Great topic Kalapi...:) It is good to discuss something else other than Purvi and her endless kaands :P It is getting tiring to repeat same old arguments again and again..she is beyond redemption and none of us could care less if she dies in a car accident on the show or runs away with a handsome stranger leaving both Onir and Arjun behind..:P
Kools, Kalapi, Varsha Di, hilly, Julie fantastic posts :) Loved reading them...reading about lust first thing in the morning..ahhaha
Hilly, loved your post on Onir and what lust means to him and how a woman perceives him versus Arjun.
My take is, lust is simply pure physical attraction. This can be with some hot guy/girl across you at the bar, where he/she is so physically attractive, one wants to go kiss him/her or more. There is no need here to know the person, or like them for their personality. Heck, one need not even make conversation in this case. 😆 That is the main point behind one night stands, random hook ups and flings. Other than alcohol ofcourse. :P Alcohol only gives one the disinhibition to go for it, but lust is a feeling that happens naturally just like love.
That is pure basic human feeling, just as pure as love is. I agree with Kools that lust is not negative at all and with Varsha di that you may lust for a person but it may not lead to love and if you love a person. you obviously lust for them.
Lust and love both need to be controlled depending on situations and the person across you. That is why human beings are gifted the ability for thinking. They don't mate randomly and they know how to think things through in a norm based society. If there were no social norms against pre-marital sex, we would have hundreds of babies without fathers and a proper family. If there were no social norms, you could pretty much hook up with any one and everyone at the bar and make babies with each guy...no concept of marriage, or commitment would be needed. Saying this in context with some random posts talking about moral codes and broad mindedness and why any society has norms. It is for curbing the raw desires in human beings, like sex and aggression which can be negative if not controlled by societal norms and laws.
Arjun- I agree with EVERYONE on what makes him tick with Purvi. The Canadian brought up aggressive and arrogant boy has never had a woman stand up to him like that. If you notice, he is shown to not have ANY friends in Canada besides Ovi and Sachin and Teju. Now Teju could care less about him, but Ovi has always given in to him, always treated him like god and given him the support his arrogance and ego needed. So Purvi being this wildfire giving him back and caring two hoots about his handsome and amazing self, was absolute Indian novelty. Plus, her new age sanskaars and middle class bhashans was also novelty to a boy who has not had any such exposure to such a lifestyle before. Her reluctance at his advances, her backing off on his physical moves at her, her high handed attitude about her sanskaari pavitra self was all very charming to our boy. He saw challenge. I love the reference to men are hunters. It is an adrenaline rush for men to conquer what is difficult. Whether it is empires or women, it is a basic sense in men. So his boyishness led him to feel attracted to purvi and then love happened...The pre-marital sex was all a lust combined with love thing where the woman he loves was wet in the rains and alone in a shack...
Now for his deal with Ovi, I think you NEED to have some kind of attraction to have sex. To be that intimate with someone, you've got to feel some kind of attraction that turns you on. Unless he was being a creep and lowlife by imagining purvi while doing it with ovi...That itself over-rides his basic character and makes him a degraded man. But, I think all the past instances where he showed jealousy, agreed to marry her earlier, stayed in this marriage and had a pretty loving rain dance and sex and morning after was pleasant for him...shows that he has some attraction towards ovi..it may not be love, but it definitely is a sort of comfortable feeling for him to be around her...She shares his childhood and a lot more memories than purvi could have shared in the 6 months that they fooled around...Ovi is like daal and purvi is like biryani, but a man wants both. A lot of men who lust outside of marriage, because their wife is growing older, or the secretary is so much more younger and attractive..For arjun, it is opposite, he loves purvi, but his wife is the attractive, and the more ego-massaging woman all men want too...so he lusts inside his house, while he loves outside...:P
If physical attraction or nothing was needed to have sex, then why hasn't purvi gone ahead with onir yet? She should also fulfill patni duties with onir, like some suggest that arjun is only fulfilling marital duties by having sex with ovi..That is the single most foolish thing I have heard.
Onir, is obviously way more mature than Arjun, and also with that maturity comes a lot of patience and tolerance that Arjun lacks. Onir has given Purvi the space and time to "feel" it before haq jamaoing..This is because he does not just lust for Purvi, but loves her too. That is why he wants her to feel comfortable and as attracted to him for having sex, as he is to her. That kind of men are rare and it is only amazing that he has waited so long. He may be sly about it too, as he knows exactly what is making her feel the heat and this is this exactly, his silence and patience...Now she is feeling jealous and playing her patni dharm, because he has made her want him patiently...If Arjun's so called Sherlock giri falls flat, I see Purvi falling for Onir and finally giving in to him too...She is not happy with the idea of sharing him with another woman and this attachment and jealousy is first step in love and love obviously leads to lust.
I don't think Purvi ever loved Arjun. It was easy enough to fathom the idea of him with her sister and with him having sex also with her sister. She never felt uncomfortable with the idea and saying it out loud. She never showed much jealousy or feeling bad when Arjun-Ovi had their marital talks or whatever. Arjun shows that jealousy when Purvi is talking to Onir, as so many episodes have shown. Purvi has never shown this attachment to Arjun that she is showing towards Onir right now. Maybe it is Onir who has taught her what love is.
Haa, I think I have simply re-iterated what everyone said..Too lazy to edit post..sorry for the rant guys :)
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