Originally posted by: maaloo
Gan.. 🤗 WORD!!! Lovely post as usual.. and I hear ya.. loud and clear.
I hate to rant too, constantly, and these past few days.. I realized that I had only rants and grievances that I totally stopped commenting in the thread and dampen the proceedings with additional rants.. and hoping fervently for it to pick up so that I can stop ranting and start raving about the show as i used to before. Like you mentioned, the entertainment value is gone.. nada.. zilch.. kaput..
One of the reasons that I started watching YHM was because of the fact that I could relate to it. Relate to Raman.. relate to Ishita.. relate to Simmi.. relate to Ruhi.. dang.. I could even relate to Shagun!! I could put myself in their shoes and could justify their actions.. to a certain extent.
Raman .. a totally broken man, who realizes that his seemingly perfect marriage was nothing but a mirage, accepting that his wife whom he idolized has feet of clay, coming back with a vengeance, bitter and broken, but taking on life head on, and testing the new "woman" in his life to the utmost to see if she breaks, regaining his trust in women, realizing that his wife is his strength..accepting that he loves her as she makes his home .. a haven. This entire character graph has a lot of growth.. though there are lots of dips in the graph, it always showed growth.
Ishita .. a person who was left at the altar, so to speak, because of limitations which was totally out of her control, compassionate and still not bitter and taking life head on, lived life by her values, feisty but still very loving and ready to compromise to a situation so that the family doesn't suffer.. generous and giving.. Again another character who made wrong calls and mistakes more because of her naivety and belief that people are more good than evil, and willing to accept that it was situations that made a person act the way they did.
Shagun..the narcissistic person, who felt she deserved more than what she got in her marriage with Raman, and when opportunity arose she moved on to greener pastures not caring about the trauma or the havoc that she left behind.. and that included an infant girl. She was a classic case of narcissistic personality disorder and believed that she deserved the best at any cost.
I could go on and on and on about each and every character which were neither white nor black and on an average all had grayish undertones.. And this is what attracted me to the show in the first place..
In each kaand.. i could relate to the reaction by the character whether it was a right one or not. During param kaand, it was not that Raman did not believe in Ishita but he reacted as a brother, not knowing what to do in a situation wherein his sister could be left heartbroken. He didn't want to be seen as the husband who took his wife's side without giving a fair hearing to his sister.. but on gaining proof that Param was wrong he realizes that it was not about his wife or sister but about letting a person like Param go free. And Ishita was reacting to the crime as a person..and that no person no matter what the situation/relation is, should be made to suffer such indignity on oneself, and keeping silent only encourages such baddies like Param to be more powerful to hurt others. And Simmi was reacting as a wife who totally trusted her husband and could not believe that her husband could do something so bad.. and also at the same time failing to accept the reality that the earth was shifting beneath her feet and she was trying to stay afloat by clinging on to her "vishwas".. that her husband could not cheat her.. or do the things that he was accused of, because after all said and done he claimed to love her and she loved him.. so what was the need for him to stray.. the classic case of disbelief or rather scared to doubt because that would mean that her vishwas was wrong .. her judgement was wrong.. and how could that be.. so it was better to challenge it than to question her judgement..
During amma's accident, i could relate to a father who wanted to protect his son from going to jail.. at the cost of doing stuff totally against his grain, more because he believed that his son was the one who was affected by his divorce and he felt guilty about having put his kids' through that trauma that he didn't want to inflict more trauma on them.. so he did what he did.. even though he knew in his heart that it was not right. Ishita on the other hand believed that guilty should be punished and rightly so too.. and is upset thinking Raman was protecting his ex-wife but backs off once she realizes that its her step-son .. and leaves it upto the parent to decide what to do about it.. as it was the parents' decision to make..
During Mani track, I could relate to Ishita..who knew that her husband was slightly jealous of her friendship with mani, and initially flaunts it just to make him realize his love for her and accept it and not to really make him jealous. She was confident of her friendship and in her eyes they were the best friends so she couldnt understand why anybody should mistake their friendship.. And Raman reacted like a jealous husband, not believing that a male and a female could be just friends.. and he viewed everything through the eyes of the green-eyed monster, and couldn't stand the thought of losing his new found love to another man who was in her life as a friend.. and on the award night, everything in his head came to a boiling point and helped with a few drinks, to make him lose it, and he tried to physically get his wife to accept that he is "the man". Not that it was right thing to do and that I approve of it.. but yes, i could understand where he is coming from.
I am not sadistic to want to see a man on his knees begging forgiveness from his wife for his mistakes or crying with remorse all the time, or to be dominated by his wife.. nor am i a feminist who believes that women are a better species and are superior .
I would rather see them as equals who approach an issue with some logic and resolve it.. and yes.. having come thus far in their relation .. to communicate with each other.. because that was something that was lacking and led to all the mis-understanding in all their previous issues.
But come December, the whole color palette changed and the balance was totally disturbed. The CVs thought the gray was not a color and went about painting their character's either black or white, and making the vamp, the hero in the story.
All the issues that they dealt with are real ones.. children's mental trauma in dirty custody battles, depression among kids, possessiveness for a child, heck even the rant about GKC, all are valid issues..but the way they are going about depicting them is all wrong. And that's where I have a problem. I could understand as a parent, what Adi is going through and Ruhi is going through but then being the same parent, i dont think I would do what Raman is doing or Ishita is doing .. or even what Shagun is doing.. and that for me has been the crux of the problem.. not being able to relate to anything.
And I loved the way you said how you saw DIVAN in the last romantic scene and the power of their acting but still they failed to convince you that it was an ISHRA romantic scene.. (I haven't watched it btw, I stopped watching sometime last week.. but still do read the updates.. ) There .. that itself is, according to me, half the battle lost on the part of the CVs.. the ability to convince the viewers in their story.
I hope the CVs realize that and do something about it.. And realize that the success of their story telling is in the number of viewers that want to stick with the show and deliberate about the happenings in the show .. reason things out and thus discuss openly about social issues and possibly go about promoting the right way out of these social issues and cliched situations, and not in the number of those who just play the show in background not caring for the story and ready to switch channels when another one comes along.. A story becomes epic when it will be remembered even after the curtains are drawn not when it will be forgotten and trashed even before the last scene is played out..
Phew.. that was long one Gan.. not my intention at all when I started with the first line but then I just couldn't stop it mid-steam..😆
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