Chapter 10 : I was wrong
Palkon pe aansoo ko sajaya na jaa saka,
Usko bhi Dil ka haal bataya na jaa saka,
Zakhmon se choor choor tha yeh Dil mera,
Ek zakham bhi usko dikhaya na jaa saka,
Jab teri yaad aayi to koshish ke bawajood,
Aankhon mein aansoon ko chupaya na jaa saka,
Kuch log zindagi mein aise bhi aaye hai,
Jinko kisi bhi lamhe bhulaya na jaa saka,
Bas is khayaal se kahi usko dukh na ho,
Humse to haal-e-gum bhi sunaya na jaa saka,
Woh muskura raha tha mere ru-ba-ru magar,
Chehre ka rang usse chupaya na jaa saka,
Tanhaiyon ki aag mein hum jal gaye,
Magar faasla DILO ka mitaya na jaa saka..!!!
Asad closed the laptop in frustration as the shayari he just read started haunting him. It reminded him of her, his Zoya. His? Was she his anymore? He doesn't know. All he knows that for the past 2 months, without Zoya besides him, he was just living the life, not loving the life. 2 months! Exactly 2 months have passed from that dreadful day. Exactly 2 months that he last saw Zoya.
He never went back to see her. It's not because he forgot her. But it's because he know the gravity of the mistake he had done. He knew that no matter what he say for his defense, whatever he done was terribly wrong. He was afraid to face Zoya after the pain he had caused to her. Moreover he was afraid to see her heart broken.
There was not even a single day in these 2 months Asad didn't think about her. His very existence was plagued by her thoughts. He knew his love for her had grown much after he departed from her. If he loved her soo much, why did he break her heart? Was the reason he had was worth breaking her love? The same question haunted him every day and night.
Thinking about the reason itself made him sad. Did he achieve what he wanted even after going through all these? The answer would be No'. For any outsiders Asad cheated Zoya only to get his promotion. But the reality was much different than that. Being the intelligent and sensitive guy he always was, Asad knew, more than reasons the actions matter and his actions have caused a lot of pain to Zoya and himself.
A tear rolled down his cheek as he remembered about his Zoya. He walked towards the drawer and fished out an envelope. He walked back to his bed and opened the envelope. A pile of Zoya's photographs dated different days in past 2 months came from within. Scattering those photographs in the bed, he laid back popping his head with the support of elbow. He fingered through each photo savouring her face.
For the world Asad was a cheater, a merciless pervert who destroyed a beautiful girl's life for his career. But truth to be told, he was nothing of that. He wasn't a cheater in love; instead he was a victim in love. He wasn't a merciless pervert who destroyed a beautiful girl's life; instead he was a sensitive man who broke his own heart for love.
Even though Asad didn't go to meet her for past 2 months, his careful eyes were always directed towards her. With the help of Prasad, a fatherly figure and the most trustworthy man Asad has ever seen, he was looking after each and every movement of Zoya. Every day Prasad will come back to him with a pile of photographs he had captured of Zoya's and whatever she had done that day. Asad knew he can't be with her to take care so instead he sent an angel in disguise to help his Zoya, to care for her.
Looking through her photographs was not an easy task for him as she looked soo lifeless in those. It always took his all will power to stop himself from running back to her and pull her to his arms. But he was scared, scared of the unknown, scared of the rejection. He was dreading for the moment he will come face to face with her. Will she forgive him ever?
***(@)***
And that moment came. The moment where he has to face Zoya...
Asad was running around in his office searching for an important file. His cell phone rang again flashing Dad calling'. His worry increased as he picked up the phone with trembling hands. From the other side he could hear an impatient voice.
"ASAD... Did you get the document? What the hell are you doing there moping around? I told you to get the document"
"woh... I am still search..searching it... I will... get it soon. Don't worry dad..."
"You are a good for nothing son. I don't know why I agreed to your mom when she told she want a baby. You proved yourself useless all the time"
"Dad... I..."
