Kool's Commentary 5 ; May 13 PR - Page 23

Originally posted by: salvatore-nina

I heard Purvi and Arjun will be taking the first step to reunite in QH-PR mahasangam. And that Zoya will convince them to. 🤢

Originally posted by: JulieD

Loving someone doesn't necessary mean you are lusting after them {think Onir's platonic love for Purvi here😆}. There could be many reasons why you love a person and want to marry them. This topic is so broad really.

Depends also on an individual's sex drive. While some may want to have sex all the time, others may be okay with twice or three times a week. Then there is the type of sex to consider, like kinky, gentle or rough.

Generally men would have sex with women outside of a relationship, this is where the wild kind comes in and then when they are choosing their wife, they would go for the innocent virgin girl who is most probably gentle type.

See Julie, I think even in those infrequent sex between mature couples😆, which is actually true for most longtime couples, sex will involve lust or if you want to call it more romantically, passion😆. Yes, it is true, men could probably modulate the level of roughness depending on the woman he is engaging in that act, so for virgins, maybe gentle - but, sure that lust/passion will be there. I personally lust and passion describes probably the same emotion, with the connotation being different - one a positive and the other negative undertone😆

With Arjun, he was jealous of the guy making a pass at Ovi and proposed marriage to her, implying his need to protect HIS woman from other men. The love was there. Almost like he was playing the fields and sowing some oats with the knowledge that Ovi was always waiting in the wings for him.

Purvi on the other hand was as Varsha said a novelty and he got caught up in that.

But then I remember he had wanted to tell Ovi about Purvi before she surprised him by coming to India. Does that mean he had fallen in love or lust with Purvi? The fact that both were sisters and there was never a separation period for anyr of them to really decide what they wanted also complicates the love theory.

If Arjun and Purvi were not so eager to marry immediately, would Ovi have gone so far as to make the deal with Purvi? Would she have realised that she didn't love Arjun after all? Would Arjun have realised that he did not want to lose Ovi at any cost and realise that Purvi was just an infatuation after all?

You are right, we would never know if there was a separation period with both these relationship - if it could be different. Also, the fact that Arjun was forced into the marriage (emotionally) could probably result in this lingering feeling that he feels for Purvi. I too am confused, whether he loved either Ovi or Purvi, or loves both women. The problem is CVs aren't great creator characters, so we get this shabby defined characters, that become confusing in a sense. I mean, say, even if after Arvi union, Arjun could aspire for Ovi, what then?? I mean, in reality, there are ppl, who ends up loving 2 different women (for different reasons) at the same time - that could surely take this to another level of pavitra rishta😆

Maybe Purvi was also just lusting after Arjun and was not in love with him. While I think it is a person's choice whether they want to have sex before marriage , when you really look at Purvi's upbringing, this is supposed to be a middle class girl who would have been told to wait for marriage before having sex {as evidenced when she exposed Punni's affair}. How then does it justify that she could not wait one more night for the wedding? How could she have given up the man she just handed her virginity to sp easily? Certainly not for Archana's happiness because the fact is that Purvi knew Sachin was blackmailing Archana and all she had to do was tell Manav the truth. Then she would have saved Archana's marriage and her own to Arjun.

But she gave him up easily right after having sex with him, she ordered Arjun to have sex with her sister and all without a broken heart. So my view is that Arjun was also a novelty to her - rich business man falling for her - but she was in lust with him.

I do think that Arjun was a novelty too, to purvi. And even I agree a middle class can't just have sex that too, a day before. It goes against their innat nature. The unspoken boundary is very hard to cross, and that social recognition of a marriage becomes a prerequisite for sex.

Arjun certainly cannot be in love with Purvi. It had to be lust to some extent. A normal person just will not be able to bear the thought of another man having sex with the woman you love.

Agreed😆

As I said a huge topic and I am looking forward to reading everyone's posts.

Originally posted by: Dabulls23

Just like Purvi was talking to VT of PSH abt pyaar and Sugni...Its simply amazing 🤢

Originally posted by: pari87

Great topic Kalapi...:) It is good to discuss something else other than Purvi and her endless kaands :P It is getting tiring to repeat same old arguments again and again..she is beyond redemption and none of us could care less if she dies in a car accident on the show or runs away with a handsome stranger leaving both Onir and Arjun behind..:P

Kools, Kalapi, Varsha Di, hilly, Julie fantastic posts :) Loved reading them...reading about lust first thing in the morning..ahhaha

Hilly, loved your post on Onir and what lust means to him and how a woman perceives him versus Arjun.

My take is, lust is simply pure physical attraction. This can be with some hot guy/girl across you at the bar, where he/she is so physically attractive, one wants to go kiss him/her or more. There is no need here to know the person, or like them for their personality. Heck, one need not even make conversation in this case. 😆 That is the main point behind one night stands, random hook ups and flings. Other than alcohol ofcourse. :P Alcohol only gives one the disinhibition to go for it, but lust is a feeling that happens naturally just like love.

