great.

Thats the whole consipiracy of chauvinism. What women want to be in their life is defined by standards set by men.

For example every girl wants be slim, hot, happening, bold. For it they will go to any length. Be it starving themselves to be size zero, wearing uncomfortable tight clothes, smoking, drinking etc. Most of them dont prefer to do it otherwise but now have got habituated to it to maintain their so called image which was defined by men from the starting and they have been conditioned to feel like ita their own choice. And what is more terrible is that they go step aheas and mock other women who doesn't fall into that image created by men.

Originally posted by: UmIbrahim

If your lived experience has shown you the kind of Feminism that is oppressive to men then I won't dispute it.

That said a woman choosing her own partner, a woman having multiple partners , a woman smoking drinking, cursing are not oppressive to men. If men see this as oppressive it's simply because they see this as loss of power for themselves. Weak men fear truly independent women because while we respect our partners, acknowledge our flaws and strive to correct them, we also do not stand for men degrading us. We do not tolerate being shamed for our choices. We do not tolerate being shamed for our education/ skin/ bodies. We make mistakes and learn to deal with the consequences.

It is the said woman's choice to make and she should be allowed the same unfettered space to progress as we give men. She should be able to get as freely married as men who have had multiple past relations . She should have the choice to remain childless. She should've the choice to hire help at home and prioritize her work. She should've the freedom to travel alone, see the world alone and still be seen as someone fit to have a partner.

This.

Beautifully put :)

Its about equal opportunities

Whether we become the CEO or mother kids that's our choice .

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul

@bold a wrong is a wrong. It cant be labeled as more wrong or less wrong. For example if you give bribe of rs 500 to someone to get your work done and if anyone gives bribe of rs 5000 for that same then it cant be said that you were less wrong and other person was more wrong because a bribe is a bribe. Further one wrong act provokes a wrong reaction from other. Its a never ending cycle.

@red. Well, thats the problem. If she does this and is criticised for it then I'll be happy but I know this after seeing the current trend that it will not be the case because whatever sai does is taken lightly and get brushed under the carpet. i may be wrong because I am not a very active member of this forum but whatever I have seen, its my observation.

@ blue. Same goes with sai. She is a medical student who is supposed to be more attentive more vigilant in case of a mentally challenged person and not jump towards her own unscientific conclusions that getting her married will cure her problems. She is also a daughter of police officer so she should at least has basic knowledge that a person of unsound mind cant give consent to a marriage. Her legal gaurdian must take that decison. In its absence getting a mentally challenged person mardied to someone is punishable offence. And a crime like kidnapping should not be hidden like nothing happened.

It will be better if we dont go into the profession of the leads because they both are useless on that front.

@pink. Now this statement has an answer in itself. Virat is repenting sincerely. Now ideally a wife should not go back to the husband who has abused her physically but sai will go back to him and even forgive him because she will choose to believe that virat is a good person and is regretting his behavior.

@green. Agree word to word. In real world people are far more sensible than these characters.

@bold- Well there is definitely different degree in wrongs. You cannot have the same consequence for different wrongs. A robber cannot be given the same punishment as a murderer. And one wrong cannot really provoke another wrong. An eye for an eye is not the solution for anything. And Sai's actions cannot justify Virat's behavior. That is like saying that a man slapped his wife because she didn't listen to him. Nothing gives Virat the right to manhandle Sai or deny her something basic like food or shelter. That is inhuman behavior and there's on justification for it.

@red- Well Sai hasn't done anything that grave till date. So let's wait till then to pass judgements on how the people will criticize her or not. Till date, Sai does get called out for her impulsive and unruly behavior. Most of the people here are sensible enough to call out the wrongs done by the leads. None of them gets away with doing something wrong. Since, Virat's mistakes are more wrong, he gets called out more. Otherwise both the leads are criticized whenever they make a mistake.

@blue- What Sai did in Devi's case is another debate altogether and I don't necessarily support Sai's actions in that matter. I brought in Virat's profession because the post was about his behavior towards Sai and his profession does make his actions look even more wrong. But like you said, both of them are useless in their respective professions. So let's leave it at that.

@pink- Since this is a TV show, everything will be forgiven and forgotten sooner or later. And Sai will go back to Virat since they are leads and the show can't go one without them. Personally, I would have felt much better if they didn't make Virat do all these inhuman things. That makes it very difficult to connect with the character later.

@green- I don't usually compare ITV leads with real people because it is absolutely absurd. ITV has a whole different criteria about relationships, emotions, right and wrong. So for our on sanity, it is better not take any of these things really seriously. But I do understand why some people will feel otherwise. Many things shown can be really disturbing to some people and they have every right to criticize it.

Originally posted by: Dvanshi123

This.

Beautifully put :)

Its about equal opportunities

Whether we become the CEO or mother kids that's our choice .

