Originally posted by: malikakas
I don't know.
I think he has the ability to be a good husband. But right now the way he is acting I don't think he would be any better than last time. And last time he was a terrible husband. I personally would never go back to him if I were Meher. Yeah he has a good heart but he is incredibly selfish.
You wrote: I would be the most happiest if I can get someone like that who keeps my interests and myself as the topmost priority...But he doesn't do that. And that's been my whole issue with him. Meher's interests were in fulfilling her responsibilities. He knew that before he married her and promised to help her. He made so many promises that he never kept.
Did he ever do anything to help her responsibilities? Did he wake up in the morning and make her breakfast, did he give her coffee at night when she was working on her presentation? Did he start working to provide money for her? Far from making her life easier, he made it so much harder.
The problem is that Abeer says whatever needs to be said to get what he wants but he doesn't even bother living up to it. And he hasn't changed.
He told Meher he would do anything she wants but he once again is back to acting like a jerk trying to hurt her because he's been hurt. Meher was hurt when he insulted her at her birthday party but she didn't try take revenge. She tried to fix the root of his frustration by quitting her job. That's the kind of behaviour I want to see from Abeer. Not just making Meher's life difficult because he isn't getting what HE wants.
Its easy to say you love someone but its only when you are able to compromise your desires to respect what they want is when you prove that love. At this point Abeer just looks like he wants Meher as some sort of trophy. He has no concern for her emotional state.
If Abeer truly was sorry about how he treated her in the past he would accept her saying no to him as a consequence of his actions and not be angry about it. And not keep trying to push her or beg her. He would've respected her wishes.
And certainly wouldn't have used Akshat's car as a washroom. What had Akshat done to him at that point in time? Stood by and supported the woman he claims to love for 8 years without getting love in return. Abeer couldn't support Meher for a month and he thinks he is better than Akshat?
The problem with the way he is acting is that Akshat is coming off as the better person. He probably isn't but Abeer is not showing himself as a good person. At some point I want to see Abeer respect Bua and Akshat for looking after his family for so long when in the same position he ran away.
Abeer needs to think about what is in Meher's and Ishaan's best interests and put aside his own needs to do what is right for them.
At this point I think Abeer needs to go through a phase where he realizes the value of a person like Akshat. Meher can trust him to pick up Ishaan from school. Remember when she trusted Abeer to pick up her mom and he got drunk. Nissar manipulated him but Abeer should know his responsibilities and limits. And he hasn't changed. Look how easily Akshat got him drunk in the middle of the day when he knew he had a press conference. What if one day he was with a fan who wanted to get him drunk and he had to pick up Ishaan? Would Abeer stop on his own? Would he drink and drive with Ishaan in the car?
Abeer needs to take a good look at himself.
Well I appreciate your opinion but you are missing one big point here...Meher is marrying Akshat in a few days and is going to be doomed along with her son Ishaan...If you compare Akshat and ABeer then definitely Abeer is a better guy. He knows how to respect women unlike Akshat who tried to molest Alia just to prove his point...
Sometimes, when I was a kid I used to not take medicines when I was ill..I would never listen to my parents kind words to take medicine... So my parents used to threaten me to take medicines else they would beat me... Was that a selfish motive ?? Does that mean they do not love me or not keep my interests as their top priority??Its the same situation here... Meher is being stubborn for whatever reasons and is going to marry Akshat... Akshat is not a good guy which Abeer knows very well... So he has to threaten her so that she does not marry Akshat and in this way he can save his wife and child... It is not a zidd to make Meher listen to him or something... It is a zidd to save his child and wife which is totally justified...He does not want to prove himself right... He has already accepted in front of everyone that Meher is the wiser one...He has already accepted he's immature / impulsive but he knows very well that Akshat is not a good person either...I am not saying Abeer is the best person on earth but he is definitely better than Akshat because he knows how to respect a woman... A guy who does not know how to respect women can never make a good husband/father according to me no matter how good he is in other stuff ...This is my POV...
You said - If Abeer truly was sorry about how he treated her in the past he would accept her saying no to him as a consequence of his actions and not be angry about it. And not keep trying to push her or beg her. He would've respected her wishes. That's the kind of behaviour I want to see from Abeer. Not just making Meher's life difficult because he isn't getting what HE wants
At this point if he just says Meher I am at fault and I respect whatever you do.. Meher will marry Akshat and Akshat would become Ishaan's legal father... This would affect not only Meher but also Ishaan...Hence the only option left for Abeer to save his wife and child is to threaten them... He is not going to tell Ishaan about his parentage anyway... He's only threatening them.. If you see the episode clearly he winks at SUman to tell her that he's only joking and he has no intention of doing anything like that...If AKshat was not there in the picture I am sure he would have behaved differently...
You said- Abeer needs to think about what is in Meher's and Ishaan's best interests and put aside his own needs to do what is right for them.
That is exactly what Abeer is doing... He is dropping his ego and trying to save his son and wife despite being insulted many times...He would not have saved Meher from pinky Bhai or Tunnu if he was thinking only about himself or being selfish...
You said - Its easy to say you love someone but its only when you are able to compromise your desires to respect what they want is when you prove that love. At this point Abeer just looks like he wants Meher as some sort of trophy. He has no concern for her emotional state.
If Abeer really wanted Meher as a trophy he need not wait for 8 long years...He could have had many such trophies by now... Its his pure love towards Meher which Meher fails to understand... Forgiveness is the base of any relationship.. I am sure even our parents would have had ego clashes at many points in their life but they would have forgiven each other to take the relationship forward...
The problem is when a person does 100 things right, nobody remembers or notices him...But when he makes a small mistake everybody wants to point and punish and hang him to death...
Edited by cool_kriti - 9 years ago