That is pure basic human feeling, just as pure as love is. I agree with Kools that lust is not negative at all and with Varsha di that you may lust for a person but it may not lead to love and if you love a person. you obviously lust for them.

Lust and love both need to be controlled depending on situations and the person across you. That is why human beings are gifted the ability for thinking. They don't mate randomly and they know how to think things through in a norm based society. If there were no social norms against pre-marital sex, we would have hundreds of babies without fathers and a proper family. If there were no social norms, you could pretty much hook up with any one and everyone at the bar and make babies with each guy...no concept of marriage, or commitment would be needed. Saying this in context with some random posts talking about moral codes and broad mindedness and why any society has norms. It is for curbing the raw desires in human beings, like sex and aggression which can be negative if not controlled by societal norms and laws.

Arjun- I agree with EVERYONE on what makes him tick with Purvi. The Canadian brought up aggressive and arrogant boy has never had a woman stand up to him like that. If you notice, he is shown to not have ANY friends in Canada besides Ovi and Sachin and Teju. Now Teju could care less about him, but Ovi has always given in to him, always treated him like god and given him the support his arrogance and ego needed. So Purvi being this wildfire giving him back and caring two hoots about his handsome and amazing self, was absolute Indian novelty. Plus, her new age sanskaars and middle class bhashans was also novelty to a boy who has not had any such exposure to such a lifestyle before. Her reluctance at his advances, her backing off on his physical moves at her, her high handed attitude about her sanskaari pavitra self was all very charming to our boy. He saw challenge. I love the reference to men are hunters. It is an adrenaline rush for men to conquer what is difficult. Whether it is empires or women, it is a basic sense in men. So his boyishness led him to feel attracted to purvi and then love happened...The pre-marital sex was all a lust combined with love thing where the woman he loves was wet in the rains and alone in a shack...

Now for his deal with Ovi, I think you NEED to have some kind of attraction to have sex. To be that intimate with someone, you've got to feel some kind of attraction that turns you on. Unless he was being a creep and lowlife by imagining purvi while doing it with ovi...That itself over-rides his basic character and makes him a degraded man. But, I think all the past instances where he showed jealousy, agreed to marry her earlier, stayed in this marriage and had a pretty loving rain dance and sex and morning after was pleasant for him...shows that he has some attraction towards ovi..it may not be love, but it definitely is a sort of comfortable feeling for him to be around her...She shares his childhood and a lot more memories than purvi could have shared in the 6 months that they fooled around...Ovi is like daal and purvi is like biryani, but a man wants both. A lot of men who lust outside of marriage, because their wife is growing older, or the secretary is so much more younger and attractive..For arjun, it is opposite, he loves purvi, but his wife is the attractive, and the more ego-massaging woman all men want too...so he lusts inside his house, while he loves outside...:P

If physical attraction or nothing was needed to have sex, then why hasn't purvi gone ahead with onir yet? She should also fulfill patni duties with onir, like some suggest that arjun is only fulfilling marital duties by having sex with ovi..That is the single most foolish thing I have heard.

Onir, is obviously way more mature than Arjun, and also with that maturity comes a lot of patience and tolerance that Arjun lacks. Onir has given Purvi the space and time to "feel" it before haq jamaoing..This is because he does not just lust for Purvi, but loves her too. That is why he wants her to feel comfortable and as attracted to him for having sex, as he is to her. That kind of men are rare and it is only amazing that he has waited so long. He may be sly about it too, as he knows exactly what is making her feel the heat and this is this exactly, his silence and patience...Now she is feeling jealous and playing her patni dharm, because he has made her want him patiently...If Arjun's so called Sherlock giri falls flat, I see Purvi falling for Onir and finally giving in to him too...She is not happy with the idea of sharing him with another woman and this attachment and jealousy is first step in love and love obviously leads to lust.

I don't think Purvi ever loved Arjun. It was easy enough to fathom the idea of him with her sister and with him having sex also with her sister. She never felt uncomfortable with the idea and saying it out loud. She never showed much jealousy or feeling bad when Arjun-Ovi had their marital talks or whatever. Arjun shows that jealousy when Purvi is talking to Onir, as so many episodes have shown. Purvi has never shown this attachment to Arjun that she is showing towards Onir right now. Maybe it is Onir who has taught her what love is.

Haa, I think I have simply re-iterated what everyone said..Too lazy to edit post..sorry for the rant guys :)

Originally posted by: hillydee

Oh sorry I should have used the word lust to answer your question directly.

To me you cannot have sex with someone unless you feel lust for them initially.