I agree, we shouldn't need permission to do things just because of our gender.❤️

If we lack the qualities or the route is disputed, then that is another matter, but choices shouldn't need permission just cuz I am a female.

Originally posted by: UmIbrahim

If your lived experience has shown you the kind of Feminism that is oppressive to men then I won't dispute it.

That said a woman choosing her own partner, a woman having multiple partners , a woman smoking drinking, cursing are not oppressive to men. If men see this as oppressive it's simply because they see this as loss of power for themselves. Weak men fear truly independent women because while we respect our partners, acknowledge our flaws and strive to correct them, we also do not stand for men degrading us. We do not tolerate being shamed for our choices. We do not tolerate being shamed for our education/ skin/ bodies. We make mistakes and learn to deal with the consequences.

It is the said woman's choice to make and she should be allowed the same unfettered space to progress as we give men. She should be able to get as freely married as men who have had multiple past relations . She should have the choice to remain childless. She should've the choice to hire help at home and prioritize her work. She should've the freedom to travel alone, see the world alone and still be seen as someone fit to have a partner.

@bold yes due the nature of my job i have seen and keep seeing such cases frequently.

This world has every kind of persons. Not all are as sensible and sensitive as you. There are women who are literally diagrace in the name of women and there are men who are literally makes us proud on them.

@red totally agree with this. Men and women should be judged on same parameters. There shouldn't be different rules for them. Hope one day we as a society can bring this change

Originally posted by: Fruitcustard_9

I agree what u r saying.

I should clear it no parents enjoy raising hand on thier kids but there is a difference b/w insulting someone & throwing a tantrum both things r not same .

Yes physical force is not answer to anything but everything can't be hided under tag of teenager also

I recently turned 32 so I had crossed d age of 18 & teenager period.

All teenager r not tantrum throwing queen or kings nor they keep insulting people in a flick of a moment, kuch teenagers grow up to early Coz of situation they face .

Being there done that.

Its heartbreaking when teenagers are required to grow up coz their circumstances demand .

All kids / teenagers should enjoy their time .

Aage chalke burden toh waise hi aana hai

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul

I was also talking about the general misconception in society. What many people perceives feminism these days. Thats why I clubbed it with chauvinism.

I understand your feelings and pov in that matter.

I want to disagree here. Empowerment has more comprehensive meaning not just freedom of choice. But in case you take it as freedom of choice also then also it should come from one own's preference and what is beneficial for them not just blindly following what society thinks as cool and great.

Thats the whole consipiracy of chauvinism. What women want to be in their life is defined by standards set by men.

For example every girl wants be slim, hot, happening, bold. For it they will go to any length. Be it starving themselves to be size zero, wearing uncomfortable tight clothes, smoking, drinking etc. Most of them dont prefer to do it otherwise but now have got habituated to it to maintain their so called image which was defined by men from the starting and they have been conditioned to feel like ita their own choice. And what is more terrible is that they go step aheas and mock other women who doesn't fall into that image created by men.

Yes empowerment do have more deeper meanings. And a number of movies do show that. So I will say that there is a balance in it.

@bold- All these boil down to personal choices. There are no set rules about what is cool and what is not. Different people perceive it in different ways and that is an individual choice. Not every girl want to be slim or hot. Just like not every boy think that smoking or drinking is cool. All of these are personal preferences.

@red- All these are generalizations. Not everyone act or think this way.

Originally posted by: Bechain_Bulbul

Chauvinism and feminism, both are extreme thought processes.

One cant be a reply to another

World always require balanced approach.

See the point is feminism as a concept cannot be equated to Chauvinism.. Like you said in one of your posts, the aftereffect though is problematic.

Feminism though, I agree has become pseudo just like a lot of other concepts like Nationalism and religion have become.. Happens with all good movements.. We all know genuine dowry cases are not reported more but the fake ones are reported more.. But then the movement in itself was not wrong... The core belief of the movement is not wrong, how its taken is wrong.. While in case of chauvinism the core belief itself is wrong. So we cannot equate the two.. We need to understand feminism in its true sense before calling it extreme. Chauvinism by definition is extreme.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

See the point is feminism as a concept cannot be equated to Chauvinism.. like you said in one of your posts.. Feminism though is pseudo just like a lot of other concepts like Nationalism and religion have gone.. Happens with all good movements.. We all know genuine dowry cases are reported more than the real ones.. But then the movement in itself was not wrong... The core belief of the movement is not wrong, how its taken is wrong.. While in case of chauvinism the core belief itself is wrong. So we cannot equate the two.. We need to understand feminism in its true sense before calling it extreme. Chauvinism by definition is extreme.

Pardon but i have explained my pov about that statement in many posts now. So kindly refer to that. I am tired now, i wont be answering or explaining one thing again and again😆

Sorry, no hard feelings, i hope you understand, peace out.