"I don't want to hear anything. I need the document within 3 hours... 3hours..."
And the call was cut. Asad slumped down to his chair, sighing heavily. His fingers found their way to his forehead, massaging. He was deep in his thoughts when his gaze fell onto Zoya's photo that was peeping from his drawer. With a jolt he realized that he had kept that important file in her home, when he was living there. He cursed his bad luck under his breath as now he has to go to her home to get it back. Time for the much awaited confrontation!
***(@)***
Once again Zoya sat in her studio to mold the clay. As soon as her fingers touched the clay, that special night's memory came flooding back to her. The way he intertwined their fingers together, the way he kissed her, molded his body to hers and the way he made love to her... Even after 2 months of loneliness and betrayal still her heart is not able to hate him. If it would have been her mind's way, she would have shut the chapter of Asad Ahemed Khan from her life forever. But when did mind start winning in front of heart in the matter of love? So there she is, sitting in her studio for another attempt to start over which is already failed from the start.
Shaking herself out of his thoughts she started concentrating on the work in hand. That was when she heard the calling bell rang. She frowned in confusion as she rarely has visitors after he is gone. Gathering herself up, she went to the door and opened.
On the other hand, Asad was having a hard time controlling his nerves. He could hear the footsteps inside indicating her being near. And when the door opened, an involuntary gasp escaped his lips. The bubbly and chirpy Zoya that he had known was no longer there. The new Zoya infront of him was pale; her beautiful doe eyes had dark circles around it, the depth in her eyes replaced with hollowness. She just looked like a living dead.
"Zoya..."
He saw the myriad of expressions in her face as he called her name- shock, happiness, hope, sadness, betrayal and anger. He saw the tears brimming in her eyes. It pinched his heart. He so wanted to wipe those tears away. But he knew he had lost that right long back. He cleared his throat hoping against hope that she won't lash out on him.
"Woh... main... I had kept some files here. I came to retrieve that..."
He was caught off guard when Zoya stepped aside paving him the way to enter the house. He had expected her to shout at him and demand explanations but he never expected her to be silent with him.
Sighing deeply, he walked towards the room which was once his. He remembered the moment he and Zoya shared in that room. Those were the most beautiful moments of his life. As the initial feeling of missing went away, his senses became alert as he closely scrutinized the room.
He could smell Zoya in that room. He looked toward his bed which was crumpled and one of his shirts was laying there. Stealthily he made his way towards her room. It looked like no one has slept there in ages. Painfully he realized that Zoya was sleeping in his room hugging his shirt. He was confused as to whether to be happy or sad with these revelations. He was happy because he knew, deep down Zoya still loves him. He was sad because he knows, he doesn't have what it takes to be her love anymore...
He was broken out of his revere by Zoya's sudden yelp. He ran to the living room and saw Zoya sitting on the floor clutching her ankle.
He knelt down in front of her and tried to hold her leg. She rudely pulled herself out of grip. But he didn't let her do that. Not listening to her, he again took her leg in his hands and rolled of her pants till her thigh. He gasped seeing the sight infront of him. There were brown, black and bluish marks all over her leg. Some were fresh and some were not. He ran his hands over those marks while she flinched with pain and anger.
"Zoya... yeh sab..."
"When you clearly knew that you won't be there forever to catch me if I fall, why did you change my house just like you changed my life?"
And that made the reality hit him hard. He painfully realized that she had tripped and fell down many times in last two months because he rearranged her home, her furniture just like he changed her life. If before he was feeling guilty for whatever he had done, now he was feeling worse, he felt like a murderer, a murderer of feelings. A murderer, that's what he is. He murdered his own feelings along with hers for love, a love which was never meant to be his.
PS: If i am offending anyone with the way Asad's character is shaping up, i am sorry. i just need to tell you that, he is not evil. he will never be😳 now its time for your comments. make sure to comment more and dont let that laziness in me to overcome the urge to write more😳
Bigg Boss 19
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
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