What I was referring to is the different stages that Arjun felt lust for both girls. I feel Arjun had lust/passion for Ovi, along with friendship( I should not have used the word attraction because that is different). So, Arjun has lust/passion for Ovi along with intimacy. That is why he could consummate with Ovi both coached and not coached. Either way he had no problem having sex with her.

Arjun developed lust/passion for Purvi after she mentally stimulated him,she challenged him, he admired her as some so called business expert etc. She turned him on (lust) then the lust transformed to attraction/romantic passion. The attraction is what makes him can't get over her. To me this is not love, but it has enough power to make it seem like they are in love.

Arjun is not in love with either girls, but the romantic passion he has for Purvi, makes it hard for him to forget her. However, he does not feel this romantic passion for Ovi, only the raw lust/ passion, so that is why he is not so crazy for her,but he can still enjoy sex with her even if he is not coached. The intimacy/friendship they share, adds a softer touch to the lust/passion though, so that is why at the end of the day, he feels some sort of obligation to their relationship. That is why he stayed in the marriage with her. I think he told himself that if he can't be with Purvi, Ovi is not a bad choice since he has all the factors I mentioned before with her, lust/passion and intimacy.

If you look at it though for a logical point of view in terms of how true love is formed, there was more hope for Arjun and Ovi. Since, the cvs have no clue about these things, we are stuck with Arvi.

Overall I am saying Lust/passion is the initial physical connection to the person sexually, that makes you want to have sex with them, then it can develop to romantic passion, where you feel that romantic connection with the sexual urge.

Arjun would have to lust for both girls initially to have sex with them.

There is no way he could have sex with either of them without the initial lust.

Lust is not a bad thing, even it transcends into other realms. If it is stays as lust, then that is not good, this is obsession.

Hope I finally answered your question.😆

Originally posted by: hillydee

I think Onir is more mature than Arjun, so he plays his cards differently. His agenda is to have sex just like Arjun, but he wants Purvi when she is "ready." He is the type to patiently wait, this can drive a woman to eventually want you more (in my Pov), she will fall so in love she can't leave him. However, the cvs want to tell us differently.

Arjun is immature, and does not have much confidence, so that is why he insisted on the premarital sex the night before. If Onir was in his place, he would have waited till their wedding night.

If Arjun had waited, maybe the fact that Purvi did not get to "have," Arjun,(I believe she has control issues) she would have told Ovi to shove the deal up her🤬 As much as I wanted ArOvi, I would have had more respect for Purvi then. That is another story.

Onir will romance Purvi till she go mad with lust. 😆 Onir seem like the silent deadly type of man. I know he lusted for Purvi, but he plays his cards differently.😆 he is the type to get in the ladies head so he can get you know where.😆 He already have Purvi jealous over him.😆

Poor Arjun was never in Purvi's head that is why she could tell him to marry Ovi and consummate with her. 😆

Originally posted by: koolsadhu1000

Agree with hilly and Varsha

fab posts all . Hilly i agree about Onir . He is terribly mature .

If Arjun is the type to feel attracted to 2 women at a time , Purvi is the type to go for subservience in men . Her husband or boyfriend must be subservient to her . Completely follow her wishes .

Ovi is pretty but doen't know how to be a woman . A woman needs sharp instincts and understand the need to change her personality towards a man . She should know when to play games , when the man needs a stiff drink , when to play coy , when to be silent and not argue, when to pretend to be demure [ like Purvi . I will sin if u touch my feet . This after making him sleep on the floor .] and when to not act too clingy .

Ovi is straightforward . She doesn't know to play games .

Purvi is dominant and very lucky coz she finds men who like her dominance . If Arjun is titillated by it , Onir is amused by it .[ His remark when they were eating pani puri ...u r very dominating , u know that .]

Onir is NOT a wuss but very mature and knows what he wants . When he takes a decision or sets a goal , he accomplishes it . Hence Purvi's grudging respect and admiration for him . While Arjun is a boy , Onir is a man .

Originally posted by: Kalapi

But aren't all woman's natural instinct is to act coy and lay games...isn't to some extend that is her seond nature...so, I find that Ovi never had any innate instincts in herself to lead Arjun's on...she was always so willing that was easily taken for a ride and thought of as an background object. Don't know, why Cvs never showed even some amount of coyness in her...even Teju, shows those mock angers towards Sunny, but Ovi was shown too straightforward...Cvs are really stupid...

Originally posted by: pari87

Great topic Kalapi...:) It is good to discuss something else other than Purvi and her endless kaands :P It is getting tiring to repeat same old arguments again and again..she is beyond redemption and none of us could care less if she dies in a car accident on the show or runs away with a handsome stranger leaving both Onir and Arjun behind..:P

Kools, Kalapi, Varsha Di, hilly, Julie fantastic posts :) Loved reading them...reading about lust first thing in the morning..ahhaha

Hilly, loved your post on Onir and what lust means to him and how a woman perceives him versus Arjun.

