can marriage survive an affair?

Originally posted by: lailaMai

Outcome studies indicate that couples who save their marriage after infidelity report the highest satisfaction levels of their mutual history. With time, both partners can forgive without forgetting, trust can be rebuilt, respect can be restored and love can be rekindled.

Originally posted by: _Lord.of.Light_

@ Blue : makes sense .. if a person can forgive infidelity , there is very little that this person can have a problem with .i.e. a happy marriage .. however , very few can ever look beyond infidelity .. and even fewer end the marriage over infidelity for the sake of kids , relatives , society etc ( I am talking about Indian scenario here ) .. but the marriage in the true sense is already over without a legal divorce .. i don't see the point in 'enduring' each other like that .. may be everyone involved will be better off without the burdened marriage ..

@ Pink : "Trust " once lost is almost impossible to rebuild .. same goes for 'respect' and 'love' .. one would require an almost godly/saintly/non-human 'emotional quotient' to achieve that feat ..

Originally posted by: lailaMai

there can be many reasons to be in a marriage after infidelity for eg

what if it happened because of a long distance marriage i.e working in different cities or countries

just a one time with your friend/workmate in spur of the moment which you can't seem to get rid of but want to, some people can be very manipulating!

Doesnt excuse infidelity .. not even in the slightest manner .. if one lets himself/herself be 'manipulated' like that , it clearly shows the kind of respect that they have for the sanctity of marriage .. if the person was very clear about his/her own marital status , the question of 'manipulation' itself is invalid .. consenting to sex outside of marriage invalidates 'manipulation' .. 'consent' being the key word here .. if one gets blackmailed or coerced into having sex outside of marriage , then it doesnt count as 'infidelity' , it is a whole different issue altogether ..

That being said , long distance relationships/marriages can be extremely difficult .. especially if it is an arranged marriage , people will stick around no matter what ..

and according to me you can't rebuild love ..if you truely love that person your heart will break but you don't stop caring you stop respecting and trusting,care and emotions for that person stays .

Well emotions cant be quantified .. which is why such matters can get messy .. IMO there is no point in staying in a relationship where there is no respect or trust .. the very foundation of a relationship cracks when trust is broken .. where there is no trust , there is no relationship .. true, you cant just stop caring for the other person even when your trust gets broken .. but thats a very personal journey that one must undertake - it is called 'dealing with heartache' .. eventually , provided that you allow it , things will get better ..

May be they are strong enough to forgive and rebuild the trust which i also think is very hard but not impossible,depends on the cheater too how he/she deals with it

some people are jerks and take advantage of such people once forgiven.

so i guess it is a chance you can take once if you really love a person with therapy..

Strong enough or foolish enough - again , very subjective .. but even if the person never cheats again , the broken trust will eventually turn the relationship into a claustrophobic nightmare ..

bdw in india where i come from no one stays in a marriage for kids or society anymore the world is changing my friend!!but i agree their are still people here who stay in a marriage for these reasons😊.when you have kids with someone your relationship is at a whole different level and love too which one can only undertand when you are in their shoes.i think they should part and not stay together for the sake of their kids if it's more then a one time affair,it can affect the kids negatiely and who knows they turn out to be like either of their parents coz that is what they have seen and, it will be their defination of normal,normal relationships.

So , ultimately it is better for everyone involved (including the kids) if such marriages are ended for good..

Originally posted by: _Lord.of.Light_

Originally posted by: lailaMai

Most people literally fall into them. It is so exhilarating he/she hates to leave it behind. You start to save conversational topics for this relationship that you don't share with your spouse - you used to share them, but now you save them for the friendship. You start nourishing the friendship and starving the marriage.

Over time couples are prone to forget why they fell in love. In our easy-come-easy-go culture, it takes courage and determination to honor commitment instead of convenience.

CAN A MARRIAGE SURVIVE INFIDELITY?

Originally posted by: qwertyesque

Can you seek answers to personal problems here!!!???😆😆