My take is, lust is simply pure physical attraction. This can be with some hot guy/girl across you at the bar, where he/she is so physically attractive, one wants to go kiss him/her or more. There is no need here to know the person, or like them for their personality. Heck, one need not even make conversation in this case. 😆 That is the main point behind one night stands, random hook ups and flings. Other than alcohol ofcourse. :P Alcohol only gives one the disinhibition to go for it, but lust is a feeling that happens naturally just like love.

That is pure basic human feeling, just as pure as love is. I agree with Kools that lust is not negative at all and with Varsha di that you may lust for a person but it may not lead to love and if you love a person. you obviously lust for them.

Lust and love both need to be controlled depending on situations and the person across you. That is why human beings are gifted the ability for thinking. They don't mate randomly and they know how to think things through in a norm based society. If there were no social norms against pre-marital sex, we would have hundreds of babies without fathers and a proper family. If there were no social norms, you could pretty much hook up with any one and everyone at the bar and make babies with each guy...no concept of marriage, or commitment would be needed. Saying this in context with some random posts talking about moral codes and broad mindedness and why any society has norms. It is for curbing the raw desires in human beings, like sex and aggression which can be negative if not controlled by societal norms and laws.

Arjun- I agree with EVERYONE on what makes him tick with Purvi. The Canadian brought up aggressive and arrogant boy has never had a woman stand up to him like that. If you notice, he is shown to not have ANY friends in Canada besides Ovi and Sachin and Teju. Now Teju could care less about him, but Ovi has always given in to him, always treated him like god and given him the support his arrogance and ego needed. So Purvi being this wildfire giving him back and caring two hoots about his handsome and amazing self, was absolute Indian novelty. Plus, her new age sanskaars and middle class bhashans was also novelty to a boy who has not had any such exposure to such a lifestyle before. Her reluctance at his advances, her backing off on his physical moves at her, her high handed attitude about her sanskaari pavitra self was all very charming to our boy. He saw challenge. I love the reference to men are hunters. It is an adrenaline rush for men to conquer what is difficult. Whether it is empires or women, it is a basic sense in men. So his boyishness led him to feel attracted to purvi and then love happened...The pre-marital sex was all a lust combined with love thing where the woman he loves was wet in the rains and alone in a shack...

Now for his deal with Ovi, I think you NEED to have some kind of attraction to have sex. To be that intimate with someone, you've got to feel some kind of attraction that turns you on. Unless he was being a creep and lowlife by imagining purvi while doing it with ovi...That itself over-rides his basic character and makes him a degraded man. But, I think all the past instances where he showed jealousy, agreed to marry her earlier, stayed in this marriage and had a pretty loving rain dance and sex and morning after was pleasant for him...shows that he has some attraction towards ovi..it may not be love, but it definitely is a sort of comfortable feeling for him to be around her...She shares his childhood and a lot more memories than purvi could have shared in the 6 months that they fooled around...Ovi is like daal and purvi is like biryani, but a man wants both. A lot of men who lust outside of marriage, because their wife is growing older, or the secretary is so much more younger and attractive..For arjun, it is opposite, he loves purvi, but his wife is the attractive, and the more ego-massaging woman all men want too...so he lusts inside his house, while he loves outside...:P

If physical attraction or nothing was needed to have sex, then why hasn't purvi gone ahead with onir yet? She should also fulfill patni duties with onir, like some suggest that arjun is only fulfilling marital duties by having sex with ovi..That is the single most foolish thing I have heard.

Onir, is obviously way more mature than Arjun, and also with that maturity comes a lot of patience and tolerance that Arjun lacks. Onir has given Purvi the space and time to "feel" it before haq jamaoing..This is because he does not just lust for Purvi, but loves her too. That is why he wants her to feel comfortable and as attracted to him for having sex, as he is to her. That kind of men are rare and it is only amazing that he has waited so long. He may be sly about it too, as he knows exactly what is making her feel the heat and this is this exactly, his silence and patience...Now she is feeling jealous and playing her patni dharm, because he has made her want him patiently...If Arjun's so called Sherlock giri falls flat, I see Purvi falling for Onir and finally giving in to him too...She is not happy with the idea of sharing him with another woman and this attachment and jealousy is first step in love and love obviously leads to lust.

I don't think Purvi ever loved Arjun. It was easy enough to fathom the idea of him with her sister and with him having sex also with her sister. She never felt uncomfortable with the idea and saying it out loud. She never showed much jealousy or feeling bad when Arjun-Ovi had their marital talks or whatever. Arjun shows that jealousy when Purvi is talking to Onir, as so many episodes have shown. Purvi has never shown this attachment to Arjun that she is showing towards Onir right now. Maybe it is Onir who has taught her what love is.

Haa, I think I have simply re-iterated what everyone said..Too lazy to edit post..sorry for the rant guys :)